University of Virginia Library

88. LXXXVIII.
A CONVERSATION WITH GENERAL McSTINGER, OF
THE STATE OF GEORGIA, WHICH IS INTERRUPTED
BY A SUBJUGATED REBEL.

[1] Sence the November elections I hev bin spendin the heft uv
my time in Washinton. I find a melankoly pleasure in ling'rin
around the scene uv so many Demokratic triumphs. Here it
wuz that Brooks, the heroic, bludgeoned Summer; here it wuz
that Calhoon, and Yancey, and Breckinridge achieved their
glory and renown. Besides, it's the easiest place to dodge a
board bill in the Yoonited States. There's so many Congressmen

here who resemble me, that I hev no difficulty in passin
for one two thirds uv the time.

Yisterday I met, in the readin-room uv Willard's, Ginral
MacStinger, of South Karliny. The Ginral is here on the
same bizness most uv the Southern men hev in this classic
city, that uv prokoorin a pardon, wich he hed prokoored, and
wuz gittin ready to go home and accept the nominashen for
Congress in his deestrick.

The Ginral wuz gloomy. Things didn't soot him, he observed,
and he wuz afeerd that the country wuz on the high road to
rooin. He hed bin absent from the United States suthin over
four yeers, wich time he hed spent in the Southern Confederacy.
When he went out the Constooshnel Dimocrisy hed some rites
wich wuz respected. On his return wat did he see? The
power in the hands uv Radikals, Ablishnism in the majority
everywhere, a ex-tailor President, — a state uv affairs disgustin
in the extreme to the highly sensitive Southern mind. He had
accepted a pardon only becoz he felt hisself constrained to put
hisself into position to go to Congress, that the country might
be reskood from its impendin peril. He shood go to Congress,
and then he shood ask the despots who now hev control,
whether, —

1. They spozed the South wood submit to hoomiliatin condishns?

2. What Androo Johnson means by dictatin to the Convenshuns
uv sovereign States?

“Why,” sez he, “but a few days ago this boor hed the
ashoorence to write to the Georgy Convenshun that it `must
not' — mark the term — `MUST NOT assoom the confedrit war
debt.' Is a tailor to say `must not' to chivelrus Georgy?
Good God! — where are we driftin? For one, I never will be
consilliated on them terms — never! I never wuz used to that
style uv talk in Dimekratic convenshuns.

“Ez soon ez I take my seat in Congris,” resoomed he, “I
shel deliver a speech, wich I writ the day after Lee surrendered,
so ez to hev it ready, in which I shel take the follerin
ground, to wit: —

“That the South hev buried the hatchit, and hev diskivered
that they love the old Union above anything on earth. But,

“The North must meet us half way, or we won't be answerable
for the consekences. Ez a basis for a settlement, I shel
insist on the follerin condishens: —

“The Federal debt must be repoodiated, principal and interest,
or ef paid, the Southern war debt must be paid likewise —
ez a peece offerin. The doctrine uv State Rites must be made
the soopreme law uv the land, that the South may withdraw
whenever they feel theirselves dissatisfied with Massachoosetts.
Uv course this is a olive branch.

“Jefferson Davis must be to-wunst set at liberty and Sumner
hung, ez proof that the North is really concilliatory. On
this point I am inflexible, and on the others immovable.”

An old man who hed bin listenin to our talk, murmured that
there wuz a parallel to this last proposishen.

“Where?” demanded the Genral.

“The Jews, I remember,” replied he, “demanded that
Barabbas be released unto them, who wuz a thief, I believe,
and the Savior be crucified, but I forgit jist how it wuz.”

The Ginral withered him with a litenin glance, and resoomed:
—

“I shel, uv course, offer the North suthin in the way uv
compensation, for the troo theory uv a Republikin Guvernment
is compermise. On our part we pledge ourselves to come
back, and give the North the benefit uv our comin back, so
long ez Massachoosetts conducts herself accordin to our ijees
uv what is rite. But ef this ekitable adjustment is rejected,
all I hev to say then is, I shel resign, and the Government may
sink without wun effort from me to save it.”

I wuz about to give in my experience, when the old man,
who wuz sittin near us, broke in agin: —

“My name,” sed he, “is Maginnis, and I live in Alabama. I
want to say a word to the gentleman from Karliny, and to the
wun from Noo Jersey.”

“How,” retorted I, “do yoo know I'm from Noo Jersey, not
hevin spoken a word in yoor hearin?”

“By a instink I hev. Whenever I see a Sutherner layin it
down heavy to a indivijooel whose physiognamy is uv sich a
cast that upon beholdin it yoo instinktively feel to see that
yoor pocket-handkercher is safe, a face that wood be dangerous

ef it had courage into it, I alluz know the latter to be a Northern
Copperhead. The Noo Jersey part I guessed at, becoz, my
friend, that State furnished the lowest order uv Copperheads of
any uv em. Pardon me ef I flatter yoo. But what I wanted to
say wuz, that I spose suthin hez happened doorin the past four
years. I was a original secessionist. Sum years ago I hed a
hundred niggers, and wuz doin well with em. But, unforchunitly,
my brother died, and left me ez much more land, but no
niggers. I wanted niggers enuff to work that land, and sposed
ef cut off from the North, and the slave-trade wuz reopened, I
cood git em cheaper. Hence I seceshed. Sich men ez Genral
McStinger told me the North woodent fight or I woodent hev
secesht, but I did. I went out for wool and cum back shorn.
I seceshed with 100 niggers to git 200, and alas! I find myself
back into the old government, with nary a nigger.

“But all this is no excoose for talkin bald noncents. Yoo
old ass,” sed he, addressin Genral McStinger, “yoo talk uv wat
yoo will do, and what yoo won't. Heven't yoo diskivered that
yoo are whipped? Heven't yoo found out that yoo are subjoogated?
Are yoo back into the Union uv yoor own free
will and akkord? Heven't yoo got a pardon in yoor pockit,
which dockyment is all that saves yoor neck from stretchin
hemp? Why do yoo talk uv wat South Carliny will and wont
do? Good Lord! I recollect about a year since South Carliny
wood never permit her soil to be pollutid by Yankee hirelins,
yit Sherman marched all over it with a few uv em, and skacely
a gun was fired at em. So too I recollect that that sed State,
wich wuz agoin to whip the entire North, and wich wood, ef
overpowered, submit gracefully and with dignity to annihilation,
and sich, wuz the first to git down on her marrow bones,
and beg for peace like a dorg. Ef yoo intend this talk for the
purpose uv skarin the North, beleeve me when I say that the
North ain't so easy skared ez it wuz. Ef it's intendid for home
consumption, consider me the people. I've heard it before,
and I'll take no more uv it until my stumick settles. It makes
me sick. The fact is we are whipped, and hev got to do the
best we kin. We are a goin to pay the Federal debt, and ain't
goin to pay the Confederit debt. Davis will be hung, and
serve him rite. States rites is dead, and slavery is abolished,

and with it chivelry; and it's my opinion the South is a d — d
sight better off without either of em. I kin sware, now,
after livin outside uv the shadder uv the flag four years, that I
love it! You bet I do. I carry a small one in my coat pocket.
I hev a middlin sized one waved by my youngest boy over the
family when at prayers, and a whalin big one wavin over my
house all the time. I hev diskivered that it's a good thing to
live under, and when sich cusses as yoo talk uv what yoo will
and won't do under it, I bile. Go home, yoo cusses, go home!
Yoo, South, and pullin orf yoor coat, go to work, thankin God
that Johnson's merciful enuff to let yoo go home at all, insted
uv hangin yoo up like a dorg, for tryin to bust a Guverment
too good for yoo. Yoo, North, thankful that the men uv sense
uv the North hed the manhood to prevent us from rooinin ourselves
by makin sich ez yoo our niggers. Avaunt!”

And the excited Mr. Maginnis, who is evidently subjoogated,
strode out uv our presence. His intemperit talk cast a chill
over our confidencis, and we didn't resoom with the ease and
freedom we commenced with, and in a few minutes we parted.
I didn't like him.