8. VIII.
IN CANADA.
Brest, Kanada West, August the 20th, 1862.
[1]
After more advenchers than wood fill a book, I am here in
Kanada, safe under the protectin tail uv the British Lion,
where no draftin orfiser kin molest nor make me afraid. Halleloogy!
I never shood hev taken this step hed a good, sound, constooshnel
doctor bin appinted Medical Eggsaminer; fer I hev
twict ez menny diseases ez wood hev eggsemptid me, but I
wuz afeerd the Eggsaminer woodent see em, ez he aint much
uv a physician anyhow; besides, he votes the Union tickit, and
hez, uv coarse, prejudisis. The Commissioner is a bloody
Ablishnist; and I owe him a store bill wich hez stood about 8
years. I protest agin all sich appintments.
I left, in company with five other invalids, wun nite, a little
after the “witchin hour uv 12 M.,” ez Shakspeer hez it, and
any wun beholdin our faces wood hev bin satisfide that sum
“church-yard yawned” jest previously. We traveld all nite,
“sustaned and soothed by an unfaltrin trust” in a bottle wich I,
with my usual foresite, took along, together with two and
one third yards uv bolony sassige, wich I alluz use ez a thirstprovoker.
We met no interrupshen till we got within five
miles uv Toledo (wich we did by 5 P. M. uv the next day —
wich, permit me to remark, wus good travelin fer sich debillytatid
cusses), when we wuz stopt by a pickit-gard uv the
“Anti-draftin Invalid League,” who remarkt: “Who goes
there?” “A invalid,” sez I. “A Peece invalid?” sez he.
“Ther aint no other kind,” sez I; whereupon sez he, “Yoor
a man uv sence;” a fact uv wich I hed been long aware. I
presented my liquid consiliater, when he informed me that
Toledo wuz closely watcht, that escape by steemer was impossible,
and that a small boat was our only chance. He took
us to the lake shore, furnisht us a boat, and, jest as the sun
wuz a sinkin behind the golden horizon, I bid my nativ land
adoo.
I need not dwell upon the perils uv that terrible passage.
Suffice it to say, that, for invalids, we rowed well, and finally
landed at the little village uv Brest, wher we now are.
Two hundred peece men are here, and I must acknowledge
that we are not treeted with that distinguished consideration
usually accordid political eggsiles. Fer instance, at the tavern
where I board, the parlor is partikelerly pleasent, and I wuz a
settin into it. In trips a girl, purty enuff for a man whose taste
wuz not vishiated to eat. “Shel I shet down this window,
sir?” sez she. “Why shet it down, gentle maid?” retorts
I, lookin sweet onto her. “Because,” replide she, “I thot
perhaps, the DRAFT was too much for ye.” A few slavish
Kanajens, who set there, laft. The landlord required a month's
pay in advance, and a further deposit uv 25 cents per eggsile,
as sekoority fer the pewter spoons wich we hev at table. To
cap the climacks, last nite a big nigger was put into eech uv
our rooms, and we were forced to sleep with em, or okkepy
the floor, wich I did. The cussid nigger laft all nite, in a manner
trooly aggravatin to hear.
Petroleum V. Nasby.
P. S. — Tell my wife to send sich money as she earns, to
me, as livin is high, and ther aint no tick. The township kin
support her and the childern.
