153. CLIII.
THE NOVEMBER ELECTION.
Post Offis, Confedrit × Roads }
(wich is in the Stait uv Kentucky),
November 10, 1867.
[1]
The Corners wuz prostrated with joy last nite at the receet
uv the news uv the November elecshuns. Ther wuz nothin
demonstrative about our joy, ez there hed bin on occasions uv
less interest. No! the result wuz too great, too overwhelminly
great! Our nachers wuz filled with joy, and it bubbled up to
the eyes, and slopt over in floods uv teers. Deekin Pogram's
dawter Mirandy borrered a tamborine, wich wood answer for a
timbrel, and attempted to dance down the street, after the
fashion uv Miriam, singin, “Shout the glad tidens,” et settry,
but we rebookt her. Sich exultashen seemed to us inadekate.
The Deekin met me, and fallin onto my neck, wept perfoosely
down my back, wich I stood ez long ez I cood bear the moisture.
Gently disengagin him, I led him to Bascom's, fearin
that so great a waste uv flooids wood cut short the old saint's
life, unless that waste cood be repaired. We supplied the
deficiency to-wunst. Never saw I sich a picter. The blessid
old man sittin onto a bench, a glass uv hot whiskey in his
hand; his white hair a fallin scantily about his temples, and
tears a running in rapid succession adown his frost-bitten nose,
and, glitterin a moment on the tip, droppin, like strings uv
pearls, into the space below! It wuz tetchin!
The citizens met that evening, not to rejoice, but to adopt
sich measures for turning the victry to account ez the occasion
seemed to demand. The Deekin wuz there, and I beleeve
every white male citizen uv the Corners wuz in his seet afore
the glad peals uv the bell hed ceased pealin. I assoomed the
chair, and stated the object uv the meetin. Noo York hed
spoken, and Noo Jersey, the blessed State uv which I hed the
honor to be a native, hed returned to her fust love. I wuz not
now ashamed to own that I wuz a native uv Noo Jersey. I
am proud uv it, and were it not for the fact that I owe neerly
half uv her citizens, in sums rangin from a half dollar up to
eighteen, I wood return there to-wunst. But I won't. It
wood awaken expectations in their buzzums wich wood never
be fulfilled, and I'm too tender-hearted, too considrit uv the
feelins uv others, to lasserate them feelins. I can't properly
express my emoshuns. Thank Heaven the nigger is ourn.
The Northern States hev spoken, and in thunder tones. The
Ethiopian wunst wuz on the top wave, but wher is he now?
Two years ago he wuz needed — but now wher is he? The
Ablishnists don't need him no more to fill up ther quotas, they
don't need him no more to take ther places in the next draft,
and thank the Lord he's the same d—d nigger he alluz wuz!
The stink uv the nigger hez overcome ther gratitood to him —
ther good feelin hez bin swamped by ther prejoodis. The
Dimocrasy uv the two sections uv the Yoonion hez rusht into
each other's arms, the nigger wuz between em, and consekently
is under our feet. What happinis for Kentucky! The
nigger can't go North with the elecshen returns starin him in
the face, and ef he stays here he must stay on our terms.
Thank the Lord.
Deekin Pogram sed that he hednt felt so good sence his first
wife died. He felt too good to speek, and the brethren wood
excuse him ef his remarks shood be breef. (We will! We
will! with great yoonanimity.) Four weeks ago, when we
heerd from Ohio and Pennsylvany, he hed to-wunst drawd up a
skedule uv the loss that hed bin inflicted onto him by the
tyranical edict uv the Illinoy Goriller, a copy uv wich he
wood reed: —
YOONITED STATES UV AMERIKY,
In Account with Gabrel Pogram, |
Dr. |
| To 1 nigger, Sam, 26 years old |
$1,500 00 |
| 1 nigger, Pompey, 30 years old |
1,300 00 |
| 1 nigger, Scip, 30 years old |
1,400 00 |
| 1 nigger, Peter, 40 years old |
1,000 00 |
To one lot misselaneous niggers, 22 in number,
mostly crippled, and not uv much akkount,
hevin bin flogd and chawd by dorgs, and injoored
by being knockt about the head and
back, a dissiplinin uv em, at say, $500 each, |
11,000 00 |
To one nigger gal, Jane, 18 years old, nearly
white, with bloo eyes and curly hair, for wich
I hed bin offered $2,500 to go to Noo Orleans, |
2,500 00 |
To other wenches, uv all shades and ages, 12 in
number, averagin, say, $500, |
6,000 00 |
|
$24,700 00 |
This bill he determined to put in, becoz uv this property he
hed bin robbed. Last nite he heerd uv the result uv the Noo
York and Noo Jersey elecshuns, aad he felt that more yit wuz
due him from the unconstooshnel government under wich we
are forst to live. He wanted pay, not only for his twenty-four
thousand dollars' worth uv nigger, but legle interest on
the amount, from Emancipashen to date, incloodin wat he paid
to hev the calculation made, and the interest figgered onto it,
and he wanted it in gold, ez he considered greenbax jist ez
unconstooshnel ez emancipashen.
Issaker Gavitt remarkt, that he hed a claim on the oppressors.
He hed made out no bill ez yit, ez the nigger wich alluz
did the figgerin for his father got to be impudent, and woodent
do it no more. But he shood get somebody who cood write to
copy the Deekin's bill, wich wood answer, ez the two farms
workt about the same number uv hands, tho uv fancy stock his
father hed alluz kept the most, wich accountid for his bein
more bald-headed than the Deekin.
Kernel McPelter wantid no pay. He wantid his niggers.
To accept pay wood be to acknollege the right uv a Illinoy
goriller to releese em, wich he wood never do. He hed one
— he saw her to-day — wich he wood hev back agin. Her
and her husband, wich hed bin married sence they wuz torn
from him, hed purchist ten akers uv ground up toards Garrettstown,
and wuz a livin onto it. Uv course, ez the emancipashun
wuz illegal, the produx uv their labor sence that time wuz
hizzen, jest the same ez though they remained in their normal
condishen. The ten askers woodent make him good, but they
hed two children born to em sence, wich, ef niggers brot any
price, wood do suthin toards it.
Bascom perferred to hev Government pay ther valyoo, and
let em stay free. They all hed some property now — leastways
they could do wat they pleased with their money. Troo,
the heft uv the proceeds uv their labor went to Pollock for dry
goods, and groceries, and sich, but he bleeved that they wuz a
imitative race. Ef they followed the eggsample sot em by their
white sooperiors, they wood, in time, leave the heft uv it at his
bar. He hed a few uv em under trainin now, and he notist
that they wuz better customers than the whites, ez they didn't
swaller their rashens and tell him to “jist chalk it down.”
A sense uv the meetin wuz then taken, and a majority voted
to fust try to redoose them to their normal condishen, and ef
that wuz decided to be impracticable, then we cood, with still
better grace, demand their valyoo uv the Government.
“Yes,” exclaimed Kernel McPelter, “and for this great
work ther is no better time than now. `The Yoonyun ez it
wuz!' Foller me!”
And forthwith the entire congregashun piled out, rushing
toward the nigger settlement on the Garrettstown road.
Arrivin at the settlement, a consultashen wuz held. It wuz
desided that I shood advance to the doors uv the houses
and demand surrender, but I declined. Kernel McPelter
volunteered, and we all waited the result. He knocked at the
door uv the first house.
“Wha' d'ye want?” exclaimed a voice.
“I want yoo,” sed the Kernel.
“Wa' foah?”
“My friend,” sed the Kernel, impressively, “ef I recognize
yoor dulcet tone, yoor my nigger. Four years ago yoo wuz
set free, yoo sposed, by Linkin; but we've done away with
that. Come forth, and give yoorself up; you shel, ef yoo go
peaceably, hev yoor old quarters agin, and be treated ez
uv old.”
“Go away, white man, and stop yoor foolin. Dis nigga's
in bed!”
“Break down the doors!” yelled the Deekin, “and hev
done with it!” and a rush wuz made.
The doors wuz broke down, and in a minit the nigger and
his wife, and two children, wuz out in the street, bound, and
the Kernel hed the furnitoor packet, ready to take to his own
house. In the mean time assaults hed bin made on two other
houses, with ruther different results. Deekin Pogram led one
on the house uv a former slave uv hizzen, and wuz disabled by
a charge uv shot in his leg, and the infooriated nigger threw
open the winder and swore that he'd empty tother barrel into
the head uv the first man who came within range. The whole
settlement wuz by this time alarmed, and lites sprang up, and
we cood hear the click uv cocks uv muskets, and the pilin up
uv furnitoor afore the doors. It wuz desided that the attempt
to re-enslave em be given over for that nite, and carryin the
Deekin, who wuz weak from loss uv blood, we made our way
to the Corners agin.
The result demonstrated to me the impossibility uv the two
races livin together in harmony. There is a natral antagonism
between em wich must result inevitably in a war uv races,
onless their status is fixed by law. So long ez they are among
us, so long shel we be tempted to subdoo em, and sich soleharrowin
scenes ez that uv last nite will result. Ez I heer the
groans uv that prostrated saint, Deekin Pogram (this is written
at his bedside in the intervals uv feedin him likker with a
spoon), I feel ez tho I must vindicate my birth by goin out and
killin a nigger. Nothin but the oncertainty ez to who wood be
killed restrains me. Thank Heaven, next yeer, when Seymore
is President, and the unconstitooshnel acts uv a Rump Congress
is done away with, all this will be fixed. It is this that
soothes the Deekin, and enables him to endoor his sufferins.
Petroleum V. Nasby, P. M.
(wich is Postmaster).
