University of Virginia Library

112. CXII.
A HORRIBLE VISION.

Last nite, for amoozement, I picked up a vollum
uv poems, ritten by wun Camell, and happened
to read a peece called “The Last Man.”
It 's a rayther heavy peece uv writin. His descriptive
powers are rather better than mine, tho,
perhaps, ef my too partial friends ain't too partial,
he is a long way behint me in the matter uv
pathetics, and in them fine tutches wich show the
man uv sole and sensibilities.

Be that ez it may, the pome made a impression
on me, (wich is proof that there is suthin in it,)
and it wuz onto my mind ez I retired to my virtoous
couch.

Skarcely hed I sunk into slumber, when my

viggerus intellek, wich even the bonds uv slumber
can't chain, wandered away into the misty
realms uv speckelashen. I hed the most horrible
vision that ever afflicted a sleepin man, wich the
bare recollekshun uv, causes a involuntary shudder
to thrill my susceptible frame.

Methawt a epidemic startid in Afrika, and cum
by reglar steps through Europe, and finally reeched
Noo York. For a time it raged alike among all
classes uv people, and among all colors and complexions.
The proud and hawty Caucassian, the
bold and patriotic Celt, the noble red man uv the
forest, (wich is pizen,) all, all, wuz swept away
by the relentless pestilence.

Finally, it abated. The white man and the
red man begun to escape the fangs uv death;
but among the niggers it raged wuss than ever.
Thro the South it swept like a tornado, sparin the
whites, but cuttin down every nigger in its path.
Ther wuz weepin and wailin. The hawty planter
saw in his nigger-quarters the brite octoroon, for
whom he hed paid $2500, and who hed solaced
his hours uv relaxashen with her charms—who
hed bore him girls almost perfekly white, wich,
on akkount uv hevin his blood in their vanes, he
hed been able to sell for $3000 and $4000 to other
planters, whose tastes run in that direckshun—he

saw her, the objeck uv his affeckshun, and a part
uv his estate, lyin a inanymait corpse, not worth
a cent for any purpose.

Likewise he saw his robust feeld-hands, each
wun with sinews and muscles uv iron—the males
harty and sound, without blemish; the females
capable uv raisin a picanniny wich wuz worth
$200 ez soon ez weened, wunst a year, and by a
little extra whippin do a year's work in the feeld
every 12 months, stretched cold corpses in the
feeld, the cotton unpicked, and his last year's
gamblin debts unpaid. Thus wuz disease out
rajin all the finer feelins uv humanity, and destroyin
relentlessly all that made life pleasant and
lovely.

Finally, nigger after nigger fell, until but two
remained in the Yoonited States. They wuz a
male and female, uv sich perfekly helthy systems,
that it seemed impossible for disease to tetch
them. When the epidemic wuz known to hev
settled down to niggers alone, the Dimokrasy
held a consultation, and fearin the race wood becum
extinct, hed selected these, hed carefully sekloodid
em from the world, and hed employed
twenty-four uv the most eminent medikle men uv
the world, to be with em constantly—each stayin
an hour—that, in case they showd eny symptoms,

the proper remedies mite be to wunst applide,
afore the disease got a hold. From these two, ef
the rest wuz destroyed, it wuz hoped a new stock
cood be raised, that the dangers uv negro equality
mite be still kept afore the Amerikin people.

But all to no purpus. The unsparin pestilence
smoted em, and, notwithstandin the efforts made
by the eminent physicians — notwithstandin the
prayers and groans uv the Dimokrasy — they
died!

Methawt the heavens wuz hung in black, and
ominus litenins shot athwart the skies. In the
distants low, mutrin thunders wuz heard, and the
beests uv the forests run affrighted from their
coverts. Dray hosses dropt dead in the streets;
dorgs run wildly, with their tongues a hangin out,
and the white foam droppin from their distendid
jaws. Ever and anon, pale, sickly gleams uv
lite flashed across the dark, leaden-colored clouds,
givin nacher the appearance uv labrin under a
severe attack uv yaller janders.

The last nigger wuz dead!

Presently, the leaders uv the Dimokrasy begun
to assemble.

Fernandywood cum.

“Alars!” sez he, sobbin ez tho his hart wood
break, and kissin the cold corpse—“Farewell, my

hopes—a long and larst farewell! Thou wust our
corner-stun; on thee we built. Thou wust our
cappitle, our cheefest trust. We used yoo—we
aboozed yoo—and in aboozin yoo found our profit.
Yoo wuz ordained to be the cuss uv Ameriky—we
wuz ordained to be alluz fearful uv yoor bein our
sooperior—to us wuz entrusted the deliteful task
uv keepin yoo down, and us over yoo. Our task
is ended with thee. Kin we any more rally our
people to the poles, by yawpin the dangers uv nigger
equality, when ther ain't no nigger? This,
now, is a white man's guverment—we hev nuthin
left to contend for, and thus I foller thee.”

And Fernandy, who hed found a jack-knife in
the nigger's vest-pockit, run it into his bowils, and
fell a dead corpse across his body.

Franklin Peerse approached and wailed thus:

“And art thou gone, last uv the Afrikins?
Cood not the avengin ministers uv death hev
taken sum other race? Cood not the noble Injin
bin taken, and thou spared to Demokrasy? No
white man feered his supremacy. Cood not the
Chinese hev bin sacrificed in thy stead? The people
hed no prejoodis agin his color. Thou wust
all that made me uv yoose, and ez thou art gone,
so I go also.”

And takin the jack-knife out uv Fernandy's

hand, he stabbed hisself with it, and fell dead atop
uv Fernandy.

Vallandigum approached, weepin vilently.

“Opposin thy elevation,” sed he, addressin the
dead nigger, “wunst made a marter uv me, wich
marterdom netted me $30,000 in ten-cent pieces,
wich I immejitly invested in 7-30 bonds issued by
a tyranikle and onconstooshnal guverment. By
carryin a portrait uv thee, and exhibitin it at my
meetins in the rooral deestricks, I hev made my
constitooencies bile with rage, at the ijee uv sich ez
thou bein elevatid to their speer. Like Othello,
`my okkepashun's gone.' Farewell, pollytix—
thou wast my pollytix. Farewell, Congris!—uv
wat yoose is a Dimekrat in Congris with no nigger
to blat about? Farewell, life!—for wat is life
with no nigger to persekoot?”

And takin the jack-knife from Peerse's hand,
he recklessly plunged it into his bowils, and fell
across Peerse.

Brite, uv Injeany; Richardson, uv Illinoy; Seymour,
uv Noo York; Florence, uv Pennsilvany,
and all the leeders uv the party uv the North,
without exception, cum up, and, makin similar
orashuns, used the jack-knife in like style—fallin
across each other ez four-foot wood is corded.
Ginral Slocum, uv Noo York, hed a good mind to

do the same thing; but he conclooded he cood turn
a somerset out uv the party ez easy ez he somersetted
into it, and he did n't.

Filled with anguish uv the heaviest descripshun,
and fully appreciatin the feelins uv the
noble men who woodent survive their party, I
caught the jack-knife, and, throwin myself into a
attitood—sich ez I hev seen Forist cum, when, in
Otheller, he stabs hisself—I wuz on the pint uv
makin it acqwaintid with my intestines, when I
happened to observe a quart-bottle stickin out uv
the nigger's coat-pockit. Droppin the knife, I
seezed it, and in 2 gulps swallered the contents.
The room spun round and round, and, eggsaustid,
I fell senseless across the dead sooisides. Jest
then, Horis Greely entered the room. Holdin up
both hands, he exclaimed:

“Ez it wuz in the beginnin, so it is in the endin.
Behold Dimokrasy!—nigger at the bottom, and
whisky at the top. We 're rid uv two great
cusses to wunst!”

And, instid uv punchin his stumick with the
knife, he shuffled out uv the room, holdin his
nose.

I awoke, in a feverish sweat, shreekin wildly.
So vivid wuz the scene I hed dreemed, that I

found it impossible to sleep, and all that long nite
I walked the flore in agony.

Wuz the dreem profetik? Is there any danger
uv the nigger becumin extinct by disease? I
know amalgamashun is whitenin him in the Suthern
States, but up North, where Dimokrasy is
skarse, we kin preserve them in all their original
blackness. Hevin grant that this friteful vision
wuz simply the result uv a disordered stumick,
and not a warnin uv wrath to cum!