University of Virginia Library

16. LETTER XVI.

Trouble in the Cabinet—The use of Vacancies—Amos
in a Panic—Mr. Van Buren's Nature and Prospects
—A Rat among the Barrels.

My last letter to you tell'd you about that
'ere scuffle I had among some of our folks
down stairs; and do you know it has been nigh
bringing war among us. Mr. Van Buren
came down here all in a lather about it. He
was plaguy fraid there would be more voluntary
dismissals; and he says it won't do to
have too many of them all at once, or the folks
about the country will begin to think that we
ain't units. Some on 'em did try, I suspect,
to make muddy water between me and the
Gineral; for one day when I was busy doin up
some writin for the Gineral, he was called out,
and had a long talk with Mr. Van Buren and
Amos Kindle, and some more on 'em; and
when he came back, says he, `Major, I wish
you and I was at the Hermitage.' `Why,'

says I, `how so, Gineral?' `Well, I don't
know exactly why,' says he, `but I don't see,'
says he, `what use there is in my bein here,
for things are gittin now so mixed up, that I
can't tell exactly what is best to do to get Mr.
Van Buren in. Do you know, Major,' says
he, `that Mr. Van Buren says he don't think
it was right to move the deposits.' `Why how
you talk!' says I. `Didn't he advise it?'
`Well, so I thought,' says the Gineral; `but
he says it would be best only to hold it up by
the tail, as you do a fox, and keep all the dogs
barking for it; for as soon as you throw the
fox in the crowd, a few old Jowlers grab hold,
and the rest don't git a mouthfull; and then
comes trouble.'

`Well,' says I, `Gineral, that's true enuff,
and that's jest the way we are doin now with
the minister to England, and some other appointments;
we must keep the folks smellin
round, and one vacancy to fill,' says I, `is
worth a dozen filled up.' `But, Major, that
ain't the worst trouble now,' says the Gineral;
and he got up, and stomped about, and then
came back and filled his pipe, and stomped
about agin, without lightin it. I see there was
trouble brewin. Says he, `Major, I don't care

so much about it myself; but they say you
must make Amos Kindle an apology for that
blow you aimed at him tother night.' And
with that I riz right up, and walked straight
up chamber, and put on my rigementals, and
my cocked hat, and hooked on my sword, and
went strait down stairs to Amos. `Here,'
says I, `Mister, the Gineral says you want to
say somethin to me.' `O no, Major,' says he,
`there must be some mistake.' `Well then,'
says I, `it is that you want me to say somethin
to you.' `Ono,' says he, `that's a greater
mistake.' I looked at him for about a minit;
and he shook like a North Carolina ague.
Says he, `Major, I suspect the Gineral meant
you to look over with me a statement I am
gittin up, showing how much mony Mr. Clay
has received of the Bank; it is almost done,'
says he, `and I'll bring it up for you and the
Gineral, and Mr. Van Buren to see.' `Very
well,' says I, `that's enuff.' And back I went
to the Gineral; and as soon as I got in front
of him, I stopped. `Now,' says I, `Gineral,
what was that you was sayin a while ago that
you wanted me to do?' The Gineral was
stumped; he looked at me a spell, and says
he, `Major, I reckon I've forgot it; and suppose
we say no more about it.' And jest then
in came Mr. Van Buren, and shortly after Amos
came in, and we all sot down, and began to
figer up the 'counts that our little District
Attorney had been sendin to Amos Kindle,
about the money the Bank had paid to Mr.
Clay for his sarvices from the time Mr. Cheves
employed him to sue the folks away West
there, when the Bank closed up one of its
branches. And it figers up pretty considerable.
And Amos has got it so fixed, that it
looks for all the world like `bribery and corruption;'
and we are comin out with it, and
a good deal more too; and if it dont't kill
Clay, I'm mistaken.

The Gineral is as wrathy as thunder about
Clay's journey north, and Mr. Van Buren
don't like it a bit nother. But the Gineral tells
Mr. Van Buren, if so be that the folks north
and south, and all about creation, take a notion
to Mr. Clay, and think he would make a
better President than Mr. Van Buren,—then
he, the Gineral, will hold on for a 3d heat;
and that's about my notion too. Mr. Van Buren
would stand a good chance in a race,
when a good many are runnin, and if the
ground is muddy and slippery; for he is a

master hand at trippin folks. But I'm afraid
he'd stand a slim chance over a clear field.
And it ain't fair to make him run so. Any
man can catch a rat in a strait race, because
he ain't used to it; but give him a few old
barrels and logs to dodge round, then, I tell
you, it's pretty tuff work.

I hain't had a letter from Zekel Bigelow for
some time. I raly begin to think that crittur
has left Wall-street, and gone East with Mr.
Clay—can you find out, and let me know?