University of Virginia Library

FUN IN WASHINGTON, OHIO.

In Washington they tell a story about Ralph Johnson,
who became alarmed when the ladies came and
prayed in his saloon. The next day Ralph went to the
ladies almost broken-hearted, and said if he could only
get rid of five barrels of whiskey which he then had
on hand he would join the temperance cause himself.

“We will buy your poisonous whiskey, and pay you
for it,” said the ladies.

“All right,” said Ralph, and he took $300 and rolled
the whiskey out. The ladies emptied the whiskey into
the street. Ralph joined the cause for one day, and
then went to Lynchburg, where they have 11,000 barrels
of proof whiskey in store, and bought a new lot.

“What do you mean by doing this, Mr. Johnson?”
asked a deacon of the church.

“Well,” replied Ralph, “my customers war a kinder

partic'lar like, and that thar old whiskey was so dog-on
weak that I could not sell it to 'em no how; but it
didn't hurt the ladies, for it was just as good as the
best proof whiskey to wash down the gutters with.”