University of Virginia Library

LETTER IV.

Dear Nephew, — I left home just after your letter to
your cousin Ephraim got there, and I didn't get a sight
of your letter to me that you put into the Courier at
Portland, until I saw it in the Daily Advertiser in Boston,
and I guess Mr Hale is the only person in Boston who
takes that are little Courier, so you was pretty safe
about the letter not being seen, as the printer promised
you. — How I happened to see it here, you will find out
before I have got through with this letter. I guess you
wont be a little struck up when you find out that I'm in
Boston — but I had best begin at the beginning and then
I shall get thro' quicker.

After seeing your letter to Ephraim as I said before,
I concluded it wouldn't be a bad scheme to tackle up
and take a load of turkies, some apple-sauce, and other
notions that the neighbors wanted to get to market, and
as your uncle Nat would be in Boston with the ax handles,
we all thought best to try our luck there. Nothing
happened worth mentioning on the road, nor till next
morning after I got here and put up in Elm street. I
then got off my watch pretty curiously, as you shall be

informed. I was down in the bar room, and tho't it well
enough to look pretty considerable smart, and now and
then compared my watch with the clock in the bar,
and found it as near right as ever it was — when a feller
stept up to me and ask'd how I'd trade? and says I, for
what? and says he, for your watch — and says I, any
way that will be a fair shake — upon that says he, I'll
give you my watch and five dollars. — Says I, its done!
He gave me the five dollars, and I gave him my watch.
Now, says I, give me your watch — and, says he, with a
loud laugh, I han't got none — and that kind aturn'd
the laugh on me. Thinks I, let them laugh that lose.
Soon as the laugh was well over, the feller thought he'd
try the watch to his ear — why, says he, it dont go —
no, says I, not without its carried — then I began to
laugh — he tried to open it and couldn't start it a hair,
and broke his thumb nail into the bargain. Won't she
open, says he? Not's I know on, says I — and then the
laugh seemed to take another turn.

Don't you think I got off the old Brittania pretty well,
considrin? And then I thought I'd go and see about
my load of turkies and other notions. I expected to
have gone all over town to sell my load, but Mr Doolittle
told me if I'd go down to the new market, I should
find folks enough to buy all I had at once. So down I
goes, and a likely kind of a feller, with an eye like a
hawk and quick as a steeltrap for a trade, (they called
him a 4th staller,) came up to the wagon, and before
you could say Jack Robinson, we struck a bargain for
the whole cargo — and come to weigh and reckon up, I
found I should get as much as 10s6d more than any of
us calculated before I left home, and had the apple-sauce
left besides. So I thought I'd jist see how this
4th staller worked his card to be able to give us so good
a price for the turkies, and I went inside the market-house,
and a grander sight I never expect to see! But
it was the 3d staller, instead of the 4th, had my turkies

all sorted and hung up, and looking so much better that
I hardly should known 'em. Pretty soon, a gentleman
asked the 3d staller what he asked for turkies? Why,
says he, if you want something better than you ever saw
before, there's some 'twas killed last night purpose for
you. You may take 'em at 9d, being it's you. I'll give
you 12 cents, said the gentleman, as I've got some of
the General Court to dine with me, and must treat well.
I shant stand for half a cent with an old customer, says
he. And so they traded; and in about the space of half
an hour or more, all my turkies went into baskets at that
rate. The 4th staller gave me 6d a pound, and I began
to think I'd been a little too much in a hurry for trade —
but's no use to cry for spilt milk. Then I went up to the
State House to see what was going on there; but I
thought I'd get off my apple-sauce on my way — and
seeing a sign of old clothes bartered, I stepped in and
made a trade, and got a whole suit of superfine black
broadcloth from from top to toe, for a firkin of apple-sauce,
(which didn't cost much I guess, at home.)

Accordingly I rigged myself up in the new suit, and
you 'd hardly known me. I did n't like the set of the
shoulders, they were so dreadful puckery; but the man
said that was all right. I guess he 'll find the apple
sauce full as puckery when he gets down into it — but
that 's between ourselves. Well, when I got up to the
State House I found them at work on the rail road —
busy enough I can tell you — they got a part of it made
already. I found most all the folks kept their hats on
except the man who was talking out loud and the man
he was talking to — all the rest seemed to be busy about
their own consarns. As I did n't see any body to talk to
I kept my hat on and took a seat, and look'd round to
see what was going on. I had n't been setting long
before I saw a slick-headed, sharp-eyed little man,
who seemed to have the principal management of the
folks, looking at me prety sharp, as much as to say who

are you? but I said nothing and looked tother way — at
last he touched me on the shoulder — I thought he was
feeling of the puckers. Are you a member? says he—
sartin says I — how long have you taken your seat?
says he. About ten minutes, says I. Are you qualified?
says he. I guess not, says I. And then he left me. I
did n't know exactly what this old gentleman was after
— but soon he returned and said it was proper for me
to be qualified before I took a seat, and I must go before
the governor! By Jing! I never felt so before in all my
born days. As good luck would have it, he was beckoned
to come to a man at the desk, and as soon as his back
was turned I give him the slip. Jest as I was going off,
the gentleman who bought my turkies of the 4th staller
took hold of my arm, and I was afraid at first that he
was going to carry me to the Governor — but he began
to talk as sociable as if we had been old acquaintances.
How long have you been in the house, Mr Smith, says
he. My name is Downing, said I. I beg your pardon,
says he — I mean Downing. It 's no offence, says I, I
hav'nt been here long. Then says he in a very pleasan
way, a few of your brother members are to take pot-luck
with me to day, and I should be happy to have you join
them. What 's pot-luck said I. O, a family dinner,
says he — no ceremony. I thought by this time I was
well qualified for that without going to the Governor.
So says I, yes, and thank ye too. How long before
you 'll want me, says I. At 3 o'clock, says he, and gave
me a piece of paste board with his name on it — and
the name of the street, and the number of his house,
and said that would show me the way. Well, says I, I
dont know of nothing that will keep me away. And
then we parted. I took considerable liking to him.

After strolling round and seeing a great many things
about the State House and the marble immage of Gin.
Washington, standing on a stump in the Porch, I went
out into the street they call Bacon street, and my stars!

what swarms of women folks I saw all drest up as if
they were going to meeting. You can tell cousin Polly
Sandburn, who you know is no slimster, that she
need n't take on so about being genteel in her shapes —
for the genteelest ladies here beat her as to size all hollow.
I dont believe one of 'em could get into our fore
dore — and as for their arms — I should n't want better
measure for a bushel of meal than one of their sleeves
could hold. I shant shell out the bushel of corn you say
I 've lost on Speaker Ruggles at that rate. But this
puts me in mind of the dinner which Mr. — wants
I should help the Gineral Court eat. So I took out the
piece of paste board, and began to inquire my way and
got along completely, and found the number the first
time — but the door was locked, and there was no
knocker, and I thumpt with my whip handle, but nobody
come. And says I to a man going by, dont nobody live
here? and says he yes. Well, how do you get in? Why,
says he, ring; and says I, ring what? And says he, the
bell. And says I where 's the rope? And says he, pull
that little brass nub; and so I gave it a twitch, and I 'm
sure a bell did ring; and who do you think opened the
door with a white apron afore him? You could n't
guess for a week a Sundays — so I 'll tell you. It was
Stephen Furlong, who kept our district school last winter,
for 5 dollars a month, and kept bachelor's hall, and
helped tend for Gineral Coombs a training days, and
make out muster rolls. We was considerably struck up
at first, both of us; and when he found I was going to
eat dinner with Mr. — and Gineral Court, he
thought it queer kind of doings — but says he, I guess
it will be as well for both of us not to know each other
a bit more than we can help. And says I, with a wink,
you 're half right, and in I went. There was nobody
in the room but Mr. — and his wife, and not a sign
of any dinner to be seen any where — though I thought
now and then when a side door opened, I could smell
cupboard, as they say.

I thought I should be puzzled enough to know what
to say, but I had 'nt my thoughts long to myself. Mr
— has about as nimble a tongue as you ever heard,
and could say ten words to my one, and I had nothing
to do in the way of making talk. Just then I heard a
ringing, and Stephen was busy opening the door and
letting in the Gineral Court, who all had their hats off,
and looking pretty scrumptious, you may depend. I
did 'nt see but I could stand along side of 'em without
disparagement, except to my boots, which had just got
a lick of beeswax and tallow — not a mite of dinner yet,
and I began to feel as if 'twas nearer supper-time than
dinner-time — when all at once two doors flew away
from each other right into the wall, and what did I see
but one of the grandest thanksgiving dinners you ever
laid your eyes on — and lights on the table, and silver
candlesticks and gold lamps over head — the window
shutters closed — I guess more than one of us stared at
first, but we soon found the way to our mouths — I made
Stephen tend out for me pretty sharp, and he got my
plate filled three or four times with soup, which beat all
I ever tasted. I shan't go through the whole dinner
again to you — but I am mistaken if it cost me much
for victuals this week, if I pay by the meal at Mr Doolittle's,
who comes pretty near up to a thanksgiving
every day. There was considerable talk about stock
and manufactories, and lier bilities, and rimidies, and a
great loss on stock. I thought this a good chance for
me to put in a word — for I calculated I knew as much
about raising stock and keeping over as any of 'em.
Says I to Mr —, there's one thing I've always observed
in my experience in stock — just as sure as you
try to keep over more stock than you have fodder to
carry them well into April, one half will die on your
hands, to a sartinty — and there's no remedy for it —

I've tried it out and out, and there's no law that can
make a ton of hay keep over ten cows, unless you have
more carrots and potatoes than you can throw a stick
at. This made some of the folks stare who did 'nt know
much about stock — and Steve give me a jog, as much
as to say, keep quiet. He thought I was getting into a
quog-mire, and soon after, giving me a wink, opened the
door and got me out of the room into the entry.

After we had got out of hearing, says I to Steve, how
are you getting on in the world — should you like to
come back to keep our school if I could get a vote for
you? — not by two chalks says Steve — I know which
side my bread is buttered better than all that — I get 12
dollars a month and found, and now and then some old
clothes, which is better than keeping school at 5 dollars
and find myself and work out my highway tax besides
— then turning up the cape of my new coat, says he, I
guess I've dusted that before now — most likely, says I,
but not in our district school. And this brings to mind
to tell you how I got a sight of your letter. They tell
me here that every body reads the Boston Daily Advertiser,
because there is no knowing but what they may
find out something to their advantage, so I thought I
would be as wise as the rest of them, and before I got
half through with it, what should I find mixed up among
the news but your letter that you put into that little
paper down in Portland, and I knew it was your writing
before I had read ten lines of it.

I hope I've answered it to your satisfaction.