15. CHAPTER XV.
WIRY WILLY'S STRANGE ADVENTURE.
When Wiry Willy and his pony fell into the chasm, they
were so completely buried in the leaves which had been
wafted thither by the winds of autumn, that neither were
perceived by the hundred horsemen who passed over their
prostrate bodies. And when Willy, extricating himself from
his pony, endeavored to rise on his feet, he was clasped in
the arms of a powerful man, and all attempts at resistance
were utterly vain.
“I've got him, Sergeant,” said the gigantic man who had
seized Willy. “Now do you hug the horse, so's not to
make any noise.”
“I'm on him, Captain,” said the Sergeant, embracing the
neck of the pony as he lay in the leaves; “but he bites like
the —!”
“Never mind that—but hold him. My man here is as
gentle as a lamb.”
“I make no resistance, gentlemen,” said Wiry Willy,
“because I feel you have me in your power. But why am
I thus used? I don't think I ever injured either of you. I
am no man's enemy.”
“And he asks why he's thus used in battle! And then
he says he's no man's enemy, when he's fighting! Lord, if
our powder hadn't given out! Stranger, my sword flew
off its handle the very first blow, and I've nothing left to
fight with but my hands, and nobody to follow me but the
Sergeant. They peppered every man of my company, of
upwards of a hundred, except the Sergeant, there. And
so we two retreated into this place, resolved to sell our lives
as dearly as we could.”
“But, gentlemen, as I don't want your lives, I think you
might release me.”
“No, sir! We want to surrender to you, and save our
own lives.”
“Surrender to me!” said Willy in amazement.
“Yes, sir! And if we were to let you escape, the next
squad of the enemy might blow our brains out.”
“But which army do you belong to?” demanded Willy.
“We fought under General Ruffleton, because he pledged
us there should be plenty of fighting.”
“And for my part,” said the Sergeant, “I have had about
enough. And many others are sick enough of it.”
“Oh, if you come to that,” said the Captain, “there are
plenty of 'em dead of it. But see here, stranger, which
side are you on?”
“I'm a private in General Ruffleton's army,” said Willy.
“Then our cake's all dough,” said the Captain, in disappointment.
“He may be lying,” said the Sergeant. “Question him.”
“In whose company, sir?”
“Captain Bim's.”
“What? Well, that must be a lie!”
“Stop!” cried the Sergeant, springing up from the pony.
“What's your name? Here's my book. I saved it,
Captain, though all the men in it's lost.”
“William Wire.”
“By the smoking nostrils of the dragon!” cried Captain
Bim, “it is Wiry Willy!” and he turned Willy around and
embraced him.
“And give me your hand, comrade!” cried the Sergeant,
joining them. “Don't you recollect Sergeant Punt? See,
here's your name writ in my book by gas-light. But how
can we surrender to you?”
“I'll arrange it,” said Willy. “I belong to all three of
the armies. Jack Bim, have you spent your money?”
“Every coin in the world, except that—you know
where.”
“Then here, take mine. It was this gold that pitched
me into the ditch. It was the last feather that broke my
pony's back.”
“I'll take a few pieces, Willy—but not all. If it was
unfortunate for you, it was lucky for us. I got you out of
prison, and you're bound to clear me of this scrape.”
“That's true, Jack. Follow me. I'll walk with you and
lead the pony. Come along, Sergeant Punt.”
They succeeded, after some labor, in extricating the pony,
and then Willy directed his steps towards the eminence
lately in possession of the President and his fine cavalry.
But they had not proceeded more than a mile before Sergeant
Punt, who had been silent while the others conversed
incessantly, came to a sudden halt.
“Gentlemen,” said he, “I intend to give up fighting, and
go to work. I'm a ship carpenter by trade. I've got a wife
and three children in Philadelphia, and I'm getting homesick.
If I go any further with you, I may fall into the
hands of General Crook, and what'll become of me then?”
“You're a fool, Punt!” said Bim, contemptuously.
“He'd release you on parole, and then you might join
your wife. But if you were to go to her without binding
yourself not to serve again, what'd become of you if you
fell into the hands of Ruffleton? Why, he'd shoot you as
a deserter.”
“That would be worse than all,” said the Sergeant, going
forward again. “But, Willy, wouldn't General Crook
take me into his service?”
“General Crook will not enlist Northern men,” said
Willy.
“That's a mistake,” said Bim, “for I fought under him
once.”
“Then,” said the Sergeant, “won't he shoot you as a
deserter?”
“I never thought of that!” said Bim, pausing.
“Never fear,” said Willy. “I'll arrange everything for
you both. On my recommendation the President will take
you into his service. He has a regular army, and millions
of money.”
“Do you think there'll be any fighting?” asked Bim.
“After a while—abundance of it.”
“Then I'm in, if he wants a real man! And when we
have the first battle, I can say I've fought on all sides.
And you, Willy, who have been on all sides, have fought on
none.”
“The Bible says thou shalt not kill,” said Willy.
“But ain't there a sight of fighting in the Bible?” asked
Bim.
Willy acknowledged there was. He believed the President
was right, however, in his endeavors to save the
Union.
“But where are all the niggers?” asked Punt, suddenly,
after being silent again for many minutes.
“They have been taken to the other side of the Potomac,”
said Willy. “They make them work on the fortifications.”
“Ruffleton deceived me,” said Punt. “He said I might
get rich catching niggers, and that they were as plenty as
crows in Jersey, and every one I caught would sell for a
thousand dollars.”
“Punt, they called you an abolitionist at home,” said
Bim.
“I know it. I said I was one. But I was electioneering
for votes. I confess I never knew anything about the right
or wrong of holding such property; and I made up my
mind to catch a few and sell 'em for a thousand dollars
apiece.”
In this manner they discussed their own affairs and the
affairs of the nation, until they arrived before the President,
in the great East Room of the Executive Mansion.
“Whom have you here, Will?” demanded the President.
“Two prisoners, sir.”
“Prisoners? You had no authority to take prisoners.
I want no prisoners.”
“He'll put us to the sword, I'm afraid,” whispered Punt.
“But he couldn't help taking us, sir,” said Bim, “because
we seized him, and—
“Seized him, and became his prisoners. Explain this
matter, Will,” said the President, with impatience.
Willy easily made him comprehend everything.
“Bim,” said the President, “will you enrol among the
militia? I have no authority to increase the regular army,
in the absence of Congress.”
“Wiry Willy,” said Bim, casting a ferocious glance at the
one addressed, “you have deceived me. You said I could
get into the regular army. No, sir, I can't join the militia
—I want to be where fighting is done.”
“Is that it?” said the President, smiling.
“Yes, sir, that's it. And I thought from the looks of your
soldiers as we came here, that you had been increasing the
regular army.”
“Militia, nearly all militia, Bim. But they are trained to
fight, and no doubt there will be abundance of fighting.”
“That's enough, sir,” said Bim, comprehending the President.
“I'll enrol, sir. And if fighting can bring promotion,
I'll
rise.”
“And you, sir,” said the President, turning to Punt.
“I'm a ship carpenter by trade, sir; and from what I've
seen in this campaign, I think I'd rather work with my
adze.”
“Very good, sir. I must have a militia navy as well
as a militia army. Conduct them to General Valiant,
Will, and then hasten to Georgetown.” Saying this, the
President turned away and resumed his contemplative exercises.
“By George, Willy!” said Bim, as they withdrew, “I
didn't think you were on such intimate terms with the President.
His eyes command as well as his words. He's the
leader for me! I'll never change sides again.”
