University of Virginia Library

W

WAGNER, Dick, a Dutchman who wrote a few sheets of music, went into the opera business, but died before the good singers or Hammerstein prices appeared.

WALKER, Johnnie, 1820. Spent most of his life at your favorite bar until you appeared.

WALTON, Isaac, he was the fellow who started those awful fish stories.

WASHINGTON, George, child model, father, etc. Spent early days chopping trees, holding conversations with his father, killing Indians, and being brave. Later he drove those tea-selling Englishmen from the United States, said farewell to his troops, and became a politician. W. decided he was not good enough for a third term and retired. His picture has been widely distributed. Ambition: To be the happy father of a big Uncle Sam. Recreation: Powdering his wig. Address: Washington. Clubs: Anti-Ananias.

WASHINGTON, Booker T., only a distant relation of the above. A big black man who went about the country raising money to put brains into ivory. He also told his audience how unfortunate they were in not being coons. (See Uncle Tom.)

WATSON, Doctor. He boswelled Sherlock Holmes.

WEBSTER, Dan., an American statesman and

a member of Congress before the invention of investigating committees. He died famous.

WEBSTER, Noah, speller, writer, reference-book maker, and language itemizer. W. was the man to whom Mark Twain paid a glowing tribute by saying he was a great writer, but his stories were too short.

WELLINGTON, Duke of, an Englishman who taught a great French general to say "Tout est perdu.'' He later taught England that many a good soldier makes a poor politician.

WHITEHEAD, of Fiume, Austria. Mission in life was to reduce the size of dreadnaughts.

WHITTINGTON, Richard, proprietor of a celebrated back-fence walker.

WIDOW, Merry, a dream who hung around Mr. Maxim's restaurant in Paris, made love to nobility, toured the world, and finally died. Death was caused by overexertion. Before the war she was engaged to a Balkan prince. W. visited New York, London, and Paris. Everybody fell in love with her and whistled her praises. Past: (?) Press Agent: Frank Lehar. Ambition: Millionaires. Recreation: After 11.45 P. M. Epitaph: When Will There Be Another Like Her?

WIGGS, Mrs., a woman who successfully advertised cabbages.

WILLIAMS. He was the man who ruined the shaving-mug business.

WILSON, Puddin' Head, a young lawyer who

"W. Wilson"

[Description: Wilson in cap and gown standing over an open grave.]

blank page was fathered by Mark Twian. No relation to the following.

WILSON, Woodrow, one time president of an American football, educational institution, who outgrew his job. He moved up to be governor, made a few cure-all speeches, introduced Roosevelt to Bryan, changed his address to Washington. Took out a watchful, waiting policy. Is now in Who's Who, but whether he will remain in that publication or this one cannot be determined at the time of going to press. Ambition: To keep Roosevelt and Bryan running. Recreation: Teaching, Browning, other brain exercises, thinking, Congress. Address: Washington, care Joseph Tumulty. Clubs: Pedagogue, Mexican.

WINSLOW, Mrs., known over the world as the lady who soothes the baby's little tummie.

WONDERLAND, Alice of, traveless discoveress. Made a lady of the Royal Geographical Society. She was a great favorite of the children and many grown ups. She always will remain a Who's Whoess.

WOOLSEY, Cardinal, a churchman who combined politics with his profession, became wealthy, unfortunate, and was finally written up by Shakespeare.

WRIGHT, Orville, one of the inventors of the aeroplane who knows the inside of the business, and believes one life on the ground is worth two in the air.