University of Virginia Library

M

McGINTY, a celebrated Irish diver.

McGRAW, John J., Manager of the New York Baseball organization, frequently used by the Philadelphia Athletics to gain the world's championship.

MACBETH, Lady, a royal somnambulist.

MACKINTOSH, discoverer of a method of keeping dry outside on a rainy day.

MAGELLAN, the man who got into straits and straights.

MAN, Sand, an old fellow who visits houses blessed with a child. Only calls after supper. Tells the little one he has played enough for the day, and sprinkles some sand in his eyes. When M. departs the little bundle is asleep in the nursery or all cuddled up in Mother's lap. Ambition: Sand for the older folks.

MANUEL, King, of England, and late of Portugal. Introduced Parisian life into Lisbon. Was a very sweet and very wise young man. Overlooked the fact that a king may rule a nation, but frequently is a poor press agent. Became incensed at his army and subjects. Moved in haste. Ambition: Lisbon and a dancing queen. Recreation: Watch bill-boards. Address: Watch bill-boards. Clubs: Down and Out. Epitaph: A Manuel And His Kingdom Are Soon Parted.

MARAT, one of the fathers of the French Revolution, who could rule a city, but not a woman.

MARCEL, Madame, of France. Discovered a good excuse for women to gaze in mirrors. Also caused heartfailure on a rainy day.

MARCONI, Guglielmo, the man who made the inventors of telegraph poles and wires look foolish. His inventions have made it possible for New York stock brokers to continue their business while journeying to Paris.

MARINER, A., traveler, albatross raiser. Gathered fame by making a voyage with some dead ones. His feat has frequently been duplicated on liners out of the regular tourist season.

MARK, Saint, of Venice. Guarded the pigeons of his square and the tourist who dwelt within his canals.

MARTINI, manufacturer of an American before-dinner drink which tastes too good.

MARY, a young girl who was presented with a famous lamb. Seldom was seen without the animal. Conveyed it to school with her one day, thus causing considerable mirth among the pupils. Was severely reprimanded by the teacher, as it was against the regulations of the institution to permit animals, other than the children, in the class-rooms. M. returned the lamb to the stable. Her biography has been extensively published.

MATERLINCK, a Belgian who believed the best way to get "copy'' about himself into the newspapers was to try to keep it out. Recreation: Bluebird raising.

MAXIM, patron saint of the American-English tourist in Paris, who introduced New York prices into a naughty café. When a young man he discovered that the tourists were not paying enough money to see the sights. With the assistance of some handsomely gowned women he opened a café on the Rue Royal where they could. For years it was patronized by his countrymen until they were ruined. Later only royalty and tourists were permitted to enter and form a mistaken idea of the real French café, pay double prices for everything, see a few chorus girls, hear champagne bottles, and talk to English-speaking waiters. Ambition: Americans. Recreation: Staying at home. Press Agent: The Merry Widow and the Girl from Maxims. Epitaph: Honi Soit Qui Mal y Pense.

MAXIM, no relation of the above, as he only manufactured things to kill people, and not to financially ruin them.

MEDICI, Katie, an Italian French woman whose past was uncovered by those historians. Was fond of poison, but did not care for Methodists or Presbyterians.

MEDUSA, a celebrated ancient who had the delirium tremens in an acute stage.

MELLIN, he was the man who tried to cheat the baby out of the bottle.

MENDELSSOHN, wrote a tune which is usually played when a man goes to his fate.

MENNEN, the manufacturer of a baby and good complexion perquisite. Nothing like it for your face after shaving. His picture has been widely distributed, but never admired.

MERCURY, errand boy for the gods. Wore a pair of winged feet and feathers in his hat. Was also an artist's model. Ambition: A telegraph. Recreation: Same as the gods. Address: General delivery.

METHUSELAH, an ancient who was not like one in a thousand.

MICHEL, Saint, he kicked the devil out of paradise, and was instantly made the patron saint of France.

MIKE, Pat's partner (see Pat).

MILTON, John, wrote a Dante book, the title of which is known by everybody and the contents by few.

MOËT and CHANDON, two competitors of Mr. Mumm who did much to bring the price of champagne to within the reach of millionaires.

MOHAMMED, inventor of the harem, and the man who introduced mormonism into Arabia. (See B. Young.) Also manufactured crescents, religion, and made Mecca the mecca for everything. Early life spent in business. This did not pay. He then married a widow and retired. Took up religion as a hobby. Became a professional. Found the sword was mightier than his kin. His salvation army was successful. His prisoners were given the alternative of a finely tempered, beautifully

inlaid damascus blade or Islam. They always became fervently religious. Later M. embarked on a marrying campaign with equal success. Publications: The Koran, a treatise on everything. Ambition: The crescent on every flag. Recreation: Walking toward mountains; stroking his beard. Address: 23 Blvd. Allah, Mecca, Arabia. Epitaph: A Man's Works Take After Him.

MOLIERE, Jean B. P., a French author who wrote a few plays we do not have to see alone.

MONROE, James, the founder of a doctrine, the practicability of which nations desire to learn, and yet do not wish to make the test.

MORSE, Samuel G., an inventor who might have used his talents in other lines had Marconi lived before his time.

MOSES, whose whereabouts in the dark has puzzled all generations. Born in the bullrushes of Egypt. Entered politics as the son of Pharaoh's daughter and the leader of the Ghetto. When M. waxed astute, after the manner of his people, he discovered there were not sufficient shekels for himself and countrymen in the land of Egypt. He pleaded and plagued the king for permission to close the pawn shops and clothing stores. Now in those days the children of Egypt were wont to patronize the bazaars of the children of the Chosen, and Pharaoh was wroth within himself and refused the passports. The brave rabbi closed the kosher meat stores and took ship's leave. Adopting an

original compass, he made forced marches to the Red Sea. Here the synagogue was overtaken by Pharaoh and his army. M. spilled the sea on them and marched on. From this time the journey to the Promised Land was slow. Whether this was due to good business or sore feet history does not relate. M. later climbed a mountain and received the ten commandments. After breaking them he returned to camp. He died before the journey was complete. Publications: Histories. Ambition: A railroad from Cairo to Jerusalem. Recreation: Tennis and camel racing. Also enjoyed tent life. Address: Care of Jewish Legation.

MOSES, Holy, no relation of the above. He was the fellow who came around when you hit your finger with the hammer.

MULLER, Maud, one of the few country girls who never went to New York City.

MUMM, [7] the man who made the most expensive drink on earth. The products of his cellars are frequently purchased by persons who cannot afford them. They form one of the principal ingredients of a good time (see Paris).

MUNCHAUSEN, Baron, traveler, explorer. While many of his books, lectures, and newspaper interviews have been questioned by scientific men, he is held in high regard due to his failure to claim the discovery of the north pole.

MUNYON, Doctor, an American herb doctor and optimist. Held the theory that while there was life there was a chance to sell some of his medicine.

MURPHY, Charles J. See What's Who of New York City.