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Science vs. Luck.
AT that time, in Kentucky (said the Hon. Mr. K—), the law was
very strict against what is termed “games of chance.” About a
dozen of the boys were detected playing “seven-up” or “old sledge”
for money, and the grand jury found a true bill against them. Jim
Sturgis was retained to defend them when the case came up, of course. The more
he studied over the matter, and looked into the evidence, the plainer it was that he
must lose a case at last—there was no getting around that painful fact. Those
boys had certainly been betting money on a game of chance. Even public sympathy
was roused in behalf of Sturgis. People said it was a pity to see him mar his
successful career with a big prominent case like this, which must go against him.
But after several restless nights an inspired idea flashed upon Sturgis, and he
sprang out of bed delighted. He thought he saw his way through. The next day
he whispered around a little among his clients and a few friends, and then when
the case came up in court he acknowledged the seven-up and the betting, and, as
his sole defence, had the astounding effrontery to put in the plea that old sledge
was not a game of chance! There was the broadest sort of a smile all over the
faces of that sophisticated audience. The judge smiled with the rest. But Sturgis
maintained a countenance whose earnestness was even severe. The opposite
counsel tried to ridicule him out of his position, and did not succeed. The judge
jested in a ponderous judicial way about the thing, but did not move him. The
matter was becoming grave. The judge lost a little of his patience, and said the
joke had gone far enough. Jim Sturgis said he knew of no joke in the matter—his
a game of chance until it was proven that it was a game of chance. Judge and
counsel said that would be an easy matter, and forthwith called Deacons Job,
Peters, Burke, and Johnson, and Dominies Wirt and Miggles, to testify; and they
unanimously and with strong feeling put down the legal quibble of Sturgis by pronouncing
that old sledge was a game of chance.
“What do you call it now?” said the judge.
“I call it a game of science!” retorted Sturgis; “and I'll prove it, too!”
They saw his little game.
He brought in a cloud of witnesses, and produced an overwhelming mass of
testimony, to show that old sledge was not a game of chance but a game of
science.
Instead of being the simplest case in the world, it had somehow turned out to be
an excessively knotty one. The judge scratched his head over it a while, and said
there was no way of coming to a determination, because just as many men could
be brought into court who would testify on one side as could be found to testify on
the other. But he said he was willing to do the fair thing by all parties, and
would act upon any suggestion Mr. Sturgis would make for the solution of the
difficulty.
Mr. Sturgis was on his feet in a second.
“Impanel a jury of six of each, Luck versus Science. Give them candles and a
couple of decks of cards. Send them into the jury room, and just abide by the
result!”
There was no disputing the fairness of the proposition. The four deacons and
the two dominies were sworn in as the “chance” jurymen, and six inveterate old
seven-up professors were chosen to represent the “science” side of the issue
They retired to the jury room.
In about two hours Deacon Peters sent into court to borrow three dollars from a
friend. [Sensation.] In about two hours more Dominie Miggles sent into court
to borrow a “stake” from a friend. [Sensation.] During the next three or four
hours the other dominie and the other deacons sent into court for small loans.
And still the packed audience waited, for it was a prodigious occasion in
interested.
The rest of the story can be told briefly. About daylight the jury came in, and
Deacon Job, the foreman, read the following
VERDICT.
We, the jury in the case of the Commonwealth of Kentucky vs. John Wheeler et
al., have carefully considered the points of the case, and tested the merits of the
several theories advanced, and do hereby unanimously decide that the game commonly
known as old sledge or seven-up is eminently a game of science and not of
chance. In demonstration whereof it is hereby and herein stated, iterated,
reiterated, set forth, and made manifest that, during the entire night, the “chance”
men never won a game or turned a jack, although both feats were common and
frequent to the opposition; and furthermore, in support of this our verdict, we call
attention to the significant fact that the “chance” men are all busted, and the
“science” men have got the money. It is the deliberate opinion of this jury, that
the “chance” theory concerning seven-up is a pernicious doctrine, and calculated
to inflict untold suffering and pecuniary loss upon any community that takes stock
in it.
“That is the way that seven-up came to be set apart and particularized in the
statute-books of Kentucky as being a game not of chance but of science, and
therefore not punishable under the law,” said Mr. K—. “That verdict is of
record, and holds good to this day.”
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