34. XXXIV.
HOW OLD ABE RECEIVED THE NEWS OF HIS
NOMINATION.
There are several reports afloat as to how
“Honest Old Abe” received the news of
his nomination, none of which are correct.
We give the correct report.
The Official Committee arrived in Springfield
at dewy eve, and went to Honest Old
Abe's house. Honest Old Abe was not in.
Mrs. Honest Old Abe said Honest Old Abe
was out in the woods splitting rails. So
the Official Committee went out into the
woods, where sure enough they found Honest
Old Abe splitting rails with his two
boys. It was a grand, a magnificent spectacle.
There stood Honest Old Abe in his
shirt-sleeves, a pair of leather home-made
suspenders holding up a pair of home-made
pantaloons, the seat of which was neatly
patched with substantial cloth of a different
color. “Mr. Lincoln, Sir, you've been nominated,
Sir, for the highest office, Sir—.”
“Oh, don't bother me,” said Honest Old
Abe, “I took a
stent this mornin' to split
three million rails afore night, and I don't
want to be pestered with no stuff about no
Conventions till I get my stent done. I've
only got two hundred thousand rails to split
before sundown. I kin do it if you'll let
me alone.” And the great man went right
on splitting rails, paying no attention to the
Committee whatever. The Committee were
lost in admiration for a few moments, when
they recovered, and asked one of Honest
Old Abe's boys whose boy he was? “I'm
my parents' boy,” shouted the urchin, which
burst of wit so convulsed the Committee
that they came very near “gin'in eout” completely.
In a few moments Honest Old
Abe finished his task, and received the
news with perfect self-possession. He then
asked them up to the house, where he received
them cordially. He said he split
three million rails every day, although he
was in very poor health. Mr. Lincoln is a
jovial man, and has a keen sense of the
ludicrous. During the evening he asked
Mr. Evarts, of New York, “why Chicago
was like a hen crossing the street?” Mr.
Evarts gave it up. “Because,” said Mr.
Lincoln, “Old Grimes is dead, that good
old man!” This exceedingly humorous
thing created the most uproarious laughter.
