University of Virginia Library

LETTER XXI.

Dear Uncle Joshua.—The great battle, that 's been
coming on all summer, is over, and the smoke jest begins
to blow away a little, so that we can look round and see
who 's killed, and who 's wounded so bad they cant get
over it, and who 's driven off the field, and who stands
their ground and cries victory. I 've been looking out for
you here ever since yesterday noon, for I thought if it
looked up there, as though I stood any chance to be
elected governor, you would be right down here as quick
as possible, driving night and day, to see about them are
offices. For your know you promised to help me fix 'em,
and told me I must not give away one of 'em till you
come. And you may depend on it I should a held on to
'em to the bat's end, till you did come, let who would
come arter 'em. But as you have n't got here yet, I 'm
afraid I did n't run very well up there, so I thought I
would write to you and see what 's the matter. If I did
n't run any better up there than I did down here to
Portland, I would n't give a cent to be a candidate any

longer this year; for I might run till I was gray, and not
be elected. However, worst come to worst, I know what
I can do. If Judge Smith's got in, and they say about
here he 's gone all hollow, I 'll see if I cant work it so
as to get an office under him. — You see I kept pretty
still along for sometime before election, and I guess I can
manage it so as to make him think I lectioneered for
him, and then I 'll follow him up, tooth and nail, till he
gives me an office. I 'll try for sheriff first, and if I cant
get that, I 'll try for Clark of the Courts, for they say
that 's a pretty good office. And if he says he has given
them all away, I 'll try for Land Agent, for you know
I 've been about the woods a good deal; and if he says
that belongs to Dr Rose, I 'll try to be a Post Master
somewhere, or a door keeper to the Legislater, or some
sich like. And if he says these are all gone tu, I 'll tell
him if he 'll give me a fair price, I 'll water his horse and
brush his boots. And if he wont let me do that, I say
burn his boots, I 'll run against him again next year.

I spose you would like to know something about how
the election turned out down here. Soon as the bell
rung, I sot out to go to the town hall, but before I got
half way there, I met chaises, and waggons, and another
kind of chaises, that went on four wheels and was shut
up close as a hen-coop, all driving 'tother way, jehu like.
What is the matter? says I; who 's beat? But along
they went snapping their whips without answering me a
word, and by their being in sich a terrible hurry I thought
sure enough they had got beat, and the enemy was arter
'em. So I steered round into another street to get out
of the way for fear they should get a brush at me; but
there was as many more of 'em driving like split down
that street tu. Where upon arth are they all going, says
I, to a feller that overtook me upon the full run. Going?
says he; why to bring 'em to the polls, you goose head:
and away he went by me in a whisk. When he said
poles, I thought that cousin Ephraim must have come in

with a load, as they 'd be likely to fetch a good price
about this time, and I concluded all that running and
driving was to see who should have the first grab at 'em.
I called to him to tell me where Ephraim was, but he
was out of hearing.

So I marched along till I got to the town hall, and
they were flocking in thick as hops. When I got within
two or three rods of the house a man come along
and handed me a vote for Mr Smith; I stept on the side
walk and another man handed me a vote for Mr Hunton;
and I went along towards the door and another
man handed me a vote for Mr Smith, and then another
handed me one for Mr Hunton. And then I went to go
up stairs into the hall, and there was a row of about
twenty men, and all of 'em gave me a vote, about one
half for Smith and one half for Hunton. And before I
got through the hall to the place where they were firing
off their votes, they gave me about twenty more; so if
I had been a mind to vote for Smith or Hunton I could
have gin 'em a noble lift; but that wasn't what I was
arter. I was looking out for the interests of my constituents
at Downingville. And when I come to see
among so many votes, not one of 'em had my name on
it, I began to feel a little kind of streaked.

I went out again, and I see the chaises and waggons
kept coming and going, and I found out that bringing of
'em to the polls meant bringing of 'em to vote. And I
asked a feller that stood there, who them are men, that
they kept bringing, voted for. Why, says he, they vote
for whichever goes arter 'em, you goose-head you. Ah,
says I, is that the way they work it? And where do
they bring 'em from? O, says he, down round the
wharves, and the outskirts of the town and any where
that they can catch 'em. Well, well, thinks I to myself,
I've got a new rinkle, I see how this business is
done now. So off I steered and hired a horse and waggon,
and went to hunting up folks to carry to town meeting.

And I guess before night I carried nearly fifty
there, of one sort and another; and I was sure to whisper
to every one of 'em jest as they got out of the waggon,
and tell 'em my name was Jack Downing. They
all looked very good natured when I told 'em my name,
and I thought to be sure they would all vote for me.
But how was I thunderstruck when the vote was declared,
and there was 1008 for Mr Smith, 909 for Mr Hunton,
4 for Mr Ladd, and one or two for somebody else,
and not one for me. Now was 'nt that too bad, uncle?
Them are faithless politicians that I carried up to the
town-meeting! if I only knew who they were, they should
pay for the horse and waggon, or we'd have a breeze
about it.

Write soon, for I am anxious to know how they turned
out in Downingville.