University of Virginia Library

Act. 2.

Scen. 1.

Enter Charinus and Byrrhia his man.
Cha.
VVhat saist thou Byrrhia? must she then to day
Be married vnto Pamphilus?

Byrr.
Yes sir.

Cha.
How dost thou know it?

Byr.
But ene very now
Dauus so told me in the Market-place.

Cha.
Accursed, wretched me! how hitherto
My thoughts haue waited vpon hope and feare?
But hope now being fled, my fainting spirits
Wasted with care, yeeld to confusion.

Byr.
Pray, for Gods loue Charinus, since that things
Cannot be as you would, seeke to desire
What you may compasse.

Cha.
There is nothing else
In all the world I wish, but Philumen.

Byr.
But how much better were it, to endeauour
To vnlodge this idle loue out of your heart,
Then thus to talke of that which addes more fewell
To this your bootlesse vaine affection?

Enter Pamphilus walking in a dumpe.
Cha.
All men in health can easily prescribe
To the sicke patient good directions.
If thou wert in my case thy minde would alter.

Byr.
Well sir then doe your pleasure.

Cha.
But lo yonder
Where Pamphilus is. I doe meane to venture
All trials yet, ere I doe fully perish.

Byr.
What meanes he now to doe?

Cha.
I will request,
Beseech him, open to him all my loue.
I hope I may obtaine of him at least,
For some few dayes to put the wedding of.
I trust in th'Interim somewhat may be done.

Byr.
That somewhat is iust nothing.

Cha.
Byrrhia,
What think'st thou of it? shall I goe to him?

Byr.
What else? if he will yeeld to nothing, yet
Let him suspect, you haue good minde to horne him
If he shall marrie her.

Cha.
Away hence varlet,
With this thy lewd suspition.

Pam.
Charinus,
God saue you.

Cha.
And you also Pamphilus.
I was a comming to you, with desire
To craue hope, helpe, health, counsell at your hands.

Pam.
Troth I haue neither place for counsell left,
Nor meanes to helpe: but what's the matter man?

Cha.
Are you to day to marrie?

Pam.
So they say.

Cha.
If you doe Pamphilus, I can assure you,
This is the last day you shall euer see me.

Pam.
How so?

Cha.
I shame to tell it, Byrrhia prithee
Declare the matter to him.

Byr.
Yes, I will.

Pam.
What is it?

Byr.
Sir, he loues your wife that shall be.

Pam.
Troth he and I are of two seuerall mindes:
I can assure thee. Prithee hearken hither
Charinus; ha'st not had to doe with her
More, then thy man here talkes of.

Cha.
Pamphilus,
No o'my troth.

Pam.
Oh, how I wish thou haddest.

Cha.
Now I intreat thee by our friendship, loue;
First that you would not marrie her at all.

Pam.
Ile (what I can) auoid it.

Cha.
If't full so,
You cannot shun it, or doe else affect it—

Pam.
Affect it?

Cha.
Yet deferre it of awhile,
That I may void hence somewhere, and not see't.

Pam.
Charinus, now heare me. I doe not think't
At any time a part of honestie,
When one deserues nought, to expect for thankes.
Ide rather shun this match then thou obtain't.

Cha.
You put new life into me.

Pam.
If thou canst now,
Or this this thy man here; worke, inuent, fashion,
Take all the course you can to make her thine:
I will finde meanes, that mine she shall not be.

Enter Dauus.
Cha.
I haue enough.

Pam.
And in good time I see
Dauus, whose counsell I rely vpon.

Cha.
But thou dull head canst nothing cast about
Worth knowing. Can you leaue vs?

Byr.
Yes, and gladly.
Exit Byrrhia.

Scen. 2.

Dau.
Good God! what good newes bring I?
But where trow may I finde Pamphilus out?
To rid his feares, and fill his heart with comfort.

Cha.
He is iocund, at what I know not.

Pam.
Tut, man, tis, nothing.
The mischiefe now afoot, he yet not heares of.

Dau.
Who if he haue heard of this prepared wedding—

Cha.
Doe you not heare him?

Dau.
I guesse verily
Hunts all the towne ore for me, like a madman.
But where shall I looke for him? to what place
First bend my course?

Cha.
Why speake you not vnto him?

Dau.
Ile get me hence, and seeke him.

Pam.
Dauus, stay:
Come hither.

Dau.
Who ist cals? Oh Pamphilus,
I sought you: you here too Charinus? braue.
Both in the nicke. Y'are the men, I lookt for.

Pam.
Oh Dauus Ime vndone.

Dau.
Tut, list to me.

Cha.
I am for euer lost.

Dau.
Your feare I know.

Pam.
My life now lies at stake.

Dau.
Yours I know too.

Pam.
I must be married.

Dau.
That I also know.

Pam.
I, but this very day.

Dau.
You weary me
With newes, that I am perfect in already.
You feare to haue her; you to misse her.

Cha.
Th'hast it.

Pam.
I that's the point.

Dau.
Well, and I say the point
Has then no danger in it. Obserue me.

Pam.
For Gods sake rid me quickly of this feare.

Dau.
Lo, I free thee. Chremes now's not minded
To trouble you with a wife.

Pam.
How doest know it?

Dau.
Your Father tooke me by the sleeue e'en now,
And told me this day he would marrie you:
Adding much more, which now's no time to talke on.
Presently hastning to acquaint you with it,
I ranne to the Market-place: there missing you
I got to a high rais'd ground, and round about
Look'd to espie you; could not. Then by chance
I saw Charinus seruant, Byrrhia:
Of him I ask'd, he said he had not seene you:
It vex'd me: still I cast what I should doe.
Returning thence, a certaine iealousie
By circumstances bred came in my minde.
Vmph! heres small rost; the old man sad, a wedding?
It scarce hangs well together.

Pam.
Whereto this?

Dau.
I hie me streight to Chremes; thither come,
I note a silent stilnesse at the doore.
Now, this gaue me good heart.

Cha.
Well said, goe on.

Dau.
Somewhile I there continue: all that while
I saw no creature passing out or in;
No matron there; no decking of the house;
No stirre; I neerer came, and peeped in.

Pam.
I know they are good coniectures.

Dau.
Doe such things
Thinke you agree vnto a nuptiall day?

Pam.
In troth I thinke not Dauus.

Dau.
Doe you say, thinke?
You construe things not well: the case is plaine.
Besides, thence going I met Chremes seruant
With hearbs and small sprots for the old mans supper.

Cha.
Dauus, through thee I am now rid of care.

Dau.
Nay of my faith not so.

Cha.
Why man prethee?
For thou conclud'st, he will not giue her him.

Dau.
Conceited pate! as if it therefore followed,
If he not haue her, you must marrie her.
Vnlesse you lookt toot, make your suit, and meanes
T'her fathers friends, you may hap hop wiuelesse.

Cha.
Thou promptst me well; Ile goe about it streight:
Though oft this hope haue faild me: fare ye well.
Exit Charinus.

Scen. 3.

Pam.
VVhat meanes my father then?
Why doubles he?

Dau.
Ile tell you. If he now should chafe at you,
Cause Chremes will not let you haue his daughter,
Himselfe may see he plainly iniur'd you:
If he should presse you on, before he knew
How your minde stood inclined to the match.
But if you shall stiffely denie to wed her;
Then he will iustly lay the blame on you:
Then shall we haue a coyle on't.

Pam.
What would'st haue me
To vndergoe this marriage?

Dau.
Pamphilus,
He is your Father: and it will be hard
T'oppose him: this your sweet heart too (you know)
Is friendlesse here. Heele finde cause easily
To thrust her out o'th'towne.

Pam.
Out o'th' towne man?

Dau.
And speedily too.

Pam.
Counsell me then Dauus,
What I should doe.

Dau.
Tell him you'l marrie her.

Pam.
How?

Dau.
What's the matter?

Pam.
Should I tell him so?

Dau.
Why not?

Pam.
I nere will doo't.

Dau.
Denie me not.

Pam.
Perswade me not.

Dau.
Note, what hence will follow.

Pam.
To be shut out from her, mew'd vp to this.

Dau.
No, no such thing. I guesse your father thus
Will say to you: my purpose Pamphilus
Is that this day you wed: then answer you,
Sir, I am ready: pray you tell me now
For what cause can he chide you? by this meanes
His setled plots you shall disorder cleane:
Your selfe yet runne no hazard; for the thought
Is groundlesse, vaine, that Chremes may be wrought
To giue his daughter: nor doe you let fall
Your course, least he his purpose should recall.
Tell you your Father that you like the Bride:
That, when he would, he haue no cause to chide.
And for the dangerous passage that you feare;
Ile steare your course, and waft you ouer cleare.
No man will giue his daughter as a wife
To one discouerd of your wanton life.
Heele with some poore man rather seeke to place her,
Then suffer you to iniure or disgrace her.
But if your father see you quiet take
This his command, you shall him retchlesse make.
At leasure heele seeke out some other wife,
Meane time your fathers death may end the strife
Or some like good chance happen.

Pam.
Thinkst thou so?

Dau.
There is no doubt ith' world on't.

Pam.
Take you heede to what you lead me.

Dau.
Will you sir be quiet?

Pam.
Ile tell my father as thou bidst me: but
There must be care had, he by no meanes know
she's with childe by me; for I haue promis'd
To giue it breeding.

Dau.
Oh bold enterprise!

Pam.
She begg'd this promise of me, as assurance
That I would not forsake her.

Enter Simo.
Dau.
Ile looke toot.
Your Father's here: let him not note you sad.

Scen. 4.

Sim.
I come to obserue their carriage, note their plots.

Dau.
He thinkes now surely, youle refuse to marrie:
And comes from some lone place premeditate,
Thinking to puzzle you with a set speech:
Therefore collect your selfe.

Pam.
Well, as I can.

Dau.
In this thing Pamphilus you shall take my word,
You shall not now change two crosse sillables,
If you but say, you readie are to marrie.

Scen. 5.

Enter Byrrhia listening the incounter betweene Simo and his Sonne.
Byr.
My Master will'd me (all things else set of)
Pamphilus watch: & learn what course he takes
About the Bride. This caus'd me dogge him hither:
And loe, where he is with Dauus. To my taske.

Sim.
I see 'hem both together.

Dau.
Now sir looke toot.

Sim.
Pamphilus.

Dau.
Looke you backe as on the sodaine.

Pam.
Oh, you my father?

Dau.
I, that's well carried.

Sim.
As I late told thee, tis my purpose Sonne
That thou this day be married.

Dau.
Now I feare
His answer on our side.

Pam.
Sir, or in this
Or in what else I wait vpon your pleasure.

Byr.
Ha!

Dau.
Mute.

Byr.
What said he?

Sim.
Thou dost now my Sonne
As well becomes thee, when so graciously
Thou yeeldst to what I craue.

Dau.
Was I not right?

Byr.
My Master (as I heare) hath lost his wife.

Sim.
Get you now in: that when the time requires,
We be not driu'n to stay for you.

Pam.
Yes sir.
Exit Pamphilus.

Byr.
That in nothing one man may trust another!
It is an old said saying, and as common,
All to themselues wish best. My selfe haue seene
The maiden, and remember her a faire one.
Which makes me better beare with Pamphilus,
If he himselfe had rather nightly bed her,
Then let my Master. Ile beare backe this newes:
That he may pay me well, for my ill tidings.
Exit Byrrhia.

Scen. 6.

Dau.
My Master thinkes now I haue some deuice
A foot: and that, for that end I stay here.

Sim.
What ist, thou talkest Dauus?

Dau.
Eene iust sir.

Sim.
What, nothing? ha?

Dau.
Indeede sir nothing, I.

Sim.
I sure did looke to heare some newes from thee.

Dau.
I know tis chanced quite besides his aime:
That's it which nettles him.

Sim.
Ist possible
I get thee tell me a truth?

Dau.
Most readily.

Sim.
Doos this same wedding grieue him any thing,
By reason of the acquaintance that he holds
With yonder stranger?

Dau.
Truely I thinke not:
Or if it doe, the matter of his trouble
Will be at most two or three daies disquiet:
(Conceiue you sir?) then it will clearely vanish.
For with himselfe h'as tane a due account,
And set all cleare that way.

Sim.
I doe commend him.

Dau.
Whilst he had leaue, & his green youth did suffer't
He wencht a little; but yet priuately:
He euer had a care to keepe his name
Vntoucht; as did become a wise yong man.
Now mariage fits, he frames his minde that way.

Sim.
And yet me thought he appeared somewhat sad.

Dau.
Nothing about this businesse; but there's cause
That makes him somewhat angry with you.

Sim.
What?

Dau.
A trifle.

Sim.
What ist?

Dau.
Nothing.

Sim.
Tell me what?

Dau.
He saies y'are ouerniggardish in Cost.

Sim.
Who, I?

Dau.
That you haue scarce disbusd ten groats
In your prouision for his wedding supper:
What (saies he) is this like a Sonnes nuptials
Whom chiefely of my fellow batchelors
May I inuite (quoth he) to such a banquet?
And to speake that which may be said herein;
Intruth you are too too sparing, I lik't not.

Sim.
Hold your tongue.

Dau.
I haue gald him.

Sim.
I will see
That all shall be well carried. What meanes this?
What ist this old fox-hunt doth hammer on?
If there be any knauerie, his pate forg'd it.

Exeunt Simo and Dauus.