The Works of Capt. Alex. Radcliffe :: :: University of Virginia Library

Can any man in reason think it fit
That Death should eat a Steward at a Bit?
And in one long Vacation should devour,
What, in all Conscience, might have serv'd for four?
Had it been Term-time he'd have taken course
To have repell'd both him and all his Force.
Villainous Death! he would have plac'd a Chop
With every Dart that thou hast in thy Shop:
Thou durst not then attempt him (meager Glutton)
When he and's men were arm'd with Beef & Mutton;
Thou wert afraid to nibble at John Sprat
While Barrel-Cod and Whitings were in date,
His Voice disbanded thee, and all thy Troop,
When gracefully he gave the word, Serve up.
'Twas cowardly to take him, when Raw Fruits,
When Turneps, Cucumbers, and Cabbedge Roots
Had chill'd his Blood: he had defi'd being sick,
Had he surviv'd the time they call Tres Mich'.

127

But why had not thy hungry Maw been eas'd,
If Tosborough or Taylor thou hadst seiz'd;
Those single parts of Middle-piece and Rump,
Insatiate thou! to fall upon the Chump.
Since busie Sprat (our Lives Trustee) is dead,
The Bottled Joyes of Norfolk too are fled:
The Thetford-Ale, which won the hearts of Youth,
And made them chant his praise with open mouth:
Whom afterwards he'd greet in friendly sort,
Your Chamber, Sir, I think's in Coney Court.
When will't be opportune—to bring my Bill?
D'slife, ne'r talk of that man; when you will.
Then he (good man) who alwayes knew his time,
To Chamber-door would in the Morning climb.

Now trusty Sprat is gone, there will not come
So Generous a Steward in his Room:
He would in younger Brothers still confide:
Whose Parents do in Foreign Lands reside:
He entertain'd them well; yet did not know
Whether their Friends were living there or no.
They scorn'd to come as Commoners to eat,
But took it as the Noble Steward's Treat.

128

Ah cruel Hag! (though Muse be out of breath,
Yet see! she'l have one parting blow at Death)
Were there not equal Standers of the Hall,
That thou didst call Sprat in a private Call?
And, which is worse, by Tyrannous permission,
He did go out before he did petition.
Some Presidents 'tis likely we shall find
Upon the Roll of Commons left behind;
Which his surviving Friends (without a Bribe,
It is believ'd) are willing to transcribe:
Therefore 'tis hop'd (lest Youth should be perplext)
That his Executors may Go out next.

His Epitaph.

Beneath this Stone, Reader, there lieth flat
Upon his Back the trusty Steward Sprat:
Disturb him not, for if he chance to stir,
He'll say, When shall I wait upon you, Sir?