The Poetical Works of Thomas Moore Collected by Himself. In Ten Volumes |
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SOME ACCOUNT OF THE LATE DINNER TO DAN. |
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 | The Poetical Works of Thomas Moore |  |
244
SOME ACCOUNT OF THE LATE DINNER TO DAN.
From tongue to tongue the rumour flew;
All ask'd, aghast, “Is't true? is't true?”
But none knew whether 'twas fact or fable:
And still the unholy rumour ran,
From Tory woman to Tory man,
Though none to come at the truth was able—
Till, lo, at last, the fact came out,
The horrible fact, beyond all doubt,
That Dan had din'd at the Viceroy's table;
Had flesh'd his Popish knife and fork
In the heart of th' Establish'd mutton and pork!
All ask'd, aghast, “Is't true? is't true?”
But none knew whether 'twas fact or fable:
And still the unholy rumour ran,
From Tory woman to Tory man,
Though none to come at the truth was able—
Till, lo, at last, the fact came out,
The horrible fact, beyond all doubt,
That Dan had din'd at the Viceroy's table;
Had flesh'd his Popish knife and fork
In the heart of th' Establish'd mutton and pork!
Who can forget the deep sensation
That news produc'd in this orthodox nation?
Deans, rectors, curates, all agreed,
If Dan was allow'd at the Castle to feed,
'Twas clearly all up with the Protestant creed!
There hadn't, indeed, such an apparition
Been heard of, in Dublin, since that day
When, during the first grand exhibition
Of Don Giovanni, that naughty play,
There appear'd, as if rais'd by necromancers,
An extra devil among the dancers!
Yes—ev'ry one saw, with fearful thrill,
That a devil too much had join'd the quadrille ;
And sulphur was smelt, and the lamps let fall
A grim, green light o'er the ghastly ball,
And the poor sham dev'ls didn't like it at all;
For, they knew from whence th' intruder had come,
Though he left, that night, his tail at home.
That news produc'd in this orthodox nation?
Deans, rectors, curates, all agreed,
If Dan was allow'd at the Castle to feed,
'Twas clearly all up with the Protestant creed!
245
Been heard of, in Dublin, since that day
When, during the first grand exhibition
Of Don Giovanni, that naughty play,
There appear'd, as if rais'd by necromancers,
An extra devil among the dancers!
Yes—ev'ry one saw, with fearful thrill,
That a devil too much had join'd the quadrille ;
And sulphur was smelt, and the lamps let fall
A grim, green light o'er the ghastly ball,
And the poor sham dev'ls didn't like it at all;
For, they knew from whence th' intruder had come,
Though he left, that night, his tail at home.
This fact, we see, is a parallel case
To the dinner that, some weeks since, took place.
With the difference slight of fiend and man,
It shows what a nest of Popish sinners
That city must be, where the devil and Dan
May thus drop in, at quadrilles and dinners!
To the dinner that, some weeks since, took place.
With the difference slight of fiend and man,
It shows what a nest of Popish sinners
That city must be, where the devil and Dan
May thus drop in, at quadrilles and dinners!
But, mark the end of these foul proceedings,
These demon hops and Popish feedings.
Some comfort 'twill be—to those, at least,
Who've studied this awful dinner question—
To know that Dan, on the night of that feast,
Was seiz'd with a dreadful indigestion;
That envoys were sent, post-haste, to his priest,
To come and absolve the suffering sinner,
For eating so much at a heretic dinner;
And some good people were even afraid
That Peel's old confectioner—still at the trade—
Had poison'd the Papist with orangeade.
These demon hops and Popish feedings.
246
Who've studied this awful dinner question—
To know that Dan, on the night of that feast,
Was seiz'd with a dreadful indigestion;
That envoys were sent, post-haste, to his priest,
To come and absolve the suffering sinner,
For eating so much at a heretic dinner;
And some good people were even afraid
That Peel's old confectioner—still at the trade—
Had poison'd the Papist with orangeade.
| The Poetical Works of Thomas Moore | |