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The New Year 1861
Jan. 1-5
January lst comes in bright and beautiful but which of us do not feel that there are breakers ahead for us? Clouds rest upon our country and in another twelve months there may be in our homes many sad changes. In all our troubles we must look to "Him who is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble." Sue, John and Miss Vallant leave us early. Bob takes his leave in the evening. Oh, how lonely it seems. Write a long letter ....Do some reading and commence school again. Wish I could get up a supply of energy and go to work in real earnest but feel feeble in health and low in spirits. I am content to let the world run on and I make no effort beyond that which is necessary to get through my daily round of tasks ....
Jan. 6-12
No church. Roads too bad so spend a quiet day. Read Leila Ada, a sweet book. Commence the Lewis Family Tree though I have not yet succeeded in collecting all the materials for it. Finish reading Charles 0'Mally and am highly entertained. It is too good to be enjoyed all alone [so] refresh Daddy's recollections of some of the most laughable points and over them laugh together. A letter from Bob, poor fellow. It is not a satisfying letter; he does not know where to go to find real peace. Oh, that I might direct him ....[Letters written and received.] I'm in somewhat of a worry about [her sister and brother-in-law in Mississippi] Sally and Dr. Lea's letter. 'The day after it was send the words come that Mississippi had gone out of the Union. She is the third that has seceded and old Virginia remains unmoved. What can she mean?...
Jan. 13-19
No church, a very quiet day. A letter from Aunt Ria, also from Bob written in such a more hopeful spirit. Daddy has an epistle from Mr. Douglas Forest setting forth his claims to kinship with the Meriwethers of Albemarle through the Old Parson Douglas. I am fixed upon to answer it and give Mr. Forest all the points that I know anything of. Hope he is edified. Find my dear Ma sick in bed. Bob and Sam to spend Saturday night. Nothing is talked of now but the troubled times.
Jan. 20-26
No church. Roads too bad. Bob leaves before dinner. Sam stays until night. A long weary week to me being too much of an invalid to attend to my duties or even to enjoy reading so lying still and silent thought are my only occupation neither of which is happy, bodily or mentally. It is a great trial to have such a weak poor body and at the same time to feel the energy and spirit to be up and doing. So much bad weather but not cold enough yet for us to get ice.
Jan. 27-Feb. 2
No church on account of the roads. I'm rather better in health. Write Bob a long and serious letter; hope he will take it kindly. Also send Aunt Ria one of my lengthy epistles. Expect she still thinks I'm very warm on politics but I can't help writing about them for nothing else is talked of around me. I've been sadly out at heart at Old Virginia's slowness in this contest for our rights, she who once rejoiced in the sobriquet of the "Flag Ship of the Nation" seems perfectly indifferent as to whether we should stay with the Yankees or go with our own brave little Southern neighbors. But I was hasty in my judgment of the dear old Commonwealth and though she is slow I feel assured the Old Spirit has not left her and when she does move her influence will be felt far and wide. Hope great things from the Washington meeting when some of our wisest men will be sent and our States Conversations will soon follow to decide whether we shall stay in the Union. I believe we can trust Old Virginia that she will secede sooner than yield one inch of what we demand as our rights. What impertinence! presumptions! in the North to imagine they can force us to stay in the Union. It is easy to conceive now what our forefathers felt when Old England wanted to make them drink tea and it did not agree with them ....[Letters received.] I am reading some very interesting essays by Peter Beyers. Read one of GPR James' [George Payne Rainsford James] novels, a tame affair. I'm deep in Mrs. Browning and "Ossian" [a third century Gaelic poet] now. Rather lonely at times, nothing to excite me but the newspapers. Taking to "Ossian" again. A long letter from Sue on Saturday ....Sam and Bob spend Saturday night. Bob does not get in until about 10 o'clock at night and was off before breakfast Sunday for home
Feb. 3-9
No church. Some bright weather this week over head but too windy for exercise. I'm much interested in "Ossian"; what a collection of ideas but it appears to me to lack order. I would like it better to be in verses, it would be easier to keep the mind upon it. I'm low in the reading here and Sam lends me Cumming's Apocalyptic Sketches. How charming they are. His conclusions seem to me to be based upon very strong and clear arguments. Of course I can make no objections within but I have a vague indefinite idea that he makes that sealed book too plain for us mortals. It is intended to puzzle us. A letter from brother Peter who is sadly out at heart at the gloomy prospects before us. Says he expects nothing from Missouri; she is completely Yankeyed from St. Louis and [except for] one loan graveyard and the sacredness it holds he should be in Mississippi for he feels he can do nothing for Missouri. A note from Carrie Morrill enclosing a letter to her from dear little Emily; such a charming instructive letter. It made me feel so happy to read it. The dear girl has had two attacks of fever but they were slight and she soon recovered and then her health was better than it had been for two years. Gives a short sketch of her fellow laborers in the Cavalla Mission. What a worthy collection they must be. A letter from Miss Vallant. The little woman seems much quieter in mind. I wish I could be near her and see more of her for I love her very much. Answer all the letters, also write to niece Lizzie at Music Hall and a long one to Sue. Uncle Bob spends Monday night with us. Says his neighborhood is very dull. We hear that Lizzie Dee is going to give up school and return home; leaves in the hands of the Almighty when to go to school. I know it will be a hard trial for Lizzie. Ma is better and has taken possession of the keys again. She really seems to enjoy having the direction of household affairs again. Sam here Saturday night. He brings me another book. I've a good supply, enough to last until the 4th of March.
Feb. 10-16
No church on account of the bad roads. The 13th is Ash Wednesday the beginning of that holy season set apart by my loved church for repenting and humiliation which calls for many prayers. Oh, that I may so live during this precious seasons that it may not pass without leaving me a blessing! Mary Lewis, Nannie and I go to town the last of the week and stay with cousin Lou and I am thus enabled to get to church once more, the first time since the Sunday before Xmas. Spend the day at Orange Dale. Also get out to sister Betty's. The little baby has grown so much and is such a sweet little thing. She is called Aurora Cornelia after two Miss Lewis friends of the family....David and Met were at Mr. Brown's Saturday night and we had a truly pleasant time. Handsome Boylen (the Bishop) was very agreeable. Mr. Brown and I have a settlement of our affairs and I pay all my debts which makes me feel quite comfortable.
Feb. 17-23
Walk down to church. Mr. Meade reads the services but is too unwell to preach. I'm much disappointed; however, hear a good sermon from Mr. Nelson at night. Monday have such a pleasant call at Mr. Nelson's asking him to interest himself about Robert, to advise and direct him in his search after the worth of the religion of Christ and he kindly promised to do all in his power. Get home Monday to dinner ....I'm busy getting ready for a visit to Music Hall. Mammy Eliza has agreed for Maggie to go with me. We have set next
Tuesday (26th) if all is well to start. Dave will be our escort. Cousin Howel with us one day this week. Read a life of Mrs. Hoffman, the African missionary ....What testimony it bears of the power and joyful happiness of the Missionary's life. The time allowed her to work for God was short but in that short time many many were raised up and call her blessed. Finish Cummings on The Apocalypse. What beautiful books they are. The harmony between the prophecies and the signs of the times is very wonderful and shows a vast amount of labor and thought. Oh, that he may be correct in his opinion that the coming of our Saviour draweth nigh when our habitation shall be a new earth wherein dwelleth righteousness ....Disgusted with politics and have determined not to look at the papers for Old Virginia is acting an undignified part.
Feb. 24-March 2
We go to church in the waggon and hear Mr. Meade preach....Sam comes home with us. We have a long walk in the evening. I'm improving much in health. Monday evening Dave, Maggie and I go over to Dr. Leitch's to spend the night in order to be on time for the cars the next morning. After tea I go with Cousin Lou to her prayer meeting and hear such a fine address from a Mr. Vass. Tuesday morning take the cars for Music Hall. Sister Betty, niece Betty, Maggie Brown and little Cornelia are of the party. Find brother Jim in Orange but he returns Wednesday and brings me word that my friend Sally Williamson will perhaps join me here next week ....Do so much visiting. Go to The Creek Thursday Feb. 28th in honor of Jimmy's birthday and have a charming time. Cousin Sarsh is so well in health and spirits. She give us sherry puddings for dinner; great extravagence for the hard times. Miss Eatin was among the guests so Jimmy was pleased. We all walk home in the evening. Such beautiful weather; quite warm enough for May and it continues during the whole week. Spend Friday and Saturday at Uncle Bobs. Saturday (2nd March) Lizzie Dee's birthday. Aunt Sally and Miss Vallant out driving so we have the house all to ourselves. Bob appears very unexpectedly among us Friday night. He is looking much better; seems happier and well he may. I was mighty glad to see him at home. A letter from home this week; they are all sick. Poor little Maggie Lewis very homesick. I can well sympathize with her for I know the horrors of homesickness. I will send her up by David next week if he goes.
March 3-9
Attend Lay Reading at Grace Church. Such very warm weather. It makes me feel very weak. I walk a great deal and I think it helps me much. The 4th of March, the Ides of March, are past and Lincoln is our President. Oh, what a disgrace! How are we even to hold up our heads again? Oh, that Virginia would only secede even now. Sister Betty and her children leave on Tuesday. Lizzie Dee is also going up so I get Maggie ready to go with her. The dear child is so anxious to get home. Feel very quiet after they all leave ....[Letters received.] Tuesday Miss Vallant and I walk to The Creek to spend the night. Cousin Howel has promised me a fish the next day at The Watson's hole but the weather turned cold very suddenly and we had to give it up; hope to have it yet before I go home. Such a nice time with Cousin Sarah. We talk much of Emily. Dear Little Emily, will we ever meet again on earth? God knows what is best for us and to his will must we submit. Come home Wednesday evening after Prayer Meeting at Church. Miss Vallant stays all night with me. Thursday night Miss Vallant and I spend together at Kinloch and Friday we are at Clover Fields where the rain keeps us all day Saturday. I enjoyed myself much at both places for it is a great pleasure to me to visit around among my friends and kin ....On my way home from Clover Fields I meet with quite an accident or rather adventure. Miss Vallant and I were walking gaily along talking on a very amusing subject when coming up to Jack's Branch which was much swollen by the late rain I was trying to jump over, fell in and got such a soaking. I did not mind getting wet but I spoiled my new calico dress; however, we had a good laugh. Saturday, the day Sally fixed upon to be up but it seems too hard. Had a note from her in the evening and she seems doubtful about coming at all. I am much disappointed. I write that I will take no excuse. Miss Vallant is with me Saturday night.
March 10-16
At Grace church and hear Mr. Boyden....Cousin Fanny Hart told me such news from Missouri. Cousin Laurie Carr is married to a Mr. Vaughan. What will be done next! I've no right to object but I was very sorry to hear of it. Poor human nature cannot stand such tests. Well, what will we hear of after this event. I'm ready for any news from Missouri! I'm at Uncle Bob's Sunday night. Dave leaves for home on Monday. Brother Jim writes to Mr Forest today [with the family information that Louisa compiled.] Wonder if we will ever meet. I'm much interested in a Life of Havelock. Hear from home. Bruno is very ill with distempers. I'm in aggitation about him. Every dog of my acquaintance is either sick or has been with the same disorder. Cousin Howel fears Thomas has died as he is nowhere to be found and when last seen appeared to be suffering much. On Wednesday Miss Vallant, Lizzie Dee and I walk to The Creek to be ready on the spot for a fish the next day but this capricious weather seems determined not to give us an opportunity for by morning it has turned very cold and we have quite a severe storm during Thursday. This weather keeps Miss Vallant from her school and we all stay until Friday evening and have such a happy time. Talk politics, some work, etc. Cousin Sarah entertains us with sketches of the hours that have past. Friday Lizzie Dee stays with me. The young people have their Friday evening gathering at Music Hall and such a ball. The little boys are bashful and Lizzie Dee and I are requested to draw them out and such a frolic as we had. Oh, to think of the days when I too enjoyed such games but it's no use grieving, I've no wish to recall the past. Another letter from home. Bruno is better. How comfortable one of Mammy Eliza's long nice letters always make me feel. Miss Vallant with me Saturday night and Sunday.
March 17-23
Lay reading at Grace Church. Brother Jim reads one of Dr. Hungerford's beautiful sermons; subject, "The Christians resting and waiting on the Lord." Sunday very cold and looks like snow. Hope they will fill up with snow at home for we are among those who got no ice. Monday the 18th did some important work .... Made my will. Feel much more comfortable in mind in organizing my temporal affairs. Oh, that I could feel as well fortified about my eternal inheritance. How unworthy and unfit for this I must ever feel. No worthiness of my own can ever gain it for me. By God's graces alone, can I hope to dwell among the blest ....Julia Lewis is with Lizzie. The snow prevents her getting home Sunday and on Tuesday she is still at Music Hall. I'm reading Hugh Mulen's Impressions of England and am much entertained. Tuesday night Lizzie Dee, Alice and Jimmy Lewis come by for me to spend the night at Castalia as they wish my opinion and help about a Seccession Flag that Lizzie intends raising on some high point at Castalia. I agree to go with them and have a ride behind Jimmy on Fairy. We decide that the Flag should be a facsimile of that of the Southern Confederacy with the additions of a black star for poor old Virginia!!!. It is very humiliating. As some of the demon spirits around us consider it an act of rebellion we fix upon Patrick Henry's famous words for our motto, "If this be treason make the most of it!" It is raised on Saturday evening the 23rd with quite a company of ladies, gentlemen, boys and children and dogs. It was 45 feet high and made quite a show from the public road. Take supper at Uncle Bobs and have a chat with Lydia.
March 24-30
At church and hear Mr. Boyden....Miss Vallant is with me all Saturday and Sunday night. Lizzie Dee spends Monday night with me. My visit is now ended. Tuesday brother Jim takes me home in the Rockaway and I find them all well. Set in right to work. The garden needs me much; also my school. Cousin Lou Leitch makes us a visit this week with all the children ....Good Friday, March 29th, I attend church and hear such a beautiful sermon from Mr. Meade....Willie Meade read the service. The holy lenten Season is now past and has it brought me a blessing? Oh, how bitterly I've desired one. How few of the resolves made at the commencement have been acted upon and how many of them have come to naught. Feel that this greatest of Christian virtues, Charity, has been but little practiced by me. May God give me strength to keep a strict watch upon my thoughts and doings. Letters this week from Sue and Aunt Ria. Finish reading Prescott's History of Persia. Sam with us Saturday night.
March 31-April 6
Easter Sunday. Mr. Meade preaches ....Bob and Sam come home with us from church. A walk in the evening and some chat with Sam. Easter Monday have two hands to work my flower garden but it is such a bad rainy day get but little accomplished. Cousin Lou leaves in the evening ....[Visitors.]Read Rutledqe this week; it is very entertaining but would never do for real life. Write to Miss Vallant, Katie and Sue. Saturday get the flower garden finished, much to my joy. The hyacinths are very fine this year. It makes me feel very dissatisfied with myself that each returning spring brings to me less of that old feeling of gladness. Oh, the Spring hath less of righteousness every year and why is it? It is that there are many cares upon my Spirit just now that may account for it in part but I'm inclined to agree with Tom Mooney that "Time who steals our years away, steals our pleasures too." Saturday Sue and John appear among us very unexpectedly ....[Letters written.]
April 7-13
No church in consequence of the rainy weather. Do some reading to the children and to myself. The young ones are much instructed in The Pilgrim's Progress. In the evening I'm charmed and made so happy by receiving a letter from my own Emily; the Dear child is well and happy. It is such a nice long letter, 12 pages, and did my heart good. Oh, how interested she is in her work. A letter also from Lizzie Dee; she tells me she missed me. No particular news. Miss Vallant has some chickens and Sue Stanford [Bacon] was expected in Virginia either Friday or Saturday. I'm so glad Sue is coming among us again for we all love her much. Sue and John with us all the week. They had fixed upon Wednesday to go home but with a little begging agreed to stay until Saturday. It was well they did for it rained hard Saturday the 6th to Wednesday and the water was so high there was no crossing it and a part of the railroad was washed away so they could not have gotten off. We spend a happy but quiet week. Mammy Eliza gets Ellen ready to go home with Sue. I hope she may be satisfied for I think it will do her good to go. Sue will teach her and manage her too. Saturday they start off but do not get away from town in consequence of the railroad being washed up and soon after dinner they found their way back to Pantops. We are so glad to see them again. News Today! Fort Sumpter has been taken by the South Carolinians. The War has commenced and What is Virginia about? why won't she move?
April 14-20
No church as the old carriage has given out. Spend a quiet day at home. Uncle Alfred was buried today by his colored breathren. Some of us went up to the grave yard to hear the singing, praying and preaching and I enjoyed it all. Sue, John and Ellen get off on Monday. Sure enough, Strong News reaches us this week. War and Rumors of War! Two of the Charlottesville companies are ordered off on Wednesday night but where to no one can say. Harper's Ferry and Fortress Monroe possible points. Virginia's moving at last!!! Better late than never. Many of us are to witness some stirring scenes now. I trust the time has come to call forth all the bravery of the women as well as that of the men. The former will be called upon to give up for their country those dearest to them and this means many of them never to return until man's worst conquest is over. Oh, may there be none found who are not willing to give up all in such a cause as this. Our convocation is going on. Wrote Emily a long letter this week but am doubtful as to whether it can reach her with this country in such an unsettled state. We all expect daily to hear that the communication is cut off between North and South and my letter must sail from New York for Liberia. Do all sis Mary's Spring shopping for her but don't enjoy it. Feel too excited about the times and it seems wrong to be thinking of dress now. Attend church on Saturday and hear a beautiful sermon from Mr. Martin ....A great number of reports reach us from the scene of war but none that can be relied upon [for] people are so excited.
April 21-27
Hear Mr. Martin again. The waggon is the only mode of conveyance and the old carriage is much finished off. We will not have many more rides in it. Sam to Supper. News today very gloomy. Promise, Daddy's beautiful horse died last night and he will be a great loss to him. Lizzie arrives to make us a visit on Monday. We have very exciting talks about the times. We are all busy at work for the soldiers. I make Jimmy Lewis and Bob a little Noah's Ark of a bag. It holds needles, thread, buttons, thimble, scissors and every thing required for mending, etc and also a little linament which I hope may not be required. Go to town several days this week to hear the news. It is a very gay place now for many bright uniforms to be seen at every turn. One day get caught in the rain and take shelter with Cousin Isabella. Lizzie is with us until Saturday morning. It is a queer kind of visit to me. I can't exactly realize that she is with us. There are so many things that I was laid off to talk to her of and show her and the whole week passes and I forget all about [them] and don't know when I'll have another opportunity ....
April 28-May 4
No church today. Poor Uncle Stepney found dead in his bed this morning. Went to bed well Saturday night and found a stiff corpse in the morning. Truly there is but a step between us and eternity. Bob Lewis with us a good deal this week. One evening we walk to the old graveyard at the big Poplar Tree. What a scene of desolation and neglect is before us but with all its dilapidation it is a sweet spot and when remembering all the cares and troubles and heartaches that have found us, I could but envy the sleeping dead their quiet peaceful spot. Go to church on Tuesday. Bishop Meade with us. He confirmed 8 persons. The sermon is preached by Mr. Richards....It was a plain but interesting and edifying discourse. Richard Davis reads the service and I hear for the first time the President and Vice President of the Confederate States prayed for. I responded "Amen" from my heart. The old Bishop gives us an interesting instructing address. Touched very feelingly and appropriately upon this troubled times. A quiet peaceful week with the company of the last. Get some socks knit for Sam to go to the wars. Rather lazy about my reading. Begin some history; also for light reading, The Queens of Society. On Friday go to town. The place more quiet today than a week ago.
May 5-14
Go to church. Mr. Meade is sick, so a Mr. Ingles (a student) reads the services and a sermon...Sue's long looked for letter came to hand on Monday. The young woman shows her colors, with a Secession Flag. Thinks it not unlikely that the epistle has made a flying visit to "Old Able." Hope he was edified, gratified and instructed in its contents. I had written to Sue the day before it appeared telling her of its non-arrival ....[Letters written.] We go to town on Thursday for the news and to do some shopping. Hear all our companies have been ordered off. The Infantry started off this morning. The Cavalry are to go Saturday-so every thing attending the ladies and machines are busy getting things well fixed as the short notices will allow. Final destination is supposed to be Culpepper Court House to guard the railroad. Jimmy and Bob come by for their shirts, bags, etc. I pack them all up and a sad task it was. They may never return but if they do it will be as a noble cousin. Mary Lewis remained in town to help on the work for the soldiers. A great deal has been done by the Charlottesville ladies and much praises are due them. A long letter Saturday evening from Sue who gives some very terrifying instances of the ill and cruel treatment received in Washington and some of the other cities by people holding Southern sentiments. By people of a Christian land? The newspapers are filled with such atrocities but these instances were told her by eye witnesses of the facts. Alas for this society of Christian charity. Sue tells me they have over 600 soldiers quartered just across the road from them and a more orderly set she never knew. Several more companies are expected up daily. Ashland must be quite lifelike just now. Saturday night 1300 troops from the South pass through Charlottesville. They are friends and have come to help us to fight for liberties.
May 12-18
At church and hear a sermon from Mr. S1ack...The service was read by Mr. Johnston from Alexandria. Dick's fourth birthday [who] had a letter, a treat for him, on Saturday with which he is highly delighted. How little it takes to make a child of his years happy. Mary Lewis comes home from church but goes back again Monday evening to help more about the work .... On Friday I to over to sister Betty's and make her a visit of several days ....We take some long nice walks; go visiting. My nose cold is very bad. Make a good many acquaintances among the students. They are some of them very pleasant but beaux have long since lost all their attractions for me. One very young boy, Fergus Farquham, I take quite a fancy to. I'm old enough to pet little boys now. He seems to have associated altogether with ladies judging from his characteristics and there is so much simplicity of character about him. He and I get to be good friends. I'm quite surprised to see the ease with which my nieces entertain beaux, especially Susie. They are much too young in my opinion
May 19-25
Sunday we hear Mr. Johnston preach .... At night go to hear Mr. Granberry at the [University] Chapel ....Nothing is talked of now or thought of but the soldiers and their news. From the signs of the times we must expect strong news soon. A letter from Robert but on opening it found it is to Alice and he has sent mine to her. I'm so disappointed for I felt very anxious to hear something from him. Get home on Wednesday and find Ellen there. John brought her up on Sunday. He went back the next day so I did not see him. I'm very poorly for a day and night. Friday evening I was roused up from my afternoon nap to see a gentleman who had asked for Miss Minor and on going into the parlor was quite taken aback on being greeted with a kiss by a perfect stranger. Seeing my surprise, he said, "Don't you know me, your brother, Dr. Lea?" It was all right then and oh, how glad I was to see him. He is so pleasant looking and is so affectionate and treats me so like a real brother that I feel that I can take him right to my heart. He is on his way to Harper's Ferry were he holds the office of Assistant Surgeon to one of the Mississippi regiments. He spends an hour or so with us and then I go back with him to sister Betty's where I am a fixture as long as he is with us. At Rugby we have quite a family meeting as brother Jim and Lizzie [Minor] join us Saturday. I'm charmed with my new found Brother. He talks much about his little wife. Tells me of their first acquaintance and spring time of love. It seems a hard chore to leave her so far away. Saturday sister Betty and I prevail on him to write her himself and let us add on a note. I beg little Sally to come to us while her husband is at the wars. If she comes to Virginia she may have an opportunity of taking a peep at her good man occasionally. Oh, I hope and trust she may come. How my heart has yearned toward this dear sister and how I have hoped and prayed that we might one day meet. Quite a crowd of strangers to tea Saturday night but my brother Jabe Lea accompanies all my thoughts. Hear from Lizzie Minor that Miss Vallant and Sue Stanford (Bacon) left Virginia for the north this week. I think it is best that they are away for their own comfort. [Miss Vallant is a northerner and Sue Stanford Lewis is married to at Massachusetts man, James Terrel Bacon, and lives near Boston.] The news came Friday that Alexandria had been taken by the Federal Army. The enemy have now another foothold upon our soil. This seems a strange move for General Lee to allow. Time will show which side gains by it.
May 26-June 1
Have a soldier, Mr. Griffin, to preach. He is a private in the Amherst Company which is now quartered in our town. He gave us a good and suitable sermon ....His company filled the gallery. Brother Jabe leaves us today. It is very hard to give him up but this is not a time to keep back any treasures no matter how dear they may be to us. Sunday night I go again to the Chapel but do not get there in time to hear Mr. Granberry's text ....Get home early and go hard to knitting for the soldiers. Peg Taylor and Mary Lewis as busy as bees making shirts and pants for the Paddy Whacks. They were mustered into service on Saturday. Mr. Bennet Taylor is Captain and Sam next in command. They are a ragged looking set and the new clothes will be a decided improvement. They expect to be ordered off this week. Wrote a long letter to Sue but the mails are so scrambled that it is doubtful if she ever receives it. My nose cold still very bad. Our prospects for freedom are not so bright just now. The enemy hold Alexandria and Hampton. It is to be a hard struggle, I fear, but we have the Spirit of Right to contend with their mercenary hordes and may God in His mercy give us the victory. The Father of Lies is certainly abroad and is received by us all for of the many reports which we have heard and repeat, hardly one has even a shade of truth in it.
June 2-8
Do not go to church. Mary Lewis away until Wednesday working for the soldiers. News from the absent. A long sweet letter from brother Jabe. He seems very busy nursing his men through the Measles. Tells me something of his camp life, its lights and shades. The heroine of the Bouquet is there. I don't know her name. A note from Bob; he seems very well satisfied with a soldier's life. Tells me he has been in six miles of the Potomac. Both Dr. Lea and Bob say that a big fight is expected in the next few days and think it's time we were dealing some blows. The dear ones tell me it's all right but I must confess to a want of faith in the judgment of our leaders when we hear of these coward Yankees creeping into Virginia at so many points and so little effort made to keep them back. Capt. Taylor's company are not to leave Charlottesville. They are to be encamped above the University. The new clothes for the Paddy Whacks have all been finished and they decidedly improved the looks of the company. A large body of Cavalry passed down the road this morning. They numbered 1800. Bedford Charlie Meriwether was one of the Officers. Their destination was Manassas Junction ....[Letters received and written.] Fergus is to leave this week for his home; his mother has written for him and his brother, Gary the silent. I'm sorry my little friend Fergus is going. Hope we may meet again in the brighter and more peaceful times. A call from brother Jim.
June 9-15
No church. Too warm to try the waggon. Sam with us in the evening. So many trains of cars today; soldiers being sent West-East. Gen. [Harry A.] Wise in command. Hope he will fight both with his tongue and hands. A letter to Mr. Brown from brother Jabe. There is some possibility of the army at Harper's Ferry taking up the line of march for Baltimore when they get a little stronger. In a few days they expect to number 50,000. He was still busy with the measles. On Wednesday the letter from Bob written at Culpepper Court House comes to hand. A letter from Sue and the last of the week we hear from my dear little Sis. She seems very anxious to be with us but thinks she will have to wait until lst of July as she will not be able to get an escort before then. Oh, how happy I am at the prospect of having her with us so soon. Two whole weeks yet, but I must be patient. Finish reading the Queens of Society and The Dolls and Beaux of Society. Enjoy them much. Throw myself away on novels this week. Don't feel at all satisfied with myself-it is so much time yet. The Montgomery Guards leave tomorrow the 15th for Manassas
June 16-22
Hear Mr Slack [preach.] Go to sister Betty's. We talk and think much of little Sally's coming. Go at night to the chapel and hear Mr. Granberry. Stay Monday with Cousin Lou. Find Tatiana very poorly. Pet her up; the dear little pet seems to understand all about why I care for her. Lewis has gotten quite sick again. Have a letter from Bob and Sally. Bob has moved to Occoquan; advancing on the enemy. Writes in good spirits and requests that if he falls I will see that he is buried by the side of his great grandfather Lewis under the Big Poplar. Dear boy, may I never be called upon to perform such a sorrowful task for him. Little Sally still thinks she cannot come until July. She write me a sweet loving letter. Oh, that no cloud may rise to dim our happiness in this eventful time. Cousin Howel with us Tuesday and in the evening Jimmy Brown arrives in the Rockaway bringing me word that Sally has arrived and I'm sent for. Oh, what joy. I get ready and go up to Rugby with him. Little Sis gives me a sister's welcome. My heart's desire has been accomplished. I've seen this sister that I so often pictured to myself in my sleeping and waking dreams. How many blessing are granted me! Oh, that I may be truly thankful to my Heavenly Father for them all. Sally looks much as I had imagined she would. Is a little slip of a woman but full of life and spirit. The old people all say she looks like our mother. She seems full of love for us all. I am fully satisfied with my share. I'm very happy with my two sisters. On Thursday brother Jabe arrives very unexpectedly. What a happy party we have now. He is looking badly; has a bad cough. Oh, what a dear Brother he is. I never though I could love him as such and feel so much at my ease with him. He brings me some dear trophies for the curiosity box. We are very anxious for brother Jim to make his appearance; fear Sally and brother Jabe feel slighted that he has not been to welcome his little Sis after so long a separation. I feel satisfied that there is something of importance that kept him. Try to explain it to Sally but she doesn't know him as I do. Hope she may learn to love him as I do for he is worthy of all the affection we can bestow upon him. Saturday brother Jabe, Sally and I dine at home. I feel much gratified at the way my little Sis and brother Dr. Lea are received by my home people. Know they do it for my sake now; hope it will be for their own when they get to know them well. Go back to sister Betty's to supper. What a happy time I'm having. My sisters and brothers around me to my heart's content.
June 23-29
We do not go to church in the morning. Have a quiet day at Rugby. Brother Jabe and I look over the letters together. What a dear brother he is. Sunday night we go to the Chapel to church and hear Mr. Granberry....My enjoyment is complete if brother Jim was only with us. Brother Jabe leaves on Thursday. His brigade is now stationed at Winchester; Harper's Ferry having been evacuated by General Joseph E. Johnston and his forces on the 16th. Brother Jabe had some funny stories to tell us of his run from Harpers Ferry. It seemed a strange move but we all assumed it was all right. Sally and I feel as miserable as rats after he leaves. Brother Jim comes up on Saturday. He seems poorly. Makes arrangements to send up for little Sis and I next week. Sally and I go to town with him on his way home and have a gay time. Lizzie Dee spends the night with us. Sally seems to take right to her. Our nieces have a levee nearly every evening. Sally and I, like thoughtful old Aunts, object much to them. They are much too young to be thinking about beaux. They had much better be at their books.
June 30 - July 6
A rainy Sunday. A Happy day. Sally and I come home early Monday morning. I do so much work getting ready for Music Hall. Write to Emily and Sam. A letter from Bob. He seems contented; nothing to trouble him but his Captain. I'm very sorry they have not a more efficient one; fear they will never distinguish themselves with such a leader as Capt. D. Some more fighting this week. A sound of battle is in the land and of great destruction. Harvest is going on; the wheat is very fine. 4th of July. I am much exercised on this subject. In my opinion it ought to be buried along with the stars and stripes. Think it would be as well to give up the far famed Declaration of Independence too, for most of our present grievances may be traced to a misinterpretation of that said document and we have proved beyond a doubt the falsity of the clause that "all men are born free and equal." I can never feel any exultation for the 4th of July now. As a historical day it may still be worthy of memory but we have no further use for it as a national festival. The Comet appears! What does it purpose for us; war or peace? It is not for us to know only to watch and wait. Many rumors from the Seat of war but not reliable. Friday, brother Jim's carriage comes up for little Sis and I. We get down to Music Hall before night and feel so happy to be down home once again. Find Mr. Coffman there getting ready to go soldering. He is to be sent West with the new company from the University. I make his needle book. The love affair progresses, I think. Sally and I call at Uncle Bob's. Little Sis is much pleased with her new found kin .... [Letters received.]
July 7-13
Go to the Brick Church and hear Mr. Nelson [preach.] Find many friends and introduce them to little Sis. Monday cousin Fanny Hart comes and spends the day and night with us. So many of the neighbors to call in the evening ....[Letters written.] We are hoping to have brother Jabe with us sometime soon. Sis and I at Uncle Bob's for a day and night. It is real fun to see Sally and Aunt Sally smoking together; they get quite sociable and chatty. Sister Betty and little Cornelia make us a visit of a few days and we enjoy seeing them much. Have a letter from Sue this week. She talks of joining us in this neighborhood if she can bring herself to leave John long enough. Bless these husbands. Says she has a button from battle for me cut from a Yankee's coat. A letter from my brother Jabe. Tells me he has found Nicky Lewis and has advised him to try and get into a private house until he can get leave to come home which he strongly perscribes as the measles has left him weak and unable to play soldier. Brother Jabe says they are all packed and ready to start at a moments notice but when or where he knows not. No chance for his making us a visit anytime soon for he would not on any consideration miss the engagement which most everyone is looking for. I'm very poorly this week but Sally nurses and pets me up so that it don't go very hard with me. Letters from home ....No news.
July 14-20
At church and hear Mr. Boyden [preach.] See the Prince Polignac [the Frenchman, Camille J. Polignac who becomes a general for the Confederacy], the first live Prince I've ever seen. He is a real gentleman in looks. He has come to cast in his lot with us and help us to fight for our liberties. May he prove another Lafayette. We are all cast into the depths of woe by the news of Monday. The President has issued the order calling out the military. It comes too close to home this time, as my dear old Brother [Jim] thinks he will have to go, and besides being in very feeble health his family will be left so unprotected. It seems a very suspect order for we have foes around which must be kept in awe as well as Yankee enemies at a distance. Great complaints against Jeff Davis but I'm in hopes he will listen to reason and revoke this order before anybody's hurt. Monday is such a blue day. We all feel so heavy at heart. So many people imagine they hear the guns at Manassas and our hearts fail when we think of the fate of those among them who are near and dear to us. May The God of Battles be with them. On Monday evening Sis and I go up to Cousin Fanny Hart's where we stay until Friday evening and have such nice quiet times ....One day while there cousin Fanny takes us to Clover Fields to dine ....Poor Mary Walker [Randolph]. I feel much for her. Her health is very feeble; has such a cough and seems to take Tom's absence so much to heart. One morning we go down to Kinloch to call and in passing the Church remember it is prayer meeting evening. We have dinner with the good people of Kinloch and say we must go to church and set out for the occasion. Sally, as the distringuished guest, is give the handsomest bonnet that could be found and very becoming it proved. I was dyked out in a very fanciful hat with a plume. Altogether looked very ridiculous for one of my years. Cousin Fanny choses to stick to her chicken bonnet and was vastly admired for her independence. Our entrance into Church caused no little talk. Get home Friday evening and find everyone in better spirits. Brother Jim has been exempted from going to the war, indeed the order has been revoked in a great measure and according to the present interpretation Albemarle has very nearly if not quite furnished her number; she has some 21 companies in the field. The news from Manassas for last Monday was false but we had a battle the last of the week in which 900 of the Yankees are supposed to have fallen. Our loss was very small in comparison. This may be the beginning of a Waterloo fight which we expect in the next day or so. On the 11th and 12th, I think, we met with a serious loss in North Western Virginia; could not be said to be routed, only overpowered by superior number. Col . Garritson's own sister was killed. We all shed tears but cannot always expect to come off without any loss. A letter from Dave. He tells me of an increase to the cat family. Says Grandma pronounces them perfect beauties. A letter also from Jimmy Lewis written on the eve of the fight at Manassas ....[Letters written.] Finish such a big piece of block work; also help about some work for the soldiers. A great many sick soldiers in Charlottesville now. A large hospital has been established for them in Charlottesville; also at The University.
July 21-27
Attend Lay Reading at Grace Church. Hear Nicky Lewis has come home. After dinner Sis and I go down to call on him and heard the news from Jabe. Have a pleasant visit. Nicky tells us a good deal of correspondence. It is true that Johnston has left Winchester and is ordered to join Beauregard with his forces and everything promises a big fight soon. News on Monday. We have met the enemy and they are ours. The largest battle ever fought on our shores [the battle of First Manassas or Bull Run] came off on Sunday the 21st. The loss on both sides very great but that of the enemy supposed to be three times as great as ours. We are supposed to have lost in killed and wounded at least 2,000 (no certainty about it). Truly it was a glorious victory and I hope that good may come of it at last in spite of "little Peterkin" for we hope much it may cause our recognition abroad as one of the nations of the earth and it is proof positive to the Yankees that we are able to take some care of ourselves. It seems that we can cut up the Grand Army which was enroute for Richmond via Manassas. Large quantities of provisions, military stores and implements of war were captured by our soldiers from the Barbarians. They were said to have handcuffs ready for us so sure were they of conquering us poor rebels but Holy Writ says the battle is not always delivered to the strong and so they have found it. How comforting to us that so many of the lessons appointed by our beloved Church are so appropriate to the times in which we live and in every case we could be the favored people. Surely this is not chance but to show us the salvation of our God. The night after the great battle, the lesson read in our church and in many of our home circle was Moses and Miriam's song of triumph after the overthrow of the Egyptian host. We too could sing that song for we had triumphed gloriously and God had dashed in pieces our enemy. Oh, that our Faith and Trust may ever be in Him and if He is with us we fear not what men can do unto us. Hear several letters from our boys read. They were in the fight and behaved gallantly. None of them hurt, thank God. Bob writes words that Billie Williams [his horse] has immortalized himself. Our boys took twenty big guns and about 100 Yankee prisoners. Spend the day at The Creek and at Uncle Bob's. Sally has news of brother Jabe. One of his subs, Dr. Minor, was wounded and sent up to the University to his uncle J.B. Minor and brother Jim, by accident, found him out at Gordonsville. He had a note for little Sis written from the battlefield to tell her Jabe was safe and whole. The next day came another note saying he was on his way to Charlottesville with the wounded of his brigade and after getting them set up he would come down. We are much excited. Bed time comes but no brother Jabe and we retire with heavy hearts but before we get to sleep he makes his appearance. Oh, how thankful I feel to have him among us once more. He has some very amusing stories to relate of the battle as he was on the field from the beginning until the last gun was fired. Oh, how blest a brother he is. How many blessings I enjoy; so many brothers and sisters and dear ones around me. May I be truly grateful to Him who gives them to me. Aunt Sally and some of the cousins come to see Jabe. On Friday go up to Charlottesville and spend the day at Keswick. The cars won't take me up until dark. [It is] after supper time when we get to Rugby very tired and hungry. Saturday get home bringing little Sis and Jabe with me. We have such happy times. Forgot to say had a nice letter from Sue this week. She has fixed upon Tuesday to be with us but John feared the cars would stop carrying the mail and passangers and so she gave it up. How disappointed I was, indeed all her friends were. It hurts me to thing of the long time we've been separated ....Ma a little complaining. So many beautiful kittens.
July 28-Aug. 3
No church. A happy day. Little Sis and brother Jabe leave me Monday morning. I'm lost by myself; the first time Sally and I have been separated since she came to Virginia ....[Letters written.] Tuesday evening brother Jabe comes for me in the Rockaway. I'm so glad to be with him and little Sis once more. Go one evening to see the sick soldiers at the University. I'm also introduced to Jeff Davis, not the President but a perfect beauty of a little dog. He belongs to the 11th Mississippi boys and was one of the heroes of the battle of Manassas, being in the whole of the fight. The poor wounded sick soldiers are kindly cared for but they look so wretched it made my heart pain to see them. Saw one of the Yankee Captains who was wounded and taken prisoner. One of brother Jabe's subs took tea with us at Rugby. He was a talking chap. Thursday we try the cars again and get to Keswick and walk from there to cousin Fanny Hart's and find quite a number of the kindred there. Have a pleasant time. In the evening get down to Music Hall and take them all much by surprise but we are warmly welcomed. Do some dining out. Very quiet pleasant times with my brothers and sisters, nieces and nephews. Mary Walker has another daughter which I hear she calls Jane after Mr. Randolph's mother.
Aug. 4-10
Attend Lay Reading at Grace Church. Quiet enjoyment. A nice long chat in the evening with Jabe and Sally. I'm afraid I'm very sadly spoiled by them; never was as much petted before and I don't know whether it is doing me any good, poor weak human nature as I am. Monday we come home in the carriage with Aunt Sally's company as far as Charlottesville where she has come to see after Lizzie Dee who has been up sometime nursing sick soldiers. The one she came particularly to care for has died. He was staying at Dr. Leitchs. Spend this week at Rugby. Brother Jabe in Richmond for two days where he went to see his Colonel who was wounded. Brother Jabe looked out John Macmurdo and made himself known to him and cousin Sop. He does not have time to go out to Ashland and see Sue which we all regreted. Saturday evening take tea with Miss Carroll ....Have a dark walk home and then sat up late getting Jabe ready to start off the next day.
Aug. 11-17
Jabe leaves us today for his Brigade at Manassas. What changes may happen before we all get together again but we must hope for the best and trust One who ordaineth all things right. No church, spend a quiet day at Rugby. Monday I go over to town enroute for home where I do not arrive until Tuesday evening. Brought Tatianna [the cat] with me. She is very sociable and interesting; seems to know she is at home. I do not mind being slow enroute for I have an opportunity of seeing something of Cousin Lou and we have been such strangers to each other for some time past. She has been so busy with soldiers' clothes and now the sick take up most of her time. Find them all well at home and glad to see me. Ma is much better. Go hard to work as I find so many things needing my attention. It is a hard trial to being separated from Sally. When I remember how near she is and there is a possibility of her leaving us soon, it makes me feel so badly . If she does not soon come to me I must go to her. I sometimes doubt if seeing her has done me any good for she has become so necessary to my happiness and how low and sad I must feel when she leaves me for good and all but this is a wrong feeling; I must mask it. God's blessings, which he shows with so bountiful a hand along my pathway, must be enjoyed while they last and when they are gone I must have a thankful happy heart they were ever given me. Alice and Jimmy Lewis are visiting us. A note from little Sis enclosing a letter she has had from Jabe. He is regularly in camp and finds his dog Buc quite companionable. The letter made me feel rather blue. Such a bitter feeling nourished by the Mississippians towards the Virginians whom they imagine have not given them much honor for their bravery in the fight at Manassas. Hope things may be settled to the satisfaction of all parties and that right soon. A letter from Sam. He tells me of the fight and the part he played in it. Read Indians and Sultans; it is a strange story but so entertaining. Have done a good deal of other reading in the last few weeks but it has been mostly light reading. I can't settle myself to anything that requires thought.
Aug. 18-24
A rainy Sunday. So lonely. Oh, if I only had little Sis with me. She is only waiting until she has her teeth taken out, then she will come to me. It seems hard for her to screw her courage to the sticking point. Well it does take some bravery to sit down and have three teeth drawn. Tuesday evening I get a note from Sis and she tells me she is sick and is pining so to see me so I conclude to go to her. I fix up and Dave drives me to Rugby in the buggy. I find Sally in bed and suffering very much with her head. She is so glad to see me. Really I feel as if I was of some comfort to her. Find sister Betty has two convalescent soldiers staying with her, Dr. Lewis and Mr. Taylor, both of them belonging to the 1lth Mississippi Brigade. They seem to be gentlemen and add much to our little circle. Poor fellows, my heart aches for them when they talk of their far off homes and kindred and how they hope and watch for the time when they can return to them. Little Sis is soon well enough to leave her room. I tell her she was only sick to see me. Have three Miss Minor's to dine with us. Sally and I have several walks to town and on one occasion go with our two sick soldiers to the University to see the Cadets drill. It is a beautiful sight. My heart is made glad this week by a letter from dear Miss Vallant. It comes by Adams Express. She does not touch our politics and tells me I must observe the same rule when I write otherwise the letter might not be permitted to pass. She and Aunt Ria are well but so uneasy about us all. They know nothing of the fate of our boys at the Manassas fight but fear some of them must have fallen. Her heart seems full of love for all her old Virginia friends. My dear old Friend, may we live to see each other in happier times. She will have a school in Williamsburg [New York] and live with her sister (Miss A) who is houskeeping. Miss Vallant tells me Sue Bacon is very miserable about her brothers. Does not know if they fell in the battle. How I wish they knew how her brothers and the others of our kin, as well as friends, were all spared. Dear Miss Vallant, I wish much to write and tell her of us all but the papers say all communication by express is stopped. A long letter from Sue, she tells me we may look for her any day. How glad I am. Enjoy myself much at Rugby. Sister Betty and brother Brown are so kind and good to me. The two oldest girls are away until Thursday when they get home escorted by Lewis Thomas. He was not killed as we at first heard but turned up some two or three weeks after we left cousin Fanny Harts. He is quite agreeable and tells me of his soldiering in Western Virginia.
Aug. 25-31
At church Sunday morning and hear Mr. Meade [preach.] It is a great treat to go to my own church and hear my own pastor once more. In the evening Dave appeared very suddenly and tells me Sue and John have arrived and he has come for me as John will leave early in the morning and he wants to see me. So I say goodbye to my sisters, the two soldiers and the other inmates of Rugby and start for home again. Sue and John seem very glad to see me and I certainly enjoy the sight of them. John leaves early Monday and leaves Sue to us for a while. Dave brings down little Sis early in the day and I'm so happy. Am feeling very badly in health but Sally pets me so that I can't complain much. Found two invalid soldiers staying here: Capt. McFarlane of the 4th Alabama Regiment and Lieut. Clinchscalis of the 7th South Carolina Regiment. The Capt. leaves on Monday. He is a paddy boss and as a matter of course is witty and entertaining so am sorry to give him up. The lieutenant hangs fire all this week. He is very quiet and gentlemanly. I'm poorly for several days but have Sue and Sally around me so do not come to complain much. A letter from Bob; he sends me a lock from Bill Williams tail which I shall treasure up in my curiosity box. Also a long letter from my dear old friend Sally Williamson and one on Saturday from Brother Jabe. He is much pleased with his mad dog Buc. Saturday little Sis has to leave me as brother Jabe has sent for some clothes and she has to go back to see about getting and making them. [She] promises either to come back to me or else send for me the week after this coming one if all is well. It goes hard with me to be away from her even for a short time but I've Sue with me now and ought to be satisfied.
Sept. 1-7
At church and hear Mr. Meade....See Dutchie; she talks of visiting us. I'm much interested in a History of the Mexican War [by] Frost . ....[Letters written.]Read this week Dr. [Joseph Holt] Ingraham's Pilar of Fire or Israel In Bondage. It is very fascinating like his other two but in my opinion is not equal to either of them. He allows his imagination a very wide scope .... Sue is poorly in bed for a day or so in consequence we do not see very much of her. A note from little Sis. She is wishing much for me. She sends me Jabe's fair locks for Sue to have done up for her in Richmond. Saturday Rose [Macmurdo] comes for a short visit. Another note from Sis with news from Missouri. The Federals are in Auburn and some of our kin have been badly treated by them. I'm afraid to think of the next news we may have from them. Little Sis has had the teeth taken out. Oh, how glad I am and hope to have her with me next week. Lem Clinchscalis left on Sunday the 8th. He was with us just two weeks and expressed great regret at leaving. I'm glad he was pleased.
Sept. 8-14
John comes up today for Sue. They are off early Monday. It is a mightly feeble little visit from Sue; I wish she had been satisfied to stay longer. Oh, if I only had Sis with me now. I'm very poorly again but I must not notice. She gets Jabe's box off. Monday evening little Sis comes in very unexpectly; tells me she looks for Jabe tomorrow and his orders are that I'm to be at Rugby ready to see him as he may not stay but a day or so. I'm poorly and expect the Doctor but somehow I manage to get off from the old folks by promising to go myself to see Dr. Leitch. Find a happy party at sister Betty's and all glad to see me. Jabe comes next day and is very poorly. He is confined to his room and a part of the time to his bed. We feel so uneasy about him, so fearful of fever but by Saturday decide it is nothing worse then chills and fever. I don't enjoy seeing him sick but am glad to have him with us on almost any terms. He is not himself when sick and it is most impossible to get a word out of him. We have a gay time; lots of soldiers and they play the violin so nicely. All belong to the 11th Mississippi Brigade. Two Mr. Fasts and Mr. Dorgood I get best acquainted with. Wonder if we will ever meet again. Get a letter from Jimmy Lewis, Charlotte and a note from Sue enclosing a scrap of General [G. P. T.] Beauregard's pants. Miss Rose sent it. A note from home telling me Daddy has been very poorly again ....[Write letters.]
Sept. 15-21
At church and hear Mr. Butler....Jabe and I have some serious talk after tea. Very quiet time. Jabe poorly and out of spirits. Soldiers arriving every night; a chinquipin hunt sometimes in the evening to relive the summers of our life. Read Romance of The Forest; perfect trash. Jabe leaves on Thursday (mistake Friday) morning and we, little Sis and I, take our departure in the evening. Get home before night ....Find two soldiers quartered here. They belong to the 7th South Carolina Regiment: names Mr. McGhee and Mr. Moore. Both seem gentlemen in my opinion. They are quite agreeable and add not a little to our quiet circle. Find a letter waiting me from Bob; he writes in find spirits. They are now quartered at Fairfax Court House. He has been in sight of the Federal City and has seen the Stars and Stripes waving from the dome of the Capitol. I have happy times with little Sis.
Sept. 22-28
No church. quiet walks long letter the former; kept quiet. I'm rather poorly. Do some shopping, some reading and working this week. Wrote a long letter to Jabe and also one to Sue. Had one from the former; says the movements of his Regiment are all kept quiet.
Presume he is near Dumfries. Complains he has nothing to do in Camp [with] only two on the sick list. Sad news from Ashland. Walker Macmurdo, while out hunting on Tuesday (I suppose) in handling his gun accidently shot himself through the head and throat producing instant death. Poor Walker, we little thought when you were with us last summer your days were numbered. Truly in the midst of life we are in death. It must be a great shock to his family; the first death among a family of 11 brothers and sisters. Sally leaves me Thursday morning. How I miss her but she has promised to return in a week or ten days. She is going on Saturday to a visit to cousin Fanny Hart. I feel so useless and troubled when Sis is not with me. Captain Bennet Taylor to tea Thursday evening. He gives me hopes of our Army going into Maryland; seems to like Camp life and I'm sure it must suit him for he is a perfect picture of heath. Had forgotten to say that last week while at sister Betty's I call an evening at The Delevan House [the Delevan Hospital was the major military hospital in Charlottesville during the Civil War] to see Lizzie Lewis who is there acting as nurse in the hospital. Lizzie seems happy in her work. She took me in her storeroom which serves as Parlor for her visitors; invited me to go and see her patients but I declined [as] it looks so much like curiosity to be prancing around if I do not intend to help to nurse. I can but respect Lizzie's motives and intentions but cannot bring myself to imitate her example. Friday the day was cold and dark and rainy and not feeling in the humor for work or reading wrote long letters to Jimmy, Bob and Sue. I'm out of debt now, don't owe a dime to anyone. Bennet Taylor takes my letters to Manassas.
Sept. 29-Oct. 5
Mary Lewis, Dave and I walk to church and hear a sermon from Mr. H.R. Scott....I enjoy both church and the walk. The papers of the last few days bring news of a glorious victory gained by our forces over the Federals at Lexington, Missouri. A large amount of money, stores and prisoners taken. Victory has now crowned our army in Missouri. The battle comes off Sept. 16th. Reports reach us that a fight is daily expected at Manassas and the region round about but up to Saturday it has proved nothing but report. Friday a long letter from Jabe. He has at last visited that time honored place, Dumfries; thinks its glory has departed. He is trying to get the appointment of full surgeon to the 17th Regt of Mississippi Volunteers. I hope he may succeed; don't want to have anyone over him and the pay is better too. That is no objection in the world. He talks of running up to see us for a day or so next week. Mary Lewis and I take a notion for quilts this week and commence two, a Chessboard and a medallion, intended to adorn the beds in the Lodge when they are finished.
Oct. 6-12
I am too poorly for church. Such a miserable cold keeps me up in the Lodge for two or three days. Oh, how I'm pining for Sally. Such cold gloomy weather; it makes me blue. Monday a letter from Bob. He is of the opinion that Delay is fighting us a battle. Differs from me in wishing for a "dashing campaign." Well he may be right; hope he is at any rate but I'm getting anxious for action. Doing nothing is not the best work for soldiers. Times are getting harder than I ever expected to see them. Coffee not to be had. Tea from three to three and a half dollars per pound; sugar twenty to thirty cents per pound. We have now nearly come to living on what we can make at home. All luxuries must be given up and I believe we are all willing to give them up cheerfully provided our end is accomplished vis. we are free from the Yankees. Read Charlotte Bronte's novel, The Professor, this week. What a mind that woman must have had. She-Miss Bronte and Mrs. Browning my two pet heroines must have had many points of character alike. Neither was really happy either in their domestic or literary avocations and while I may admire from a distance and enjoy the efforts of them mightily enough I cannot envy them. Friday Mary Lewis, Nanny, Dave and I walk to town and hear that the carriage has really been bought. What a comfort it will be to us. Get my dress fitted at Mrs. Ayers. Do some other work I have to see to and get home to dinner. Find dear little Sis here. She has come for a visitation this time. Letters from Jabe this week tell us of his promotion as head surgeon to the 17th Mississippi. He will try and take a peep at us in the next week or so. Saturday night Tom (Jabe's servant who has been up on a visit to the home of his boyhood) calls by on his way back to camp to take any parcels or letters we may have for "Master Doctor." Sally and I both write a letter, fix up some books, included a sermon and a bag of apples; hope Jabe may enjoy both sermon and apples. Had a letter from Sam.
Oct. 13-19
No church as the new carriage has not arrived and I've lost my fancy for long walks. Do some reading and have a nice long walk with Aunt Sally in the evening. The fields and woods are now looking so lovely; some slight signs of Fall upon the vista. Nature seems to be trying on her Fall attire. Do some sewing this week. Have a long letter from Sue and sent her one in return. Friday Jabe comes and aren't we glad. I'm so glad to have him at my house this time for a visit of more than one day or night. Invite him up into the Lodge and show him my pictures and books. He and Mary Lewis get on very cousinly terms, take a kiss both at meeting and at departing. We take some pleasant long walks and he, Sally and I have such satisfactory confidential chats to ourselves in the Guest Chamber. A letter from niece Lizzie [Minor]; she tells me her Pa is better and he will try and come up to see us this week if he can. No especial news in the neighborhood. Brother Jim has heard from Sue Stanford Bacon. The letter was an answer to one brother Jim sent by Mr. Morris through Kentucky. Sue could not write anything of The Times, could only express her joy at the good news from home, the first she has had since she left in the Spring.
Oct. 20-26
Go to church for the first time in the new carriage. Jabe, Sally, Mary Lewis and I hear Mr. Norton of the Alexandria refugees ....Monday Jabe, Sally and I go up to Rugby to finish out Jabe's visit and find them all right glad to see me from brother Brown to Cornelia. Tuesday Gen. Buc, Jabe's dog, comes up and we make his acquaintance and find him quite a well mannered dog and very good looking too. It is really funny to see Jabe petting him; pays Buc much more attention than any of the little children. News comes on Tuesday of battle at Leesburg on yesterday-21st. The victory was again ours. The papers report a large loss on the Federal side; on ours 300 including killed and wounded. Jabe's brigade was engaged. I'm sorry he was not at his post as he might have had opportunity to be noticed. He gets off on Wednesday so sister Betty, Sally and I go to the Depot to say good bye. I'm sorry we did go for the scene I there witnessed made it all the harder to say good bye. A poor woman came down on one train and her husband's corpse was brought down on the other. They met at the Depot. The distress of the poor wife was heart rending. She was on her way to nurse him and did not know of his death until she met his remains on the cars. She had a little infant in her arms, a few months old. Hers is but one of the many many sad hearts made desolute by this cruel war. After dinner, Sister Betty and I go to see cousin Lucy Terril. I'm introduced to Mr. Peters, the wounded soldier. Thursday I meet Ma in [MISSING]
She is talking of a visit home; sent up a pretty Setter puppy to Daddy. Everyone in the house claims it and names it, consequently the poor dog's name is not decided upon for some time. A letter from brother Jim and with it some money. No news yet. They are expecting to see Mr. Coffman soon as his company has been transferred somewhere East. I would like to see him play the lover. Mary Lewis comes home Thursday. We are glad to have her back again. Ginny was not married [as] Mr. Tompkins did not appear. The times are more cheering than they have been yet. The papers say the late storms scattered the Yankee's Armada with several vessels lost. The war is getting very unpopular North with the masses. Oh, that this terrible war may be brought to a speedy termination!
Nov. 10-16
Dave spent yesterday at Uncle Bob's and comes home early this morning and brings good news. Sister Mary has a little daughter born Nov. 9, 1861, I suppose last night. Ellen Lewis writes me a note to tell me, the good news. Now a new niece born in The Southern Confederacy during the administration of Jeff Davis. Hope if she lives, she may prove a true saint, a great woman. On Sunday hear Mr. Norton preach .... a lovely sermon ....He sought to prove that those who called themselves Christians had not sufficient faith and trust in the power of His might now in this time of trouble; that the great multitudes of Christians now in the Valley of Decision were passing though a fiery furnance and while many would fall many would come forth seven times purified. I wish some of our soldier boys could have heard it. It might have brought comfort to their ears ....Ma is off on a visit. Make Met a new Cap; not pleasant work. Sally very poorly in health and spirits. Friday the 15th [is] the fast day appointed by President Davis. Sally and I take a walk to town escorted by Dave on foot and Daddy on Pat horse; have a hard time. Ma gets home Saturday and brings word they have a sick family at Music Hall; measles and fever and other ailments. David Crocket [a servant] is very ill with fever. The baby is to be called Annie Laurie after her two grandmothers. Brother Jim and some of the children wanted her called after me but the majority were in favor of honoring the Grandmothers. Brother Jim thinks Sally and I had better not come down now as we could be of no use in the way of nursing and there is danger of our taking the fever. I feel much trouble about them all to think of the dreaded measles and so many to have them; all the children and most of the servants. But we must not grieve too much o'er coming evils but trust all to Him who does not willingly afflict any of his people.
Nov. 17-23
At church and hear a Mr. Quimby [give] a very practical discourse. Letters this week from Bob and Sam. They are both at Centerville. Sam's brigade is now stationed there. Bob has been detailed from his company to the commissary department and was left at Centerville while his company went on to Leesburg. Both were in good spirits; seem to have an earnest desire to see home and its inmates once again. I hate to think of Xmas coming and our boys so far off and likely to be at that season of festive merriment. For my part I would like Xmas to pass unheeded for there will be so many missing and so much to sadden us all. Sally and I walk to sister Betty's on Friday and stay until Sunday. It was a long walk for two such feeble people as Sis and I but we felt no inconvenience from it and had a nice visit. All the household was glad to see us .....[Visits made.] We them call at the Delevan to see Lizzie Dee. She seems much pleased at the sight of me; says to see any of her kin and home friends does her so much good. She spends Saturday night at Sister Betty's with me and we have much to talk of. She tells me of her work, its heights and shadows; seems to be happy though there are trials connected with it but she says so long as she feels and sees that she can do any good she means to persevere and truly she will have her reward. The cup of cold water that she administers to poor suffering humanity will, I doubt not, be returned to her sevenfold. Her deeds of love and mercy are all recorded by One who never allows a word or deed of kindness to go unrewarded. Find a merry party at Rugby Saturday night ....Have some nice music. Brother Brown has a corn shucking so it would be hard to decide whether there was more noise in or out of doors. News! Edward Mead and Emily Burgoyne were married this week. What a funny match, as sister Mary would say.
Nov. 24-30
At church in the morning and hear Mr Meade. A regular stir up (the Sunday after Stir Up Sunday) about the indifference shown to attending church; such a slight excuse serves so often to keep one from church. He was right. After church Mary Lewis and I go to Dr. Leitchs to stay until Monday. After dinner little Sis joins us and we have a nice time together. Go to church after supper and hear Mr. Nelson....I'm very poorly after I return. Dr. Leitch sends me up a composing draught which quiets me for the night and am better by the morning. Walk home Monday to dinner and get to work. Little Sis does not return with me; she goes back to sister Betty's but promises to come to me again next week if all is well. Get along nicely with my work. Make a dress for Mammy Nelly and work up all the materials for the calico quilt. A letter from Jabe. His Regiment is now about two miles from Leesburg and he wants to come to us for Xmas and then take Sally back with him; is anxious for me to go too but the old folks won't hear of it so I don't expect to see camp this winter. [He] reports General Beauregard is sick. Consoles with me on the death of my pet Peck. He thinks I ought to find much comfort in knowing he Peck died in harness. A martyr to the rat cause, he died battling bravely in a cause to which he had been early dedicated. Wrote Sue a long letter. A letter from brother Jim. Good news! Crocket is better though not yet out of danger and no new cases of measles and as now two weeks have passed since the first, hope the rest have escaped it. Brother Jim thinks of coming up Monday if the invalids continue better and writes for me to met him at Rugby Monday night as he wants to see something of me and he can only call by on his way home. I must try and get there from Church on Sunday ....Mary Lewis and I read a good deal in "Motley." Work on the quilts. Expect to get out of work this winter; not finish the quilts but work up the materials I have on hand. The times are rather gloomy. Yankees getting all around us; our commissioners, Mason and Slidell, prisoners in Fort Monroe. It is so doubtful if England notices the insult offered by boarding her vessel and taking off the Southern Commissioners. For a similar offense, she fought the War of 1812 but as policy not regard for the right governs The Court of St. James it is doubtful whether she resents this insult or not.
Dec. 1-7
Hear Mr Meade preach ....a good sermon. Advent Sunday and communion day. Go afterwards with little Sis to Rugby to meet brother Jim by his appointment Monday night. I'm glad to be with my sisters. On Monday Sally and I go out visiting ....How much pleasanter this life would seem if we would all study good natures, always to have a kind word for our fellows brings It don't cost anything and how much lighter hearted we feel after a friendly greeting. Sally, sister Betty and I suffer a severe disappointment in the non-arrival of brother Jim at the time appointed. We look for him until dark. There is one comfort, it may be a pleasure deferred. We hope for some day this week. Brother Brown brings us home Tuesday evening and go to my usual work-teaching, reading and sewing. Walk to town one day this week. Good news from Jabe. He hopes to get a leave of absence for 30 days soon so we hope to have him with us at Xmas. Wrote a long letter to Bob and had one from Sue. She is talking of coming up soon ....[Other letters written.] Poor little Sis has such a terrible headache tonight; not able to appear at supper ....
Dec. 8-14
Hear Mr. Quimby [preach.] I like the sermon. Say good bye to dear little Sis with a heavy heart. Oh, how I wish we could be together all the time. Feel blue when I get home; try hard to shake it off. Monday just as I finish school brother Jim's carriage drives up. He stops long enough for me to fix up to go with him to Rugby and to get a snack from him and Tommy [his son, Thomas S. Minor.] We stop in town to do some shopping for sister Mary. Brother Jim reports her as well; tells me Annie Laurie is fast growing into the good graces of her kin. Lizzie did not know what to do about her at first, she has no fancy for infants but her little sister is gaining ground in her love and good opinion. Sister Mary sends for Sally and I to spend Xmas with her and we want to go but feel troubled about going right into the fever. John and Crocket [slaves] both have it now. Hope; however, they may be much better and no new cases and then we may visit during the Xmas week or else soon after. Oh, how shocked I was to see brother Jim's altered looks; face so thin, eyes sunken and a stoop in his shoulders, quite like an old man. It makes my heart ache to think about him. I'm so uneasy and troubled. I must go to him as soon as possible. So glad to be with little Sis again. We enjoy ourselves. Brother Jim and I have much talk of each other, business, family matters and every day concerns. Arrange some money matters. Stay at Rugby until Wednesday when we go back to Pantops. He takes a snack and then is off for home. I go to my work, school, sewing etc, etc. Mary Lewis, Nanny, Dave and I walk to town one morning this week and do some shopping. I get a new silk dress to answer in the place of calico. Meet my two sisters and have a chat and a laugh. No news as yet from Jabe; hope he shall turn up in the next day or so. Write Sue a long letter and a letter from her this week. She has set tomorrow week to come up. I want to see her very much. A letter from Bob. He has seen Jabe.
Dec. 15-21
At church and hear Mr S1ack ....A beautiful sermon and suitable for the season, Advent, the coming of our Lord .... See little Sis; no Jabe yet but she has heard from him and he has not yet gotten a leave of absence, which is the cause of his delay. Mentions having seen several of the Albemarle boys. Sue writes she may be up this week. I do some work, make my dress. Am also poorly. Hear on Sunday of another victory for us over the Yankees, a Battle on the Allegheny at Ghost Mountain on the 13th. Our loss small compared with the Yankees. News from England. She demands the surrender of Mason and Slidell. What is to be the next move I wonder? Conjecture is busy at work; can but hope it may lead to a rupture between Johnathan and John Bull. A letter from Music Hall. Brother Jim is in bed. The servants are better. Mr. Coffman is with them as his company has disbanded. I'm very poorly. On Friday Jabe appears. He got to Rugby on Tuesday. He spends the day with me and is looking much better than when last with us. He has a furlough for 20 days so I hope to see much of him. Saturday Sue and John come ....but John has to leave the next day. He has a right hard time of it. Had hoped Jabe and Sally would have joined us today but they do not come. Hear afterwards they go to brother Jim's as he is thought so poorly. Hear we have had a small fight at a place called Dranesville in the neighborhood of Centerville on Friday 20th in which a small number of our forces were engaged against three or four times their number of the cavalry in which we were considerbly worsted. We hear it is thought as many as a 150 killed and wounded. The loss of the enemy is supposed not to be as large. Hope that estimate may reach us soon.
Dec. 22-28
At church to hear Dr. Quimby....I'm so unhappy about brother Jim; hear he continues poorly. Monday go up to Rugby to meet Sally and Jabe who come back from Music Hall on that day. They leave brother Jim more comfortable. We decide to go down to him the first of next week. Hope Sue will decide to go with us. Spend Xmas Eve at Rugby. The nieces have some beaux, a dance, some games, an eggnog and altogether a gay time. I'm happy to be with my sisters and brothers but can't get up anything like gaiety. That feeling has long since departed ....Xmas Day go to church and hear Dr. Harold....The church is very pretty with the Xmas greens. The motto "The Prince of Peace." After church leave the Rugbyites and go home. Such a quiet Xmas, even the children seem to make less noise. Beautiful weather which I'm glad of on the darkies account. Sally and Jabe dine with us on Friday. I enjoy them as a matter of course but they are not to stay all night. Decide upon a meeting at the Depot in town on Monday morning to take cars for Music Hall. Sue and I think of spending Sunday night with Cousin Lou so as to be on the spot Monday morning. No improvement in brother Jim. Jabe takes up his pickle with him. We are having such happy times with Sue. Can't help thinking and grieving very much about brother Jim's sickness. I fear I am not long to have him with me; he is soon to be called to his rest. May my Father in Heaven help me to bear up under this heavy burden without murmuring and to feel in my heart His will be done. Finish [John] Motley's Rise of the Dutch Republic; it is deeply interesting. Mary Lewis and I read most of it aloud.
Dec. 29 -31
Sunday at church and hear Dr. Harold.... Sue and I go to Cousin Lou's to spend the night but after dinner she has a message from home that John has come up and the carriage is sent for her so I'm left all by myself. Have a pleasant night with cousin Lou and Nanny. Meet Jabe and Sally at the Depot the next evening and in due time arrive at Music Hall. Find the invalids more comfortable. Brother Jim looks very badly but he thinks there may be some improvement in his case from strong drink. He is confined to the sitting room; rides out warm days but is very feeble. Sister Mary is in the dining room to her meals. The new niece is a little beauty, minus Tommy's nose but there is room and time for improvement in that. Sam comes to us Tuesday and altogether we have a select party. Our friends call. We have invitations to go out. All hands from Uncle Bob's and the well ones from Music Hall meet at The Creek one night to welcome Jimmy home; have a gay time. We have eggnog and oysters. Jimmy seems but little changed to me; is the same gay hearted boy that he left and seems so happy to be at home. Sally, Jabe, Sam and I dine one day at Kinloch ....Leave Sam all night and I go back with Jabe and Sally. We expect to have a frolic at Uncle Bob's Saturday night but the weather is too bad to go out. Finish off, with Sam's help, Jabe's monkey cap. He is pleased with it; hope it may be a comfort to him during this cold weather while in camp. We have a call on way from Gen. Buc, assisted by Tom. I had forgotten to say that Lizzie Dee was down .... The New Year! Ah, such a feeling of hopelessness comes over me, a dread of looking forward, as though the burden of looked for trials were more than I could stand up under but this is sinful. Where is my Faith in that Strong Arm which can make every cross light?
And an earnest need for prayer."
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