 | The Eunuch |  |
Scen. 3.
Chæ.I am undone she's no where to be seene:
And I that lost sight of her am lost too.
Where may I search? where hunt? whom aske? what way
Take? I haue no direction; but I haue this hope left
71
Beautifull face! hence forward I do blot
Out of the table of my fantasie
All other women: and do fall to loath
These common beauties.
Par.
Marke this yonker too!
I know not what he talkes to himselfe of loue.
Oh my most vnfortunate old master!
Why this is such a hotspurre, if he take
To wenching once, youle thinke his brothers course
meere trickes and gambads in comparison
Of what his furious rage will venture on.
Chæ.
Oh all you gods and goddesses confound
That same old dotard stay'd me on my way;
Let them plague me too, that did deigne to stay:
And further would not slight him. But behold
Here's Parmeno: well met.
Par.
Why are you sad?
Or about what so earnest? whither going?
Chæ.
Troth I not know, nor whither, nor bout what;
I am so vtterly beside my selfe.
Par.
Why how comes this?
Chæ.
I am in loue man.
Par.
How?
Chæ.
Now Parmeno make proofe, what dwels in thee.
Thou knowst thou oftentimes hast promist me,
Bidding me thinke of something I desired;
And thou wouldst shew how thou couldst pleasure me.
And this thou offerdst, when I secretly
Brought to the seller all our victualls to thee.
Par.
Peace idlesbee.
Chæ.
Now on my part tis sound
What I desire let me thy promise find.
Besides it is an action of that value,
Whereon thou mayst spend thy best sweat and labor.
This wench is nothing like our Citie Mammals,
Whom their mothers striue to make low shoulderd;
And lace hard in, to make 'hem appeare slender:
If any grow a little fleshlier
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That be they of naturall temper ere so good,
They tamper 'hem to forme of reedes or rushes:
And therefore they are made much on.
Par.
What on yours?
Chæ.
Face af a rare proportion.
Par.
Excellent!
Chæ.
Colour her owne plumpe body; full of mettle.
Par.
Her yeares??
Chæ.
About sixteene.
Par.
The very prime.
Chæ.
Procure her me by force stelth, or intreatie;
I weigh not which way, so I may enioy her.
Par.
Of what condition is she?
Chæ.
Troth I know not.
Par.
Of whence.
Chæ.
Nor that.
Par.
Where dwels she?
Chæ.
As little, that.
Par.
Where saw you her?
Chæ.
Passing a long the street.
Par.
How lost?
Chæ.
That was chafing with my selfe
Iust now as I came hither: neither thinke I
Ther's any liuing on, to whom good happes
Offering well at first, do end more thwartly.
Par.
What mischiefe hath falne out?
Chæ.
Oh me accurst!
Par.
Why, what's the matter?
Chæ.
Aske thou? knowst thou not.
My fathers kinsman, Archidemides?
A man much of his yeares?
Par.
What else?
Chæ.
Whil'st I
Follow the maiden, he comes iust vpon me.
Par.
Vnseasonably o' my word.
Chæ.
Nay verily
Vnluckely. The word vnseasonable
Fits other chances better Parmeno.
I may sweare safe, this sixe or seuen moneths
Last past, I nere happend to see the man;
But now when least I would, or had lesse neede.
Seemes it not strange, how thinkst thou?
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Yes, y' faith.
Chæ.
As distant as he was he huddled to me,
Bow-bent, palsey-handed, blabber-lipt, cough-strangled:
Ho, ho, stay, Chærea (sayes he) Chærea stay;
Chærea to thee I speake: knowes thou my errand?
What is it, say I to him? marrie—marrie—
And halfe an houre after gruntles to me
I haue a triall to be heard to morrow—
And what of that, say I? he answers me
see that thou tell thy father carefully,
That he remember to be early ready
To pleade my cause. This our dialogisme
Tooke vp an houre of time, I askt what else?
No more saies he. I left him; looking backward
To spie the maid, she ith' meane time had turnd
downe this way to our street.
Par.
Tis tenne to one
But he meanes her, that was now brought to Thais.
Chæ.
When I come hither, she's not to be seene.
Par.
Did any companie attend the wench?
Chæ.
Yes, a Parasite and a maid seruant.
Par.
Tis she: Cast of your care: all now is quiet.
Chæ.
Thou talkest from the purpose.
Par.
Nay, but minde the businesse now in hand:
Chæ.
Say doost know her? or sawest her?
Par.
Saw, know her, know where she is?
Chæ.
Oh my sweete Parmeno knowst her?
Par.
I do know her.
Chæ.
And where she is?
Par.
Here, brought to the harlot Thais,
And giuen her for a gift.
Chæ.
Who is so potent
To giue such gifts?
Par.
Thraso the souldier,
Your brother Phædria's riuall.
Chæ.
Thou declar'st
But a hard case my brother stands in then.
Par.
Yould say so indeede, if you had seene the present
Which he prouides to send in counterpoise.
Chæ.
Prithe, what ist?
Par.
An Eunuch.
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What, that driule,
That filthy fellow he brought yesterday?
The old man-woman?
Par.
I, the very same.
Chæ.
Hele be coited out o'doores with's present.
But I nere knew, this Thais was our neighbour
Par.
She has not long beene.
Chæ.
I'm a fellow of nothing.
Strange, I should nere haue seene her? but doost heare?
Is she so faire, as she's reported for?
Par.
Yes sure.
Chæ.
But not to be compar'd to mine?
Par.
Tis otherwise.
Chæ.
I prithe Parmeno
Worke that I may obtaine her.
Par.
Ile see toot:
Ile studie for your furtherance and helpe. Command you
me ought else?
Chæ.
Whether now go'st thou?
Par.
Home; to conuey those seruants vnto Thais.
As late your brother chargd me.
Chæ.
Oh blessed Eunuch!
Who is to be there placed in that house.
Par.
Wherein so blest?
Chæ.
Wherein, demandest thou?
That euer has so faire a fellow seruant
To looke on; talke to; vnder the same roofe
Be still with her; sometimes take meales with her?
Sometimes sleepe nigh her?
Par.
What if now your selfe
May be made happie?
Chæ.
Wherein Parmeno?
Par.
Say. Tak's clothes
Chæ.
His clothes? what thence
Will follow?
Par.
Ile lead y'in 'stead.
Chæ.
I note.
Par.
Ile say y'are hee.
Chæ.
I apprehend thee
Par.
You may then enioy
The benefits, which now you said he should;
be present, eate, touch, play, and lie close by her:
Seeing none of'hem do know you, what you are.
Beside your face and yeares are such, you may
Passe easilie for an Eunuch.
Chæ.
Excellent.
I neuer in my life heard better counsell.
Let's in; and helpe to dresse me presently.
Leade me, carrie me, with all speede thou canst.
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What mean'st? troth I but ieasted.
Chæ.
Thou wast's time in prating.
Par.
I haue cast my selfe away.
What haue I done wretch? whither thrust you me?
Will you now force me? Sir I warne you stay.
Chæ.
Let's goe.
Par.
Persist you?
Chæ.
I am fully bent toot.
Par.
Foresee, if th'course be not to hot for vs.
Chæ.
Tis not I warrant thee, let's on.
Par.
I, but
This beane will sure be threshed on my shoulders.
Oh tis a hainous practise we attempt.
Chæ.
A hainous figge: is that a hainous practise,
If I be brought in a baudie house,
And there returne their owne vpon these gibets
And plagues of men? which alwayes hold our youth
In such contempt, and alwayes worke our torment?
If I do now put a like tricke vpon 'hem,
As we by them are still guld? or else rather
Ist fit, we still take their wronges patiently?
I say tis fit I put the ieast vpon her.
Who'l blame me that shall heare on't? euery man
Will say, I fitted 'hem a peniworth
Par.
What meanes all this? If you be so resolu'd
You may go on. But pray you sir hereafter
Lay not the fault on me.
Chæ.
I will not.
Par.
You
Command me then?
Chæ.
Command, charge and compell.
Par.
Ile nere (decline then) your authoritie.
Exeunt Parmeno and Chærea.
Follow.
Chæ.
The powers diuine prosper our course.
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