 | The Eunuch |  |
76
Act. 3.
Scen. 1.
Enter Thraso, and Gnato.Thr.
Did Thais (saiest thou) giue me such great thanks?
Gna.
Huge thankes sir.
Thr.
And glad saist? ha?
Gna.
Not so much for the gifts worth, as that it came
From you: that's her hearts pride sir.
Enter Parmeno and keepe aloofe.
Par.
I come forth to see
How time serues for conueiance of my present.
But lo the souldier.
Thr.
My kinde destenie
Sure of a child bestow'd this gift vpon me,
That all I do becomes most acceptable.
Gna.
Truly I note so much.
Thr.
The King himselfe
Still vsed to giue me singular great thankes
For all I did; to other men not so.
Gna.
The man that hath braine in him doth deriue
Oft times the glorie earn'd by others sweate
Vpon himselfe: a thing that's rife in you.
Thr.
Thou hast it.
Gna.
Therefore the King
still wore you—
Thra.
I,
Gna.
In his eye.
Thra.
True: gaue the ouersight
Of all his forces, all his plots to me.
Gna.
Rare!
Thr.
Then, if wearinesse at any time
Of men, or tediousnesse of businesse
Possest him; when he minded to be priuate,
Would—as it were—thou feelst me?
Gna.
Yes when he would
Vnloade his minde—as twere—of care.
Thr.
Yes, then
He would retire with me alone to banquet.
Gna.
ô strange! you do describe a rare choise King.
Thr.
I, he's a man of very few mens stampe.
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Rather of none's if he conuerse with you.
Thra.
All men enuied me; closely snapt at me;
I thus regard'hem; all (I say) bare me ill:
But one most deadly, whom the King had made
Oreseer of his Indian Elephants.
He at a time being ouer sawsie with me,
What said I to him, take you boldnesse Strato,
Because you haue command ouer the beastes?
Gna.
So helpe me God, an exlent wittie iest:
Oh singular! this was a wipe vnto him.
Ah! and what he?
Thr.
Strooke dumbe.
Gna.
How could he chuse?
Par.
Your faith good gods! desperate fellow, caitife,
Churchrobber.
Thr.
I but what thinkst thou Gnato.
Of that same ieast, wherewith I girded once
A youth of Rhodes being at dinner with me?
Did I nere tell't thee?
Gna.
Neuer: I pray tell it.
I haue heard it told aboue a thousand times.
Thr.
This Rhodian I speake of, a raw young strippling
Sat once at banquet with me: when by chance
I had my harlot with me: This greene nouice
Began to speake broad: how now impudence,
Say I to him, art thou thy selfe hare-haunched
And hunt'st for ven'son.
Gna.
ha, ha, he.
Thra.
How ist?
Gna.
Conceited, clearely, smooth, not to be mended
For Gods loue was't your iest? I thought it old.
Thr.
Hast heard it?
Gna.
Oft, abroad it beares the bell
For a prime wittie one.
Thr.
Twas mine.
Gna.
Alas,
Rash headlesse youth.
Par.
Now the gods confound thee.
Gna.
For Gods sake what did he?
Thr.
Blasted. All there
Were readie euery man to burst with laughter:
And in conclusion all gan now feare me.
Gna.
I could not blame 'hem.
Thr.
But doost heare wert
Best I cleard my selfe to Thais, of this maid:
For that she stands in iealousie I loue her?
78
At no hand: rather striue to increase her doubt.
Thr.
Why?
Gna.
Aske you? find you not, if any time
She do commend or mention Phædria,
How it does vex you?
Thr.
Yes.
Gna.
To preuent that
This is your onely remedie. When she
Names Phædria to you, do you presently
Name Pamphila: if she at any time
Say, let vs haue home Phædria to banquet,
Reply you, call in Pamphila to sing:
In fine, giue like for like, to nettle her
Thr.
I, if she lou'd me, this might further Gnato.
Gna.
Seing she expects and loues what you do giue her,
She long since loueth you; you haue long since
Easily got the starte how you may grieue her.
Sheel alwayes stand in aw, least any time
Vpon offence tane youl bestow elsewhere
That benefit, she now doos reape from you
Thr.
Tis right thou saist. Strange, 't came not to my
Minde?
Gna.
That is a ieast indeed; because you bent not
Your mind ont: or else Thraso what rare straine
Had it produc'd, if minted in your braine.
Enter Thais and Pythias her maid, with other wenches attending.
Scen. 2.
Tha.Me thought, I ene now heard the souldiers tongue
See where he is: Thraso my friend, well met.
Thr.
Oh my deare Thais, my delight, how doost thou?
Do you a little loue me for your Minstrell?
Par.
What a sweete proper handsell has he giu'n her
At the first onset.
Tha.
Much for your deseruing:
Gna:
Then let's to supper. Why here stay you?
Par.
Marke tother Wiseacre too. A man may iudge
He was of a mans getting.
Tha.
When you please,
I am in readinesse.
Par.
Ile go toward 'hem,
And make as if I now but new came forth.
Are you to go foorth any whither Thais?
79
ô Parmeno, well done: yes indeede to day.
I am to go abroad.
Par.
Pray whither?
Tha.
Seest thou not
The man There?
Par.
Yes, withall his presence irkes me.
Those presents from my Master Phædria
Are ready when you please.
Thr.
What stay we for?
Why get not hence?
Par.
Pray sir grant truce a while,
I may surrender vp some trifling presents, I also may
Imparle and treate with her.
Thr.
Some goodly present
Sure: nothing like mine.
Par.
The matter selfe will
Shew that. Ho there, bid those two I gaue in charge,
Come quickly forth.
Enter Blackemore Wench and Eunuch.
Come you here forward. This same wench was brought
From Æthiopia.
Thr.
Some three halfe penie purchase,
Gna.
Scarce that.
Par.
Where are you Dorus.
Come you hither. Here is an Eunuch for you: marke
How sweete fac't, of what a blooming age.
Tha.
Now
As God helpe me a handsome youth.
Par.
What say
You to him Gnato? What fault findest thou? or what
Obiects thou Thraso? husht both: sufficient
Commendation. Prooue him in learning, song or
Wrestling: such knowledge fitteth free-borne youth to
Haue, Ile make it cleare appeare he's perfect in.
Thr.
For neede, vnwarm'd with wine I could that Eunuch
Par.
And he that sends you these, doos not require
That you should onely liue to pleasure him;
For his sake, barre all else your company;
Nor bragges his battailes, nor shews forth his scarres;
Nor stands betwixt you and your benefit
As one doos, I could name: but at such times
When he may be iniurious to none,
Your selfe dispos'd, and time conuenient;
If then admitted, he rest's satisfied.
Thr.
This shews he serues some poore & forlorne Master.
Gna.
For no man sure that could procure another
Would indure this.
Par.
Sirra., hold thou thy peace,
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For thou that fram'st thy selfe to claw that thing,
I thinkst mayest feede on fire.
Thr.
Do we yet go?
Tha.
Ile haue but in these first; and leaue some charge
Among my seruants, what I would haue done;
And come out to you streight.
Thr.
Ile depart hence.
Exit Thais with the Eunuch and blackmore.
Gnato do you stay for her.
Par.
I, for it fits not
A generall walke with's mistresse in the streetes.
Thr.
What should I vse a manie words to thee?
Exit Parmeno.
Thou art much like thy Master.
Gna.
Ha, ha, he.
Thr.
What ist thou laughst at?
Gna.
That which now you said,
And the other ieast broke on the Rhodian
Enter Thais.
Came to my mind: But Thais is come foorth.
Thr.
Runne you before and get at home all readie.
Gna.
Content.
Tha.
You Pythias haue a speciall care,
Exit Gnato.
If Chremes chance to call here, you intreate him
To stay; if that he cannot fitly do,
That he would come againe some other time:
If neither that he can, bring him to me.
Pyt.
I will forsooth.
Tha.
But what, what was it else
I was about to say: Oh, haue a care
Vnto the maiden, see you? and keepe home.
Exit Pytheas into her Mistresses house.
Thr.
Let's go.
Tha.
Wenches attend and follow me.
Exeunt Thraso, Thais and her traine.
81
Scen. 3.
Enter Chremes.Chr.
The more I do reuolue things in my minde
Still the more likely arguments I find
That Thais here aimes some shrewd tricke against me;
I see she workes on me so cunningly.
When first she sent for me (if any one
should then haue askt me the occasion
Of businesse twixt vs twaine, I knew no thing
To Answer) being come, with hammering
She fashiond out pretences of my stay:
She had performd religious rites that day
Vnto the gods, and would communicate
A Weightie secret to me: (I then straight
Grew iealous, all this was some cunning straine)
She sits downe by me; cause of talke doth frame
I seeming cold, her speech to this point came,
How long 'twas since my Parents had beene dead?
Long since I told her: then she questioned
If I had land at Sunium? and how farre
It lay from sea? this (I thinke) liketh her:
She hopes to worke it from me. at the last
She drew to this, if I had no young sister
From that place stolne a many yeares now past?
Who then was with her at the time we mist her?
What things she had about her? or if any
Could know her? why should she these questions moue?
vnlesse (as is the impudence of many)
She faine her selfe would that my sister prooue,
Of old so young hence lost? should she suruiue,
Her yeares at most reach not aboue sixteene;
Thais is elder then my selfe, I weene.
She crau'd me againe come to her: let her driue
82
Or leaue this sending: ile not be troubled,
To listen her third errand. Ho, within—
Enter Pythias to her Mistresses doore.
Pyth.
Who's that?
Chr.
One Chremes.
Pyth.
Oh fine little pleasant pate.
Chr.
I still affirme, I am laid for to be catcht.
Pyth.
Thais did earnestly request you would
Returne to morrow.
Chr.
I go into the Country.
Pyth.
Pray y'
Chr.
I say I cannot.
Pyth.
Then remaine here
A while till she come backe.
Chr.
No by no meanes.
Pyth.
Why my kind Chremes?
Chr.
Hence you harlotrie
Pyth.
If such be your determination,
I pray step ouer to her where she is.
Chre.
I care not if I do.
Pyth.
Dorias go straight
And leade this gentleman to his souldiers.
Pythias returnes into her Mistresses house. Dorias enters and go away with Chremes.
Scen. 4.
Enter Antipho.Ant.
Some youthes of vs agreed on yesterday
A feast in Comon mongst vs: Chærea
We made our Steward; rings were giuen; time, place
Set downe; time's past; where it appointed was
Nothing is ready; he not to be seene;
I know not what to say ont, what to weene.
Now all the rest haue laid the taske on me
To seeke him; therefore now Ile first go see
If he be gotten home. But who is that
Comes out of Thais house? is't he or not?
Enter Chær. in the Eunuches cloathes.
83
This his attire? what euill bodes his staring?
I cannot enough wonder, or coniecture.
But what so ere it be, Ile aloofe stand;
And angle for the secret now in hand.
Scen. 5.
Chæ.Is none about the doores? Not one. Doos none
Come yet behind me neither? No not one.
May I not now at pleasure vent my ioy?
Oh Iupiter! now truly is the time
I easilie could brooke to part with life:
Least some insuing wretchednesse thereof
Should hap to soure my present happinesse.
No curious inquisitor now meete me?
That vp and downe would hant me, wearie me,
Kill me with tedious questions, why I skippe thus?
Why am so iocund? Whither I am going?
Or whence do come? in what place got these clothes?
What is my ayme? whither Ime mad or sober?
Ant.
Ile to him, and obtaine the thankes of him
He so desires to part with. Chærea,
Why in such rapture man! whence this attire?
Why art so pleasant? or what aymst thou at?
Art in thy wits? Why starest thou so vpon me?
Why speak'st not?
Chæ.
Oh happie day? ô friend well met.
There's no man liuing, I would rather see
At this time then thy selfe.
Ant.
I prithee, say
What is the matter!
Chæ.
Nay truly I pray thee
Giue me the hearing. Know'st thou not her here
My brother is in loue withall?
Ant.
Yes Thais:
As I do guesse.
Chæ.
The same.
Ant.
So I remember.
Chæ.
A certaine maid was giuen her to day.
What need I blazon or set out to thee
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Thou knowest me choise in such disciphering.
She did inflame my heart.
Ant.
What saist?
Chæ.
thou'lt say
She from the whole sex beares the Bell away,
If euer thou shalt see her. What neede words?
I gan to loue her: by good chance there was
At home an Eunuch which my brother had
bought for this Thais, not then sent to her.
Here our man Parmeno an odde inckling gaue me
Of a deuice, which quickly I laid hold on.
Ant.
What
Chæ.
If you would silent keepe, you would
Know sooner.
First to change cloathes with him, then cause my selfe
To be conueyed for him.
Ant.
What for the Eunuch?
Chæ.
Yes.
Ant.
What aduantage shold you winne thereby?
Chæ.
Mak'st thou a question? I should see, should heare,
Should be with her I loued, Antipho.
Was it a slight cause, or a trifling reason?
I was brought to her; when she had receiued me
She gladly led me home: commits the maid—
Ant.
To whom? To thee?
Chæ.
To me.
Ant.
a sure safeguard.
Chæ.
She chargeth me that no man come to her;
Commands me further, I not start from her;
But that alone I keepe with her alone,
In a close chamber: I say, yes forsooth;
Vpon the ground looking demurely:
Ant.
Caitise.
Chæ.
I am to go now foorth (saies she) to banquet
And with her leades along her maiden seruants,
(A few young nouice wenches left behind
To attend vpon the maid) these presently
Prepare for her to Bathe. I wish them haste
While they make things in readinesse, the maid
Sits in a closet, looking on a table:
Wherein was painted, how that Iupiter
85
I look'd vpon the piece too: and because
He had in former times plaid the like pranke,
My spirits were the more incouraged:
In that a God had taken human shape,
And in gold dew dropping himselfe through tiles
Had closely, finely, wantond with his lemman
And which o'th' Gods had done't? marie the same
Who shakes with thunder heauens high arched frame
Should I wormeling (then) make scruple of it?
I did not, but imbrac'd it willingly.
When this I cast in mind, the maid meane while
Is cal'd for in, to wash: goes, bathes, returnes;
And afterward they lay her in her bed:
I waiting stand if they'ld bid me do ought.
One comes to me, and sayes, you sirra Dorus
Take you this fanne; and thus fanne wind vpon her:
When we haue washt, you (if you will) wash too.
I take it with sad countenance.
Ant.
At that time
I would ha' seene that bashfull face of thine
How thou great Asse didst stand holding a fanne.
Chæ.
She had scarse spoken it, when all together
Hurring out of the roome, depart to Bathe;
And make such noise, as seruants commonly
Are wont to do, when Masters are from home.
Meane while a slumber seases on the maide.
I priuily (thus) on the fannes side do leere,
And looke about too, if all else be cleare:
I saw all safe, and bolted fast the doore.
Ant.
What then?
Chæ.
What then foole?
Ant.
I confesse it.
Chæ.
Should I let slippe such opportunitie,
So profferd, short, wish'd and not hoped for?
I had beene then indeed such as I shewd for.
Ant.
Tis true thou sayest. But in the meane while what's done
86
Chæ.
why all is readie.
Ant.
Thou art carefull: where? at your house?
Chæ.
No at Discus
Our free-mans.
Ant.
Tis farre hence, let's make more haste
Go shift your cloathes.
Chæ.
Where should I go to shift?
Ime lost; from whom I stand as banished;
I doubt my brother may be now within:
Feare also, least my father be returnd
Out of the countrey.
Ant.
Go we to our house,
That's the next place, where you may shift your selfe:
Chæ.
The aduise is good, lets go: withall I minde
To take thy counsell, how I may my loue
Further enioy.
Ant.
Content, our wits will prooue.
Exeunt Chæ. and Antipho.
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