The collected works of Ambrose Bierce | ||
CHARLES AND PETER
Ere Gabriel's note to silence died
All graves of men were gaping wide.
All graves of men were gaping wide.
Then Charles A. Dana, of The Sun
Rose slowly from the deepest one.
Rose slowly from the deepest one.
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“The dead in Christ rise first, 'tis writ,”
Quoth he—“ick, bick, ban, doe,—I'm It!”
Quoth he—“ick, bick, ban, doe,—I'm It!”
(His headstone, footstone, counted slow,
Were “ick” and “bick,” he “ban” and “doe”:
Were “ick” and “bick,” he “ban” and “doe”:
Of beating Nick the subtle art
Was part of his immortal part.)
Was part of his immortal part.)
Then straight to Heaven he took his flight,
Arriving at the Gates of Light.
Arriving at the Gates of Light.
There Warden Peter, in the throes
Of sleep, lay roaring in the nose.
Of sleep, lay roaring in the nose.
“Get up, you sluggard!” Dana cried—
“I've an engagement there inside.”
“I've an engagement there inside.”
The Saint arose and scratched his head.
“I recollect your face,” he said,
“I recollect your face,” he said,
“(And, pardon me, 'tis rather hard)
But—” Dana handed him a card.
But—” Dana handed him a card.
“Ah, yes, I now remember—bless
My soul, how dull I am!—yes, yes,
My soul, how dull I am!—yes, yes,
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“Walk in. But I must tell you this:
We've nothing better here than bliss.
We've nothing better here than bliss.
“We've rest and comfort, though, and peace.”
“H'm—puddles,” Dana said, “for geese.
“H'm—puddles,” Dana said, “for geese.
“Have you in Heaven no Hell?” “Why no,”
Said Peter, “nor, in truth, below.
Said Peter, “nor, in truth, below.
“'Tis not included in our scheme—
'Tis but a preacher's idle dream.”
'Tis but a preacher's idle dream.”
The great man slowly moved away.
“I'll call,” he said, “another day.
“I'll call,” he said, “another day.
“On earth I played it, o'er and o'er,
And Heaven without it were a bore.”
And Heaven without it were a bore.”
“O, stuff!—come in. You'll make,” said Pete,
“A Hell where'er you set your feet.”
“A Hell where'er you set your feet.”
The collected works of Ambrose Bierce | ||