 | The Poems of St. George Tucker of Williamsburg, Virginia 1752-1827 |  |
A Trip to St. James's, 1794
Lend me thy trumpet Fame! thy brazen lungs,
Thine hundred mouths, and eke thine hundred tongues!
My liver swells with vehement desire,
To tell such things as scarce will be believed;
Namely, the wonders that have been achieved,
Without the aid of sword or fire,
But in a modest, decent, civil way,
By our Extraordinary Envoy, Mr. Jay.
Thine hundred mouths, and eke thine hundred tongues!
My liver swells with vehement desire,
To tell such things as scarce will be believed;
Namely, the wonders that have been achieved,
Without the aid of sword or fire,
But in a modest, decent, civil way,
By our Extraordinary Envoy, Mr. Jay.
108
Say, muse, 'midst what acclaims he did set out,
Attended down to Whitehall stairs,
By thousands in their Sunday airs;
Who when he got on shipboard gave a shout:
The mighty blast filled the Ohio's sails,
Then homeward all the shouters turned their tails,
And left the ship in charge of Mr. Jay,
To sea-girt Britain's coast to make her way.
Attended down to Whitehall stairs,
By thousands in their Sunday airs;
Who when he got on shipboard gave a shout:
The mighty blast filled the Ohio's sails,
Then homeward all the shouters turned their tails,
And left the ship in charge of Mr. Jay,
To sea-girt Britain's coast to make her way.
Swift as an arrow from an Indian's bow,
The ship across the Atlantic shot,
Swifter than ever ship was known to go,
And of her destination hit the very spot;
As proud of such immortal honor
As our great Envoy laid upon her;
Then to New York came straightway back to tell,
That in her charge she had succeeded well.
The ship across the Atlantic shot,
Swifter than ever ship was known to go,
And of her destination hit the very spot;
As proud of such immortal honor
As our great Envoy laid upon her;
Then to New York came straightway back to tell,
That in her charge she had succeeded well.
Now muse, let us return to Mr. Jay,
Who safe to London city found his way;
With ceremonial due then went to greet
Grenville's new lord, and Billy Pitt likewise,
Who viewed the Envoy Ex with wondering eyes,
Wondering what brought his Ex to Downing street;
Then promised soon to show him to the king,
To whom he might unfold the tidings he did bring.
Meantime Lord Grenville asks his Ex to dine,
An honor which his Ex could not decline:
There cheek by jowl with lords he sits in state,
With due decorum emptying every plate;
Then dinner done, the loyal glasses ring,
With loyal bumpers crowned, to George the king.
Now mount, O muse, on eagle's wings,
Attend with Mr. Jay the King of Kings.
Who safe to London city found his way;
With ceremonial due then went to greet
Grenville's new lord, and Billy Pitt likewise,
Who viewed the Envoy Ex with wondering eyes,
Wondering what brought his Ex to Downing street;
Then promised soon to show him to the king,
To whom he might unfold the tidings he did bring.
Meantime Lord Grenville asks his Ex to dine,
An honor which his Ex could not decline:
There cheek by jowl with lords he sits in state,
With due decorum emptying every plate;
Then dinner done, the loyal glasses ring,
With loyal bumpers crowned, to George the king.
Now mount, O muse, on eagle's wings,
Attend with Mr. Jay the King of Kings.
The day was come, the weather wonderous fair,
When with Lord Grenville to St. James' Court
His Ex the Extra-Envoy did repair,
Of's errand and himself to make report.
When with Lord Grenville to St. James' Court
His Ex the Extra-Envoy did repair,
Of's errand and himself to make report.
109
The monarch saw—and turning to the queen,
“Look, look, there's Jay, there's Jay, there's Jay, I ween
From Congress come to make a bow;
I wonder if the dog knows how?”
His Ex advanced and made a bow by rule,
Which showed he had been at a dancing school;
“Look, look, there's Jay, there's Jay, there's Jay, I ween
From Congress come to make a bow;
I wonder if the dog knows how?”
His Ex advanced and made a bow by rule,
Which showed he had been at a dancing school;
The monarch then returned a monarch's nod,
Awful, no doubt, as the Olympian God;
When thus, in humble tone of supplication,
Did Mr. Jay begin his smooth oration.
Awful, no doubt, as the Olympian God;
When thus, in humble tone of supplication,
Did Mr. Jay begin his smooth oration.
“O Sire! permit a wight thy subject born,
His fellow subjects' sufferings to impart,
Nor from their wailings turn thine ear in scorn,
Like Egypt's king of old, of hardened heart.
His fellow subjects' sufferings to impart,
Nor from their wailings turn thine ear in scorn,
Like Egypt's king of old, of hardened heart.
“I did not like Moses come, with threats to fright,
Or daunt with spells and charms thy royal breast;
Our unfledged eagle, all too young for fight,
Sits, like the peaceful Halcyon, in its nest.
Or daunt with spells and charms thy royal breast;
Our unfledged eagle, all too young for fight,
Sits, like the peaceful Halcyon, in its nest.
“She, like the peaceful Halcyon, went to glide
(If true the tale that's told of other times)
Borne on the azure bosom of the tide,
From shore to shore, from clime to distant climes.
(If true the tale that's told of other times)
Borne on the azure bosom of the tide,
From shore to shore, from clime to distant climes.
“But mews and seagulls now disturb her rest,
And boobies strike her with their jobbernowls;
Voracious sharks assault her peaceful nest,
And warlike swordfish pierce it full of holes.
And boobies strike her with their jobbernowls;
Voracious sharks assault her peaceful nest,
And warlike swordfish pierce it full of holes.
“Thou, who like Neptune, dost the trident sway,
Alone can'st quell those monsters of the main:
O! let thy clemency shine forth we pray,
And halcyon days prolong thy glorious reign!”
Alone can'st quell those monsters of the main:
O! let thy clemency shine forth we pray,
And halcyon days prolong thy glorious reign!”
110
Meanwhile, a gracious ear the monarch lent
To Mr. Jay, and eke his compliment,
To which he condescended such reply,
As Billy Pitt dictated, by the bye.
Next to the queen his Ex did make his leg,
And with the king her intercession beg;
To Mr. Jay, and eke his compliment,
To which he condescended such reply,
As Billy Pitt dictated, by the bye.
Next to the queen his Ex did make his leg,
And with the king her intercession beg;
To which the queen returned two royal dips,
Though not a word escaped her royal lips;
Then to each prince and princess low he bowed,
As demagogue, when he salutes the crowd.
This done, the monarch gave a gracious grin,
And thus familiar question did begin.
Though not a word escaped her royal lips;
Then to each prince and princess low he bowed,
As demagogue, when he salutes the crowd.
This done, the monarch gave a gracious grin,
And thus familiar question did begin.
“Well! since your independence you have got,
Are you much happier than before, or not?
Good salaries, and sinecures! hae, Mr. Jay!
Or are republicans too stingy, pray?
Does Mr. Washington, hae, wear a crown?
No, no, not yet, not yet, you'd knock him down.”
Are you much happier than before, or not?
Good salaries, and sinecures! hae, Mr. Jay!
Or are republicans too stingy, pray?
Does Mr. Washington, hae, wear a crown?
No, no, not yet, not yet, you'd knock him down.”
“Great sir,” cries Mr. Jay, “We han't, as yet,
A head among us that a crown would fit.”
“No, no, I guess not,” instant cried the king,
“His head, I'm sure's not fit for such a thing;
You're all republicans, hae, Mr. Jay,
All sans-culottes, no doubt, aye, aye, aye!”
A head among us that a crown would fit.”
“No, no, I guess not,” instant cried the king,
“His head, I'm sure's not fit for such a thing;
You're all republicans, hae, Mr. Jay,
All sans-culottes, no doubt, aye, aye, aye!”
To which his Extra-Ex did make reply,
In tone so sweet the king could but believe:
“Permit me, sire, your ears to undeceive;
That all are sans-culottes I dare deny,
In tone so sweet the king could but believe:
“Permit me, sire, your ears to undeceive;
That all are sans-culottes I dare deny,
Nor need I further prove what I advance,
Since I am here, O king, and not in France.”
The monarch, half-convinced, exclaimed “Egad!
If you were there, you'd chance to lose your head:
Han't you among you got the guillotine?
Yes, yes, I'm sure you have—myself and queen
Would soon among you all be lopt off short
As wheat in harvest—and as much in sport,
“I'm sure,” cries Mr. Jay, in accents sweet,
Confounded by what majesty had said;
“Your sacred heads, more precious far than wheat,
From scythes, or guillotines have naught to dread.”
Since I am here, O king, and not in France.”
The monarch, half-convinced, exclaimed “Egad!
If you were there, you'd chance to lose your head:
Han't you among you got the guillotine?
Yes, yes, I'm sure you have—myself and queen
Would soon among you all be lopt off short
As wheat in harvest—and as much in sport,
111
Confounded by what majesty had said;
“Your sacred heads, more precious far than wheat,
From scythes, or guillotines have naught to dread.”
“Godso! I doubt it much, upon my life!”
The sputtering monarch quick replied,
“A lowly tailor (can it be denied!)
Among you kicked my son that kissed his wife.”
“That fact,” cries Mr. Jay, “I can't deny.”
“No, no, no, that you can't, I, I, I, I!”
The monarch said, “for Neddy swore 'twas true.
And that the tailor beat him black and blue.”
The sputtering monarch quick replied,
“A lowly tailor (can it be denied!)
Among you kicked my son that kissed his wife.”
“That fact,” cries Mr. Jay, “I can't deny.”
“No, no, no, that you can't, I, I, I, I!”
The monarch said, “for Neddy swore 'twas true.
And that the tailor beat him black and blue.”
The blushing queen here turned her head aside,
Blushing in part with shame, in part with pride;
Each bashful princess hung her lovely head,
And seemed to sympathize with brother Ned.
Blushing in part with shame, in part with pride;
Each bashful princess hung her lovely head,
And seemed to sympathize with brother Ned.
Now Billy Pitt and Grenville's lord began
To fear the monarch might betray the man;
For monarchs can sometimes like parrots talk.
As monkeys, on two legs, like monarchs walk.
To fear the monarch might betray the man;
For monarchs can sometimes like parrots talk.
As monkeys, on two legs, like monarchs walk.
So Grenville plucked the envoy by the sleeve,
And whispered it was time to take his leave.
And whispered it was time to take his leave.
Oct. 1794.
| The Poems of St. George Tucker of Williamsburg, Virginia 1752-1827 | |