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The English and Scottish Popular Ballads

Edited by Francis James Child.

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The Merry Cuckold and Kind Wife
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93

The Merry Cuckold and Kind Wife

OUR GOODMAN—B

[_]

A broadside: Printed and Sold at the Printing-Office in Bow Church-Yard, London.

1

O I went into the stable,
and there for to see,
And there I saw three horses stand,
by one, by two, and by three.

2

O I calld to my loving wife,
and ‘Anon, kind sir!’ quoth she:
‘O what do these three horses here,
without the leave of me?’

3

‘Why, you old cuckold, blind cuckold,
can't you very well see?
These are three milking-cows,
my mother sent to me.’

4

‘Heyday! Godzounds! Milking-cows with bridles and saddles on!
the like was never known!’
Old Wichet a cuckold went out,
and a cuckold he came home.

5

O I went into the kitchen,
and there for to see,
And there I saw three swords hang,
by one, by two, and by three.

6

O I calld to my loving wife,
and ‘Anon, kind sir!’ quoth she:
‘O what do these three swords do here,
without the leave of me?’

7

‘Why, you old cuckold, blind cuckold,
can't you very well see?
They are three roasting-spits,
my mother sent to me.’

8

‘Heyday! Godzounds! Roasting spits with scabbards on!
the like was never known!’
Old Wichet a cuckold went out,
and a cuckold he came home.

9

O I went into the parlour,
and there for to see,
And there I saw three cloaks hang,
by one, by two, and by three.

10

O I calld to my loving wife,
and ‘Anon, kind sir!’ quoth she:
‘O what do these three cloaks do here,
without the leave of me?’

11

‘Why, you old cuckold, blind cuckold,
can't you very well see?
These are three mantuas,
my mother sent to me.’

12

‘Heyday! Godzounds! Mantuas with capes on!
the like was never known!’
Old Wichet a cuckold went out,
and a cuckold he came home.

13

I went into the pantry,
and there for to see,
And there I saw three pair of boots hang,
by one, by two, and by three.

14

O I called to my loving wife,
and ‘Anon, kind sir!’ quoth she
‘O what do these three pair of boots do here,
without the leave of me?’

15

‘Why, you old cuckold, blind cuckold,
can't you very well see?
These are three pudding-bags,
my mother sent to me.’

16

‘Heyday! Godzounds! Pudding-bags with spurs on!
the like was never known!’
Old Wichet a cuckold went out,
and a cuckold he came home.

17

I went into my closet,
and there for to see,
And there I saw three pair of breeches lie,
by one, by two, and by three.

18

O I calld to my loving wife,
and ‘Anon, kind sir!’ quoth she:
‘O what do these three pair of breeches do here,
without the leave of me?’

19

‘Why, you old cuckold, blind cuckold,
can't you very well see?
These are three petticoats,
my mother sent to me.’

94

20

‘Heyday! Godzounds! Petticoats with waistbands on!
the like was never known!’
Old Wichet a cuckold went out,
and a cuckold he came home.

21

I went into the dairy,
and there for to see,
And there I saw three hats hang,
by one, by two, and by three.

22

I calld to my loving wife,
and ‘Anon, kind sir!’ quoth she:
‘Pray what do these three hats do here,
without the leave of me?’

23

‘Why, you old cuckold, blind cuckold,
can't you very well see?
They are three skimming-dishes,
my mother sent to me.’

24

‘Heyday! Godzounds! Skimming-dishes with hat-bands on!
the like was never known!’
Old Wichet a cuckold went out,
and a cuckold he came home.

25

I went into the chamber,
and there for to see,
And there I saw three men in bed lie,
by one, by two, and by three.

26

I called to my loving wife,
and ‘Anon, kind sir!’ quoth she:
‘O what do these three men in bed,
without the leave of me?’

27

‘Why, you old cuckold, blind cuckold,
don't you very well see?
They are three milking-maids,
my mother sent to me.’

28

‘Heyday! Godzounds! Milking-maids with beards on!
the like was never known!’
Old Wichet a cuckold went out,
and a cuckold he came home.