 | A Chapter for Married People. Plain facts for old and young : embracing the natural history and hygiene of organic life. |  |
20. A Chapter for Married People.
IT seems to be a generally prevalent opinion that the marriage ceremony removes all restraint from the exercise of the sexual functions. Few seem to even suspect that the seventh commandment has any bearing upon sexual conduct within the pale of matrimony. Yet if we may believe the confessions and statements of men and women, legalized prostitution is a more common crime than illicit commerce of the sexes. So common is the popular error upon this subject, and so strongly fortified by prejudice, that it is absolutely dangerous for a writer or speaker to express the truth, if he knows it and has a disposition to do so. Any attempt to call attention to true principles is mocked at, decried, stigmatized, and, if possible, extinguished. The author is vilified, and his work is denounced, and relegated to the ragman. Extremist, fanatic, ascetic, are the mildest terms employed concerning him, and he escapes with rare good fortune if his chastity or virility is not assailed.
We are not going to run any such risks, and so shall not attempt to enunciate or maintain any theory. We shall content ourselves with plainly stating established physiological facts by quotations from standard medical authors, leaving each reader to draw conclusions and construct a practical formula for himself.
Object of the Reproductive Functions. — Man, in whatever condition we find him, is more or less depraved. This is true as well of the most cultivated and refined ladies and gentlemen of the great centers of civilization, as of the misshapen denizens of African jungles, or the scarcely human natives of Australia and Terra del Fuego. His appetites, his tastes, his habits, even his bodily functions, are perverted. Of course, there are degrees of depravity and varieties of perversion. In some respects, savages approach more nearly to the natural state than civilized man, and in other particulars, the latter more nearly represents man's natural condition; but in neither barbarism nor civilization do we find man in his primitive state.
In consequence of this universal departure from his original normal condition, — the causes of which we need not here trace, since they are immaterial in the consideration of this question, — when we wish to ascertain with certainty the functions of particular organs of the human body, we are obliged to compare them with the corresponding organs of lower animals, and study the functions of the latter. It is by this method of investigation that most of the important truths of physiology have been developed; and the plan is universally acknowledged to be a proper and logical one.
The Sexual Function in Lower Animals. — Then if we wish to ascertain, with certainty, the true function of the reproductive organs in man, we must pursue the course above indicated; in other words, study the function of reproduction in lower animals. We say lower animals, because man is really an animal, a member of the great animal kingdom, though not a beast, — at
We quote the following paragraphs from one of the most distinguished and reliable of modern physiologists,[29] the facts which he states being confirmed by all other physiologists: — [29] Dalton.
"Every living being has a definite term of life, through which it passes by the operation of an invariable law, and which, at some regularly appointed time, comes to an end. . . . But while individual organisms are thus constantly perishing and disappearing from the stage, the particular kind, or species, remains in existence. . . . This process, by which new organisms make their appearance to take the place of those which are destroyed, is known as the process of reproduction, or generation.
"The ovaries, as well as the eggs which they contain, undergo, at particular seasons, a periodical development, or increase in growth. . . . At the approach of the generative season, in all the lower animals, a certain number of the eggs, which were previously in an imperfect and inactive condition, begin to increase in size, and become somewhat altered in structure."
"In most fish and reptiles, as well as in birds, this regular process of maturation and discharge of eggs takes
Periodical Reproduction. — "In most of the lower orders of animals there is a periodical development of the testicles in the male, corresponding in time with that of the ovaries in the female. As the ovaries enlarge, and the eggs ripen in the one sex, so in the other the testicles increase in size, as the season of reproduction approaches, and become turgid with spermatozoa. The accessory organs of generation, at the same time, share the unusual activity of the testicles, and become increased in vascularity, and ready to perform their part in the reproductive function."
"Each of the two sexes is then at the same time under the influence of a corresponding excitement. The unusual development of the genital organs reacts upon the entire system, and produces a state of peculiar activity and excitability, known as the condition of `erethism.' "
A Lesson from Instinct. — "It is a remarkable fact, in this connection, that the female of these animals will allow the approaches of the male only during and immediately after the œstral period; that is, just when the egg is recently discharged, and ready for impregnation. At other times, when sexual intercourse would be necessarily fruitless, the instinct of the animal leads her to avoid it; and the concourse of the sexes is accordingly made to correspond in time with the maturity of the egg and its aptitude for fecundation."
"The egg, immediately upon its discharge from the ovary, is ready for impregnation. If sexual intercourse happens to take place about that time, the egg and the spermatic fluid meet in some part of the female generative passages, and fecundation is accomplished. . . . If, on the other hand, coitus does not take place, the egg passes down to the uterus unimpregnated, loses its vitality after a short time, and is finally carried away with the uterine secretions."
"It is easily understood, therefore, why sexual intercourse should be more liable to be followed by pregnancy when it occurs about the menstrual epoch than at other times. . . . Before its discharge, the egg is immature, and unprepared for impregnation; and after the menstrual period has passed, it gradually loses its freshness and vitality."
The law of periodicity, as it affects the sexual activity of males of the human species, is indicated in the following remarks by the same author: —
"The same correspondence between the periods of sexual excitement in the male and female, is visible in many of the animals [higher mammals], as well as in fish and reptiles. This is the case in most species which produce young but once a year, and at a fixed period, as the deer and the wild hog. In other species, on the contrary, such as the dog, the rabbit, the guinea-pig, etc., where several broods of young are produced during the year, or where, as in the human subject, the generative epochs of the female recur at short intervals, so that the particular period of impregnation is comparatively indefinite, the generative apparatus of the male is almost always in a state of full development, and is excited to
Summary of Important Facts. — The facts presented in the foregoing quotations from Dr. Dalton may be summarized as follows: —
1. The sexual function is for the purpose of producing new individuals to take the place of those who die, and thus preserve the species from becoming extinct.
2. In the animal kingdom generally, the reproductive function is necessarily a periodical act, dependent upon the development of the reproductive organs of both the male and the female at stated periods.
3. In those exceptional cases in which the organs of the male are in a state of constant development, sexual congress occurs, in lower animals, only at those times when the periodical development occurs in the female.
4. Fecundation of the female element can only take place about the time of periodical development in the female.
5. The desire for sexual congress naturally exists in the female only at or immediately after the time of periodical development.
6. The constant development of the sexual organs in human males is a condition common to all animals in which development occurs in the female at short intervals, and is a provision of nature to secure a fruitful union when the female is in readiness, but not an indication for constant or frequent use.
7. The time of sexual congress is always determined by the condition and desires of the female.
A Hint from Nature. — An additional fact, as stated by physiologists, is that, under normal conditions, the
From these facts the following conclusions must evidently be drawn: —
1. The fact that in all animals but the human species the act can be performed only when reproduction is possible, proves that in the animal kingdom in general the sole object of the function is reproduction. Whether man is an exception, must be determined from other considerations.
2. The fact that the males of other animals besides man, in which the sexual organs are in a state of constant development, do not exercise those organs except for the purpose of reproduction, is proof of the position that the constant development in man is not a warrant for their constant use.
3. The general law that the reproductive act is performed only when desired by the female, is sufficient ground for supposing that such should be the case with the human species also.
Some Valuable Opinions. — The opinions of several writers of note are given in the following quotations: —
"The approach of the sexes is, in its purest condition, the result of a natural instinct, the end of which is the reproduction of the species. Still, however, we are far from saying that this ultimate result is, in any proportion of cases, the actual thought in the minds of the parties engaged."
"The very lively solicitations which spring from the
"Observation fully confirms the views of inductive philosophy; for it proves to us that coitus, exercised otherwise than under the inspirations of honest instinct, is a cause of disease in both sexes, and of danger to the social order."[31] [31] Mayer.
"It is incredible that the act of bringing men into life, that act of humanity, without contradiction of the most importance, should be the one of which there should have been the least supposed necessity for regulation, or which has been regulated the least beneficially."[32] [32] Dunoyer.
"But it may be said that the demands of nature are, in the married state, not only legal, but should be physically right. So they are, when our physical life is right; but it must not be forgotten that few live in a truly physical rectitude."[33] [33] Gardner.
"Among cattle, the sexes meet by common instinct and common will; it is reserved for the human animal to treat the female as a mere victim to his lust."[34] [34] Quarterly Review.
"He is an ill husband that uses his wife as a man treats a harlot, having no other end but pleasure: concerning which our best rule is, that although in this, as in eating and drinking, there is an appetite to be satisfied, which cannot be done without pleasing that desire; yet, since that desire and satisfaction were intended by nature for other ends, they should never be separated from those ends."
"It is a sad truth that many married persons, think-
Says another writer very emphatically, "It is a common belief that a man and woman, because they are legally united in marriage, are privileged to the unbridled exercise of amativeness. This is wrong. Nature, in the exercise of her laws, recognizes no human enactments, and is as prompt to punish any infringement of her laws in those who are legally married, as in those out of the bonds. Excessive indulgence between the married produces as great and lasting evil effects as in the single man or woman, and is nothing more nor less than legalized prostitution."
Results of Excesses. — The sad results of excessive indulgences are seen on every hand. Numerous ailments attributed to overwork, constitutional disease, or hereditary predisposition, know no other cause and need no other explanation.
Effects upon Husbands. — No doubt the principal blame in this matter properly falls upon the husband; but it cannot be said that he is the greatest sufferer; however, his punishment is severe enough to clearly indicate the enormity of the transgression, and to warn him to a reformation of his habits. The following is a quotation from an eminent medical authority: —
"But any warning against sexual dangers would be very incomplete if it did not extend to the excesses so
"Many a man has, until his marriage, lived a most continent life; so has his wife. As soon as they are wedded, intercourse is indulged in night after night, neither party having any idea that these repeated sexual acts are excesses which the system of neither can bear, and which, to the man at least, are absolute ruin. The practice is continued till health is impaired, sometimes permanently; and when a patient is at last obliged to seek medical advice, he is thunderstruck at learning that his sufferings arise from excesses unwittingly committed. Married people often appear to think that connection may be repeated as regularly and almost as often as their meals. Till they are told of the danger, the idea never enters their heads that they are guilty of great and almost criminal excess; nor is this to be wondered at, since the possibility of such a cause of disease is seldom hinted at by the medical man they consult."
"Some go so far as to believe that indulgence may increase these powers, just as gymnastic exercises aug-
"The length to which married people carry excesses is perfectly astonishing."
Consequences of Excess. — "Since my attention has been particularly called to this class of ailments, I feel confident that many of the forms of indigestion, general ill health, hypochondriasis, etc., so often met with in adults, depend upon sexual excesses. . . . That this cause of illness is not more generally acknowledged and acted on, arises from the natural delicacy which medical men must feel in putting such questions to their patients as are necessary to elicit the facts."
"It is not the body alone which suffers from excesses committed in married life. Experience every day convinces me that much of the languor of mind, confusion of ideas, and inability to control the thoughts, of which some married men complain, arise from this cause."[36] [36] Acton.
The debilitating effects of excessive sexual indulgence arise from two causes; viz., the loss of the seminal fluid, and the nervous excitement. With reference to the value of the spermatic fluid, Dr. Gardner remarks: —
"The sperm is the purest extract of the blood. . . . Nature, in creating it, has intended it not only to communicate life, but also to nourish the individual life. In
Another case came under our observation in which the patient, a man, confessed to having indulged every night for twenty years. We did not wonder that at forty he was a complete physical wreck.
Continence of Athletes. — "The moderns who are training are well aware that sexual indulgence wholly unfits them for great feats of strength, and the captain of a boat strictly forbids his crew anything of the sort just previous to a match. Some trainers have gone so far as to assure me that they can discover by a man's style of pulling whether he has committed such a breach of discipline over night, and have not scrupled to attribute the occasional loss of matches to this cause."[37] [37] Acton.
A Cause of Throat Disease. — The disease known as clergyman's sore throat is believed by many eminent physicians to have its chief origin in excessive venery. It is well known that sexual abuse is a very potent cause of throat diseases. This view is supported by the following from the pen of the learned Dr. X. Bourgeois: —
"We ought not, then, to be surprised that the physiological act, requiring so great an expenditure of vitality, must be injurious in the highest degree, when it is reiterated abusively. To engender is to give a portion of one's life. Does not he who is prodigal of himself, precipitate his own ruin? A peculiar character of the diseases which have their origin in venereal excesses and masturbation is chronicity."
"Individual predispositions, acquired or hereditary,
The author has met a large number of cases which fully verified the above statements. In fact, in quite a large proportion of cases suffering from sexual excesses which have come under his care, some form of throat ailment has been present.
A Cause of Consumption. — This fatal disease finds a large share of its victims among those addicted to sexual excesses, either of an illicit nature or within the marriage pale; for the physical effects are essentially identical. This cause is especially active and fatal with sedentary persons, but is sufficiently powerful to undermine the constitution under the most favorable circumstances, as the following case illustrates: —
The patient was a young man of twenty-two, large, muscular, and well developed, having uncommonly broad shoulders and a full chest. His occupation had been healthful, that of a laborer. He had had cough for several months, and was spitting blood. Examination of the lungs showed that they were hopelessly diseased. There was no trace of consumption in the family, and the only cause to which the disease could be attributed was excessive sexual indulgence, which he confessed to having practiced for several years.
Prostatic Troubles. — One of the most distressing symptoms of advanced age is enlargement of the prostate. Men who give themselves up to sexual excesses, find themselves at middle age or even sooner, suffering with these disorders, even in a very grave form. We have met a number of instances in which a difficulty of this kind existed, but disappeared very readily when the patient corrected his habits by adopting a continent life.
Effect on Wives. — If husbands are great sufferers, as we have seen, wives suffer still more terribly, being of feebler constitution, and hence less able to bear the frequent shock which is suffered by the nervous system. Dr. Gardner places this evil prominent among the causes "the result of which we see deplored in the public press of the day, which warns us that the American race is fast dying out, and that its place is being filled by emigrants of different lineage, religion, political ideas, and education."
The same author remarks further on the results of this with other causes which largely grow out of it: —
"It has been a matter of common observation that the physical status of the women of Christendom has been gradually deteriorating; that their mental energies were uncertain and spasmodic; that they were prematurely care-worn, wrinkled, and enervated; that they became subject to a host of diseases scarcely ever know to the professional men of past times, but now familiar to, and the common talk of, the matrons, and often, indeed, of the youngest females in the community."
So prevalent are these maladies that Michelet says with truth that the present is the "age of womb diseases."
An Illustrative Case. — Every physician of observation and experience has met many cases illustrative of the serious effects of the evil named. Many years ago, when the author was acting as assistant in a large dispensary in an Eastern city, a young woman applied for examination and treatment. She presented a great variety of nervous symptoms, prominent among which were those of mild hysteria and nervous exhaustion, together with impaired digestion and violent palpitation of the heart. In our inquiries respecting the cause of these difficulties, we learned that she had been married about six months. A little careful questioning elicited the fact that sexual indulgence was invariably practiced every night, and often two or three times, occasionally as many as four times a night.
We had the key to her troubles at once, and ordered entire continence for a month. From her subsequent reports I learned that her husband would not allow her to comply with the request, but that indulgence was much less frequent than before. The result was not all that could be desired, but there was marked improvement. If the husband had been willing to "do right," entire recovery would have taken place with rapidity.
Thousands of unfortunate wives are constantly under the doctor's care for the treatment of local ailments which have their sole origin in sexual excesses for which their husbands are responsible. It is not overstating the matter when we say that we have met hundreds of cases of this sort, and scores of times have we been requested by suffering wives to appeal to their husbands in their behalf.
Something for Husbands to Consider. — We take
"In woman, love throbs in every pulse, thrills in every nerve and fiber of her being; her life is love. She gives herself to the one she truly loves. If you find out the history of poor seduced girls, those who, as is so commonly said, loved not wisely but too well, you will find that in almost all cases they yielded to the seducer in no paroxysm of sensual passion, but because they loved and trusted with their whole heart; they fell because they sought not their own, but the gratification of another. I do not believe one bride in a hundred, of delicate, educated, sensitive women, accepts matrimony from any desire of sexual gratification; when she thinks of this at all, it is with shrinking, rather than with desire. Happy that union in which the husband understands the womanly nature.
"On the other hand, how many women are made wretched by the husband who thinks the highest end of marriage is copulation, and that his wife ought to be equally amorous with himself.
"It is a mistake to suppose that the kindness, the kiss, and the loving embrace of the wife are, in general, the expression of sexual desire. The following was the exclamation, to me, of a most refined and cultivated lady, the mother of five children, and who dearly loved her husband: `How often we wives would caress our husbands if we did not know the inevitable consequences!' I know that I am right as to the womanly nature, and I know that if men generally thus believed, there would be less licentiousness, purer and happier
In confirmation of these statements we quote the following from an author whose name frequently appears in this work, the eminent Dr. Acton: —
"I have taken pains to obtain and compare abundant evidence on this subject, and the result of my inquiries I may briefly epitomize as follows: I should say that the majority of women, happily for them, are not very much troubled with sexual feeling of any kind. What men are habitually, women are only exceptionally. I admit, of course, the existence of sexual excitement, terminating even in nymphomania, a form of insanity that those accustomed to visit lunatic asylums must be fully conversant with; but, with these sad exceptions, there can be no doubt that sexual feeling in the female is, in the majority of cases, in abeyance, and that it requires positive and considerable excitement to be roused at all; and even if roused, which in many instances it never can be, is very moderate compared with that of the male.
"Many men, and particularly young men, form their ideas of women's feelings from what they notice early in life among loose, or at least low and vulgar women. There is always a certain number of females who, though not ostensibly prostitutes, make a kind of trade of a pretty face. They are fond of admiration; they like to attract the attention of those immediately around them. Any susceptible boy is easily led to believe, whether he is not altogether overcome by the siren or not, that she, and hence all women, must have at least
"Married men, medical men, or married women themselves, would, if appealed to, tell a different tale, and vindicate female nature from the vile aspersions cast on it by the abandoned conduct and ungoverned lust of a few of its worst examples. There are many females who never feel any excitement whatever. Others, again, immediately after each period, do become, to a limited degree, capable of experiencing it; but this capacity is only temporary, and will cease entirely until the next menstrual period. The best mothers, wives, and managers of households know little or nothing of sexual indulgences. Love of home, of children, of domestic duties, are the only passions they feel. As a general rule, a modest woman seldom desires any sexual gratification for herself. She submits to her husband, but only to please him; and but for the desire of maternity, would far rather be relieved from his attention."
The Greatest Cause of Uterine Disease. — Dr. J. R. Black remarks as follows on this subject: —
"Medical writers agree that one of the most common causes of the many forms of derangement to which woman is subject consists in excessive cohabitation. The diseases known as menorrhagia, dysmenorrhœa, leucorrhœa, amenorrhœa, abortions, prolapsus, chronic
Legalized Murder. — A medical writer of considerable ability presents the following picture, the counterpart of which almost any one can recall as having occurred within the circle of his acquaintance; perhaps numerous cases will be recalled by one who has been especially observing: —
"A man of great vital force is united to a woman of evenly-balanced organization. The husband, in the exercise of what he is pleased to term his `marital rights,' places his wife, in a short time, on the nervous, delicate, sickly list. In the blindness and ignorance of his animal nature, he requires prompt obedience to his desires; and, ignorant of the law of right in this direction, thinking that it is her duty to accede to his wishes, though fulfilling them with a sore and troubled heart, she allows him passively, never lovingly, to exercise daily and weekly, month in and month out, the low and beastly of his nature, and eventually, slowly but surely, to kill her. And this man, who has as surely committed murder as has the convicted assassin, lures to his net and takes unto himself another wife, to repeat
Prof. Gerrish, in a little work from which we take the liberty to quote, speaks as follows on this subject: —
"One man, reckless of his duty to the community, marries young, with means and prospects inadequate to support the family which is so sure to come ere long. His ostensible excuse is love; his real reason, the gratification of his carnal instincts. Another man, in exactly similar circumstances, but too conscientious to assume responsibilities which he cannot carry, and in which failure must compromise the comfort and tax the purses of people from whom he has no right to extort luxuries, forbears to marry; but, feeling the passions of his sex, and being imbued with the prevalent errors on such matters, resorts for relief to unlawful coition. At the wedding of the former, pious friends assemble with their presents and congratulations, and bid the legalized prostitution God-speed. Love shields the crime, all the more easily because so many of the rejoicing guests have sinned in precisely the same way. The other man has no festival gathering. . . . Society applauds the first and frowns on the second; but, to my mind, the difference between them is not markedly in favor of the former."
"We hear a good deal said about certain crimes against nature, such as pederasty and sodomy, and they meet with the indignant condemnation of all right-minded persons. The statutes are especially severe on offenders of this class, the penalty being imprisonment between one and ten years, whereas fornication is punished by imprisonment for not more than sixty days and a fine of less than one hundred dollars. But the
Accidental Pregnancies. — "These accidental pregnancies are the great immediate cause of the enormously common crime of abortion, concerning which the morals of the people are amazingly blunted. The extent of the practice may be roughly estimated by the number of standing advertisements in the family newspapers, in which feticide is warranted safe and secret. It is not
A husband who has not sunk in his carnality too far below the brute creation will certainly pause a moment, in the face of such terrible facts, before he continues his sensual, selfish, murderous course.
Indulgence during Menstruation. — The following remarks which our own professional experience has several times confirmed, reveal a still more heinous violation of nature's laws: —
"To many it may seem that it is unnecessary to caution against contracting relationships at the period of the monthly flow, thinking that the instinctive laws of cleanliness and delicacy were sufficient to refrain the indulgence of the appetites; but they are little cognizant of the true condition of things in this world. Often have I had husbands inform me that they had not missed having sexual relations with their wives once or more times a day for several years; and scores of women with delicate frames and broken-down health have revealed to me similar facts, and I have been compelled to make personal appeals to the husbands."[38] [38] Gardner.
The following is an important testimony by an eminent physician[39] upon the same point: — [39] Dr J. R. Black.
"Females whose health is in a weak state . . . become liable, in transgressing this law, to an infectious disorder, which, it is commonly supposed, can only
It seems scarcely possible that such enormity could be committed by any human being, at least by civilized men, and in the face of the injunctions of Moses to the Jews, to say nothing of the evident indecency of the act. The Jews still maintain their integrity to the observance of this command of their ancient lawgiver.
"Reason and experience both show that sexual relations at the menstrual period are very dangerous to both man and woman, and perhaps also for the offspring, should there chance to be conception."[40] [40] Mayer.
The woman suffers from the congestion and nervous excitement which occur at the most inopportune moment possible. Man may suffer physical injury, though there are no grounds for the assertion of Pliny that the menstrual blood is so potent for evil that it will, by a mere touch, rust iron, render a tree sterile, make dogs mad, etc., or that of Paracelsus that "of it the devil makes spiders, fleas, caterpillars, and all the other insects that people the air."
Indulgence during menstruation is liable to produce violent hemorrhage, internal congestion, and even inflammation in the woman, and in the man an inflammation of the urethra, identical with gonorrhœa. One of the most inveterate cases of catarrhal inflammation of the
Effects upon Offspring. — That those guilty of the transgression should suffer, seems only just; but that an innocent being who had no part in the sin, no voice in the time or manner of its advent into the world, — that such an one should suffer equally, if not more bitterly, with the transgressors themselves, seems anything but just. But such is nature's inexorable law, that the iniquities of the parents shall be visited upon the children; and this fact should be a most powerful influence to prevent parental transgression, especially in this direction, in which the dire consequences fall so heavily and so immediately upon an innocent being.
Says Acton, "The ill effects of marital excesses are not confined to offending parties. No doubt can exist that many of the obscure cases of sickly children, born of apparently healthy parents, arise from this cause; and this is borne out by investigations among animals."
Breeders of stock who wish to secure sound progeny, will not allow the most robust stallion to associate with mares as many times during the whole season as some of these salacious human males perform a similar act within a month. One reason why the offspring suffer is that the seminal fluid deteriorates very rapidly by repeated indulgence. The spermatozoa do not have time to become mature, and progeny resulting from such immature elements will possess the same deficiency; hence the hosts of deformed, scrofulous, weazen, and idiotic children which curse the race, and testify to the sensuality of their progenitors. Another reason is the phys-
The effects of this evil may often be traced in a large family of children, nearly all of whom show traces of the excesses of their parents. It commonly happens, too, that such large families are on the hands of poor men who cannot earn enough to give them sufficient food and comfortable clothing, with nothing whatever to provide for their education. The overburdened mother has her strength totally exhausted by the excessive demands upon her system incident to child-bearing, so that she is unable to give her children that culture and training which all children need. More than likely she feels that they were forced upon her, and hence she cannot have for them all that tender sympathy and affection a mother should feel. The little ones grow up ignorant, and often vicious; for the want of home care drives them to the street. Thus does one evil create another.
It is certainly a question which deserves some attention, whether it is not a sin for parents to bring into the world more children than they can properly care for. If they can rear and educate three children properly, the same work would be only half done for six; and there are already in the world a sufficiency of half-raised people. From this class of society the ranks of thieves, drunkards, beggars, vagabonds, and prostitutes are recruited. Why should it be considered an improper or immoral thing to limit the number of children according to the circumstances of the parents? Ought it not to be considered a crime against childhood and against the race to do otherwise? It is seriously maintained by a
Indulgence during Pregnancy. — Transgressions of this sort are followed by the worst results of any form of marital excess. The mother suffers doubly, because laden with the burden of supporting two lives instead of one. But the results upon the child are especially disastrous. During the time when it is receiving its stock of vitality, while its plastic form is being molded, and its various organs acquiring that integrity of structure is which makes up what is called constitutional vigor, — during this most critical of all periods in the life of the new being, its resources are exhausted and its structure is depraved, and thus constitutional tendencies to disease are produced, by the unnatural demands made upon the mother.
Effect upon the Character. — Still another terrible consequence results from this practice so contrary to nature. The delicate brain, which is being molded with the other organs of the body, receives its cast largely from those mental and nervous sensations and actions of the mother which are the most intense. One of the most certain effects of sexual indulgence at this time is to develop abnormally the sexual instinct in the child. Here is the key to the origin of much of the sexual precocity and depravity which curse humanity. Sensuality is born in the souls of a large share of the rising generation. What wonder that prostitution flourishes in spite of Christianity and civil law?
It is scarcely necessary to say that all med-
We quote the following from a work on health by Dr. J. R. Black: —
"Coition during pregnancy is one of the ways in which the predisposition is laid for that terrible disease in children, epilepsy. The natural excitement of the nervous system in the mother by such a cause cannot operate otherwise than by inflicting injury upon the tender germ in the womb. This germ, it must be remembered, derives every quality it possesses from the parents, as well as every particle of matter of which it is composed. The old notion of anything like spontaneity in the development of the qualities of a new being, is at variance with all the latest facts and inductions concerning reproduction. And so is that of a creative fiat. The smallest organic cell, as well as the most complicated organism, in form and quality, is wholly dependent upon the laws of derivation.
"These laws are competent to explain, however subtle the ultimate process may be, the great diversities of human organization and character. Impressions from without, the emotions, conduct, and play of the organic processes within, are never alike from day to day, or from hour to hour; and it is from the aggregate of these in the parents, but especially of those in the mother immediately before and after conception, that the quality of
"In the adult, epilepsy is frequently developed by excessive venery; and the child born with such a predisposition will be exceedingly liable to the disease during its early years, when the nervous system is notoriously prone to deranged action from very slight disturbing causes.
"The infringement of this law regulating intercourse during pregnancy also reacts injuriously upon the mental capacity of the child, tending to give it a stupid, animalized look, and, there is also good reason to believe, aids in developing the idiotic condition."
Other Limitations. — Sexual indulgences ought not to occur after abortion, miscarriage, or labor at full term. Dr. Parvin reports the following case: —
"A friend in the Philadelphia legal profession has told me of his procuring a divorce within two years, for a wife, on account of her husband's cruelty, and a part of that cruelty was the driving of the nurse out of his wife's room three days after her confinement, in order that he might have intercourse with his wife."
A Selfish Objection. — The married man will raise the plea that indulgence is to him a necessity. He has only to practice the principles laid down for the maintenance of continence to entirely remove any such necessity,
But, aside from all other considerations, is it not the most supreme selfishness for a man to consider only himself in his sexual relations, making his wife wholly subservient to his own desires? As a learned professor remarks, in speaking of woman, "Who has a right to regard her as a therapeutic agent?"
Brutes and Savages more Considerate. — It is only the civilized, Christianized (?) male human being who complains of the restraint imposed upon him by the laws of nature. The untutored barbarian, even some of the lowest of those who wear the human form, together with nearly all the various classes of lower animals, abstain from sexual indulgence during pregnancy. The natives of the Gold Coast and many other African tribes regard it as a shameful offense to cohabit during gestation. In the case of lower animals, even when the male desires indulgence, the female resents any attempt of the sort by the most vigorous resistance.
Are not these wholesome lessons for that portion of the human race which professes to represent the accumulated wisdom, intelligence, and refinement of the world? Those who need reproof on this point may re-
We quote the following from the pen of a talented professor in a well-known medical college: —
"I believe we cannot too strenuously insist upon this point, — that sexual intercourse should never be undertaken with any other object than procreation, and never then unless the conditions are favorable to the production of a new being who will be likely to have cause to thankfully bless his parents for the gift of life. If this rule were generally observed, we should have no broken-nosed Tristram Shandys complaining of the carelessness of their fathers in begetting them."[41] [41] Dr. Gerrish.
What may be Done? — But what is the practical conclusion to be drawn from all the foregoing? What should people do? what may they do? Dr. Gardner offers the following remarks, which partially answer the questions: —
"We have shown that we can `DO RIGHT' without prejudice to health by the exercise of continence. Self-restraint, the ruling of the passions, is a virtue, and is within the power of all well-regulated minds. Nor is this necessarily perpetual or absolute. The passions may be restrained within proper limitations. He who indulges in lascivious thoughts may stimulate himself to frenzy; but if his mind were under proper control, he would find other employment for it, and his body, obedient to its potent sway, would not become the master of the man."
What are the "proper limitations," every person
It is but fair to say that there is a wide diversity of opinion among medical men on this subject. A very few hold that the sexual act should never be indulged except for the purpose of reproduction, and then only at periods when reproduction will be possible. Others, while equally opposed to the excesses, the effects of which have been described, limit indulgence to the number of months in the year.
Read, reflect, weigh well the matter, then fix upon a plan of action, and if it be in accordance with the dictates of better judgment, do not swerve from it.
If the suggestion made near the outset of these remarks, in comparing the reproductive function in man and animals, — that the seasons of sexual approach should be governed by the inclination of the female, — were conscientiously followed, it would undoubtedly do away with at least three-fourths of the excesses which have been under consideration. Before rejecting the hint so plainly offered by nature, let every man consider for a moment whether he has any other than purely selfish arguments to produce against it.
Early Moderation. — The time of all others when moderation is most imperatively demanded, yet least likely to be practiced, is at the beginning of matrimonial life. Many a woman dates the beginning of a life of suffering from the first night after marriage; and the mental suffering from the disgusting and even horrible recollections of that night, the events of which were scarred upon her mind as well as upon her body, have made her wretched both mentally and bodily.
A learned French writer, in referring to this subject, says, "The husband who begins with his wife by a rape, is a lost man. He will never be loved."
Cases have come under our care of young wives who have required months of careful treatment to repair the damage inflicted on their wedding night. A medical writer has reported a case in which he was called upon to testify in a suit for divorce, which is an illustration of so gross a degree of sensuality that the perpetrator certainly deserved most severe punishment. The victim, a beautiful and accomplished young lady, to please her parents, was married to a man much older than herself, riches being the chief attraction. She at once began to pine, and in a very few months was a complete wreck. Emaciated, spiritless, haggard, she was scarcely a shadow of her former self. The physician who was called in, upon making a local examination, found those delicate organs in a state of most terrible laceration and inflammation. The bladder, rectum, and other adjacent organs, were highly inflamed, and sensitive in the highest degree. Upon inquiring respecting the cause, he found that from the initial night she had been subjected to the most excessive demands by her husband, "day and
In another somewhat similar case that came to our knowledge, a young wife was delivered from the lecherous assaults of her husband — for they were no better — by the common sense of her neighbor friends, who gathered in force, and insisted upon their discontinuance. It is only now and then that cases of this sort come to the surface. The majority of them are hidden deep down in the heart of the poor, heart-broken wife, and too often they are hidden along with the victim in an early grave.
Prevention of Conception. — The evil considered in the preceding pages is by far the greatest cause of those which will be dwelt upon here. Excesses are habitually practiced through ignorance or carelessness of their direct results; and then to prevent the legitimate result of the reproductive act, innumerable devices are employed to render it fruitless. To even mention all of these would be too great a breach of propriety, even in this plain-spoken work; but accurate description is unnecessary, since those who need this warning are perfectly familiar with all the foul accessories of evil thus employed. We cannot do better than to quote from the writings of several of the most eminent authors upon this subject. The following paragraphs are from the distinguished Mayer, who has been already frequently quoted: —
"The numerous stratagems invented by debauch to
Conjugal Onanism. — "The soiling of the conjugal bed by the shameful maneuvers to which we have made allusion, is mentioned for the first time in Gen. 38:6, and following verses: `And it came to pass, when he [Onan] went in unto his brother's wife, that he spilled it on the ground, lest that he should give seed to his brother. And the thing which he did displeased the Lord; wherefore he slew him.'
"Hence the name, congugal Onanism.
"One cannot tell to what great extent this vice is practiced, except by observing its consequences, even among people who fear to commit the slightest sin, to such a degree is the public conscience perverted upon this point. Still, many husbands know that nature often succeeds in rendering nugatory the most subtle calculations, and reconquers the rights which they have striven to frustrate. No matter; they persevere, none the less, and by the force of habit they poison the most blissful moments of life, with no surety of averting the result that they fear. So, who knows if the infants, too often feeble and weazen, are not the fruit of these in themselves incomplete procreations, and disturbed by preoccupations foreign to the generic act? Is it not reasonable to suppose that the creative power, not meeting in its disturbed functions the conditions necessary for the elaboration of a normal product, the conception might be from its origin imperfect, and the being which proceeded therefrom, one of those monsters which are described in treatises on teratology?"
"Let us see, now, what are the consequences to those given to this practice of conjugal Onanism.
"We have at our disposition numerous facts which rigorously prove the disastrous influence of abnormal coitus to the woman, but we think it useless to publish them. All practitioners have more or less observed them, and it will only be necessary for them to call upon their memories to supply what our silence leaves `However, it is not difficult to conceive,' says Dr. Francis Devay, `the degree of perturbation that a like practice should exert upon the genital system of woman by provoking desires which are not gratified. A profound stimulation is felt through the entire apparatus; the uterus, Fallopian tubes, and ovaries enter into a state of orgasm, a storm which is not appeased by the natural crisis; a nervous superexcitation persists. There occurs, then, what would take place if, presenting food to a famished man, one should snatch it from his mouth after having thus violently excited his appetite. The sensibilities of the womb and the entire reproductive system are teased for no purpose. It is to this cause, too often repeated, that we should attribute the multiple neuroses, those strange affections which originate in the genital system of woman. Our conviction respecting them is based upon a great number of observations. Furthermore, the normal relations existing between the married couple undergo unfortunate changes; this affection, founded upon reciprocal esteem, is little by little effaced by the repetition of an act which pollutes the marriage bed; from thence proceed certain hard feelings, certain deep impressions which, gradually growing, eventuate in the scandalous ruptures of which the community rarely know the real motive.'
"If the good harmony of families and their reciprocal
"We may, we trust, be pardoned for remarking upon the artifices imagined to prevent fecundation, that there is in them an immense danger, of incalculable limits. We do not fear to be contradicted or taxed with exaggeration in elevating them into the proportions of a true calamity."
The following is from an eminent physician[42] who for many years devoted his whole attention to the diseases
"It is undeniable that all the methods employed to prevent pregnancy are physically injurious. Some of these have been characterized with sufficient explicitness, and the injury resulting from incomplete coitus to both parties has been made evident to all who are willing to be convinced. It should require but a moment's consideration to convince any one of the harmfulness of the common use of cold ablutions and astringent infusions and various medicated washes. Simple, and often wonderfully salutary, as is cold water to a diseased limb festering with inflammation, yet few are rash enough to cover a gouty toe, rheumatic knee, or erysipelatous head with cold water. . . . Yet, when in the general state of nervous and physical excitement attendant upon coitus, when the organs principally engaged in this act are congested and turgid with blood, do you think you can with impunity throw a flood of cold or even lukewarm water far into the vitals in a continual stream? Often, too, women add strong medicinal agents, intended to destroy by dissolution the spermatic germs, ere they have time to fulfill their natural destiny. These powerful astringents suddenly corrugate, and close the glandular structure of the parts, and this is followed, necessarily, by a corresponding reaction, and the final result is debility and exhaustion, signalized by leucorrhœa, prolapsus, and other diseases.
"Finally, of the use of intermediate tegumentary coverings, made of thin rubber or gold-beater's skin, and so often relied upon as absolute preventives, Madame de Stael is reputed to have said, `They are cobwebs for
"I will not further enlarge upon these instrumentalities. Sufficient has been said to convince any one that to trifle with the grand functions of our organism, to attempt to deceive and thwart nature in her highly ordained prerogatives, no matter how simple seem to be the means employed, is to incur a heavy responsibility and run a fearful risk. It matters little whether a railroad train is thrown from the track by a frozen drop of rain or a huge bowlder lying in the way; the result is the same, the injuries as great. Moral degradation, physical disability, premature exhaustion and decrepitude, are the result of these physical frauds, and force upon our conviction the adage, which the history of every day confirms, that `honesty is the best policy.' "
"Male Continence." — A peculiar method known as "male continence" is practiced by the members of the Oneida Community, which is thus described by Mr. Noyes, the founder of the society —
"The exact thing that our theory does propose, is to take that same power of moral restraint which Paul, Malthus, the Shakers, and all considerate men, use in one way or another to limit propagation, and instead of applying it, as they do, to the prevention of the intercourse of the sexes, introduce it at another stage of the proceedings; viz., after the sexes have come together in social effusion, and before they have reached the propagative crisis, thus allowing them all, and more than all, the ordinary freedom of love (since the crisis always interrupts the romance), and at the same time avoiding undesired procreation and all the other evils incident to male incontinence."
This abominable practice can be considered as nothing better than double masturbation. Its terrible results do not differ much from those of solitary vice. The following remarks will show what the effects of such a practice are in the male; the effects upon the female are precisely the same as those resulting from "conjugal Onanism," which have been already described: —
"The excited nervous system, if it does not receive that shock which we have seen attends ejaculation, suffers a longer and more severe strain, lasting often days and nights, and one that is repeated over again. In fact, the non-occurrence of emission after sexual excitement, permits, for a time, the repetition of the excitement; but ultimately a collapse takes place from which it is very difficult to rally a patient. . . . These practices, unnatural in the highest degree, cannot be carried on with impunity. Nature is sure, sooner or later, to inflict a severe retaliation.[43] [43] Acton.
Shaker Views. — The Shakers do not, as many suppose, believe wholly in celibacy. They believe in marriage and reproduction regulated by the natural law. They, also, would limit population, but not by interfering with nature; rather, by following nature's indications to the very letter. They believe "that no animals should use their reproductive powers and organs for any other than the simple purpose of procreation." Recognizing the fact that this is the law among lower animals, they insist upon applying it to man. Thus they find no necessity for the employment of those abominable contrivances so common among those who disregard the laws of nature. Who will not respect the purity which must characterize sexual relations so governed?
The Oneida Community. — Such a method for regulating the number of offspring is in immense contrast with that of the Oneida Community, which opens the door for the unstinted gratification of lust, separates the reproductive act entirely from its original purpose, and makes it the means of mere selfish, sensual, beastly — worse than brutish — gratification.
Those who are acquainted with the history of the founder of this community, are obliged to look upon him as a scheming sensualist; who well knows the truth, but deliberately chooses a course of evil, and beguiles into his snares others as sensual as himself. The abominations practiced among the members of the community which he has founded, are represented by those who have had an inside view of its workings as too foul to mention. It seems almost wonderful that Providence does not lay upon this gigantic brothel his hand of vengeance, as in ancient times he did upon Sodom, which could hardly
We are glad to note that popular opinion is calling loudly for the eradication of this foul ulcer. Only a short time ago a convention of more than fifty ministers met at Syracuse, N. Y., for the express purpose of considering ways and means for the removal of this blot "by legal measures or otherwise." We sincerely wish them success; and it appears to us that the people in that vicinity would be justified should they rise en masse, and purge their community of an evil so heinous, in case no civil authority can be induced to do the work of expurgation. Society must either cleanse herself of these infections plague spots, or she will soon become too rotten to hold together. We wait with much solicitude to see which event will occur.
Since the above was written, we have learned that the popular feeling against the founder of this enormous brothel rose so high that he was obliged to flee to Canada to escape paying the just penalty for his sins.
Moral Bearings of the Question. — Most of the considerations presented thus far have been of a physical character, though occasional references to the moral aspect of the question have been made. In a certain sense — and a true one — the question is wholly a moral one; for what moral right have men or women to do that which will injure the integrity of the physical organism given them, and for which they are accountable to their Creator? — Surely none; for the man who destroys
Unconsidered Murders. — But there is a more startling phase of this moral question. It is not impossible to show that actual violence is done to a human life.
It has been previously shown that in the two elements, the ovum of the female and the spermatozoon of the male, are all the elements, in rudimentary form, which go to make up the "human form divine." Alone, neither of these elements can become anything more than it already is; but the instant they come in contact, fecundation takes place, and the individual life begins. From that moment until maturity is reached, years subsequently, the whole process is only one of development. Nothing absolutely new is added at any subsequent moment. In view of these facts, it is evident that at the very instant of conception the embryonic human being possesses all the right to life it ever can possess. It is just as much an individual, a distinct human being, possessed of soul and body, as it ever is, though in a very immature form. That conception may take place during the reproductive act, cannot be denied. If, then, means are employed with a view to prevent conception immediately after the accomplishment of the act, or at any subsequent time, if successful, it would be by destroying the delicate product of the conception which
Is it immoral to take human life? Is it a sin to kill a child? Is it a crime to strangle an infant at birth? Is it a murderous act to destroy a half-formed human being in its mother's womb? Who will dare to answer no to one of these questions? Then who can refuse assent to the plain truth that it is equally a murder to deprive of life the most recent product of the generative act?
Who can number the myriads of murders that have been perpetrated at this early period of existence? Who can estimate the load of guilt that weighs upon some human souls? Who knows how many brilliant lights have been thus early extinguished? how many promising human plantlets thus ruthlessly destroyed in the very act of germinating? It is to be hoped that in the final account the extenuating influence of ignorance may weigh heavily in the scale of justice against the damning testimony of these "unconsidered murders."
The Charge Disputed. — It will be urged that these early destructions are not murders. Murder is an awful word. The act itself is a terrible crime. No wonder that its personal application should be studiously avoided; the human being who would not shrink from such a charge would be unworthy of the name of human — a very brute. Nevertheless, it is necessary to look the plain facts squarely in the face, and shrink not from the decision of an enlightened conscience. We quote the following portions of an extract which we give in full
"There is, in fact, no moment after conception when it can be said that the child has not life, and the crime of destroying human life is as heinous and as sure before the period of `quickening' has been attained, as afterward. But you still defend your horrible deed by saying: `Well, if there be, as you say, this mere animal life, equivalent at the most to simple vitality, there is no mind, no soul, destroyed, and therefore there is no crime committed.' Just so surely as one would destroy and root out of existence all the fowls in the world by destroying all the eggs in existence, so certain is it that you do by your act destroy the animal man in the egg, and the soul which animates it. . . . Murder is always sinful, and murder is the willful destruction of a human being at any period of its existence, from its earliest germinal embryo to its final, simple, animal existence in aged decrepitude and complete mental imbecility."
Difficulties. — Married people will exclaim, "What shall we do?" Delicate mothers who have already more children on their hands than they can care for, whose health is insufficient to longer endure the pains and burdens of pregnancy, but whose sensual husbands continue to demand indulgence, will echo in despairing tones, while acknowledging the truth, "What shall we do?" We will answer the question for the latter first.
Mr. Mill, the distinguished English logician, in his work on "The Subjection of Woman," thus represents the erroneous view which is popularly held of the sexual
Woman's Rights. — A woman does not, upon the performance of the marriage ceremony, surrender all her personal rights. The law recognizes this fact if her husband beats her, or in any way injures her by physical force, or even by neglect. Why may she not claim protection from other maltreatment as well? or, at least, why may she not refuse to lend herself to beastly lust? She remains the proprietor of her own body, though married; and who is so lost to all sense of justice, equity, and even morality, as to claim that she is under any moral obligation to allow her body to be abused?
"But such a course would lead to separation and divorce in numerous cases." Who will contend for the maintenance of a relation which has no other bond than lust, which views no other object than the gratification of the animal passions? Were not such a bond better broken than preserved? and were not such an object better frustrated than attained? Judge candidly.
We have carefully avoided any attempt to point out the duty of a woman under the circumstances named. That matter must be left for her to settle with her own conscience after receiving due information. Some will not hesitate to urge her to assert and maintain her rights at all hazard. Should a woman feel in conscience bound
What to Do. — Now to the question as asked by the first parties, — married people who together seek for a solution of the difficulties arising from an abandonment of all protectives against fecundation. The true remedy, and the natural one, is doubtless to be found in the suggestion made under the heads of "Continence" and "Marital Excesses." By a course of life in accordance with the principles there indicated, all these evils and a thousand more would be avoided. There would be less sensual enjoyment, but more elevated joy. There would be less animal love, but more spiritual communion; less grossness, more purity; less development of the animal, and a more fruitful soil for the culture of virtue, holiness, and all the Christian graces.
"But such a life would be impossible this side of heaven." A few who claim to have tried the experiment, think not. The Shakers claim to practice, as well as teach, such principles; and with the potent aids to continence previously specified, it might be found less difficult in realization than in thought.
A Compromise. — There will be many, the vast majority, perhaps, who will not bring their minds to accept the truth which nature seems to teach, which would confine sexual acts to reproduction wholly. Others, acknowledging the truth, declare "the spirit willing" though "the flesh is weak." Such will inquire, "Is there not some compromise by means of which we may escape the greater evils of our present mode of life?" Such may find in the following facts, suggestions for a
"Menstruation in woman indicates an aptitude for impregnation, and this condition remains for a period of six or eight days after the entire completion of the flow. During this time only can most women conceive. Allow twelve days for the onset of the menses to pass by, and the probabilities of impregnation are very slight. This act of continence is healthful moral, and irreproachable."[45] [45] Gardner.
It should be added to the above that the plan suggested is not absolutely certain to secure immunity from conception. The period of abstinence should certainly extend from the beginning of menstruation to the fourteenth day. To secure even reasonable safety, it is necessary to practice further abstinence for three or four days previous to the beginning of the flow.
Many writers make another suggestion, which would certainly be beneficial to individual health; viz., that the husband and wife should habitually occupy separate beds. Such a practice would undoubtedly serve to keep the sexual instincts in abeyance. Separate apartments, or at least the separation of the beds by a curtain, are recommended by some estimable physicians, who suggest that such a plan would enable both parties to conduct their morning ablutions with proper thoroughness, and without sacrificing that natural modesty which operates so powerfully as a check upon the excessive indulgence of the passions. Many will think the suggestion a good one, and will make a practical appli-
This subject cannot be concluded better than by the following quotations from an excellent and able work, entitled, "The Ten Laws of Health"[46]: — [46] Black.
"The obvious design of the sexual desire is the reproduction of the species. . . . The gratification of this passion, or indeed of any other, beyond its legitimate end, is an undoubted violation of natural law, as may be determined by the light of nature, and by the resulting moral and physical evils."
"Those creatures not gifted with erring reason but with unerring instinct, and that have not the liberty of choice between good and evil, cohabit only at stated periods, when pleasure and reproduction are alike possible. It is so ordered among them that the means and the end are never separated; and as it was the All-wise Being who endowed them with this instinct, without the responsibility resulting from the power to act otherwise, it follows that it is HIS LAW, and must, therefore, be the true copy for all beings to follow having the same functions to perform, and for the same end. The mere fact that men and women have the power and liberty of conforming or not conforming to this copy, does not set them free from obedience to a right course, nor from the consequences of disobedience."
"The end of sexual pleasure being to reproduce the species, it follows, from the considerations just advanced, that when the sexual function is diverted from its end (reproduction), or if the means be used when the end is impossible, harm or injury should ensue."
"Perhaps the number is not small of those who think there is nothing wrong in an unlimited indulgence of the sexual propensity during married life. The marriage vow seems to be taken as equivalent to the freest license, about which there need be no restraint. Yet, if there be any truth in the law in reference to the enjoyment of the means only when the end is possible, the necessity of the limitation of this indulgence during married life is clearly as great as for that of any other sensual pleasure.
"A great majority of those constituting the most highly civilized communities, act upon the belief that anything not forbidden by sacred or civil law is neither sinful nor wrong. They have not found cohabitation during pregnancy forbidden; nor have they ever had their attention drawn to the injury to health and organic development which such a practice inflicts. Hence, an habitual yielding to inclination in this matter has determined their life-long behavior.
"The infringement of this law in the married state does not produce in the husband any very serious disorder. Debility, aches, cramps, and a tendency to epileptic seizures are sometimes seen as the effects of great excess. An evil of no small account is the steady growth of the sexual passion by habitual unrestraint. It is in this way that what is known as libidinous blood is nursed as well among those who are strictly virtuous, in the ordinary meaning of the term, as among those who are promiscuous in their intercourse.
"The wife and the offspring are the chief sufferers by the violation of this law among the married. Why this is so, may in part be accounted for by the following
"Human beings having no instinctive prompting as to what is right and what is wrong, cohabitation, like many other points of the behavior, is left for reason or the will to determine; or, rather, as things now are, to unreason; for reason is neither consulted nor enlightened as to what is proper and allowable in the matter. Nature's rule, by instinct, makes it devolve upon the female to determine when the approaches of the male are allowable.
"But some may say that she is helpless in the matter. No one dare to approach her without consent before marriage; and why should man not be educated up to the point of doing the same after marriage? She is neither his slave nor his property; nor does the tie of marriage bind her to carry out any unnatural requirement."
| A Chapter for Married People. Plain facts for old and young : embracing the natural history and hygiene of organic life. | |