University of Virginia Library

Scene Third.

—A Glimpse of Happy Land, from the Palace of Sans-Souci.
Enter Couleur de Rose and Prospero.
Pros.
The Prince recovered!

C. de Rose.
Quite as well as you, Or I.

Pros.
Ecstatic tidings, if they're true.

C. de Rose.
Of that there cannot be the slightest doubt,
Here's the official bulletin just out;
(reading)
“Prince Felix woke after a good night's rest,
Rang for hot water, rose, and shaved, and drest;
And to his page with feeling said, ‘Your hand, boy,
I am all right and jolly as a sand boy.’
No further bulletin will issued be,—
Signed, Esculapius Homeopath, M. D.”

Pros.
What can have worked so wonderful a cure?

C. de Rose.
Not the physician, that you may be sure.
A message came last night by telegraph,
Which made him better, by a better half;
And thus the only and uncommon sadness
In Happy Land is changed to common gladness.

Pros.
Common, indeed. We're all, 'tis but too true,
So happy that we don't know what to do!
Some crisis must be near.

(trumpet without)
C. de Rose.
The Prince behold,
Looking once more fresh as a four-year-old.

Enter Prince Felix, followed by four Pages.
Pros.
Long live Prince Felix!

C. de Rose.
Best of princes living!

Prince.
Friends, give me joy.

C. de Rose.
'Tis hardly worth the giving;
Every one has it, sir, in your dominions,
Where all your subjects hold the same opinions;
A land of corn and wine, oil, milk and honey,
Where all is done for love and naught for money.
We hardly know whether your restoration,
Is to yourself cause of congratulation;
For surfeited with bliss, the taste of grief
We fancied must be almost a relief.

Prince.
You're right; at first I quite enjoyed each throe,
And revelled in the luxury of woe!
But after all, I can't say it's unpleasant,
To feel as jolly as I do at present;
With the sweet prospect of a lovely wife
To share my careless throne and cloudless life,
Amidst a happy people who adore me,
And ministers who never cross or bore me.

C. de Rose.
Sir, we regret to draw your grave attention
To the effect of what you're pleased to mention.
The people are with joy almost delirious,
Their gaiety is really getting serious;
And it becomes our duty to point out
The evil lurking so much good about.
The Treasury is over stock'd with treasure,
The Bank is crammed with bullion beyond measure;
Funds have gone up so desperately high,
None can sell out, because none in can buy!
Shares of all sorts are paying Cents per cent.,
There's scarce a landlord will receive his rent;
Our tradesmen smiling give their goods away,
And think no sacrifice too great to-day.
Our manufacturers are in such feather!
They talk of leaving business altogether!
Fortunes are made too rapidly by farming!
We are so prosperous, it's quite alarming!

Pros.
And while at home, our bliss is so abounding,
Foreign affairs are equally astounding!
Throughout the Fairy World, from ev'ry power,
Friendly assurances arrive each hour.
Our navy but for pleasure rides the seas,
Our standing army only stands at ease!
And I can't help the same opinion nourishing,
We shall be ruined if we keep so flourishing!

Prince.
I feel the truth of what you've represented,
If folks can't grumble, they'll get discontented;
Can any patriot devise some measure
To check this perfect plethora of pleasure?

C. de Rose.
One talked of calling, sir, a public meeting,
And earnestly the Government entreating,
To put some sort of burthen on their backs,
If it were nothing but—an Income Tax.
And as beneath no debt our own state labours,
We might propose to pay off all our neighbour's.

Prince.
(Exeunt Couleur de Rose and Prospero)
Air—Prince—“Happy Land.”

(Exit Prince, followed by Pages)