University of Virginia Library

Scene Fourth.

—Chamber in the Tower—Window in centre doors right and left—A curtain covering a recess on one side.
Enter Queen with a paper.
Queen.
“Elopement in High Life.” Yes, here's the article,
Of which I have concocted every particle,
And had inserted in a late edition,
Of our “Court Journal.” This without suspicion.
Florina will be sure to read—and then
Burst out into abuse of all young men,
Particularly Charming—tear her hair—
Sing “Crazy Jane”—and rising in despair,
Send for some poison to the 'potecary,
Or fling herself headlong into the area!
She comes! I'll place the paper where she'll find it,
And listen. Ah, this curtain—I'll behind it.

(places paper on table, and hides behind the curtain)
Enter Florina.
Flor.
My bosom's lord sits lightly on its throne—
King Charming soon will claim me for his own!
And in Fan-sea we shall enjoy, no doubt,
A life of linkèd sweetness, long drawn out!
I wonder, though, I hear no news from Court.
Ah, here's the Journal, which may some report.
“Latest Intelligence, Express Edition,
Elopement in High Life.” What meets my vision?
“Last night, between the hours of seven and eight,
Princess Troutina, near the garden gate,
Was with King Charming in a carriage seen,
Starting upon the road to Gretna Green;
The pace they drove at, all pursuit defied,—
And we've just heard the nuptial knot is tied.”
The nuptial knot! Oh, no! it cannot be!
Marry Troutina—and engaged to me!
Impossible! and yet the heading read—
“From our own Correspondent.” Then, indeed,
It must be true! To doubt it none would dare!
Time has no chloroform for my despair;
I will not live to be of Cupid thought a butt,
But fling myself at once into the water-butt!

Queen.
(aside)
I'll haste and see there's enough water in it—
I would not have thee linger half a minute.

(Exit)
Air—Florina—“The Cavalier.”

The Blue Bird appears at the window.
Bird.
Florina!

(this is spoken by Charming)
Flor.
Ah! who breathes that wretched name?
Methought the sound in at the window came!

Bird.
Florina!

Flor.
There, again my name I heard!
Who calls?

Bird.
'Tis I!

Flor.
A beautiful blue bird!

Bird.
I would I were thy bird!

Flor.
Sweet, so would I!
But it's no use, because I'm going to die.

Bird.
To die! you wouldn't think of such a thing!

Flor.
Oh, wouldn't you, if you'd lost such a king
As I have?

Bird.
Nay, take comfort, gentle maid!
Your King's not lost—he only is mislaid;
And if he hears himself thus sweetly cried,
It won't be long before he's at your side.

Flor.
Oh, comfortable bird, can this be so?

Bird.
Does not my voice, then, fair Florina know?

Flor.
Your voice!—good gracious! no, it never can!—

Bird.
Yes, I'm that poor, unhappy little man!
Condemned for seven long years, and in all weathers,
To hop about in this blue suit of feathers.

Flor.
By whom and why this metamorphose strange?

Bird.
A fairy changed me, 'cause I wouldn't change.

Flor.
But did you not elope, then, with Troutina?

Bird.
I took her, by mistake, for you, Florina!
And never from my love's own colours flew—
As man or bird, you'll find me still “true blue.”

Duet—“Over the hills and far away”—“Beggar's Opera.”
Charm.
Were I perched on Greenland's coast,
And blue with cold my talons' tips,
Warm my heart would be as toast,
If chirrup'd to by those sweet lips.

Flor.
Should some Indian juggler turn
Me into a bird as well;
Not the least 'twould me concern.
If with my Charming I might dwell.

Charm.
And I your nest would feather, too,

Flor.
Every day we'd bill and coo!

Charm.
And I would fondly fly with you,
Over the hills till all was blue!

Flor.
Sweet bird, to thee I pledge my virgin troth.

Bird.
May I be made into blue chicken broth,
If ever I on other hand alight!

Flor.
But we must keep a look out very bright!
For should the Queen find out that such the trick is,
She'll wring your neck like any common dicky's!

Bird.
In the dark cypress grove, across the green,
Lodgings to let for single birds I've seen;
I'll take apartments, furnished, in some tree,
From whence this dear old window I can see;
And when the coast is clear of the community,
I'll hop to you at every hop-portunity.

Flor.
And what shall be the signal?

Bird.
Just one verse
Of this old song—I learned it from my nurse.

Air—Charming—“Lady bird, lady bird, fly away home.”
Pretty bird, pretty bird, blue as the sky,
The sun has gone down in the west.
Then hither to solace your lady-love fly,
And sing her the song she loves best.
Pretty bird, pretty bird, blue as the sky,
Here to thy lady-love, pretty bird, fly.

Flor.
Hark! some one comes! away—away, my poppet!

Bird.
Fear nothing! long ere they can twig, I'll hop it!

Enter Queen—Blue Bird disappears.
Queen.
(aside)
I haven't heard a tumble, or a squall,
I hope her heart's not failed her, after all.

Flor.
Who's there?

Queen.
The Queen!

Flor.
My royal step-mamma.
Madam, your most obedient!

Queen.
(aside)
Smiling—ah!
What may this mean? has Fate cut some new caper
To foil my vengeance? (aloud)
I sent you the paper.

Flor.
Your Majesty's too kind!

Queen.
Important news!

Flor.
Important, ma'am, if true—the doubt excuse.

Queen.
Talk'st thou to me of “ifs?” with proof in print!

Flor.
A printer's proof, that may have errors in't!
When 'tis revised, I'll read it, ma'am, again!

Queen.
The tidings surely must have turned her brain,
Or else this impudence too far is carried.
Dare you deny my daughter's gone and married?

Flor.
Gone, she may be—but married, I think not,

Queen.
Wretch! on her honour wouldst thou cast a blot?

Flor.
No—on my honour, but I've heard—

Queen.
You've heard
What? who could tell you?

Flor.
Oh, a little bird,
As people say!

Queen.
(aside)
So cool and so contented!
She something knows beyond what I've invented.
(aloud)
What have you heard? Speak, ere my patience fails.

Flor.
I won't tell stories, and I don't tell tales;
I should regret your Majesty to grieve,
Therefore respectfully I take my leave.

(curtseys to Queen, and exit)
Queen.
'Tis well! but for this conduct she shall smart!
I'll break her spirit, or I'll break her heart!
Oh, were she not the pet of all the people,
I'd have her hanged as high as the church steeple,
Or smothered, as King Richard did the babbies—
But heir presumptive to the throne the drab is!
And for high treason I should be attainted!
Is she with some disastrous fact acquainted?
Or does she only hope? I must make certain,
So by your leave again, convenient curtain!

(conceals herself behind curtain)
Florina peeps in, and then re-enters.
Flor.
(sings)

Queen.
(aside)
What's that about some bird the creature sings?

Flor.
I hear the flutter of his pretty wings,
He comes!

Blue Bird appears at window, with a pair of diamond bracelets in his beak.
Bird.
My love!

Flor.
My life—my dicky darling!

Queen.
(aside)
A talking bird! a parrot or a starling?
No, 'tis a bird of Paradise I view,
That somebody has shot with powder blue.

Flor.
Where hast thou been?

Bird.
Home to my palace, where
I picked out for my love this matchless pair
Of bracelets—wear them for my sake!

Flor.
I will!

Bird.
They're a free gift, though brought in with a bill.

Queen.
(aside)
That bird's a thief! Who'd make so bad a pun
Would pick a pocket, and that's what he's done;
He never came by those fine bracelets fairly.
Oh, won't I have his toby tickled rarely!

Flor.
And have you settled where you mean to stop?

Bird.
Yes, I have got a snug room at the top
Of an old cypress tree—it's rather high,
A sort of first-floor parlour next the sky;
Up twenty pair of boughs—but very airy.
The last who lived there was a wild canary!
And from it I've the finest bird's-eye view
Imaginable—for it is of you.

Flor.
Oh, I'm afraid my pretty dicky flatters!

Queen.
(aside)
Faster than forty magpies the fool chatters!
From this tell-tale tom-tit she's gained her knowledge!
I'll have him plucked worse than a goose at college,
And roasted all alive for my own eating.

(Exit)
Bird.
And now to roost I find I must be fleeting.

Flor.
Wilt thou begone! It is not yet near day.

Bird.
I'm very sorry, but I cannot stay.
Such late hours do not suit my sort of fowl,
I would, for thy sake, I had been an owl!
But in five minutes, I'll lay you an egg,
I shall be fast asleep upon one leg!

Flor.
Well, then, farewell, love, since it so must be;
To-morrow, early, I will call for thee!
Good-night, good-night—a thousand times good-night

Bird.
A thousand times the worse, to want thy light.

(flies off)
Flor.
Air—Florina—“My own Blue Bell.”