 | The Island of Jewels |  |
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Scene Third.
—Rocky Pass, and Foot of the Steel Mountain—Storm raging.Enter Prince Prettiphello and Bellotta.
Prince.
O Fortune! well may mortals call you fickle!
Your Prettiphello's in a pretty pickle.
Bel.
Papa and ma are in the same sweet mess.
Prince.
The same ejectment, and the same distress,
Have thrown us on this parish, quite unknown,
Too poor to have a Union of its own.
Bel.
It serves us right, my sister would declare,
For having broken up her union there.
Not that we even overcharged the picture,
The green boar turned out a green boa constrictor;
I'd rather, were I forced a choice to make,
Pig with a pig, than go snacks with a snake!
Prince.
As to the King, who thought such wealth to sack,
The blow has given his cranium quite a crack;
His talk is all of money, but so queer,
I really think he must have seen King Lear.
Enter King, Queen, and Count.
King.
Blow winds and crack your cheeks, the clouds go spout!
To raise the wind, and get a good blow out.
Rain cats and dogs, or pitchforks perpendicular,
The sky's not mine, and needn't be particular.
I tax not you, ye elements, you pay
No duty under schedules D or A,
You owe me no subscription. Funds may fall,
It makes no difference to you at all.
Bel.
Gracious, papa! don't stand here, if you please.
Queen.
“Things that love night, love not such nights as these.”
Persuade him to move on, Prince Prettiphello.
Prince.
Are you aware, sir, you have no umbrella?
(rain)
King.
A thought has struck me, rather entertaining,
I am a King more rained upon than reigning.
My wits are going fast!
Queen.
I fear 'tis so.
Prince.
Take comfort, ma'am, there are so few to go.
Would that our loss was nothing more, alas!
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What, have his daughters brought him to this pass?
Count.
He has no daughters, sir.
King.
'Sdeath! don't tell fibs!
He must have one who won't down with the dibs,
Although she's made of money! Nothing I know
Bothers your gig so much as want of rhino.
Prince.
His head's quite turned with losing all that pelf.
King.
For coining they can't touch the King himself.
Queen.
Here's a dry cavern, if he would but cross over.
King.
I'd talk a word or two with this philosopher!
What is the price of stocks?
Prince.
Mine are but low.
Suppose you just walk in, some here may know.
King.
A famous dodge! For ninety millions draw
A bill at sight upon my son-in-law,
And then—bolt—bolt—bolt—bolt.
(Exeunt King into cavern, followed by Queen, &c.)
Enter Fidelia.
Fid.
After my mistress all night I've been jogging,
Though it's a night you'd not turn out a dog in;
And I begin to fear I've missed my way,
Though where I want to go to I can't say—
But I suppose my lady is somewhere,
And I am quite determined to go there.
Air—“Trab, Trab.”
Though it's a night you'd not turn out a dog in;
And I begin to fear I've missed my way,
Though where I want to go to I can't say—
But I suppose my lady is somewhere,
And I am quite determined to go there.
To find my mistress dear, I
Put forward my best foot,
Till both have grown so weary
I've no best first to put!
But whether best or not,
While any foot I've got
I'll tramp, tramp, tramp, like Jetty Treffz,
And trot, trot, trot, trot!
Put forward my best foot,
Till both have grown so weary
I've no best first to put!
But whether best or not,
While any foot I've got
I'll tramp, tramp, tramp, like Jetty Treffz,
And trot, trot, trot, trot!
Of legs I've not the worst pair,
Perhaps that e'er were seen,
Besides they are the first pair
On which, as yet, I've been.
But give in I would not,
Though on my last I'd got.
I'd tramp, tramp, tramp, &c.
Perhaps that e'er were seen,
Besides they are the first pair
On which, as yet, I've been.
But give in I would not,
Though on my last I'd got.
I'd tramp, tramp, tramp, &c.
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Here's some one coming, who perchance may guide me.
I thought no mortal could be out beside me.
I thought no mortal could be out beside me.
Enter Laidronetta.
Lai.
Well, I can't say I'd take this walk by choice!
Fid.
Out and alas, it is my lady's voice!
Lai.
Fidelia?
Fid.
Oh! what words my joy can measure
Lai.
This is, indeed, an unexpected pleasure!
Fid.
But what's this stone about your neck I see?
Lai.
About a hundred weight, it seems to me.
Fid.
And on your feet, what horrid clogs to use!
Lai.
You wouldn't much like standing in my shoes.
Fid.
Off with both shoes and stone.
Lai.
I can't, they're spell bound,
And so am I, to seek a magic well, bound,
Upon the summit of a steep Steel Hill,
And with its water this old pitcher fill.
Fid.
This pitcher! Why 'tis cracked, and so must he
Who sent you on this crazy errand be.
Lai.
Not he—the person's feminine in gender,
For the vindictive Magotine's the sender!
The Serpent's tale was true; I now my folly see,
And feel that honesty's the safest policy.
Fid.
I was your counsel,—I will share your sentence.
Enter Fairy Benevolentia, with the net.
Ben.
Nay, for too late can never come repentance,
When 'tis sincere.
Fid.
A fairy, for a shilling!
Ben.
To hold the Serpent harmless are you willing?
Lai.
Too happy!
(the moon appears, and by her light the Steel Mountain seen at the back of the stage)
Ben.
Then behold the steep Steel Hill,
Up which no human Jack or mortal Jill
Ever yet went to fetch a pail of water
But Jack fell down, and Jill came tumbling a'ter.
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To what length snakes, who are in love, can go.
(waves her wand—the Serpent appears)
Stand and unfold thyself, and never stop,
Till made a winding staircase to the top.
(the Serpent glides up the centre of the mountain, forming a succession of coils like steps to the summit)
Fid.
Is there alive a more obliging adder,
To make his scaly back a scaling ladder.
Lai.
For the Sea Serpent he might well be shown!
Fid.
The greatest stretch of kindness ever known.
Lai.
To such extent when friendship is displayed,
Lawyers would call it “an extent in aid!”
Ben.
Now boldly up, and in the well dip thrice
The broken jug—but take a friend's advice;
Don't drink or touch a drop of water till
You've got in safety once more down the hill.
(music—Laidronetta ascends the coils of the Serpent, and disappears at the top of the mountain)
Air.—Fidelia—“Such a getting up stairs.”
Such a getting up stairs, and a playing on the serpent,
Such a getting up stairs I never did see!
The course is clear, the ruck must yield,
She backs her favourite 'gainst the field.
She'll win the cup, full to the brim!
I must own—“all along of him!”
Such a getting upstairs, &c.
(Laidronetta descends, divested of the mill-stone and iron shoes, and bearing a golden vase in her hand, full of water)
Lai.
(to Snake)
A thousand thanks; I hope I didn't hurt you.
Oh! madam, (to Fairy)
of this spring behold the virtue—
The first dip that I took into the well,
Down with a splash the heavy mill-stone fell;
The second dip, off went my iron shoes!
And, at the third, the broken earthen cruse
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And down I've brought it, full as it will hold!
Ben.
The water in it has a wond'rous charm,
And as you use it works for good or harm.
Apply it outwardly, and all will see
That you're as handsome as you need to be;
But taken inwardly, with all your heart,
'Twill to yon Serpent happiness impart.
Choose—you can do whichever you like best,
Seem yourself beautiful, or make him blest.
Fid.
Upon my word a puzzling situation!
Lai.
No, I decide, ma'am, without hesitation,
(to Snake)
Since I can serve you, here's my service to you;
Your health, poor Snake, and much good may it do you.
(drinks)
Ben.
Well done! such actions beautiful must make you
In all men's eyes, and none will hence mistake you.
The Serpent disappears—The scene changes to a magnificent Fairy Garden, and King Emerald appears, surrounded by his Court.
Behold your spouse; love him perhaps you can.
Fid.
Oh, Gemini! a jewel of a man!
Enter Fairy Magotine, with her Elves.
Mag.
My patience is exhausted! Where's this jade?
How now? What's here to do? False stars! betrayed!
The charm dissolved! the Serpent cast his skin!
Fid.
He has jumped out, and you may now jump in.
Ben.
Malicious hag, who snares for others set.
Be as you should be, caught in your own net!
(puts the net over Magotine)
And by your own bad spirits live tormented!
(Magotine and her Elves sink)
(to Laidronetta)
By Hymen now your bliss shall be cemented.
Share with King Emerald his island throne,
A richer jewel it could never own.
Your selfish kin for your sake, I forgive.
Approach!
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And mark this maxim while you live—
If mortals would be happy here below,
The surest way is making others so!
Finale—“Crown Diamonds.”
Lai.
As jewels once they'd hearts of stone,
But now restored to flesh and bone—
They tremble lest from wrath or whim,
Your breath should all their lustre dim.
But now restored to flesh and bone—
They tremble lest from wrath or whim,
Your breath should all their lustre dim.
Ben.
We tried to make them precious fine,
Don't from them all take out the shine,
Our poor stage diamonds don't disdain,
And if you cut them, come again!
Don't from them all take out the shine,
Our poor stage diamonds don't disdain,
And if you cut them, come again!
Fid.
Paste though they may appear,
To some great Pit-diamond here—
Let them your pretty dear
Children entertain!
To some great Pit-diamond here—
Let them your pretty dear
Children entertain!
Lai.
The purest gem may have a flaw;
Perfection none yet ever saw,
Though all that glitters isn't gold,
To pass for such the mass is bold.
Perfection none yet ever saw,
Though all that glitters isn't gold,
To pass for such the mass is bold.
Fid.
Then let the candour gain applause,
Of Jewels who confess their flaws,
I own my guilt, nay, more, admit
I mean your gold to pay for it.
Of Jewels who confess their flaws,
I own my guilt, nay, more, admit
I mean your gold to pay for it.
All.
Paste though they may appear, &c.
Brilliant Discovery of the Crown Jewels in the Palm of Success—Tableau.
| The Island of Jewels | |