University of Virginia Library

Scene Second.

—A Meadow, with a stream flowing through it, over which hangs a tree.
Enter Graceful.
Grace.
Provoking! Scarcely out of sight of town,
My Patent Safety cab has broken down;
D'ye call that Hansom? I don't, I must say.
There's nothing for it but walk all the way!
There's a short cut across these fields, I'm told,
And so at once to take it I'll make bold.
But stay—to grace my opening speech when there,
A brilliant thought has struck me, I declare!
I'll sit me down beside this running brook,
And note it in my Punch's pocket-book.
(sits down on a bank; takes out pocket-book and writes)
A large Carp leaps out of the stream and falls on the grass.
Bless me, what's that? A carp, as I'm alive!
And what a fine one—big as any five!
It can't jump back again—what will it do?
I never saw a carp in such a stew!
Poor thing! if left there soon 'twill gasp its last;
Thrown out, like me, it needs a friendly cast
Upon its journey. Come, my friend, I'm sure
You won't object to the cold water cure.
So here you go—one, two, three, and away.

Throws the Fish into the water—it sinks, but rises instantly, and says—
Carp.
Thank ye! I'll do as much for you some day.

(disappears)
Grace.
It spoke! A talking fish! To such a wonder
The singing mouse must instantly knock under.
A fish that can talk sense—not like the silly
Seal that but said “Pa-pa,” in Piccadilly.
And so politely, too! At any rate,
That fish has never been to Billingsgate.
(a Crow heard without)
Heyday! an eagle chasing a poor crow;
The great oppress the little—where's my bow?
Music—fits an arrow to his bow—the Crow flies across, pursued by an Eagle—he aims and fires at the Eagle—it falls dead.
There, my poor bird, from danger you are freed.

Crow.
I'm berry much obliged to you, indeed.

Grace.
Mercy upon us! here's a talking bird!

Crow.
Ees, Graceful.

Grace.
Graceful! then my name you've heard.

Crow.
Who hasn't heard your name him like to know.

Grace.
What a particularly civil crow.

Crow.
And you know mine.

Grace.
Indeed! what is it?

Crow.
Jim.

Grace.
Jim Crow! Oh, yes, I've often heard of him.

Song—Crow.
(Exit)

Grace.
My act was scarcely worth so much applause;
It was the cause, my soul—it was the cause!
When great strong birds would pluck the weak and small,
They feather the just dart that bids them fall.
So “on we goes again.”
(going)
(the whoop of an Owl is heard without)
What means that cry?
Some other helpless bird in jeopardy!
Aye! (goes to wing, and drags forward part of a net)

Here's a net, spread to catch heedless fowl,
And in its meshes a poor purblind owl.

Owl appears in net, at wing.
Owl.
Och hone! och hone! and sure you may say that,
For I'm as blind by day as any bat.

Grace.
An Irish owl! no wonder at the noise!
And one, too, who the power of speech enjoys!
But after all that I've heard talk and sing,
A chattering owl is no such wondrous thing.

Owl.
Och winisthru! what shall I do—o—o—o?

Grace.
Why, don't make such a horrid hubbaboo,
And I will cut the net and let you fly.
(cuts net)
There, now—come out of that entirely.

Owl.
(coming out)
St. Patrick's blessing on you for that same,
Good Master Graceful.

Grace.
You, too, know my name!

Owl.
Och, sure, I'd know your voice, sir, any day;
Haven't I often heard it at the play?

Grace.
You, at the play! Why, what could you there call?

Owl.
Der Freyschutz. I'm the ould original.

Duet—Graceful and Owl—“Der Freyschutz.”
Grace.
How! indeed, are you then he,
Whose great eyes I used to see?
Sir, I beg your pardon,
All my wonder now is o'er;
Oft, of course, we've met before,
When at Covent Garden.
But where have you been, you rogue?
For now you have got a brogue;
Or my senses err, man,

Owl.
Faith and truth, I can't well say,
But think I caught it, sir, one day,
From my cousin German.

But, sir, without any more botheration,
You've laid me under a great obligation;
And if, sir, to return it I don't haste,
I'll give you leave to say, “that bird's a beast.”

Incantation—“Der Freyschutz.”
Grace.
On your aid I may rely?

Owl.
U—hu—i! U—hu—i!

Grace.
How pathetic that reply!

Owl.
U—hu—i! U—hu—i!

Grace.
Me, he says, he will protect.

Owl.
U—hu—i! U—hu—i!

Grace.
Or words, at least, to that effect.

Owl.
U—hu—i! U—hu—i!

Grace.
Would that many songs we hear
Had a meaning half as clear.

Owl.
U—hu—i! U—hu—i!

(Exit)
Grace.
Air—“I dreamed that I dwelt in marble halls.”

(Exit)