University of Virginia Library

Scene Fifth.

—The Beach of the Island at low water, and by moonlight, seen through a perforated rock.
Music—“Pretty Star of the Night”—Venus, as the Evening Star, rises in the horizon.
Ven.
As I suspected, Mentor love defies,
How very lucky 'twas my time to rise.
Where is my hopeful son? Cupid, my dear,
I want you, come directly.

Enter Cupid.
Cupid.
Ma, I'm here.

Ven.
You are! and don't you know what mischief's brewing?

Cupid.
I think I ought, for it was all my doing.

Ven.
What, to let that vile Mentor build a ship,
And with Telemachus give us the slip?
My stars and garters!

Cupid.
Oh, mamma, for shame!

Ven.
Well, I can't help it, then; be made the game
Of all the sky by these two clods of clay,
I won't endure it. Find me out some way
To turn the tide—some night's move that may check 'em.

Cupid.
Do as before—ask Neptune just to wreck 'em.

Ven.
He can't. He told me but this afternoon,
He cannot raise the wind again so soon.
The last time he was forced to give a rout,
He put his trident up the water-spout.

Cupid.
Well, 'pon my honour, that was forking out.
What can be done, dear mother, for you know
Calypso's sworn by Styx that they shall go.

Ven.
O, burn the Styx.

Cupid.
Stay, you have struck a light
Into my brain-pan, and a prospect bright
Is kindling. “Burn the Styx,”—theirs shall be burned
Before they cut them, don't you be concerned.
Dry your bright eyes, for ere they have done winking,
Through this night's watch they'll see yon vessel sinking.

Ven.
A mother's blessing be upon thy brow!

Cupid.
I'm much obliged; but don't stand preaching now—
Here comes the lady I must work on. Fly
Up to your own blue lamp-post in the sky.

(Venus rises—Cupid retires)
Enter Calypso.
Cal.
Too hasty Queen, what has thy passion done—
The ship is built, and they may cut and run.

Cupid.
(advancing)
Not if you'll trust to me!

Cal.
How so, my dear?
I've sworn by Styx and cannot interfere.

Cupid.
But Eucharis—

Cal.
Name not that hated name!

Cupid.
Hated or not you're partners in this game—
If Mentor wins, the stake is lost to both.
Now though your Majesty has ta'en an oath,
It don't bind Eucharis, and I'll inspire
Her and the rest to set the ship on fire;
In that ship's smoke old Mentor's hopes you'll smother—
You haven't sworn that he shall build another.

Cal.
Air—Calypso—“Der Freischutz.”

(Exeunt Cupid and Calypso)
Enter Mentor.
Ment.
So that job's jobbed.
Enter Telemachus.
Now, Master T., away!

Tel.
Whither?

Ment.
No, not with her, with me; “delay
Is dangerous.” To mizzle I decide.
I've built a ship—she'll float with the next tide.
And see, 'tis rising fast.

Tel.
A clap of thunder
This to my hopes. Where's Eucharis, I wonder?
Mayn't I take leave of her? Let me go back,
Indeed I must. I've got my things to pack.

Ment.
Pack nothing—but pack off without delay.

Tel.
But Eucharis! Ah! see, she comes this way,
With all the Nymphs, who lighted torches bear.

Ment.
Aye, led by Love, Hatred, Revenge, Despair,
And Jealousy, that green eyed monster, who
Eats nothing which his own cook doesn't stew.
Stand by and let them go on with their burning.
It's a long lane that never has a turning.

Enter Eucharis, Leucothoe, and other Nymphs, with lighted torches, led by Cupid, Jealousy, Revenge, Hatred, Despair, and the Furies.
Chorus
—“Siege of Corinth.”

(Exeunt all but Mentor and Telemachus)
Ment.
Love, still I laugh at thee! oh, shallow dreamer,
The vessel I have chartered is a steamer—
She's got her coals aboard, and he can't spoil her,
The fire he lights will only heat the boiler,
And ere “Jack Robinson” the rogue can say
She'll get her steam up and be under weigh.
Here she comes smoking like a modern dandy.
Away! this is no moment words to bandy;
Up, up with me, I say! From yonder rocks
We'll jump at once upon the paddle box.

(forces Telemachus up the rocks—the steamer glides on as they ascend)
Tel.
Ah, Eucharis! one last—one little peep;
How oft you've said, sir, “Look before you leap.”

Ment.
True! but at present that won't suit my book—
In this case you must “leap before you look.”

(pushes him off the rock on to the paddle box and jumps after him—the vessel sails off)
Re-enter Cupid, Eucharis, Leucothoe, Nymphs, Furies, &c., Calypso.
Cal.
Baffled! defied! It's all along of you;
Vile Love! since he is gone, be you gone too!

Cupid.
I'm sure to stay here I've no inclination,
But you detain me by some fascination.

Cal.
I'm sick of all the flummery you utter!

Ment.
(from the vessel, which has re-appeared at sea)
You're right, “Fine words no parsnips ever butter.

Cal.
Who art thou that can thus e'en Love disarm?

Ment.
Wisdom! whose Ægis shelters youth from harm;
Behold me in my proper form appear.

(assumes the form of Minerva—the name of “Mentor” on the paddle-box changing at the same time to that of “Minerva”)
All.
Minerva!

Cupid.
Oh, the murder's out then!

Min.
(to Telemachus)
“Hear
Me for the last time, oh son of Ulysses!”

Cal.
What! “for the last time”—such a night as this is?
I beg your pardon;—wise as you may be,
That's anything but a wise speech for me.
Ladies and gentlemen, I beg to say,
I hope you won't be led by her away;
If you approve, I'll bet the prude a penny
That this will not be “the last time” by many
Telemachus shall listen to her voice,
Or I to yours—oh! let my heart rejoice
In those sweet sounds that now alone can cheer
The muffled drum of sad Calypso's ear;
Let no cross Mentor with some proverb stale
Our harmless nonsense weigh in reason's scale.
Remember Christmas comes but once a year,
And you have made success proverbial here;
Then “vogue la Galère” shall be my motto,
Or, as the boys say—“Don't forget the grotto:”
But on the strand when fortune drives your ships, O!
Take shelter in the island of Calypso.

Finale—“Merry may the Keel row.”
Cal.
As you come down Newcastle Street,
Oh let me hear you sing—
“Tis yonder lives Calypso,
Suppose we just look in.”
Though love is looking rather blue,
If you are not disappointed too,
I do not care a pin,
And merry may the keel row
The steamer my lad's in.

Chorus
—And merry may, &c.