University of Virginia Library

SCENE IV.

Enter SAGARINUS and STICHUS.
Sag.
You come forth,
And bring our equipage along—I make you
[to Stichus.
King of the keg—I am resolv'd our feast
Shall be to-day, in all respects well order'd.
As heaven shall save me! we shall sup politely,
Here, in this place—It is our will and pleasure,
Whoever passes joins our company.

Sti.
Agreed—So every man bring his own wine,
The tenths of Hercules will then be fuller;
None but ourselves shall suffer for our feasting.
Our supper's lonely, 'tis a sort of monotrophe,
We wait upon ourselves—'Tis well enough
For people of our rank—Nuts, beans, and figs,
A plate of olives, and a mess of lupines.
Enough's a feast—It best becomes us slaves
To moderate our expence, than to exceed—
Each one according to his station—They
Who're opulent, drink out of tankards, cups,
And bowls:—Our little Samian jug serves us;
And yet we live, and yet we cut our coat
According to our cloth.

Sag.
Should we not settle
On which side of our mistress each should sit?

Sti.
Be you above—Yet, let me tell you, friend,
I shall divide that with you—Say, which province
You'll undertake—

Sag.
What do you mean by province?

Sti.
Choose you of Fontinalis to be lord,
Or Bacchus?—

Sag.
O, of Bacchus to be sure.
But whilst our mistress's tricking out and curling,
Let us divert ourselves together.—I
Appoint you master of the feast, my Stichus.

Sti.
A lucky thought!—But 'twould become us more
On a hard bench to sit like Cynicks, than
To loll upon these couches.

Sag.
'Tis rare luxury—
But prithee tell me, master of the feast,
Why stands the goblet here, nor pass about?
How many cups are drank?

Sti.
Why, just as many,
As you have fingers on your hand—So says
The old Greek song—

[singing.]
Sag.
Here's to thee then in twice five cups—Be wise,
And pledge me—I drink thus to all of us—
Here's to thee, here's to me, here's to my love,
Stephanium—

Sti.
If you'll drink away then, drink.

Sag.
The cup shall never stand with me.

Sti.
I think
A decent feast, were but our mistress here!
Were she but come, there would be nothing wanting.

Sag.
Why that's well said.—Here's to you, boy, again—
You've wine?—O, for a dainty relisher!—

Sti.
If what is here don't please you, nothing will.
Here, take some water—

Sag.
Stichus, you are right.
None of your kickshaws—Piper, drink about—
Now mind your hits—You must drink this, by Hercules!
What! do you flinch?—I must have no refusal—
You see what must be done—And drink you shall.
Look to your hits, I say—Nay, take this cup.
The wine's not tax'd: You need not fear that here.
Come take your pipes out of your mouth.

Sti.
When he
Has drank his cup, mind you my rules, or else
Be toast-master yourself—I like not bumpers.
We shall have nothing soon to drink—By Pollux!
You'll turn the keg at this rate bottom upwards.

Sag.
What matters that?—Tho' you've drank pretty deep,
You are not cut—Come, Piper, when you've drank,
To it again—Come, quick, puff out your cheeks
Like any angry serpent—Let him, Stichus,
That breaks the rules, be fin'd a cup of wine.

Sti.
A good law that—And you shall have your will,
Because you ask but right—Mind it yourself:
For if you break it, I'll retain the forfeit.

Sag.
Why right again and just—

Sti.
Here's to you then—
And that's the first—'Tis droll enough to see
Two rivals on such terms—Drink from one cup
And kiss one wench—'Tis comical enough!
I you, you I, both of one mind in that.
Both love one wench.—With me! why, she's with you:
With you! with me—One envies not the other.

Sag.
Enough, enough—Let us have no ill omens.
Now could I be as playful as a kitten.
Say, shall we call her out?—And she shall dance.

Sti.
Agreed.

Sag.
My dear, my pretty one, my sweet
Stephanium, come forth; come to your loves—
You're fair enough for me.

Sti.
To me, most fair.

Sag.
Come, make us merry, as you always do
With your good company—We're just come home,
And long to see you—Honey, little Stephy—
If both be lovely in your eyes, your sweethearts,
Come forth—