University of Virginia Library

Actvs III.

Scena I.

Bright. Newcut. Plotwell. Rosclap. hanging out the picture of a strange fish.
Br.
Fore Jove the Captaine foxt him rarely.

Ros.
O Sir
He is used to it; this is the fift fish now
That he hath showne thus. One got him twenty pound.

New.
How Rosclap?

Ros.
Why the Captaine kept him, Sir,
A whole weeke drunk, and showd him twice a day.

New.
It could not be like this.

Ros.
Faith I doe grant
This is the strangest fish. yon I have hung
His other picture into th'fields, where some
Say tis an oregrowne Porcpisce; others say
Tis the fish caught in Cheshire; one to whom
The rest agree, said 'twas a Mermaid.

Plotw.
S'light,
Roseclap, shalt have a patent of him. The Birds
Brought from Peru, the hairy Wench, the Camel,
The Elephant, Dromedaries, or Winsor Castle,
The Woman with dead flesh, or She that washes,
Threds needles, writes, dresses her children, playes
Oth' Virginalls with her feet, could never draw
People like this.

New.
O that his Father were
At home to see him.

Plotw.
Or his Mother come,
Who followes strange sights out of Towne, and went
To Branford to a Motion.

Br.
Bid the Captaine hasten,
Or hee'l recover and spoile all.

Ros.
Th'are here.

Scena. II.

Enter Quartfield and Salewit drest like two Trumpeters, keeping the doore Mr s Seathrift and Mr s Holland with a Prentice before 'em as commers in.
Quart.
Bear back there.

Sale.
Pray you doe not presse so hard.

Quart.
Make roome for the two Gentlewomen.

Mrs Seath.
What ist?

Sal.
Twelve pence a peece.

Ms Holl.
We will not give't.

Q.
Make roome
For them that will then.

Plotw.
O fortune here's his Mother.

Br.
And who's the other?

Plotw.
One Ms Holland, the
Great seamstresse on th'Exchange.

Ms Holl.
We gave but a groat
To see the last fish.

Quart.
Gentlewoman, that
Was but an Irish Sturgeon.

Salew.
This came from
The Indies, and eats five Crownes a day in frye,
Oxe livers, and browne past.

Ms Seath.
Well there's three shillings,
Pray let us have good places now.

Quartf.
Beare back there.

Ms Holl.
Look Ms Seathrift here be Gentlemen.
Sure tis a rare Fish.

Ms Seath.
J know one of 'em,

Ms Holl.
And so doe I, his sister was my prentice.
Ms Seath, Lets take acquaintance with him.

Plotw.
Ms Seathrift.
Hath the sight drawne you hither?

Ms Seath.
Yes Sir I
And Mr s Holland here, my Gossip, past
This way and so cald in. Pray, Mr Plotwell,
Is not my sonne here? I was told he went
With you this morning.

Plotw.
You shall see him straight.

Ms Holl.
When will the Fish begin, Sir?

Br.
Heart she makes him
A puppet play.

Plotw.
Why now they only stay
For company, 't has sounded twice.

Ms Seath.
Indeed
I long to see this fish; J wonder whither
They will cut up his belly, they say a Tench
Will make him whole againe.

Ms Holl.
Look Ms Seathrift,
What clawes he has.

Ms Seath.
For all the world like Crabs.

Ms Holl.
Nay marke his feet too.

Ms Seath.
For all the world like Plaice.

Br.
Was ever better sport heard?

New.
Prythe peace.

Ms Holl.
Pray can you read that? Sir, I warrant you,
That tells where it was caught, and what fish tis.

Plotw.
Within this place is to be seene,
A wondrous Fish. God save the Queene.

Ms Holl.
Amen, she is my customer, And I
Have sold her bonelace often.

Br.
Why the Queene?
Tis writ the King.

Plotw.
That was to make the rime.

Br.
Slid thou didst read it as 'twere some picture of
An Elzabeth fish.

Quartf.
Bear back there.

Salew.
Make room, you
Friend that were going to cut a purse there, make
Way for the two old Gentlemen to passe.

Enter Ware-house & Seathrift disguis'd.
Wareh.
What must we give?

Quartf.
We take a shilling Sir.

Salew.
It is no lesse.

Seath.
Pray God your fish be worth it.
What is't a whale you take so deare?

Quart.
It is
A fish taken in the Indies.

Wareh.
Pray dispatch then,
And showt, us quickly.

Salew.
Pray forbeare, you'd have
Your head broke Cobler.

Wareh.
Yonder is my Nephew
In his old Gallantry.

Seath.
Who's there too? my wife?
And Ms Holland? Nay I lookt for them.
But where's my wise sonne?

Ware-h.
Masse I see not him.

Quartf.
Keep out Sir.

Salew.
Waterman you must not enter.

Cypher presses in like a waterman.
Quartf.
This is no place for scullers.

Cyph.
I must needs
Speak with one Mr Plotwell.

Quart.
You must stay.

Salew.
Thrust him out.

Cyph.
And one Mr Seathrift
They thrust him out.
On urgent businesse.

Salew.
They are yet imployd
In waightier affaires, make fast the doore.

Quartf.
There shall no more come in: come in boy.

Seat.
Dont
They speak as if my sonne were in the roome?

Ware-h.
Yes, pray observe & marke em.

Quartf.
Gentlemē,
And Gentlewomen, you now shall see a sight,
Drawes a Curtain behind it Timothy a sleepe like a strange fish.
Europe nere show'd the like; behold this fish.

Ms Holl.
O strange looke how it sleeps.

Br.
Iust like a Salmō
Upon a stall in fishstreet.

Ms Seath.
How it snorts too,
Just like my husband.

Ware-h.
Tis very like a man.

Seath.
'Thas such a nose and eyes.

Salew.
Why tis a Man fish;
An Ocean Centaure, begot between a Syren
And a he stockfish.

Seath.
Pray where tooke ye him?

Quartf.
We tooke him strangely in the Indies, neere
The mouth of Rio de la plata, a sleepe
Upon the shore just as you see him now.

Ms Holl.
How say y', a sleepe.

Ware-h.
How? would he come to land?

Seath.
Tis strange a fish should leave his Element.

Quartf.
Aske him what things the Coūtry told us.

Sal.
You
Will scarce believe it now. This fish would walke you
Two or three mile oth'shore sometimes; break houses,
Ravish a naked wench or two, (for there
Women goe naked) then runne to Sea againe.

Quartf.
The Country has bin laid, and warrants granted
To apprehend him.

Ware-h.
I doe suspect these fellowes,
They lye as if they had patent for't.

Seath.
The company
Should every one believe his part, would scarce
Have faith enough among us.

Ware-h.
Marke againe.

Salew.
The States of Holland would have bought him of us
Out of a great designe.

Seath.
Indeed?

Salew.
They offer'd
A thousand dollars.

Quart.
You cannot enter yet.

Some knock,
Ware.
Indeed? so much? pray what to doe?

Salew.
Why Sr,
They were in hope in time to make this fish
Of faction 'gainst the Spaniard, and doe service
Vnto the state.

Seath.
As how?

Salew.
Why, Sr, next plate-fleet
To dive, bore holes i'th bottome of their ships,
And sinke em; you must think a fish like this
May be taught Machiavel, and made a state-fish;

Plotw.
As dogs are taught to fetch.

New.
Or Elephants
To dance on ropes.

Br.
And pray what Honour would
The States have given him for the service?

Quartf.
That,
Sir, is uncertaine.

Salew.
Ha made him some sea Count;
Or't may be Admirall.

Plotw.
Then, sir, in time,
Dutch Authors that writ Mare Liberum,
Might dedicate their books to him?

Salew.
Yes being
A fish advanc't, and of great place. Sing boy.
You now shall heare a song upon him.

Br.
Listen

New.
Doe they not act it rarely?

Plotw.
If 'twere their trade
They could not doe it better.

Seath.
Heare you that sir?

Ware-h.
Still I suspect.

Ms Holl.
I warrant you this fish
Will shortly be in a Ballad.

Salew.
Begin boy

Song.
Ms Holl.
The song has wakned him, look, he stirres.

Tim.
Oh,
Captaine—pox—take—you—Captaine.

Ms Sea.
Hark he speaks.

Tim.
Oh-my—stomack.—

Wa.
How's this?

Se.
Ile pawn my life
This is imposture.

Tim.
Oh—Oh—

Plot.
Heart the Captaine
Did not give him his full load.

Wareh.
Can your fish
Speak friends? the proverb saies th'are mute

Qu.
Ile tell you
You will admire how docile he is, and how
Hee'l imitate a man; tell him your name
He will repeat it after you; he has heard me
Calld Captaine and my fellow curse sometimes,
And now you heard him say pox take you Captaine.

Salew.
And yesterday I but complaind my stomack
Was over chargd, & how he minds it?

New.
strange?

Br.
J is it not?

Plotw.
The towardnesse of a fish.

Salew.
Would you think when we caught him he should speak
Drake, Drake.

Br.
And did he?

Qu.
Yes and Hawkins;
A signe he was a fish that swum there, when
These two compast the world.

New.
How should he learne
Their names J wonder.

Salw.
From the saylers.

New.
That may be.

Qu.
He'l call for drink like me, or any thing
He lacks.

Tim.
O-God-my-head.—

Qu.
D'you heare him?

T.
Oh,
Hostesse—a—bason—

Plotw.
slid he'l spew.

Br.
No matter.

Quart.
Nay J have seene him foxt, and then maintaine
A drunken Dialogue.

Ms Holl.
Lord how J long
To heare a litle. Pray try him with some questions,
Will you, my friend?

Quartf.
Sometimes he will be sullen,
And make no answers.

Salew.
That is when he's angred,
Or kept from drinke long.

Quart.
But Ile try him:

Ms Sea.
Lord
To see what Creatures may be brought to.

Quart.
Tim,
You are drunke.

Tim.
Plague take you Captaine—Oh—
You—made—me—

Sea.
S'death my sonnes name.

Tim.
D' you call him?

Sal.
He'l answer to no name but that.

Q.
And Tim,
What thinke you of a wench now?

Tim.
Oh Ime sicke
Where is she, Oh.

Seath.
Ile lay my life this fish
Is some confederate Rogue.

Quart.
I drinke t'you, Timothy,
In sack.

Tim.
Oh Oh.

Quart.
A health, Tim.

Tim.
I can drink
No more, Oh.

Salew.
What not pledge your Mistresse?

Tim.
Oh,
Let me alone.

Salew.
He is not in the mood now.
Sometimes you'd wonder at him.

Quartf.
He is tired
With talking all this day. That and the heat
Of company about him, dull him.

Ware-h.
Surely,
My friends, it is to me a miracle
To heare Fish speak thus.

Quartf.
So, Sir, 't has been
To thousands more.

Salew.
Come now next Michaelmas,
Tis five yeares we have showne him in most Courts
In Christendome, and you will not believe
How with meere travelling and observation,
He has improv'd himselfe, and brought away
The language of the Country.

Seath.
May not I
Aske him some questions?

Quartf.
Sir, you may, but he
Will answer none but one of us.

Ms Sea.
He's used,
Knocking at doore.
And knowes their voices.

Salew.
He is so Ms. Now
We'l open doore.

Wareh.
Well my beliefe doth tell me
There is a mist before our eyes.

Seath.
I mar'le
My wise sonne mist this show.

Quart.
Good people, we
Doe show no more to day; if you desire
They draw the Curtaine before him.
To see, come to us in Kings-street to morrow.

Ms Holl.
Come Gossip let us goe, the Fish is done.

Ms Seath.
By your leave Gentlemen. Truly tis a dainty fish.

Exit Ms Seath. Ms Holland and Prentice.

Scena III.

Enter to them Cypher like a Water-man.
Cyph.
Pray which is Mr Plotwell?

Plotw.
I'me he friend,
What is your businesse?

Cyph.
Sir, I should speake with
Yong Mr Seathrift too.

Plotw.
Sir, at this time,
Although no Crab like you, to swim backward, he is
Of your element.

Cyph.
Upon the water?

Plotw.
No
But something that lives int. If you but stay
Till he have slept himselfe a land Creature, you may
Chance see him come a shore here.

Tim.
Oh—my—head—
Oh—Captaine—Mr Francis—Captaine—Oh.—

Plot.
That is his voice Sir.

Seath.
Death o my soule my son?

Cyph.
He is in drink, Sir, is he?

Plotw.
Surely friend,
You are a witch, he is so.

Cyph.
Then I must tell
The newes to you, tis sad.

Plotw.
Ile hear't as sadly.

Cyph.
Your Uncle, Sir, and Mr Seathrift are
Both drownd some 8 mile below Greenwitch.

Pl.
Drownd?

Cyph.
They went ith' Tilt boat, Sir, and J was one
Oth' oares that rowed 'em, a Cole-ship did ore run us,
I scapt by swimming, the two old Gentlemen
Took hold of one another, and sunk together.

Br.
How some mens prayers are heard? we did invoke
The sea this morning, and see, the Thames has took 'em.

Plotw.
It cannot be, such good newes, Gentlemen,
Cannot be true.

Ware-h.
Tis very certaine, Sir,
Twas talke upon th'Exchange.

Seath.
We heard it too
In Pauls now as we came.

Plotw.
There friend, there is
A fayre for you; I'me glad you scapt; I had
Gives him many.
Not knowne the newes so soone else.

Cyph.
Sir, excuse me,

Plot.
Sir, it is conscience; J doe believe you might
Sue me in Chancery.

Cyph.
Sir, you show
The vertues of an Heyre.

Ware-h.
Are you rich Ware-house
Heyre, Sir?

Plotw.
Yes, Sir, his transitory pelfe,
And some twelve hundred pound a yeare in earth,
Is cast on me. Captaine, the houre is come,
You shall no more drink Ale, of which one draught
Makes Cowards, and spoiles valour; nor take off
Your moderate quart-glasse. I intend to have
A Musket for you, or glasse Canon, with
A most capacious barrell, which we'l charge,
And discharge with the rich valiant grape of
My Uncles sellar, every charge shall fire
The glasse, and burne it selfe ith' filling, and look
Like a Peece going off.

Quartf.
I shall be glad
To give thanks for you, Sir, in pottle draughts,
And shall love Scotch cole for this wrack the better,
As long as I know fuell.

Plotw.
Then my Poet,
No longer shall write Catches, or thinne Sonnets,
Nor preach in verse, as if he were suborn'd
By him that wrote the whip, to pen leane Acts,
And so to overthrow the stage for want
Of salt or wit. Nor shall he need torment
Or persecute his Muse; but I will be
His God of wine t'inspire him. He shall no more
Converse with the five yard butler, who like Thunder
Can turne beere with his voice, and roare it sower;
But shall come forth a Sophocles, and write
Things for the Buskin. Insteed of Pegasus,
To strike a spring with's hoofe, we'l have a steele
Which shall but touch a But, and straight shall flow
A purer, higher, wealthier Helicon.

Salew.
Frank, Thou shalt be my Phœbus. My next Poem
Shall be thy Uncles Tragœdie or the life
And death of two Rich Merchants.

Plotw.
Gentlemen,
And now yfaith what think you of the fish?

Ware-h.
Why as we ought, Sir, strangely.

Br.
But d'you think
It is a very fish?

Seath.
Yes.

New.
Tis a man.

Plotw.
This valiant Captaine and this man of wit
First foxt him, then transform'd him. we will wake him
And tell him the newes. Ho Mr Timothy!

Tim.
Plague take you Captaine.

Plotw.
What does your sack work still?

Tim.
Where am I?

Plotw.
Come y'have slept enough.

Br.
Mr Timothy!
How in the name of fresh Cod came you changed
Into a sea Calfe thus?

New.
Slight, Sir, here be
Two Fishmongers to buy you; beat the price
Now y'are awake, your selfe.

Tim.
How's this? my hands
Transmuted into Clawes? my feet made flownders?
Arrayd in Finnes, and scales? arn't you
Ashamd to make me such a Monster? pray
Help to undresse me.

Plotw.
We have rare newes for you.

Tim.
No letter from the Lady I hope?

Plotw.
Your Father
And my grave Uncle, Sir, are cast away.

Tim.
How?

Plotw.
They by this have made a meale
For Jacks and Salmon. They are drownd.

Br.
Fall downe
And worship sea-coales, for a ship of them
Has made you, Sir, an Heyre.

Plotw.
This fellow here
Brings the auspicious newes: And these two friends
Of ours confirme it.

Cyph.
Tis too true, Sir.

Tim.
Well,
We are all mortall; but in what wet case
Had J been now, if I had gone with him.
Within this fortnight I had been converted
Into some Pike, you might ha cheapned me.
In Fish-street; J had made an Ordinary,
Perchance at the Mermaid: Now could I cry
Like any Image in a fountaine which
He faines to weepe.
Runs Lamentations. O my hard misfortune!

Seath.
Fie Sir, good truth it is not manly in you,
He feignes to weepe.
To weep for such a slight losse as a father.

Tim.
I doe not cry for that.

Seath.
No?

Tim.
no; but to think
My Mother is not drownd too.

Seath.
I assure you,
And thats a shrewd mischance.

Tim.
For then might I
Ha gone to th'Counting house and set at liberty
Those harmelesse Angels, which for many yeares
Have been condemnd to darknesse.

Plotw.
You'd not doe
Like your penurious Father, who was wont
To walk his dinner out in Pauls, whiles you
Kept Lent at home, and had, like folk in seiges,
Your meales weighed to you.

New.
Indeed they say he was
A Monument of Pauls.

Tim.
Yes, he was there
As constant as Duke Humphrey. I can show
The prints where he sate holes ith'loggs.

Plotw.
He wore
More pavement out with walking then would make
A row of new stone-Saints, and yet refused
To give to th'reparation.

Br.
I've heard
Heed make his Jack goe emptie to cousen neighbours.

Plotw.
Yes, when there was not fire enough to warme
A Mastick path t'apply to his wives Temples
In great extremity of toothach. This is
True, Mr Timothy, ist not?

Tim.
Yes. Then Linnen,
To us was stranger then to Capuchins.
My flesh is of an Order with wearing shirts
Made of the sacks that brought ore Cutchyneele,
Copprice, and Jndico, My sister weares
Smocks made of Curran-bags.

Seath.
Ile not endure it.
Lets show our selves.

Ware-h.
Stay heare all first.

New.
Thy Uncle
Was such another Plotwell; I have heard
He still last left th'Exchange; and would commend
The wholsomenesse oth' ayre in Moore-fields, when
The clock struck three sometimes.

Plotw.
Surely my selfe,
Cypher his Factor, and an ancient Cat,
Did keepe strict diet, had our Spanish fare,
Foure Olives among three. My Uncle would
Look fat with fasting; I ha knowne him surfet
Upon a bunch of Raysins, swoone at sight
Of a whole joynt, and rise an Epicure
They undisguise.
From halfe an Orage.

Ware-h.
Gentlemen tis false.
Cast off your Clowd. D'you know me, Sir?

Plotw.
My Uncle!

Sea.
And doe you know me, Sir?

Tim.
My Father!

War.
Nay,
We'l open all the plot, reveale your selfe.

Plotw.
Cypher the waterman!

Qu.
Salewit away;
Exit Qu. Salewit.
I feele a tempest comming.

Ware.
Are you struck
With a Torpedo Nephew?

Seath.
Ha you seen too
A Gorgons head that you stand speechlesse? or
Are you a fish in earnest?

Br.
It begins to thunder.

New.
We will make bold to take our leaves.

Ware.
What is
Your Captaine fled?

Seath.
Nay Gentlemen, forsake
Your Company?

Br.
Sir, we wave businesse.

Sea.
Troth
It is not kindly done.

War.
Now, Mr Seathrift,
Ex. Br. New.
You see what Mourners we had had, had we
Been wrackt in earnest. My grievd Nephew here
Had made my sellar flow with teares, my wines
Had chargd glasse Ord'nance, our funeralls had been
Bewaild in pottle draughts.

Seath.
And at our graves
Your Nephew and my Sonne had made a Panegyrick,
And opend all our vertues.

Wa.
Ungrateful Monster.

Sea.
Unnaturall villaine.

Wareh.
Thou Enimy to my bloud.

Sea.
Thou worse then Parricide.

War.
Next my sinnes I doe
Repent I am thy Uncle.

Sea.
And I thy Father.

Wareh.
Death O my soule, did J when first thy Father
Broke in estate, and then broke from the Counter
Where Mr Seathrift laid him in the hole,
For debt among the ruines of the City,
And Trades like him blowne up, take thee from dust,
Give thee free education, put thee in
My own faire way of traffique; nay decree
To leave thee Jewels, Land, my whole estate,
Pardond thy former wildnesse, and couldst thou sort
Thy selfe with none but idle Gallants, Captaines,
And Poets, who must plot before they eat,
And make each meale a stratagem? Then could none
But J be subject of thy impious scoffes?
I swoone at sight of meat; I rise a Glutton
From halfe an Orange; Wretch, forgetfull wretch;
Fore Heaven I count it treason in my bloud
That gives thee a relation. But J'le take
A full revenge. Make thee my Heyre? J'le first
Adopt a slave, brought from some Gally; One
Which Lawes doe put into the Inventory,
And men bequeath in Wills with stooles, & brasse pots.
One who shall first be houshold stuffe, then my Heyre.
Or to defeat all thy large aimes J'le marry;
Cypher, goe finde me Baneswright; he shall straight
Provide me a wife. I will not stay to let
My resolution coole. Be she a wench
That every day puts on her Dowry, weares
Her fortunes, has no portion, so she be
Young and likely to be fruitfull, J'le have her;
By all thats good I will; this afternoone;
I will about it straight.

Se.
I follow you.
Ex. Ware. Cyph.
And as for you Tim Mermaid, Triton, Haddock,
The wondrous Indian Fish caught neere Peru,
Who can be of both Elements, your sight
Will keep you well. Here J doe cast thee off,
And in thy roome pronounce to make thy sister
My heyre; it would be most unnaturall
To leave a Fish Land. Lasse, Sir, one of your
Bright finnes and gills must swim in seas of sack,
Spout rich Canaries up like Whales in Maps.
I know you'l not endure to see my Jack
Goe empty, nor weare shirts of Copprice bags,
Nor fast in Pauls, you. J doe hate thee now,
Worse then a Tempest, Quick-sand, Pyrate, Rock,
Or fatall Leake, I or a Privy seale.
Goe let the Captaine make you drunk, and let
Your next change be into some Ape, (tis stale
To be a Fish twice) or some active Baboone.
And when you can find mony out, betray
What wench ith' Roome has lost her maiden-head;
Can mount to'th King, and can doe all your feats,
If your fine chaine, and yellow coat come neere
Th'Exchange, Jle see you, so I leave you.

Plot.
Now
Ex. Sea.
Were there a dextrons beame and two-pence hemp,
Never had man such cause to hang himselfe.

Tim.
I have brought my selfe to a fine passe too Now
Am J fit only to be caught, and put
Into a pond to leap Carps, or beget
A goodly race of Pickrel.

Scena. IV.

To them Quartfield. Salewit. Roseclap, and Baneswright.
Quartf.
How now mad Lads, what? is the storme broke up?

Salew.
What sad like brokē Gamsters? Mr Timothy
'Slight who would think your Father should lay weeles
To catch you thus?

Tim.
If ever I be drunk
With Captaines more—.

Plotw.
Where's Bright and Newcut?
Were sent for to the Temple, but left word

Salew.
They
They would be here at supper.

Plotw.
They are sure friends,
To leave us in distresse:

Quartf.
What a mad plot
These two old Merchants had contriv'd, to faine
A voyage, then to hunt you out disguised,
And heare themselves abused?

Salew.
We heard all.

Quart.
If J had staid they had paid me for a Captaine.

Salew.
They had a fling at me. But doe you think
Your Uncle in this furious mood will marry?

Plotw.
He deeply swore it; if he doe, the slight
Upon the cards, the hollow dye, Park corner,
And Shooters hill are my revenue.

Tim.
Yes,
And as for me, my destiny will be
To fight by th'day, carry my Kitchen, and
Collation at my back, weare orderly
My shirt in course, after 't has been the shift
Of a whole Regiment in the Low-Countries.
And after all returne with halfe a leg,
One arme perchance, my nose shot off, to move
Compassion in my father, who in pitty
To so much ruine may be brought to buy
Some place for me in an Hospitall, to keep me
From Bridges, Hill-tops, & from selling switches.

Ent. Rosecl.
Ros.
Yonders your Uncle at the field dore talking
With Baneswright, as hot, and earnest for a wench,
As a recoverd Monsieur.

Quartf.
What is this Baneswright?

Salew.
A fellow much imploid about the Towne,
That contrives Matches. One that brings together
Parties that never saw, or ever met,
Till't be for good and all. Knowes to a penny
Estates and Joyntures; J'le undertake he has
Now lying by him unprovided some twenty
Widdowes of all fortunes that want husbands,
And men that want wives, and at an houres warning
Can make things ready for the Priest.

Quartf.
Let us
Devise to get him hither and crosse the Match.

Plotw.
I have great interest in him, the fellow loves me.
Could I speake with him and draw him to be
An Actor in't, J have a stratagem
That can redeeme all, and turne the plot
Enter Baneswright.
Upon these sage heads.

Salew.
By Minerva, look,
Heres Baneswright.

Plot.
Mr Baneswright!

Ban.
Save you Gallants.

Plotw.
You are imploid I heare to find a wife out
For my young sprightly Uncle.

Banes.
Sir, he has
Retain'd me to that purpose. I just now
Came from him.

Plotw.
And doe you meane the match
Shall then proceed?

Banesw.
I have a Leiger wench
In readinesse, he's gone to put himselfe
Into fit ornaments, for the solemnitie.
I'me to provide the Priest and Licence, we goe
Some two houres hence to Church.

Qu.
Death you Pander,
Forbid the banes or I will cut your wizzell;
And spoile your squiring in the dark; J've heard
Of your lewd function, Sirrah; you preferre
Wenches to Bawdy-houses, Rascall.

Banesw.
Good, Sir.
Threaten me not in my vocation.

Plotw.
Why Baneswright you can be but paid, say I
Procure the wench, a friend of mine; and double
Your bargaine, such a faire reward me thinks
Should make thee of my project. Thou dost know
My fortunes are ingaged, and thou maist be
The happy instrument to recover 'em.
Be my good Angell once, I have a plot
Shall make thee famous.

Quartf.
By Mars deny, and I
Will act a Tragœdy upon thee.

Banes.
Gentlemen,
I am a friend to wit, but more to you, Sir.
Of whose misfortunes I will not be guilty.
Though, then, your Uncle have imploid me, and
Have deeply sworne to wed this afternoone,
A wife of my providing, if you can
O'rereach the angry Burgesse, Sir, and bring
His wisdome to the Ginne, show me the way
I'le help to lay the trap.

Quartf.
Now thou art
An honest hearted pimp, thou shalt for this
Be drunk in Vine Dee, Rascall: I'le begin
A Runlet to thee.

Plotw.
Gentlemen lets in,
I'le tell you my designe; you, Salewit, must
Transforme yourselfe to a French Deacon. J
have parts for Bright and Newcut too. Mischiefe
Upon their absence.

Salew.
Wee'l send for 'em.

Plot.
And
For Mr Timothy J have a project
Shall make his father everlastingly
Admire his wit, and aske him blessing.

Quart.
Come,
Lets in and drink a health to our successe.

Tim.
I'me for no healths unlesse the glasse be lesse.

Exeunt.