An Original Collection of Songs sung at the Theatres Royal, Public Concerts &c. &c. By W. T. Moncrieff |
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CUPID'S COOKERY BOOK. |
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 | An Original Collection of Songs |  |
147
CUPID'S COOKERY BOOK.
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Sung with universal applause by Mr. G. Ford and Mr. J. W. Sharp. Music, by Auber, sold by Duncombe and Moon, 17, High Holborn
All you who love feasts, at which Hymen is cook,
A receipt take from “Cupid's Own Cookery Book.”
If a match you would make, you will find this the plan—
Catch a young gent and lady, as fresh as you can.
Let the young gent be raw and soft, though the male gender,
And take care the young lady is equally tender.
To dinner the gentleman set down to table,
And pour as much wine in as ever you're able—
And, whilst he is soaking—attend, pray, to this—
Every now and then pop in a word about Miss,
But do it with care, or the match you may spoil,
And you'll find he'll be very soon ready to boil.
A receipt take from “Cupid's Own Cookery Book.”
If a match you would make, you will find this the plan—
Catch a young gent and lady, as fresh as you can.
Let the young gent be raw and soft, though the male gender,
And take care the young lady is equally tender.
To dinner the gentleman set down to table,
And pour as much wine in as ever you're able—
And, whilst he is soaking—attend, pray, to this—
Every now and then pop in a word about Miss,
But do it with care, or the match you may spoil,
And you'll find he'll be very soon ready to boil.
The moment your gent in the gills becomes red,
See, poor fellow, he's into the drawing-room led—
Set him down by the lady, though shy he may be,
And sop them both equally well with green tea—
Lead them to the piano—the handiest of things—
And blow up the flame till the young lady sings—
But the first sigh you hear the young gentleman puff,
Take them off, for they then will be both warm enough.
Put them then by themselves—they'll not think you presume—
In the most retired corner there is in the room,
Or else on a sofa, tete a tete, the pair leave,
And there let them simmer the rest of the eve.
See, poor fellow, he's into the drawing-room led—
Set him down by the lady, though shy he may be,
And sop them both equally well with green tea—
Lead them to the piano—the handiest of things—
And blow up the flame till the young lady sings—
But the first sigh you hear the young gentleman puff,
Take them off, for they then will be both warm enough.
Put them then by themselves—they'll not think you presume—
In the most retired corner there is in the room,
Or else on a sofa, tete a tete, the pair leave,
And there let them simmer the rest of the eve.
Two or three times, successive this plan must be tried,
Taking care that the parties are placed side by side,
And you'll find this a truth is—deny it you can't—
They'll be ready for marriage whenever you want.
After marriage, more care you must take than before,
As 'tis known they are very apt then to turn sour.
The honeymoon o'er, and departed the zest,
Howe'er well and tasty they both may be dress'd.
Attend to these hints, and a match you may make,
Whene'er to dish one up the pains you may take.
A receipt for which vain you'll in Mrs. Glass look,
As it's copied from “Cupid's Own Cookery Book.”
Taking care that the parties are placed side by side,
And you'll find this a truth is—deny it you can't—
They'll be ready for marriage whenever you want.
148
As 'tis known they are very apt then to turn sour.
The honeymoon o'er, and departed the zest,
Howe'er well and tasty they both may be dress'd.
Attend to these hints, and a match you may make,
Whene'er to dish one up the pains you may take.
A receipt for which vain you'll in Mrs. Glass look,
As it's copied from “Cupid's Own Cookery Book.”
| An Original Collection of Songs | |