Nuptial Dialogues and Debates Or, An Useful Prospect of the felicities and discomforts of a marry'd life, Incident to all Degrees, from the Throne to the Cottage. Containing, Many great Examples of Love, Piety, Prudence, Justice, and all the excellent Vertues, that largely contribute to the true Happiness of Wedlock. Drawn from the Lives of our own Princes, Nobility, and other Quality, in Prosperity and Adversity. Also the fantastical Humours of all Fops, Coquets, Bullies, Jilts, fond Fools, and Wantons; old Fumblers, barren Ladies, Misers, parsimonious Wives, Ninnies, Sluts and Termagants; drunken Husbands, toaping Gossips, schismatical Precisians, and devout Hypocrites of all sorts. Digested into serious, merry, and satyrical Poems, wherein both Sexes, in all Stations, are reminded of their Duty, and taught how to be happy in a Matrimonial State. In Two Volumes. By the Author of the London Spy [i.e. Edward Ward] |
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| XV. |
| XVI. |
| XVII. | Dialogue XVII. Between a prudent Gentleman, and his obliging
Lady, about her keeping Company with a certain Gentlewoman of a slender Reputation.
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| XIX. |
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| XXX. |
| XXXI. |
| XXXII. |
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 | Nuptial Dialogues and Debates |  |
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Dialogue XVII. Between a prudent Gentleman, and his obliging Lady, about her keeping Company with a certain Gentlewoman of a slender Reputation.
Husband.You're welcome Home my Dear; you're come at last.
I thought you long; 'tis ten a Clock, or past.
What made you, Child, continue out so late?
You said, at farthest, you'd return by eight.
A modest Wife should have Respect to Time;
To break your Word, is a provoking Crime.
Where have you been, my Dear, that you could be
So thoughtless of your self, as well as me?
Wife.
Pray, Dear, excuse me: 'Tis a Fault, I own
I did not think you'd be at Home so soon.
You know my Bus'ness chiefly was to pay
A formal Visit to my Lady Gay;
But coming early thence, before 'twas dark,
I stept to Madam Daphne's near the Park,
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The Ev'ning slipt away I know not how;
Tho' when it prov'd so very late, I'll swear
It vex'd me, that so long I'd tarry'd there,
'Less you should think I'd been the Lord knows where.
Husband.
Why will you keep her Company? You know
I've begg'd that you no more would thither go.
Her Air's too wanton, and her Tongue to free;
I fear she breaks the Rules of Modesty.
Her Looks betray the Looseness of her Mind,
And her Mein shews she is to Ill inclin'd.
Besides, her Reputation is not clear;
I care not to repeat the Things I hear.
She's censur'd as a Woman of Intrigue,
And that she's with a Captain now in League:
Nay, worse; for some don't scruple to report
She once was pregnant by a Lord at Court;
And that his Father, to reward her Shame,
Allows her now a Stipend for the same,
I've hinted this before, and must you still
Make her your Crony, 'gainst your Husband's Will?
Indeed, my Dear, I'm much concern'd to find
You should be so imprudent and unkind.
Wife.
Fame oft reports what none can make appear,
And Envy talks what Justice hates to hear.
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What should not be too eas'ly credited.
Censure's an Evil very few avoid,
And Innocence thereby is much annoy'd.
The Good must suffer, whilst the Bad go free;
The last are safe in their Majority;
Whilst Vertue oft is scandaliz'd aloud,
To make her level with the guilty Crowd.
The modest Dame, who little says, is thought
The silent Sow, that drinks up all the Draught.
The merry Gossiip is too bold and free,
Her wanton Carriage shews her Levity.
The pious Maid, tho' righteous as a Saint,
Does only for a Spark the Church frequent.
The devout Wife must horn her Husband's Brows,
And only goes to Pray'rs to cheat her Spouse.
In short, no Woman, be she ne'er so just,
Can live exempt from wicked Man's Distrust;
For she that scorns to yield to his Delight,
The envious Letcher injures out of spite;
Lessens and damns those Charms beyond his reach,
As Sportsmen curse the Hare they cannot catch.
I hope, my Dear, you have not been deny'd,
And therefore wrong what you in vain have try'd;
For I could ne'er in Daphne's Looks or Mein
Discover what you've heard, or what you've seen.
Therefore, my Dearest, tho', for ought I know,
She may be bad, I scarce can think her so.
Why therefore should you judge so hardly by her,
Since common Fame is but a common Lyar.
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But if she's thought to be a wanton Dame,
And spiteful Tongues have fix'd the evil Shame,
What tho' the Fact is not believ'd by you,
If once the World affirms it, then it's true;
Or tho' its false, the Calumny sticks fast,
And will the nicest Reputation blast?
The heav'nly Truths we must allow divine,
Those above Falshood will for ever shine;
But worldly Truths are what the World receive,
And Falshood only what we misbelieve;
Therefore if common Fame reports her lewd,
It is in vain for you to say she's good.
If you pretend t'extenuate her Disgrace,
Your self will only be believ'd as base:
She, for your Friendship, will no better fare,
But you, in her defence, will surely share
The worst Reproaches that her Name does bear.
Why then, my Dear, will you so foolish prove,
T'incur those Scandals which you can't remove.
Consider, female Reputation's nice,
The only Gem a Woman ought to prize.
It's hard to raise, but easy to exhaust,
And ne'er can be regain'd, when once it's lost.
No matter, whether blemish'd, right or wrong,
By her own Actions, or a spiteful Tongue,
If busy Fame has spread the ill Report,
She'll still be number'd with the looser Sort.
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Her Conversation, 'less in Time you share
Her publick Fame, and odious Character.
Wife.
I own I am not willing to be thought
A wanton Wretch, when guiltless of a Fau't;
Tho' I believe she's injur'd and abus'd,
And knows no Ills of which she stands accus'd;
Yet, since you tell me such Reports are spread,
And by so many talk'd and credited,
Without my Knowledge, there may be some Fire,
From whence such Smother may at first aspire.
Therefore, my Dear, your kind Advice I'll take,
And from this Hour her Company forsake.
I meant no Harm, nor shall you find I'll do
The least Offence that shall displeasure you;
For I have Sense to know my sacred Trust,
And shall obey in all Things that are just;
For stubborn Wives, who foolishly pursue
Those headstrong Humours which too oft they shew,
Make themselves wretched, and their Husband's too.
Husband.
Your kind Compliance with my small Request,
Assures me in a Wife I'm highly blest;
And, to my Satisfaction, serves to prove
At once your Duty, Innocence, and Love.
I must confess I was disturb'd to see
My Dear so fond of such loose Company;
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Than your Misconduct disoblig'd before;
And since I've so prevail'd, that you intend
No future Visits to so ill a Friend,
With your Desires I'll evermore comply,
And nothing that a Wife can ask, deny;
For she that will obey, deserves to find
The Man she loves, just, generous, and kind.
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