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 | Poems on divers subjects |  |
Non laudem quæro, nec culpam timeo.
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BRIBERY and SIMONY: OR, A SATYR Against the Corrupt use of MONEY.
Money! thou universal Indian Curse,
That shuns the Poor, and fills the Miser's Purse,
That tempts the needy Rogue to meet his Fate,
And makes the wary prosp'rous Villain great;
That sets the Dunce, the Coward, and the Knave,
Above the Wise, the Honest, and the Brave,
And makes the learn'd experienc'd Head bow low,
To empty upstart Fools that nothing know.
That shuns the Poor, and fills the Miser's Purse,
That tempts the needy Rogue to meet his Fate,
And makes the wary prosp'rous Villain great;
That sets the Dunce, the Coward, and the Knave,
Above the Wise, the Honest, and the Brave,
And makes the learn'd experienc'd Head bow low,
To empty upstart Fools that nothing know.
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Money long since the vast Distinction gave
Betwixt the Mighty, Noble, and the Slave;
'Twas thee the Lordly Difference first began,
And set the Master so above the Man:
Not Right, but Riches, gives to some the sway,
And makes the starving Multitude obey;
'Tis Wealth alone does at such distance place
The Country Gaffer, from his Courtly Grace,
For pompous Titles (tho' conferr'd by Kings)
Uncrown'd with solid Wealth, are empty things;
Such Royal Marks no Pauper's Wants can skreen,
But make the Wretch more despicably mean:
Badges of Honour haughty Minds may please,
But wiser Heads scarce think them worth their Fees
'Tis true, the City oft sends forth a Tool,
Who barters Money to be dub'd Sir Fool;
But what vain Prodigal would humour Pride,
At such Expence, except to please his Bride;
But if the Knight grows Poor, the stately Toy
Becomes the Scorn of ev'ry 'Prentice-Boy;
For needy Honour, like a King subdu'd,
Moves but Contempt and Laughter in the Crowd:
'Tis Wealth alone that raises our Esteem,
It gives all Pow'r, and is the only Jem
That adds an awful Lustre to the Diadem.
Betwixt the Mighty, Noble, and the Slave;
'Twas thee the Lordly Difference first began,
And set the Master so above the Man:
Not Right, but Riches, gives to some the sway,
And makes the starving Multitude obey;
'Tis Wealth alone does at such distance place
The Country Gaffer, from his Courtly Grace,
For pompous Titles (tho' conferr'd by Kings)
Uncrown'd with solid Wealth, are empty things;
Such Royal Marks no Pauper's Wants can skreen,
But make the Wretch more despicably mean:
Badges of Honour haughty Minds may please,
But wiser Heads scarce think them worth their Fees
'Tis true, the City oft sends forth a Tool,
Who barters Money to be dub'd Sir Fool;
But what vain Prodigal would humour Pride,
At such Expence, except to please his Bride;
But if the Knight grows Poor, the stately Toy
Becomes the Scorn of ev'ry 'Prentice-Boy;
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Moves but Contempt and Laughter in the Crowd:
'Tis Wealth alone that raises our Esteem,
It gives all Pow'r, and is the only Jem
That adds an awful Lustre to the Diadem.
Gold is the Monarch, Argent is the Queen,
That rule the World and sway the Hearts of Men;
Princes themselves those Indian Gods adore,
And barter Christian Lives for Heath'nish Ore,
To stamp their Sacred Image on their Coin,
That wicked Mammon, and the Prince Divine
Join'd in one Piece, may both together shine;
But tho' the Gold's adorn'd with Royal Face,
Casting a watchful Eye tow'rds Heaven's Grace,
Yet in this Age each Idiot's grown so wise,
To know the Value in the Substance lies;
And if the Touchstone proves the Mettle base,
They prize no Cæsar's Image, or God's Grace.
That rule the World and sway the Hearts of Men;
Princes themselves those Indian Gods adore,
And barter Christian Lives for Heath'nish Ore,
To stamp their Sacred Image on their Coin,
That wicked Mammon, and the Prince Divine
Join'd in one Piece, may both together shine;
But tho' the Gold's adorn'd with Royal Face,
Casting a watchful Eye tow'rds Heaven's Grace,
Yet in this Age each Idiot's grown so wise,
To know the Value in the Substance lies;
And if the Touchstone proves the Mettle base,
They prize no Cæsar's Image, or God's Grace.
Gold, tho' so pow'rful, yet thou'rt oft misus'd,
By those that love thee most thou'rt most abus'd;
The Miser, tho' he dotes upon thy Charms,
And with thy Looks his craving Fancy warms,
Yet places o'er thee his Vulcanian Guard,
And so close hugs thee that he gripes too hard;
So the fond Husband of a Beauteous Wife,
To keep secure the Comfort of his Life,
Confines her close, or watches her with Spies,
Lest some should rob him of his Charming Prize.
By those that love thee most thou'rt most abus'd;
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And with thy Looks his craving Fancy warms,
Yet places o'er thee his Vulcanian Guard,
And so close hugs thee that he gripes too hard;
So the fond Husband of a Beauteous Wife,
To keep secure the Comfort of his Life,
Confines her close, or watches her with Spies,
Lest some should rob him of his Charming Prize.
Money o'er all things bears a sov'reign Sway,
And thro' the World makes needy Fools obey,
Subdues as well the Avaritious Great,
And rules the Hearts of Kings, as they the State;
Makes them oft break those solemn Words they've given,
That should be binding as the Laws of Heaven;
Dishonour that Majestick Pow'r they hold,
And wave their Scepters to the Idol, Gold.
And thro' the World makes needy Fools obey,
Subdues as well the Avaritious Great,
And rules the Hearts of Kings, as they the State;
Makes them oft break those solemn Words they've given,
That should be binding as the Laws of Heaven;
Dishonour that Majestick Pow'r they hold,
And wave their Scepters to the Idol, Gold.
False flatt'ring Favourites, who on Princes wait,
And by their Cringes make them seem more great;
For base bye Ends their humble Fawnings pay,
Gold makes them bow, dissemble, and obey,
And Gold, for which they serve, will tempt them to betray.
So the poor worthless Cur, for nothing Good,
Fawns most, because he least deserves his Food;
But when by some new Hand he's better fed,
He leaves his Master, who the Mungril bred.
And by their Cringes make them seem more great;
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Gold makes them bow, dissemble, and obey,
And Gold, for which they serve, will tempt them to betray.
So the poor worthless Cur, for nothing Good,
Fawns most, because he least deserves his Food;
But when by some new Hand he's better fed,
He leaves his Master, who the Mungril bred.
Money, the Tyrant's Lust, and Soul of Pow'r,
The Teeth by which the Rich the Poor devour,
The Judges Fav'rite, and the Client's Friend,
The Jury's Conscience, who the Cause must end;
Bag'd up in Bribes around the Darling flies,
She talks, perswades, she conquers, and she buys;
On every Court clandestinely she calls,
And for her sake the Pleader sweats and bawls;
No adverse Pauper can withstand her Might,
The Cause sh'espouses most is always right:
Thus Justice, who is blind to either side,
Has now got Money for her partial Guide;
Who leads the hood-wink'd Dame from Court to Court,
And makes the purblind Tool a publick Sport;
Who, in this Age has lost her Christian Fame,
And is so chang'd she's nothing but a Name,
Which grisly Foxes by the Court made Great,
In awful Robes most gravely celebrate,
To cheat the foolish World, and serve the wiser State.
The Teeth by which the Rich the Poor devour,
The Judges Fav'rite, and the Client's Friend,
The Jury's Conscience, who the Cause must end;
Bag'd up in Bribes around the Darling flies,
She talks, perswades, she conquers, and she buys;
On every Court clandestinely she calls,
And for her sake the Pleader sweats and bawls;
No adverse Pauper can withstand her Might,
The Cause sh'espouses most is always right:
Thus Justice, who is blind to either side,
Has now got Money for her partial Guide;
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And makes the purblind Tool a publick Sport;
Who, in this Age has lost her Christian Fame,
And is so chang'd she's nothing but a Name,
Which grisly Foxes by the Court made Great,
In awful Robes most gravely celebrate,
To cheat the foolish World, and serve the wiser State.
Money! to make thy Empire more compleat,
The Heav'nly Sisters to thy Pow'r submit;
Religion dotes on thy commanding Charms,
And Vertue seeks to hug thee in her Arms;
The craving Prelate, who against thee rails,
Calls thee base Dross, and damns thee Teeth and Nails,
Making thee seem, thro' his Scholastick Skill,
Hell's wicked Agent, and the Root of Ill;
Yet tho' the holy Satyr pelts thee more,
Than yawning Schismatick does Babel's Whore;
No sooner from his Pulpit he descends,
But he esteems thee best of all his Friends,
And stumbles at no Simony to gain
The Dross he held so worthless and so vain:
But does the Church as well as World deceive,
And sells what only he has right to give;
Which should the just Reward of Vertue be,
T'encourage Learning, Truth, and Piety;
Inable Guides well qualify'd to preach,
Who strive to practice what they toil to teach:
Men who the Glory of the Church would raise,
Attend their Flocks, be watchful of their Strays,
And by their own correct Examples show,
God's Will they do, and Heaven's Laws they know.
The Heav'nly Sisters to thy Pow'r submit;
Religion dotes on thy commanding Charms,
And Vertue seeks to hug thee in her Arms;
The craving Prelate, who against thee rails,
Calls thee base Dross, and damns thee Teeth and Nails,
Making thee seem, thro' his Scholastick Skill,
Hell's wicked Agent, and the Root of Ill;
Yet tho' the holy Satyr pelts thee more,
Than yawning Schismatick does Babel's Whore;
No sooner from his Pulpit he descends,
But he esteems thee best of all his Friends,
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The Dross he held so worthless and so vain:
But does the Church as well as World deceive,
And sells what only he has right to give;
Which should the just Reward of Vertue be,
T'encourage Learning, Truth, and Piety;
Inable Guides well qualify'd to preach,
Who strive to practice what they toil to teach:
Men who the Glory of the Church would raise,
Attend their Flocks, be watchful of their Strays,
And by their own correct Examples show,
God's Will they do, and Heaven's Laws they know.
But Money, thou in every Cause art all,
And Gold is now become Episcopal:
To Copes and Mitres thou'rt a welcome Guest,
And makes them oft ordain a Dunce a Priest:
Triumphant o'er the Hierarchy it rides,
And fills Fat Livings but with Feeble Guides,
Who swell in Pulpits, where they proudly preach,
And with Contempt look down on those they teach.
Some grac'd with Scarves at unexperienc'd Years,
Disdain the Desk, and are too big for Pray'rs;
Made Prodigal by Nobles, they profane
The Badge of Doctor, long before they're Men;
Submit in private to their Patron's Gripe,
And gain good Livings e're their Brains are ripe.
And Gold is now become Episcopal:
To Copes and Mitres thou'rt a welcome Guest,
And makes them oft ordain a Dunce a Priest:
Triumphant o'er the Hierarchy it rides,
And fills Fat Livings but with Feeble Guides,
Who swell in Pulpits, where they proudly preach,
And with Contempt look down on those they teach.
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Disdain the Desk, and are too big for Pray'rs;
Made Prodigal by Nobles, they profane
The Badge of Doctor, long before they're Men;
Submit in private to their Patron's Gripe,
And gain good Livings e're their Brains are ripe.
Well may the unlearn'd Layman worship Gold,
Since Christian-Flocks, like Geese, are bought and sold;
What Conscience will endure a Starving Faith,
When Priests seek Heaven in a Golden Path;
But where his Int'rest lies that Church maintain,
And save himself as cheap as e'er he can.
Well may the foolish Sheep mistake their way,
Since Mammon does the Belweathers betray,
And leads our Avaritious Guides astray.
Since Christian-Flocks, like Geese, are bought and sold;
What Conscience will endure a Starving Faith,
When Priests seek Heaven in a Golden Path;
But where his Int'rest lies that Church maintain,
And save himself as cheap as e'er he can.
Well may the foolish Sheep mistake their way,
Since Mammon does the Belweathers betray,
And leads our Avaritious Guides astray.
In this good Age, when Christian Zealots join
In Clubs, to talk Religion o'er their Wine,
And pious Porters, when they meet ne'er fail,
To make it Nutmeg to their Toast and Ale;
Yet should a Calf like Aaron's be advanc'd,
Idolatry would soon be countenanc'd:
Let but the State to try Man's Faith declare,
Who worship'd should have little to a share;
What stiffneck'd Christian, nay, what stubborn Priest
Would not bow down before the Wealthy Beast,
Rather than lose his part of such a Golden Feast?
For Gold we now, like Heathens, hold Divine,
Tho' not in Calves, we worship it in Coine;
Then since the tempting Metal Man ensnares,
And not the Artificial Form it bears;
What's matter into what strange Shape 'tis made,
Whether a Calf, or stamp't with Cæsar's Head;
For by the Christian Law the Sin's as great,
To worship Cæsar's Image stamp'd on Plate,
As 'tis the Picture of the Roman Goose,
For Man's no more a De'ty than a Mouse.
In Clubs, to talk Religion o'er their Wine,
And pious Porters, when they meet ne'er fail,
To make it Nutmeg to their Toast and Ale;
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Idolatry would soon be countenanc'd:
Let but the State to try Man's Faith declare,
Who worship'd should have little to a share;
What stiffneck'd Christian, nay, what stubborn Priest
Would not bow down before the Wealthy Beast,
Rather than lose his part of such a Golden Feast?
For Gold we now, like Heathens, hold Divine,
Tho' not in Calves, we worship it in Coine;
Then since the tempting Metal Man ensnares,
And not the Artificial Form it bears;
What's matter into what strange Shape 'tis made,
Whether a Calf, or stamp't with Cæsar's Head;
For by the Christian Law the Sin's as great,
To worship Cæsar's Image stamp'd on Plate,
As 'tis the Picture of the Roman Goose,
For Man's no more a De'ty than a Mouse.
But wo is that Lay-Patron or Divine,
Who basely sells the Cure of Souls for Coin;
For Guides that purchase we may justly fear,
Will cheat the List'ning Flocks beneath their Care,
And fell their Heav'nly Sustenance too dear;
The Priest that buys will all Advantage take,
And the best Market of his Function make:
The Patron's Bonds too much in Mind he bears,
And lays, like Rome, base Taxes on his Pray'rs:
The needy Sick may unprepar'd expire,
Who cannot pay Heav'n's Labourer his Hire;
But when the wealthy Miser gasps for Breath,
The Parish Crow attends the Carrion's Death,
Applies his Balm the wounded Soul to heal,
Prays till he sweats with all external Zeal,
In hopes to be remembred in his Will.
Who basely sells the Cure of Souls for Coin;
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Will cheat the List'ning Flocks beneath their Care,
And fell their Heav'nly Sustenance too dear;
The Priest that buys will all Advantage take,
And the best Market of his Function make:
The Patron's Bonds too much in Mind he bears,
And lays, like Rome, base Taxes on his Pray'rs:
The needy Sick may unprepar'd expire,
Who cannot pay Heav'n's Labourer his Hire;
But when the wealthy Miser gasps for Breath,
The Parish Crow attends the Carrion's Death,
Applies his Balm the wounded Soul to heal,
Prays till he sweats with all external Zeal,
In hopes to be remembred in his Will.
Gold! 'tis for thee our Counsels are betray'd,
Statesmen by thy kind Influence are sway'd;
Hearts that should secret as the Grave remain,
Break thro' their Oaths, and divulge all for Gain:
Few Tongues so faithful that can Silence hold,
When tempted safely to betray with Gold;
Grave Senators, tho' ne'er so Rich and Great
Will still be nibling at the shining Bait;
Its pleasing Lustre dazles Humane Eyes,
And takes sometimes the Honest by surprise;
Who by the glorious Sight are so o'ercome,
They think of nothing but the pow'rful Summ;
Forget how vilely they abuse their Trust,
And make the Ills they are to do seem Just.
Statesmen by thy kind Influence are sway'd;
Hearts that should secret as the Grave remain,
Break thro' their Oaths, and divulge all for Gain:
Few Tongues so faithful that can Silence hold,
When tempted safely to betray with Gold;
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Will still be nibling at the shining Bait;
Its pleasing Lustre dazles Humane Eyes,
And takes sometimes the Honest by surprise;
Who by the glorious Sight are so o'ercome,
They think of nothing but the pow'rful Summ;
Forget how vilely they abuse their Trust,
And make the Ills they are to do seem Just.
For Gold, contending Factions toil and sweat,
And Pro and Con so painfully debate;
For thee the Crafty quarrel with the Throne,
And to the publick Good prefer their own;
Each steers and labours for the Golden Coast,
The main Dispute is, who shall gain the most:
'Tis In'trest makes each Party disagree,
They clash, they jangle, and contend for thee;
All sides would raise their Fortunes in the Sate,
The Weak behold the rising Pow'r with hate,
And every Goose grows mad to see the Fox so great.
And Pro and Con so painfully debate;
For thee the Crafty quarrel with the Throne,
And to the publick Good prefer their own;
Each steers and labours for the Golden Coast,
The main Dispute is, who shall gain the most:
'Tis In'trest makes each Party disagree,
They clash, they jangle, and contend for thee;
All sides would raise their Fortunes in the Sate,
The Weak behold the rising Pow'r with hate,
And every Goose grows mad to see the Fox so great.
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Those in low Spheres impatient to aspire,
Watch all their Motions who are posted higher,
Seek to detect the Faults of those above,
And labour to procure a new remove;
Not that the publick Welfare is their aim,
But that themselves may play the winning Game;
So Bowling Rooks can with no Patience rest,
To see their Adversary's Cast lie best,
But knock him from his place by throwing home,
And win the End by lodging in his room.
Watch all their Motions who are posted higher,
Seek to detect the Faults of those above,
And labour to procure a new remove;
Not that the publick Welfare is their aim,
But that themselves may play the winning Game;
So Bowling Rooks can with no Patience rest,
To see their Adversary's Cast lie best,
But knock him from his place by throwing home,
And win the End by lodging in his room.
The lesser Fry who can no Merit plead;
But follow those 'tis their desire should lead;
They too inspir'd with Envy by the rest,
Calumniate those in higher Stations blest,
And when 'twill serve that Int'rest they adore
They shew their Teeth, tho' destitute of Pow'r,
And sit like Mungrils barking at the Moon,
In hopes to fetch the Lofty Being down;
These but like Finders to the Greyhounds fare,
They beat the Bush, but others catch the Hare;
Yet hopes of Pow'r deludes them to be Tools,
And makes Industrious Knaves of Busie Fools,
Who covet Places only for the Wealth
They think to gain by Bribery and Stealth;
And from their own base Principles accuse
Just Men of Ills themselves desire to use;
So sharping Gamesters, who can Cog the Dice,
Expert in each foul Politick Device,
Suspect what others fairly win at play,
And think they use the same clandestine way.
But follow those 'tis their desire should lead;
They too inspir'd with Envy by the rest,
Calumniate those in higher Stations blest,
And when 'twill serve that Int'rest they adore
They shew their Teeth, tho' destitute of Pow'r,
And sit like Mungrils barking at the Moon,
In hopes to fetch the Lofty Being down;
These but like Finders to the Greyhounds fare,
They beat the Bush, but others catch the Hare;
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And makes Industrious Knaves of Busie Fools,
Who covet Places only for the Wealth
They think to gain by Bribery and Stealth;
And from their own base Principles accuse
Just Men of Ills themselves desire to use;
So sharping Gamesters, who can Cog the Dice,
Expert in each foul Politick Device,
Suspect what others fairly win at play,
And think they use the same clandestine way.
The fighting Hero that delights in Wars,
Whose Sword's his Voucher, and his Pride his Scars,
Who dreads Dishonour more than sudden Fate,
And is by Blood and Wounds made desperate;
Who boasts of Towns and Battles he has won,
And rattles of the mighty Deeds h'as done,
To serve his King and Country, and secure
Our dear Religion from the Romish Pow'r;
If Truth be canvas'd, Int'rest leads the Van,
And makes the Soldier such a valiant Man;
Where he's best us'd he thinks the Cause most right,
'Tis Pay and hopes of Plunder makes him fight;
And when the first of these Temptations fails,
Tho' in God's Cause, whole Legions turn their Tails,
Forget their Honour which was once their Pride,
And fly for Succour to the adverse side:
So the proud Statesman, if he once has shown
Some signal Service to a thankless Throne,
Finding his Prince forgetful to requite,
In haste turns Rebel to revenge the Slight.
Whose Sword's his Voucher, and his Pride his Scars,
Who dreads Dishonour more than sudden Fate,
And is by Blood and Wounds made desperate;
Who boasts of Towns and Battles he has won,
And rattles of the mighty Deeds h'as done,
To serve his King and Country, and secure
Our dear Religion from the Romish Pow'r;
If Truth be canvas'd, Int'rest leads the Van,
And makes the Soldier such a valiant Man;
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'Tis Pay and hopes of Plunder makes him fight;
And when the first of these Temptations fails,
Tho' in God's Cause, whole Legions turn their Tails,
Forget their Honour which was once their Pride,
And fly for Succour to the adverse side:
So the proud Statesman, if he once has shown
Some signal Service to a thankless Throne,
Finding his Prince forgetful to requite,
In haste turns Rebel to revenge the Slight.
War is the Sport of Kings and mighty Lords,
The Key that opens all the Nation's Hoards,
And those in Arms that in the Project joyn,
Fight not for Country, but their Country's Coin;
'Tis hopes of Wealth that warms the Hero's Veins,
In long cold Marches, and in wet Campaigns;
'Tis the rich Plunder that's within the Town,
That makes th'Assailants go so bravely on,
And not Religion, that's but a Pretence
To make God's Lambs part freely with their Pence;
For those that wade thro' Bloody Fields maintain,
They fight for Pay, and what they more can gain,
Or else the Priests might draw Religion's Sword,
And fight themselves the Battle of the Lord;
Or lasie Burghers leave their handsome Wives,
And to secure their Wealth expose their Lives:
Few are of ease so Prodigal and Vain,
To bear another's Burthen, but for Gain,
And were it not for Pay, few Soldiers would be slain.
The Key that opens all the Nation's Hoards,
And those in Arms that in the Project joyn,
Fight not for Country, but their Country's Coin;
'Tis hopes of Wealth that warms the Hero's Veins,
In long cold Marches, and in wet Campaigns;
'Tis the rich Plunder that's within the Town,
That makes th'Assailants go so bravely on,
And not Religion, that's but a Pretence
To make God's Lambs part freely with their Pence;
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They fight for Pay, and what they more can gain,
Or else the Priests might draw Religion's Sword,
And fight themselves the Battle of the Lord;
Or lasie Burghers leave their handsome Wives,
And to secure their Wealth expose their Lives:
Few are of ease so Prodigal and Vain,
To bear another's Burthen, but for Gain,
And were it not for Pay, few Soldiers would be slain.
Money! it is by thy prevailing Aid,
Callow-chin'd Boys are Noble Captains made;
Much fitter to attend a Lady's Train
Than strut before a Warlike Troop of Men,
Whose braver Hearts despise the Tender Chit,
To whom they're hardly destin'd to submit;
Whilst Men well skill'd in Arms, who long have serv'd,
Want those Advancements they have well deserv'd,
And unregarded at a distance stand,
Cringing to those they rather should command.
Thus Gold in Armies often rules the Roast,
And lifts the Coward to the Brave Man's Post.
Callow-chin'd Boys are Noble Captains made;
Much fitter to attend a Lady's Train
Than strut before a Warlike Troop of Men,
Whose braver Hearts despise the Tender Chit,
To whom they're hardly destin'd to submit;
Whilst Men well skill'd in Arms, who long have serv'd,
Want those Advancements they have well deserv'd,
And unregarded at a distance stand,
Cringing to those they rather should command.
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And lifts the Coward to the Brave Man's Post.
Marriage that should a Sanction give to Love,
That State which many try, but few approve,
By Money now's so mercenary made,
Like Priests, both Sexes use it as a Trade:
With th'Old, the Ugly, Peevish, or Deform'd,
If beautify'd with Wealth, our Hearts are charm'd;
For Fortunes much superiour to our own,
Are now the only Gifts we dote upon;
We ask not how Discreet, how Young, how Fair,
How Chast or Vertuous, but how Rich they are?
Beauty's kind Charms, as worthless Toys we slight,
Because Experience proves Love's soft Delight,
Blesses but some dark Moments of the Night.
Riches, that welcome Jewel with a Bride,
Beauty outshines, and ev'ry Grace beside;
For most Men think, the Fortune, not the Wife,
Is all th'Advantage Wedlock adds to Life,
In this loose Age few love so well to wed
Alone for th'Blessings of the Marriage Bed:
Great Men themselves their Honour bow to Gold,
And joyn their Noble Blood t'ignoble Mould;
The Grasier's Heiress, with her Father's Hoard,
Is now a welcome Lady to my Lord:
The Daughter of a Cit grown Rich by Trade,
May match at Court, and be a Dutchess made:
Honour's a Trifle, Vertue but a Dream,
Riches alone procures the World's Esteem:
Beauty's more fit to bless a Monarch's Bed,
Daily for Wealth with fumbling Dotage wed;
The Gallant Youth, the Humpback'd Lady takes,
And for her Gold a flatt'ring Husband makes,
Fawns on his Female Chaos like a Slave,
And hugs the Lump he wishes in the Grave;
What she desires he liberally grants,
Relieves her Lust, and she supplies his Wants.
The Charming Maid as Fortuneless as he,
As gladly joyns with Rich Deformity,
Prostrates her Charms to some Babboon she hates,
And hugs the Clog her Soul abominates;
Bears all his Jealous Taunts he cannot hide,
To be a rich decrepid Miser's Bride:
Thus Beauties oft comply for filthy Gain,
To marry Elves, and cross the lovely Strain;
Producing what the World abhor to see,
A crooked, half-got, peevish Progeny.
That State which many try, but few approve,
By Money now's so mercenary made,
Like Priests, both Sexes use it as a Trade:
With th'Old, the Ugly, Peevish, or Deform'd,
If beautify'd with Wealth, our Hearts are charm'd;
For Fortunes much superiour to our own,
Are now the only Gifts we dote upon;
We ask not how Discreet, how Young, how Fair,
How Chast or Vertuous, but how Rich they are?
Beauty's kind Charms, as worthless Toys we slight,
Because Experience proves Love's soft Delight,
Blesses but some dark Moments of the Night.
Riches, that welcome Jewel with a Bride,
Beauty outshines, and ev'ry Grace beside;
For most Men think, the Fortune, not the Wife,
Is all th'Advantage Wedlock adds to Life,
330
Alone for th'Blessings of the Marriage Bed:
Great Men themselves their Honour bow to Gold,
And joyn their Noble Blood t'ignoble Mould;
The Grasier's Heiress, with her Father's Hoard,
Is now a welcome Lady to my Lord:
The Daughter of a Cit grown Rich by Trade,
May match at Court, and be a Dutchess made:
Honour's a Trifle, Vertue but a Dream,
Riches alone procures the World's Esteem:
Beauty's more fit to bless a Monarch's Bed,
Daily for Wealth with fumbling Dotage wed;
The Gallant Youth, the Humpback'd Lady takes,
And for her Gold a flatt'ring Husband makes,
Fawns on his Female Chaos like a Slave,
And hugs the Lump he wishes in the Grave;
What she desires he liberally grants,
Relieves her Lust, and she supplies his Wants.
The Charming Maid as Fortuneless as he,
As gladly joyns with Rich Deformity,
Prostrates her Charms to some Babboon she hates,
And hugs the Clog her Soul abominates;
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To be a rich decrepid Miser's Bride:
Thus Beauties oft comply for filthy Gain,
To marry Elves, and cross the lovely Strain;
Producing what the World abhor to see,
A crooked, half-got, peevish Progeny.
Vertue, of which some squeamish Beauties boast,
Proud of that nescio quid by others lost;
The force of all Love's Batteries may endure,
And stand behind Bellona's Shield secure,
Till Gold, the mighty Conquerour that subdues
Ladies in Cloisters well as those in Stews,
Attacks the Virgin in a pow'rful Summ,
And then she soon submits to be o'recome:
Loves the dear Man who with full Bags assails,
And by such kind and pleasing Means prevails;
Thus the proud Fair One, who has oft been try'd,
And courted by her Equals for a Bride,
Is often found too Cunning, or too Coy,
The Bliss of Love to lawfully enjoy,
Because her Hopes, which Youth and Beauty starves,
Aspire to what her Fortune not deserves;
Yet for the sake of Gold and Liberty,
She shall at last be tempted to be free,
With Gouty, old infirm Nobility:
Thus Womans Vertue is no more than Pride,
Which only can by Gold be gratify'd.
Proud of that nescio quid by others lost;
The force of all Love's Batteries may endure,
And stand behind Bellona's Shield secure,
Till Gold, the mighty Conquerour that subdues
Ladies in Cloisters well as those in Stews,
Attacks the Virgin in a pow'rful Summ,
And then she soon submits to be o'recome:
Loves the dear Man who with full Bags assails,
And by such kind and pleasing Means prevails;
Thus the proud Fair One, who has oft been try'd,
And courted by her Equals for a Bride,
Is often found too Cunning, or too Coy,
The Bliss of Love to lawfully enjoy,
332
Aspire to what her Fortune not deserves;
Yet for the sake of Gold and Liberty,
She shall at last be tempted to be free,
With Gouty, old infirm Nobility:
Thus Womans Vertue is no more than Pride,
Which only can by Gold be gratify'd.
Money's the base betrayer of Mankind,
It numbs our Senses, makes our Reason blind,
Tempts us to hide those Ills we should declare,
And oft to speak what's Prudence to forbear;
Nay, makes us warmly labour to deceive
Others with what we don't our selves believe,
And in more weak Societies maintain
False Contradictions 'gainst the Truth that's plain;
Where we Dependance or an Int'rest have,
With honest Characters we hide the Knave;
And without cause, to serve our Purpose stain,
The Reputations of deserving Men:
This Man we flatter, t'other we abuse,
The Guiltless blame, the Guilty oft excuse:
Thus from all Truth and Honesty dissent,
To make our own Advantage crown th'Event,
Hide our own Knowledge to mislead the Blind,
When Mercenary Gain corrupts the Mind.
It numbs our Senses, makes our Reason blind,
Tempts us to hide those Ills we should declare,
And oft to speak what's Prudence to forbear;
Nay, makes us warmly labour to deceive
Others with what we don't our selves believe,
And in more weak Societies maintain
False Contradictions 'gainst the Truth that's plain;
Where we Dependance or an Int'rest have,
With honest Characters we hide the Knave;
And without cause, to serve our Purpose stain,
The Reputations of deserving Men:
333
The Guiltless blame, the Guilty oft excuse:
Thus from all Truth and Honesty dissent,
To make our own Advantage crown th'Event,
Hide our own Knowledge to mislead the Blind,
When Mercenary Gain corrupts the Mind.
In Friendship we unite for Int'rest sake,
And when that fails, the feeble Chain we break;
Advantage ties the profitable Knot,
For nothing binds where nothing's to be got:
Our Friend we sooth, we flatter and caress,
And in kind words our utmost Love express,
Whilst he appears as we our selves desire,
Blest with full Pockets, cloath'd in spruce Attire;
But if once Poor by fatal Chance he's grown,
Thredbare his Garment and his Money flown,
We dread the Mortal knocking at our Door,
And shun the Wretch we so esteem'd before.
So the kept Mistress, when her Spark grows Poor,
The Contract breaks, and vows she'll sin no more;
Thus from the ruin'd Fool withdraws her Charms,
To win new Cullies to her Lustful Arms.
And when that fails, the feeble Chain we break;
Advantage ties the profitable Knot,
For nothing binds where nothing's to be got:
Our Friend we sooth, we flatter and caress,
And in kind words our utmost Love express,
Whilst he appears as we our selves desire,
Blest with full Pockets, cloath'd in spruce Attire;
But if once Poor by fatal Chance he's grown,
Thredbare his Garment and his Money flown,
We dread the Mortal knocking at our Door,
And shun the Wretch we so esteem'd before.
So the kept Mistress, when her Spark grows Poor,
The Contract breaks, and vows she'll sin no more;
334
To win new Cullies to her Lustful Arms.
Money! what Evils can on Earth be done,
But by thy Aid are finish'd or begun?
No Villany superlatively great,
Can be without thy Cursed Aid compleat:
Transcending Ills much Management require,
No Traytor can with wish'd Success conspire,
Without such needy Slaves that play the Rogue for Hire.
Money, that Rebel, perfects the Design,
For Kings are ne'er undone but by their Coin.
But by thy Aid are finish'd or begun?
No Villany superlatively great,
Can be without thy Cursed Aid compleat:
Transcending Ills much Management require,
No Traytor can with wish'd Success conspire,
Without such needy Slaves that play the Rogue for Hire.
Money, that Rebel, perfects the Design,
For Kings are ne'er undone but by their Coin.
'Twas Money tempted Judas to betray;
'Tis the false Guide that leads us all astray,
It makes the Priest grow negligent and proud,
Who damns for Evil what he holds for Good.
It bears in ev'ry Princes Court such sway,
The Poor can't worship Mammon more than they:
Minions for Gold will falsifie their Trust,
And L---ds turn Panders to their Sov'reign's Lust;
Vertue surrender at the first attack,
Prevailing Gold soon flings her on her Back,
Tempts Youth and Beauty to exert her Charms,
And hug the Lustful Donor in her Arms;
No Age or Sex its Conqu'ring Pow'r withstands,
It guides the Lawyer's Tongue and Soldier's Hands,
And those that govern Kingdoms Sov'reign Gold commands.
'Tis the false Guide that leads us all astray,
It makes the Priest grow negligent and proud,
Who damns for Evil what he holds for Good.
It bears in ev'ry Princes Court such sway,
The Poor can't worship Mammon more than they:
Minions for Gold will falsifie their Trust,
And L---ds turn Panders to their Sov'reign's Lust;
335
Prevailing Gold soon flings her on her Back,
Tempts Youth and Beauty to exert her Charms,
And hug the Lustful Donor in her Arms;
No Age or Sex its Conqu'ring Pow'r withstands,
It guides the Lawyer's Tongue and Soldier's Hands,
And those that govern Kingdoms Sov'reign Gold commands.
336
A DIALOGUE, In Time of Peace, between Britania and Prudence.
Britania.
How calm my Empire, how serene my Breast,
My self in safety and my People blest,
My Coast well guarded, and my Neighbours aw'd,
Belov'd at home, admir'd and fear'd abroad.
O happy Nation, rich and fertile Land,
What Pow'r can thy united Force withstand,
What neighb'ring Kingdom durst thy Bounds invade,
Provoke thy Arms, or rival thee in Trade.
My self in safety and my People blest,
My Coast well guarded, and my Neighbours aw'd,
Belov'd at home, admir'd and fear'd abroad.
O happy Nation, rich and fertile Land,
What Pow'r can thy united Force withstand,
What neighb'ring Kingdom durst thy Bounds invade,
Provoke thy Arms, or rival thee in Trade.
337
'Tis true, Great Madam, you command a Crown,
That fears no Foreign Force or Prince's Frown:
Yet 'tis not wise in those that Rule a State,
To think themselves too safe, tho' ne'er so Great,
Such Thoughts disarm you both of Care and Pow'r,
And leave the proudest Empires insecure.
That fears no Foreign Force or Prince's Frown:
Yet 'tis not wise in those that Rule a State,
To think themselves too safe, tho' ne'er so Great,
Such Thoughts disarm you both of Care and Pow'r,
And leave the proudest Empires insecure.
Britania.
Prudence with Royal Patience should be heard,
But now, methinks, you speak as if you fear'd.
'Tis true, this Maxim ought to be carest,
Provide against the worst, and hope the best;
But sure in Peace we may for ease retire,
And slight that Care more dang'rous Times require.
But now, methinks, you speak as if you fear'd.
'Tis true, this Maxim ought to be carest,
Provide against the worst, and hope the best;
But sure in Peace we may for ease retire,
And slight that Care more dang'rous Times require.
Prudence.
Troubles unseen, and dangers tho' unknown,
Are always hov'ring round a Monarch's Throne,
Which if not strictly watch'd may be surpriz'd,
And in one Moment's time be sacrific'd.
Are always hov'ring round a Monarch's Throne,
Which if not strictly watch'd may be surpriz'd,
And in one Moment's time be sacrific'd.
338
No Foreign Arms can Britains welfare touch,
But must give warning of their near approach,
Our Floating Bulwarks guard around our Coast,
By them the Empire of the Seas I boast.
And who at home would be so madly rude,
T'offend a Queen whose Vertues mean their good.
But must give warning of their near approach,
Our Floating Bulwarks guard around our Coast,
By them the Empire of the Seas I boast.
And who at home would be so madly rude,
T'offend a Queen whose Vertues mean their good.
Prudence.
Vertues, alas, are but a slender Guard,
Which meet with small Esteem, and less Reward,
Conduct and Pow'r should never sleep in ease;
'Tis Strength and Policy in War or Peace,
That are the wisest Monarch's best defence,
'Gainst foreign Force or homebred Insolence.
These only can secure the Royal Place,
Whilst Pride and Envy reign in humane Race.
Which meet with small Esteem, and less Reward,
Conduct and Pow'r should never sleep in ease;
'Tis Strength and Policy in War or Peace,
That are the wisest Monarch's best defence,
'Gainst foreign Force or homebred Insolence.
These only can secure the Royal Place,
Whilst Pride and Envy reign in humane Race.
Britania.
The Cautions that you give are safe and good,
But more restraining than methinks they shou'd;
For such strict watchfulness as you prefer,
Makes sov'reign Pow'r too servile by its Care.
From Ills abroad our Shipping are our Guard,
And Ills at home are needless to be fear'd:
For old Experience does our Isle convince,
The Subjects Safety's to obey their Prince.
If they transgress to interupt our Ease,
They call down Vengeance on their Families:
Expose themselves in a Rebellious Cause,
To Heaven's Wrath, as well as humane Laws;
And surely open, when they disagree,
A thousand Doors to their own Misery.
But more restraining than methinks they shou'd;
339
Makes sov'reign Pow'r too servile by its Care.
From Ills abroad our Shipping are our Guard,
And Ills at home are needless to be fear'd:
For old Experience does our Isle convince,
The Subjects Safety's to obey their Prince.
If they transgress to interupt our Ease,
They call down Vengeance on their Families:
Expose themselves in a Rebellious Cause,
To Heaven's Wrath, as well as humane Laws;
And surely open, when they disagree,
A thousand Doors to their own Misery.
Prudence.
But Crowds with dazl'd Eyes behold your State,
And squint with double Envy at the Great;
To their weak Sight things crooked oft appear,
Your brightness and their distance makes them err.
Strait Objects often seem to them awry.
As Sticks in Water set deceive the Eye;
Therefore tho' ne'er so Vertuous, Good, and Just,
In th'execution of your sov'reign Trust,
Yet Stratagem must still preserve Esteem,
If you'd with Ease sustain the Diadem:
No Love or Danger must your Breast devide,
But certain Rules must be your safest Guide.
Some things must never be expos'd to Light,
But thro' such Glasses that deceive the Sight,
Such that by Art will make the Object grow,
And magnifie those Trifles that you show.
Others too monstrous for the Subjects Eyes,
Must be reduc'd to a proportion'd size,
And so expos'd, that what before would fright,
May now be view'd with candour and delight.
Some things in dark obscurity must sleep,
And never from behind the Curtain peep;
Or ever be beheld, except by those
Whose Int'rest 'tis to keep the Secret close.
And squint with double Envy at the Great;
To their weak Sight things crooked oft appear,
Your brightness and their distance makes them err.
Strait Objects often seem to them awry.
As Sticks in Water set deceive the Eye;
Therefore tho' ne'er so Vertuous, Good, and Just,
In th'execution of your sov'reign Trust,
340
If you'd with Ease sustain the Diadem:
No Love or Danger must your Breast devide,
But certain Rules must be your safest Guide.
Some things must never be expos'd to Light,
But thro' such Glasses that deceive the Sight,
Such that by Art will make the Object grow,
And magnifie those Trifles that you show.
Others too monstrous for the Subjects Eyes,
Must be reduc'd to a proportion'd size,
And so expos'd, that what before would fright,
May now be view'd with candour and delight.
Some things in dark obscurity must sleep,
And never from behind the Curtain peep;
Or ever be beheld, except by those
Whose Int'rest 'tis to keep the Secret close.
Britania.
Th'advice you give me I must needs approve,
But who can conquer Prejudice or Love.
'Tis hard that Princes, who their Subjects sway,
Should be confin'd to narr'wer Rules than they,
Who, without dread, their Appetites pursue,
And where they place their Love their Favors shew.
Let loose their Envy, or express their Hate,
And when reproach'd, aloud recriminate.
Enjoy those Freedoms which a Scepter make
Ignoble, for a Sov'reign Prince to take.
But who can conquer Prejudice or Love.
'Tis hard that Princes, who their Subjects sway,
Should be confin'd to narr'wer Rules than they,
341
And where they place their Love their Favors shew.
Let loose their Envy, or express their Hate,
And when reproach'd, aloud recriminate.
Enjoy those Freedoms which a Scepter make
Ignoble, for a Sov'reign Prince to take.
Prudence.
Wise Princes no Perfections should admire,
But what the weight of Government require;
No other Graces worth your notice find,
In Fav'rites, but the Vertues of the Mind.
Chuse not a Statesman for his lovely Shape,
But Wisdom, tho' as ugly as an Ape.
Advance no Man for his engaging Mein,
Except, tho' gay without, he's sage within.
Learn to distinguish first, then stop your Ears,
'Gainst treacherous Sycophants and Flatterers.
Let no aspiring Party's subtil Wiles,
Remove true Merit from your gracious Smiles;
For Princes that with such Intrigues comply,
Force all the Wheels of Government awry.
Cherish no Factious Leaders in your Court,
For, Nettle-like, if stroak'd, they'll do you hurt,
And by ill Projects hatch'd behind the Skreen,
Shipwreck the Throne on Shelves to you unseen.
Let no Affection or Resentment make,
Your steady Heart the Rules of Justice break,
But still reward where Merit does appear,
And punish Ills in spight of Love or Fear.
But what the weight of Government require;
No other Graces worth your notice find,
In Fav'rites, but the Vertues of the Mind.
Chuse not a Statesman for his lovely Shape,
But Wisdom, tho' as ugly as an Ape.
Advance no Man for his engaging Mein,
Except, tho' gay without, he's sage within.
Learn to distinguish first, then stop your Ears,
'Gainst treacherous Sycophants and Flatterers.
Let no aspiring Party's subtil Wiles,
Remove true Merit from your gracious Smiles;
For Princes that with such Intrigues comply,
Force all the Wheels of Government awry.
342
For, Nettle-like, if stroak'd, they'll do you hurt,
And by ill Projects hatch'd behind the Skreen,
Shipwreck the Throne on Shelves to you unseen.
Let no Affection or Resentment make,
Your steady Heart the Rules of Justice break,
But still reward where Merit does appear,
And punish Ills in spight of Love or Fear.
343
A PROLOGUE Spoken by Mr. Pinkeman, suppos'd to be Press'd, and haul'd in before the Curtain, by a couple of Press-Constables.
Well, Master Constable, I must, you say,
Go kill French Cowards for a Groat a day;
But why such rugged Violence as this,
D'you break Mens Noddles to preserve the Peace?
Truly, rough Sirs, I cannot think 'tis fair,
To turn pacifick Staves to Clubs of War:
'Tis true, you've made me by Experience know,
Pow'r, when provok'd, can give a Deadly Blow.
Go kill French Cowards for a Groat a day;
But why such rugged Violence as this,
D'you break Mens Noddles to preserve the Peace?
Truly, rough Sirs, I cannot think 'tis fair,
To turn pacifick Staves to Clubs of War:
'Tis true, you've made me by Experience know,
Pow'r, when provok'd, can give a Deadly Blow.
I'm Press'd, you say but I believe Oppress'd,
Yet wrongs like these are hard to be Redress'd;
And the first speedy End proves always best.
The readiest way's to Bribe off my Restraint,
Here Gentlemen, I know what 'tis you want.
[The Constables take the Money and go off.
Yet wrongs like these are hard to be Redress'd;
And the first speedy End proves always best.
344
Here Gentlemen, I know what 'tis you want.
Your Servant, Sirs, by this the World may see,
How Scoundrel Knaves abuse Authority;
Chose into Pow'r from Garrets, Bulks and Stalls,
Advanc'd to Staves, from Thimbles and from Auls;
From vamping Shoes, and mending Knitty Jackets.
To cheat the Crown, and pick the Subjects Pockets.
How Scoundrel Knaves abuse Authority;
Chose into Pow'r from Garrets, Bulks and Stalls,
Advanc'd to Staves, from Thimbles and from Auls;
From vamping Shoes, and mending Knitty Jackets.
To cheat the Crown, and pick the Subjects Pockets.
The Weak they haul to Arms, because they're poor,
Unfit by Nature for the Toils of War;
But quit, for Bribes, the hardy and the strong,
Protect themselves, and do their Betters wrong:
Surprize the Fearful, squeeze them till they bleed,
And when their Palms are daub'd the Vagrant's freed.
Whilst more Industrious Men supply their room,
Whose hands would prove more useful here at Home.
Thus by ill usage many Feuds create,
Oppress the People, and deceive the State.
Unfit by Nature for the Toils of War;
But quit, for Bribes, the hardy and the strong,
Protect themselves, and do their Betters wrong:
Surprize the Fearful, squeeze them till they bleed,
And when their Palms are daub'd the Vagrant's freed.
Whilst more Industrious Men supply their room,
Whose hands would prove more useful here at Home.
345
Oppress the People, and deceive the State.
As for my part, I am unskill'd in Jars,
And hate the Tragick Scenes of Bloody Wars;
You Gentlemen, who wait to see our Play,
All know my Talent lies another way.
I make a Soldier for the Queen! Adsheart,
One Clap of Train-Band Thunder makes me start:
I'd fain be reconcil'd to Death but can't,
The very thoughts of Fighting makes me faint.
Not, but I know it is of great Renown,
To serve one's Native Country or the Crown;
Besides with Rural Damsels, I confess,
A Scarlet Coat is a most Glorious Dress.
The very Colour dazzles Female Eyes,
And takes the Heart, unguarded, by surprize;
You who with Honour wear it, often find
It makes the Bashful Country Maid prove kind:
Who could perhaps before resist Loves Pow'r,
And keep her Heart in all Attacks secure.
Laugh at her Lovers Sighs, despise his Tears,
But Venus must submit, when Mars appears.
And hate the Tragick Scenes of Bloody Wars;
You Gentlemen, who wait to see our Play,
All know my Talent lies another way.
I make a Soldier for the Queen! Adsheart,
One Clap of Train-Band Thunder makes me start:
I'd fain be reconcil'd to Death but can't,
The very thoughts of Fighting makes me faint.
Not, but I know it is of great Renown,
To serve one's Native Country or the Crown;
Besides with Rural Damsels, I confess,
A Scarlet Coat is a most Glorious Dress.
The very Colour dazzles Female Eyes,
And takes the Heart, unguarded, by surprize;
You who with Honour wear it, often find
It makes the Bashful Country Maid prove kind:
Who could perhaps before resist Loves Pow'r,
And keep her Heart in all Attacks secure.
346
But Venus must submit, when Mars appears.
Faith, now I think on't, I can tell you how
The State might quickly raise Brave Men enow;
Would they but find some gentle means to Press,
Those Charming Ladies who our Audience Grace.
Should such bright Stars in the next Camp appear,
You Generous Gentlemen assembled here,
Would need no Press, but all run Voluntier.
The State might quickly raise Brave Men enow;
Would they but find some gentle means to Press,
Those Charming Ladies who our Audience Grace.
Should such bright Stars in the next Camp appear,
You Generous Gentlemen assembled here,
Would need no Press, but all run Voluntier.
Such Beautious Troops new Wonders would afford,
And vanquish with their Charms, beyond the Sword;
You only (Ladies) so Divinely Bright,
Who Wound with Mercy, Conquer with Delight.
Can the vast Glories won at Hockstedt blast,
More Captives take, subdue with greater hast,
And with your Eyes gain mightier Vict'ries than our last.
And vanquish with their Charms, beyond the Sword;
You only (Ladies) so Divinely Bright,
Who Wound with Mercy, Conquer with Delight.
Can the vast Glories won at Hockstedt blast,
More Captives take, subdue with greater hast,
And with your Eyes gain mightier Vict'ries than our last.
347
AN EPILOGUE, Spoken by Mr. Pinkeman, upon the Back of an Elephant.
Since
France with Fooll'ries has debauch'd our Nation,
And Foreign Gimcracks only are in Fashion,
I oft have study'd 'till my Brains grew dizzy,
To find out somthing that I thought wou'd please ye.
At last resolv'd to make a Trip to Guinea,
To buy this Nimble Pad to Entertain ye,
And if you're not pleas'd now, the Devil's in you.
Do but behold his Comely Looks and Graces,
'Tis a strange Tit, he neither Trots or Paces.
Observe his lovely Shapes from Head to Foot,
His sturdy Rump, his Oliverian Snout.
So plump the Buttocks of the brawny Slouch,
That no European Beast can boast of such,
Except some Monster found amongst the D---h.
His Guts, I dare engage, would hold more Forces'
Stow'd close, than half a dozen Trojan Horses.
Yet, notwithstanding his Batavian bulk
In Battle he disdains to run or Skulk;
But has, upon my Word, that Courage in him,
He'll fight like any English Fool, I've seen him,
Gee Dobbin, how the Lazy Lubbard stirs,
[Spurs him.
And Foreign Gimcracks only are in Fashion,
I oft have study'd 'till my Brains grew dizzy,
To find out somthing that I thought wou'd please ye.
At last resolv'd to make a Trip to Guinea,
To buy this Nimble Pad to Entertain ye,
And if you're not pleas'd now, the Devil's in you.
Do but behold his Comely Looks and Graces,
'Tis a strange Tit, he neither Trots or Paces.
Observe his lovely Shapes from Head to Foot,
His sturdy Rump, his Oliverian Snout.
348
That no European Beast can boast of such,
Except some Monster found amongst the D---h.
His Guts, I dare engage, would hold more Forces'
Stow'd close, than half a dozen Trojan Horses.
Yet, notwithstanding his Batavian bulk
In Battle he disdains to run or Skulk;
But has, upon my Word, that Courage in him,
He'll fight like any English Fool, I've seen him,
Gee Dobbin, how the Lazy Lubbard stirs,
I find the stubborn Jade disdains my Spurs.
Does he prepare for speed and Cock his Tail up,
'Egad I'd give a Groat to see him Gallup:
[Whips him.
Does he prepare for speed and Cock his Tail up,
'Egad I'd give a Groat to see him Gallup:
But Spaniard-like I find his Sullen Pride,
Will not be forc'd beyond his nat'ral stride;
But when provok'd to move against his Will,
Ass-like he stands in spight of Beating still.
Will not be forc'd beyond his nat'ral stride;
But when provok'd to move against his Will,
Ass-like he stands in spight of Beating still.
I ran a Dev'lish Risque to bring him o'er,
Adsheart I bought him just at Hell's Back Door;
And, as a means to better recommend him,
Have brought these Devils over to attend him,
Hoping my Tit and I, with our Vagaries,
May please like some new Prodigy from Paris,
Who doffs his wooden Shoes, and in a trice
Becomes the wonder of our Ears or Eyes:
Let him but Play or Dance a new Sebel,
Besure 'tis mighty fine, 'tis wondrous well;
What e'er he does 'tis our kind English Nature,
To cry, the Foreign Fool's a Charming Creature,
Whilst Artists of our own, who far exceed,
Can no Applause obtain, or Merit plead;
Therefore I rode about, the Lord knows whither,
Turn'd Jockey, and have brought this Pad-nag hither:
He's fine and smooth, the Rogue's in pure good Case,
'Twould make you laugh to see him run a Race:
Oh! how he'd puff and blow, fret, sweat, and waddle,
No Sow is better built to wear a Saddle:
See how he Runs, tho' I Confess indeed,
[Cherups to him.
Adsheart I bought him just at Hell's Back Door;
349
Have brought these Devils over to attend him,
Hoping my Tit and I, with our Vagaries,
May please like some new Prodigy from Paris,
Who doffs his wooden Shoes, and in a trice
Becomes the wonder of our Ears or Eyes:
Let him but Play or Dance a new Sebel,
Besure 'tis mighty fine, 'tis wondrous well;
What e'er he does 'tis our kind English Nature,
To cry, the Foreign Fool's a Charming Creature,
Whilst Artists of our own, who far exceed,
Can no Applause obtain, or Merit plead;
Therefore I rode about, the Lord knows whither,
Turn'd Jockey, and have brought this Pad-nag hither:
He's fine and smooth, the Rogue's in pure good Case,
'Twould make you laugh to see him run a Race:
Oh! how he'd puff and blow, fret, sweat, and waddle,
No Sow is better built to wear a Saddle:
350
I did not buy him barely for his speed.
But for the Beast to play a Commick part
In a dull Age ungrateful to Desert,
When foreign Monsters please much more than Men of Art.
But for the Beast to play a Commick part
In a dull Age ungrateful to Desert,
When foreign Monsters please much more than Men of Art.
351
A SONG.
[The Beauties of the flowry Spring]
I
The Beauties of the flowry Spring,When gilded with the Sun,
The Trees that bloom and Birds that sing,
Are far by you outdone.
Your lovely Charms, which all admire,
Prove other Blessings Toys;
And when you Sing, the feather'd Quire
Sit list'ning to your Voice.
II
In you the Gods their Glory show,Your Beams the World revive.
Angels no greater Bliss can know,
Than you have pow'r to give.
Shou'd Atheists gaze but on your Face,
They in your Charms might view,
And be convinc'd in e'ry Grace,
There is a Heav'n in you.
352
A SONG.
[Had poor Narcissus once but seen]
I
Had poor Narcissus once but seenThose Charms which I with pleasure view,
No self-admirer had he been,
But must have sigh'd and pin'd for you.
II
No Ease or Comfort can I find,When to Severity you're prone.
I'm only living when you're kind,
But dying when I see you frown.
382
A MAD-SONG.
Cou'd I but climb to yonder Star,
I'd stop bright Cinthia's swift carier,
With Angry force I'd smite the Sun,
And spoil the Day from coming on.
I'd stop bright Cinthia's swift carier,
With Angry force I'd smite the Sun,
And spoil the Day from coming on.
Yonder she dwells, I see her Drowsy Eyes
Twinkle and rowl about the azure Skies.
Cupid thy Wings, good Boy, I'll range about,
And soar to Heav'n but find the Angel out.
Twinkle and rowl about the azure Skies.
Cupid thy Wings, good Boy, I'll range about,
And soar to Heav'n but find the Angel out.
Ah! Mopsy art thou come again,
To shew thy Charming Feature!
Why dost thou look so pale and Wan,
That was so fine a Creature.
To shew thy Charming Feature!
Why dost thou look so pale and Wan,
That was so fine a Creature.
383
See how she flies away again,
And Mocks me with her Laughter.
Furies, I say, let go my Chain,
That I may follow after.
And Mocks me with her Laughter.
Furies, I say, let go my Chain,
That I may follow after.
Come all ye Jack of Lanthorns, come,
Let's Travel where content is,
Light me to my Eternal home,
Or find me out my Senses,
Let's Travel where content is,
Light me to my Eternal home,
Or find me out my Senses,
The Chariot o'th' Sun for Expedition I'll seize,
And drive it where ever my Fancy directs me.
To Heav'n I'll travel, there Rule as I please
And punish the Quarrelsome Gods if they vex me.
And drive it where ever my Fancy directs me.
To Heav'n I'll travel, there Rule as I please
And punish the Quarrelsome Gods if they vex me.
FINIS.
| Poems on divers subjects | |