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6
The Character of a Vintner.
Ye Sons of Sodom, perverse hellish Race,
Behold the ugly Features of your Face,
And set this Picture up in every Room,
To see your Sin, and your eternal Doom.
It puzzles some, but never puzzl'd me,
What was the Fruit on the Forbidden Tree:
Divines have laid it out in different Shapes,
But I maintain it was a Bunch of Grapes,
With which the Devil fuddled the first Madam,
And drunken Dame she did the same to Adam;
So Drinking was the Crime procur'd the Fall,
Runs in a Blood, for drinking damns us all.
Behold the ugly Features of your Face,
And set this Picture up in every Room,
To see your Sin, and your eternal Doom.
It puzzles some, but never puzzl'd me,
What was the Fruit on the Forbidden Tree:
Divines have laid it out in different Shapes,
But I maintain it was a Bunch of Grapes,
With which the Devil fuddled the first Madam,
And drunken Dame she did the same to Adam;
So Drinking was the Crime procur'd the Fall,
Runs in a Blood, for drinking damns us all.
The Patriarch Noah grew a Vintner too,
Drunk Claret Wine till he began to spew,
So Water drown'd th'old World, and Claret drown'd the New.
What makes the Alcorn's Doctrine so prevail,
An undigested and a clumsy Tale?
Why, it prohibits Vintners and the Wine,
So Piety in ev'ry Turk doth shine,
Tho' the Alcorn's gross, and never had Pretence,
For to beguile a Man of common Sense.
What makes the true Religion we embrace,
Splinter'd in Factions, to our deep Disgrace?
What tarnishes that Creed, was once our Glory?
What made Distinctions 'twixt the Whig and Tory?
Why, they were hatch'd by drinking at the Inn.
A Vintner's Antichrist, the very Man of Sin,
From whence comes Murders, Oaths, and Disolation,
And all the Plagues e'er sunk a sinful Nation?
What makes the Rake, the Gamster, and the Whore?
What makes our ancient Families so poor?
What peoples Hell, and makes an Heaven thin?
'Tis Midnight Drinking, that's the damned Sin.
Ere Drinking had our Constitution broke,
And Men, like Goats, did simple on the Rock,
Men did outlive the Eagle and the Oak,
No Druggist's Mortar toll'd the fun'ral Bell,
No Macer's Lungs did bawl the Rolls of Hell,
Nor did the Butchers mangle down the Beast,
Nor yet deluded by designing Priest,
But when the Vintner did hang out his Sign,
The World grew sunk in Vice and Claret Wine.
Drunk Claret Wine till he began to spew,
So Water drown'd th'old World, and Claret drown'd the New.
What makes the Alcorn's Doctrine so prevail,
An undigested and a clumsy Tale?
Why, it prohibits Vintners and the Wine,
So Piety in ev'ry Turk doth shine,
Tho' the Alcorn's gross, and never had Pretence,
For to beguile a Man of common Sense.
What makes the true Religion we embrace,
Splinter'd in Factions, to our deep Disgrace?
What tarnishes that Creed, was once our Glory?
7
Why, they were hatch'd by drinking at the Inn.
A Vintner's Antichrist, the very Man of Sin,
From whence comes Murders, Oaths, and Disolation,
And all the Plagues e'er sunk a sinful Nation?
What makes the Rake, the Gamster, and the Whore?
What makes our ancient Families so poor?
What peoples Hell, and makes an Heaven thin?
'Tis Midnight Drinking, that's the damned Sin.
Ere Drinking had our Constitution broke,
And Men, like Goats, did simple on the Rock,
Men did outlive the Eagle and the Oak,
No Druggist's Mortar toll'd the fun'ral Bell,
No Macer's Lungs did bawl the Rolls of Hell,
Nor did the Butchers mangle down the Beast,
Nor yet deluded by designing Priest,
But when the Vintner did hang out his Sign,
The World grew sunk in Vice and Claret Wine.
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