University of Virginia Library

6. AN UNPUBLISHED CHAPTER OF MRS. TROLLOPE.

The most intricate and perplexing difficulty, after all, to be
encountered by one going to America, to settle, who has been
accustomed to a government of impartial laws, lies in the
Yankee Judiciary Systems; or as I would call them, machines
for administering law. That of the state of New York,
is the most democratic, as it is termed, and best illustrates to
my notion, the worst evils of a republic. Mr. O'Flanagan,
—the leading lawyer at the bar of that state,—furnished me
with some facts, which, although I heard them with a holy
horror, were related by him as establishing conclusively, the
superlative excellence of their government. Their Judges
and other officers of justice are not chosen at all in reference
to their capacity, or experience, but simply in regard to their
politics. The state I have before mentioned, is cut up into
separate factions, which carry on a fierce and bloody warfare,
for the purpose of getting possession of the offices of trust and
profit. And my friend solemnly assured me that it was a universally
admitted principle, that the only legitimate object of
a republican government was the creation of offices for the
people to fight for. These are called the spoils of war, and
are distributed, with a sort of barbarian equity, among the
soldiers of the successful party, as soon as the battle is over.

The most important and lucrative situations are generally
gained by the best intriguers, and the leading chieftains.—
They, on their part, have reciprocal duties to perform, and a
solemn promise is exacted from them, when they are invested

with their offices, that, after taking care of themselves,
and their brothers, and uncles, and nephews, they will
provide out of their power of patronage, for their partisan
friends exclusively. A pregnant illustration of this rule
appears in Noah's History of New York, in the case of one
of the Chancellors of that state. The purport of the record
is to this effect;—That immediately upon the appointment
being announced to the new incumbent—who was a country
farmer—he took the boat for the city of New York, to comply
with the “immemorial usages of the party;” where, says
the veracious Noah, “he hastened to smoke the calumet of
peace with the grand Sachems, and hold a long talk by
the council fires of St. Tammany.” The meaning of all this
is, that the new Chancellor, according to custom, treated his
party to a sumptuous dinner.—It was paid for, I am told, by
the Corporation of New York,—but he had the credit of it,
—and he gave a public pledge, as to the course he would pursue.
He appointed on the spot, two Sachems,—Black Hawk
and Tecumseh,—to be masters in chancery, in the city of New
York. In the course of the evening, the grand object of the
assemblage was effected; and upon this, Noah seems to
dwell with great delight. I must quote him again—“and
now came the time for the taking of the vows, and for the
proof that the people had not been mistaken in their man.—
Supported by William-s-co and Jack-targy, and six other
chiefs, bearing bucks-tails, the noviciate arose under a canopy
of Irish linen, bearing the motto `Spolia Opima.' Nine
cheers shook the vaulted roof of the venerable wigwam,
while the signs of triumph were displayed. At length, the
general voice of joy becoming husky, the new elect, laying
hold of the ear of a half demolished cold pig, on the table,
before him,—to signify thereby, that he would go the
whole hog—pledged the toast, and vowed the vow, which
binds us to him forever. He swore to be ours, and ours alone.
To take care of number one first, and then provide for his
friends. Nay, such was the generous and magnanimous
feeling of the moment, that he drank `Death to the man that
won't take care of his friends, and decide their causes in their
favor.”'

This Chancellor, I am informed by Mr. O'Flanagan,
during his term of office, was true to his pledge. He,
immediately turned out of office all the Vice Chancellors,
and Registers, and Clerks of the eight different Circuits
of the state, and provided for eight of his brothers two of
his brothers-in-law, three uncles, and an innumerable quantity
of second cousins, and distant relatives in the country.—
This was not all; as my friend informed me; for with judicious
regard to a proper reward, for his kindness to his friends
he went into partnership with all the new officers of his appointment
and divided receipts with them. That his new
partners should not suffer by this encroachment, he added to
the fees of their office, and required things to be done, which,
O'Flanagan said needed not to have been done; and to prevent
complaint out of doors he reduced the fees of the solicitors
and counsel of the court, in a correspondent ratio. Of
this Mr. O'F. complained bitterly, and said that the next
thing he expected was that a rule would come out, requiring
every lawyer who had a case, to go to the register, or assistant
register, and give him a fee to draw his bill or answer. These
things, however, I do not well comprehend; but they show
plainly enough what republics are. One thing, O'Flanagan
told me, I think worth mentioning. After all the people of
the other party had been turned out, and their places supplied,
there were seven men left unprovided for, to whom the new

officer was deeply pledged. Having no other mode to reward
them, he appointed them extra sergeants at arms, for the express
purpose of bringing him water to drink, while engaged
in Court. The joke of it is, that to keep them in employment,
he was obliged to drink most lustily, and be taking
potations during every moment of the day. It was one eternal
sip, sip, sip. The lawyers looked on in amazement at
the Tantalian rapacity of his thirst, and the Manhattan Company
sent a petition to the legislature upon the subject. But
the committee of the house to whom the matter was referred,
were all of the Chancellor's party, and they reported that the
imbibition complained of, was no more than was necessary in
the officer who had the charge of all lunatics and poor widows
with small children, and that the practice was commendable,
since it kept constantly before the eyes of the bar, a glorious
example of the preference of cold water, to brandy. Thus
sustained, and the sign of Aquarius thus preferred, the Chancellor
drank with redoubled zeal, and appointed two new deputy
sergeants at arms. But alas! the aquatic influences at
last overwhelmed him, and he finally died of the dropsy. I
saw his tomb-stone, erected in St. Tamimany's church-yard.
On it is written a long eulogium, concluding with these
words; “Of him it may be truly said, that while he lived
he was no `small light,' and that he held his office `dum
bene, etiam optime, res pro se et suis gessit.”'[5]