 | Satires and miscellaneous poetry and prose |  |
Astrology
How Planets in Conjunction, evry minute,
Are Chopt, and Changd, yet Do their Busnes in it:
While those, that since the worlds Originall
Have been unfixt, yet never Could forestall.
As 'tis Impertinent for cheats to fix
Among the understanders of their Tricks
But rather strive, To change the Aire, and stroule
To catch the Ignorant, and unwary foule:
Whence 'tis the Stars, that dwel in th' upper Æthers,
Have all their Intrests, only in the Neather:
And as their Influences are sayd by some
To give us, what they never had at home
So all their other operations, tend
To as Ridiculous, and vaine an End:
For there's no other work of Nature else
But æqually th' Events of things foretels.
As Monsters, that for nothing were Designd,
With Omens, and Prædictions stock Mankind:
And greatest Empires steard their Interests
With Flights of Birds, and Garbages of Beasts,
Or He that Future Earth-quakes Could foretell
By Feeling Mud, i' th' Bottom of a wel,
As true as Conjuring with Virgils verse,
T' unriddle all mens fates, and Characters:
For all the Stars Conjunctions, and Ecclipses
Prædict but Picking-Pockets, worse then Gypsies.
Are Chopt, and Changd, yet Do their Busnes in it:
While those, that since the worlds Originall
Have been unfixt, yet never Could forestall.
As 'tis Impertinent for cheats to fix
Among the understanders of their Tricks
But rather strive, To change the Aire, and stroule
To catch the Ignorant, and unwary foule:
Whence 'tis the Stars, that dwel in th' upper Æthers,
Have all their Intrests, only in the Neather:
And as their Influences are sayd by some
To give us, what they never had at home
So all their other operations, tend
To as Ridiculous, and vaine an End:
For there's no other work of Nature else
But æqually th' Events of things foretels.
As Monsters, that for nothing were Designd,
With Omens, and Prædictions stock Mankind:
And greatest Empires steard their Interests
With Flights of Birds, and Garbages of Beasts,
425
By Feeling Mud, i' th' Bottom of a wel,
As true as Conjuring with Virgils verse,
T' unriddle all mens fates, and Characters:
For all the Stars Conjunctions, and Ecclipses
Prædict but Picking-Pockets, worse then Gypsies.
The Sun, and Moon, in Heaven, at so vast
A Geometrique Distance, have been Plact
That all their Different Dimensions, Here
Do of a seeming Magnitude, appeare.
Some make the Sun to th' under-Earth draw neare
So many Scores of his Diameter,
But cannot tell, If th' Antients Days, and Houres,
Were of a lesse, or Greater Length, the[n] ours:
But have no more Ground, then Astrologers,
Have for their worms, and magots of the Stars.
But have less Sense, for all they undertake
Then all their Frenzys in the Zodiack.
A Geometrique Distance, have been Plact
That all their Different Dimensions, Here
Do of a seeming Magnitude, appeare.
Some make the Sun to th' under-Earth draw neare
So many Scores of his Diameter,
But cannot tell, If th' Antients Days, and Houres,
Were of a lesse, or Greater Length, the[n] ours:
But have no more Ground, then Astrologers,
Have for their worms, and magots of the Stars.
But have less Sense, for all they undertake
Then all their Frenzys in the Zodiack.
And if the Heavns be but one Constellation,
As all to Any, have the same Relation,
(Except those Few Erroneous Vagabonds,
With which, The Earth, as falsly Corresponds)
The whole to all the Rest may Freely clame
An æquall Property, beside th[e] Name.
As all to Any, have the same Relation,
(Except those Few Erroneous Vagabonds,
With which, The Earth, as falsly Corresponds)
The whole to all the Rest may Freely clame
An æquall Property, beside th[e] Name.
The Best Astrologers are always made
Of Crackt Mechaniques, of some other Trade.
And when the Planets are Designd to Erre,
How much more must the Dul Astrologer?
When those, He is to be directed by,
Are Namd from Fraud, Imposture, and a ly?
And have their most Erroneous Santrings made,
The Principles, and Basis of a Trade.
For Tradesmen, and Mechaniques are the Primest
And Best of all Astrologers and Chymists.
Of Crackt Mechaniques, of some other Trade.
And when the Planets are Designd to Erre,
How much more must the Dul Astrologer?
When those, He is to be directed by,
Are Namd from Fraud, Imposture, and a ly?
And have their most Erroneous Santrings made,
The Principles, and Basis of a Trade.
For Tradesmen, and Mechaniques are the Primest
And Best of all Astrologers and Chymists.
Only the Devil is, yourselves aver,
The most Profound, and Deep Astrologer:
With whom no other, ever durst compare,
For, as hee's Prince, and Sultan of the Aire:
Without whose Licence, and Commission had,
No Influences dare Presume to Trade,
For 'tis but Labour thrown away, T' Incline
Unless he give them, Special Quarentine:
And Hee, who Perfectst understands their use,
Do's æqually know where to Pick, and choose,
Then whether you Apply yourselvs to him:
This way, or any else; 'tis but a whim.
The most Profound, and Deep Astrologer:
With whom no other, ever durst compare,
For, as hee's Prince, and Sultan of the Aire:
Without whose Licence, and Commission had,
No Influences dare Presume to Trade,
For 'tis but Labour thrown away, T' Incline
Unless he give them, Special Quarentine:
And Hee, who Perfectst understands their use,
Do's æqually know where to Pick, and choose,
Then whether you Apply yourselvs to him:
This way, or any else; 'tis but a whim.
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For whores, and Hectors, when th' are Past
Their Labour, and grown Old and Cast,
Turn Naturally, as the Imps
To other Harlots, Bawds, and Pimps.
Their Labour, and grown Old and Cast,
Turn Naturally, as the Imps
To other Harlots, Bawds, and Pimps.
As those that buy a Salmon-draught
Pay for the Fish, before 'tis Caught.
Pay for the Fish, before 'tis Caught.
Suppose a Figure Calculated,
The Geniture exactly stated:
Another of the Self-same Person
With æqual care, and Animadversion
By way of Horary-Inspection,
Th' Effect, of this, or that Erection
Must be the very same; or else
The one, or both must need[s] be False.
The Geniture exactly stated:
Another of the Self-same Person
With æqual care, and Animadversion
By way of Horary-Inspection,
Th' Effect, of this, or that Erection
Must be the very same; or else
The one, or both must need[s] be False.
Or He that snapt the Guards of Jupiter,
And listed them to serve the Emperor.
When all the sevral ways of virtuosing
Are but a formal Sort, of Dry Deboshing:
Which made the A[n]tients Celebrat an Owle
As th' only Proper Philosophique Foul.
And listed them to serve the Emperor.
When all the sevral ways of virtuosing
Are but a formal Sort, of Dry Deboshing:
Which made the A[n]tients Celebrat an Owle
As th' only Proper Philosophique Foul.
For witches are no sooner taken
By their Treacherous Imps [forsaken],
And when by Law, th' are ceasd upon
Are only Hangd for being None.
As Empson with the sivs he wrought,
Could never finde his Fortune out.
By their Treacherous Imps [forsaken],
And when by Law, th' are ceasd upon
Are only Hangd for being None.
As Empson with the sivs he wrought,
Could never finde his Fortune out.
One Night the Sun far more obscures,
Then all th' Ecclipses He Endure's.
Then all th' Ecclipses He Endure's.
All Poynts of Heaven, are at Noone,
As soon as Entred by the Sun.
As soon as Entred by the Sun.
A Prophet has no need of Being wise
When all his Art, in Dreams, and visions Ly's.
When all his Art, in Dreams, and visions Ly's.
And like a Second sighted Scot
Could foresee, all the Heavens Plot.
Could foresee, all the Heavens Plot.
Did not Menippus mounted in the Moon,
Discover all, that upon Earth was don?
Or shee at th' Entrance of th' Ecclyps, foreshow
The Macedonians Kings overthrow?
And did not only make the Dire Portent
But was the Real Cause of the Event.
For th' Antient Romans, only by their Cuninge
In our Profession, stoutly overrunne him.
And if wee can th' Ecclyps it self foretell
Why should wee not th' Event of it, as well?
Discover all, that upon Earth was don?
Or shee at th' Entrance of th' Ecclyps, foreshow
The Macedonians Kings overthrow?
And did not only make the Dire Portent
But was the Real Cause of the Event.
For th' Antient Romans, only by their Cuninge
In our Profession, stoutly overrunne him.
And if wee can th' Ecclyps it self foretell
Why should wee not th' Event of it, as well?
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