University of Virginia Library

[Act: Quint:]

[sc. i]

Enter. Geraldine. Varletti gallant wt h staves. Kather
Varl
Morrow to my good Lord of Conon, [capt] champeon Roiall
to the kinge, Mr off the Horse, & captaine of both the
guards pentioners & switzers.

Ger
the like to my good Lord of Deuon chefe generall of
the Romaine Garison, Lord high [admirall &] Marshall
& admirall of the Navy royall.

Kath.
I mary sr theres deitie in these Titles
Able to inchant & make a man Imortall,

Ger
& is not this better then lyeing like a boare in a stye
crawncheing of raw Acornes. thy life & diet in thy confinemt.
was no better.

Kath
thine scarce so good thank a few huskes of Intelligence, that
the counsellor, that betterd it

Ger
oh my Sariant of the Coife when I am king once, wc h wilbe
wt hin these two dayes now, & this percy were come once,
for alls but buble & shadow wt hout him—

Kath.
I wonder at his stay, I writ to him to full purpose

Varl
& se the man. right noble vncle—

Archiballd Enters
Ger.
Bold Percy wellcome—

Deuon Elyd. Conon
Kath.
yor lingring frighted vs, & all most killd
the hart of the most Hopefull Expedition,

Arch.
Now & I can but hit of his ratling humor. lingring?
hoida, knaves & fooles Boyes & girles, tell me of
lingeringe? & I ware in ffrance againe, Ide se
yow all flead, & roasted alive, like soe many
but now I am spich cocks, ere Ide take halfe this paines to releve[OMITTED]
Landed with why when, knaves garzone my horse.

fil:
[presently sr

knaves & boyes my capt: horse ther

(Marginal note)

]

Kath.
[yow must soothe vp his humor, hele begone againe else,]

Ger
[Nay good sr. staye, How ever they talke Idlye]
[I know it a labour worthy Hercules,]
[to ship & land so many horse & men,]
[on such a sodaine.]

Arch
[why thow speakest somwt. like sence yet. Ile tell«e» the wt.]
[geraldine I take it]

Ger.
[old Gilbert sonn sr]

Arch.
[now, I remember the: thow hadst a father, a stowt]
[waryour he was, & a boldone, he & I have followed]
[an execution, when our prowd coursers have Ietted]
[in purple Buskins, & trod the lofty Mattachins in blood]

Ger
[a good solyor he was]

Arch.
[nay there were a coople of vs, & such a coople as]
[tho I sait, but to the busyness.]

Varl
[A chaire & a cushion, for myne vncle good sr the]
[manner of yr Landing]

Arch.
[in a word thus. Hanniball went over the Alpes, a lofty]
[attempt & a high one, but his men made hym a paire]
[of staires first, wc h tooke his clamberinge credit one story Lower]
[by his Leave, Horatius swom Tibur in his Armor]

Ger.

Varl.
[give hym Leave hele Iump Into th* Britaine the next.]

Arch
[da Mercy Sextus that beat him off land and made him]
[take water for his life. his reputacōn and memory]
[had both sunck else, ffabius cunctator came somwt. neere]
[me, I conffesse but alas the day he fell short too, an]
[vnmercifull deale short]

Varl.
[but how the manner gentle vncle tell vs—]

Arch.
[knaves & fooles yar not worth it, suffice I did it, let]
[boyes & girles set there Idle witts a work to learne how]
but now I am Landed wt h this my dareing associate in wt, forwardnes is yor proiect?

Varl
Ready for execution the Ro: garrisons are all ours.

Ger:
my freinds & tenants Armd in readynes. Conon Deuon
& Elydure, muzled in there Kennells of confynement

Conon
They are loose Inough to pluck out yor throates tho—[but]

filius),
& yow be not hees a fre«n»d in a corner to help yw.

Elyd. [Deu.]
but haveing all things in Readines

Arch
I Knaves & fooles, why fall yow not to instant action then

Varl.
onely for lack off yow, we ha power but want direccōn

Ger
Have the Lyon at advantage, but want Art to shackle
him in the Toile,

Varl
ffredome at comand, but know not how to manage it

Ger
A Crowne in our ey but want Authority to set it on
our heads.

Kath.
now wt h all theis wants can yow and yor grave associates
furnishe em,

Archib
knaves & fooles so I can too, but are yow willing to
put that honl b e. offyce vpon my trust

Ger.
Make yow our Generall. put our selvs and solyor s. vnder
comaund of yw and thes yor noble assistants

Cono:
& we desire no more.

fil:
but to have yw like hounds in so
many halters no more

Elid:
twilbe for yor s. and the whole kingdomes good then—

Varl
Voweing to doe nothing wt hout or contrary to yor dirccon

Arc.
Sweare that vpon my sword. why good a mercy—& since
yow have conferd that place of trust vpon me, yow shall
se old Iack will discharge it, wt h that Corage & fidelitye
as yow & all Britaine [& the whole world] shall have Iust cause
to comend me. but knaves & boyes heads must off &
& tall ones too.

Varl
Spare none, if they oppose yow hew em downe

Ger.
better no head say I then not a crowne.

Arch
why darst thow weare a crowne thinkst & thow hadst it

Ger
how were one? yes and dy
wt ht in my Armes.—

fil:
by mars his helmet so durst I
& I had but right toot not els

Arch.
knaves & boyes that wele trye
awaye I long for execution—

Ext
Con.
Be britaine blest in the successe

[sc. ii]

Enter Prorex. Lords, Gilbert
Pro
Come on mr waspe yow have Been so busy wt h our
Ladyes, Looze fore parts,, head tyres & trymeings, yow
have made em Angry—

Gilb:
Angry? marry Buzz why angry. they askt me wt. vanityes
were most in fashion, & I think I told em there owne
is there any hurt in telling em there owne

1. Lod.
some Citizens, marchants & mony masters wold be glad
to be told there owne, [n]

2. L.
there can be no hurt in telling any man or woma ther owne

Pro.
noe hurt at all, but come thow hast byn a great traveler
wt. country yelds best Honny.

Gilb.
Hony. theres some in all, & very good in most, but first wt h
yor owne, theres excellent Hony at roome, but the wall[s]—
fflowers tis gatherd on, being waterd wt h the first founders.
blood, it tasts so bitter of a weed calld splenewortt—&.

Pro.
noe more yar Bitter buz on to next

Gilb
excellent Hony all Italy over; but tas a smack of Narcissus
flower, Philautia or self love, & that mars the sale of it

1. L.
tis a shrowd Blemishe to the cuntry & much takt off

Pro.
The complexion of the climbe nothing else.

Gilb:
Admirable Hony in Spaine, & as yellow as gold, but being symples
gatherd of an Herbe calld Indean Rue, & [the topps] of [the «Iland»s] of—the mountaynès
[Tyranye], takes [much of] the virtue from it.

2. L:
that fault is much mended a late tho.

Pro.
ech contry has his discomoditie, wt. Hony in ffraunce,

Gilb:
plenty of Hony there, but I dare not be to busy wt h them,
for feare the Bees sting me by the browes.

Pro.
Are they a wing theyle be soone downe agen,

1. L:
Nullum violentu perpetuū, wt. Hony in Russia?

Gilb.
Admirable Hony there, but theres such civell war betwixt
the Bees & the bears a stranger cannot get a combe
amongst em.

Pro:
ffrom them to holland wt Hony yeilds that?

Gilb.
Holland, or No land meane yw, if it be any tis but a skirt
rent off [the] anothers coate [of spaine], there bees gather wt. Hony
they haue, o the water, [& that smells so ranck of sea
wrack, blood wort & piracye,] not one amongst a 1000
cares for tasting of it

Pro.
I cannot blame em, wt Hony in Britaine?

Gilb
oh yor British Hony caryes the name from em all, Hamp—
sheire espetially. but the poore russet Bee that should
gather it is so terribly afflicted by a swarme of pestilent
out landishe flyes, new stolne over from Rome sure
for we had none of em here till they came in wt h Cesar

1 L.
In wt h Cesar? take hede wt yw buz waspe? in wt h Cesar?

Pro.
fflyes from Rome, wt are they

Gilb
nay I know em not, they never drunk a my cup, & yet they
are sawcy Inough. some of there names ly scatterd
vp & downe my memory & I could hitt of em, oh Exaction oprssion
monopoly, symonye, transportacion, extortion, Rack rent
vsery Brokery Bribery knavery knavery, all manner
of knaverye, not an honest British name amongst em

[Pro.
all thes Delinquents if we find em reall.]

[Gilb.
Reall mary Buz find em & fine em. punish em & pillory]
em, Hamper em, Hang 'em, such outlandishe Lurchers, if]
any such ther be at least for I speake by heare saye]
steale both Hony & Wax Credit & proffit, from the poore]
natiue Be Brand, burne, banish rid the Land of e'm.]
Send em home (Like vagrants) to lick there owne mothers]
milke, they have suckt too much British blood, by here say]
I cannot condem them, the mores the pitty]

[Pro.
thow art honest, & I dare proclaime the Loyall]
thy zeale vnto the comon good confirmes it]
& now from thes to thine owne Busynes]
thy wife has challengd the of much vnkindnes—]

[Gilb.
my wife challeng me, marry Buz. I am here in the list ready]
to answere her, at her owne wepon, let her enter when she dare[OMITTED]]

Pro.
now gentle woma, yor Husbands here in personn.—

Enter Howlet & Countess
Count.
my husband, I defy him, scorne hym renowne him
disclayme hym, Am the worse when I looke vpon hym.

Howl
oh the fretts mr s. [the] Remembr the frets: many a good horse dye of em

Count
poore Beggerly fellow I tooke him in & kept him of Allmes
to be my foole & make my freinds merrye

Gilb
ffoole? trickes in myne age? Beggerly foole, trickes Merry trix
wife, I shall fly out, I shall buzz. I shall sting do wemen
take husbands to make fooles off

Count.
[once more I scorne the, fly to the Devill, & spare not, buz till thy]
[neck breake I care not]

How.
[nor I nether but the fretts take heed on the ffretts good Mr s.]

Count.
[sting thy hart out I shalbe glad ont.]

Gilb.
[buz buz.]

How
[ware wasp Mr s. he bites his thombe, hes angry, downe [good]]
[submit, humble yr selfe, or he exalts & that presentlye]

Count
my husband poore fellow.

Gilb
yor husband prowd huswife, or as good a man as ever went
on his Leggs at Least

Count
thow wert not worth to truss his points, make cleane his shoe«s»
pardon my Leige, but plese pervse this: yow may Conceive as a Paper
muche, Helpe to vncase me sra.—

a Paper
Howl
I have vncasd, & vnlacd many a fat conye in my tyme
but ha not felt a plumper kidny in my [tyme] dayes, yow do not
shame yor pasture, yow thryve & Batten well—but-vds
me the countess.

Pro.
Rise noble countess we conveive thy wrongs—
& cannot but comend thy noble courage
not to give way to Basenes, sr a. recant
yor Herezy, or looke for punishement

Gilb
recant? mary Buz I scorne it, disclaime it, she knows I
knewe her aswell before,

Howl.
as my father did my mother [behinde]

Gilb.
wt. I have said Ile maintaine, I have wed & beded her

Count.
bedded me

Howl.
I am witnes toot

Gilb
I am as good a man as ere went of old Gills leggs

Count.
my husbads legs

How.
Ile be disposd, vpont

Gilb
& crave no better Iudge then yor marestye

How.
nor other foreman of the Iury then Howlet

Pro.
old Claridon Alive.

Count.
my noble Lord & husband

Gilb
yr husband, fy no, a begarly fellow yw kept of Allmes.
to be yor foole & make yr freinds mery, merry trix in
yor age wife do yow remember that

Count.
pardon my Ignorance

Gilb:
intreat his Mat i e s.
that note will give yor grace Ample sufficeinges
of all occurrents past, & for our owne parts now like a coopl*
of Babes we have wrangled our Belly fulls, wele
like a paire of Loveing Turtles, bill buz & be freinds
agen, sra begon

Howl.
my old Ivy bushe, I know my Lodging, let yor sonn whoot
me out there now & he Dare

Pro.
yor sonne I se has plaid the wag but tyme,
will tame hym, we have put some Honors on him
Noyes.
wc h if well vssd may vsher more,—wt hdrawe,


Ext.


«st»rong guard for the great Chamber,


[OMITTED] make good the presence

«[OMITTED] ch:»
have an ey to the private staires there

oes.
Downe wt h the tyrant downe wt h the opressor

Pro:
Enter. Var: Gerd Arch: Conon. Devon Elyd[OMITTED]

oēs.
ffrom-vs-from all.—

fil:
yes & from me too—

filius
wt hin—
downe wt h the tyrant downe wt h the oppressor.

Arch
Hark dost Here king? the whole land speaks no other Language

Pro.
Are yow turnd rebells? have our Honourd favours
created traytors.

oēs:
No, but trew harted subiects

Pro:
why come yow then in Armes?

Varl.
to right my wrongs.

Ger.
revenge my fathers murder

Arch.
My vniust banishment?

Pro
Art thow there percy! cuthroat—

Arch
yes knaves & fooles to make thy court a slaughter howse.

Pro
Traytors! wheres Conon, Devon Elidure

Ger.
Ha yow forgot yw sent em home to there cuntry farmes, to
shale beanes & lap butter milke, they were too wise
yow must ha fooles a bout yow.

Varl.
Emptie revellers & loose prodigalls, that have nether
wit nor tyme to thinck of state

Ger
a few cast offices are Bawbles good Inough for such babes
to playe wt hall, they looke not so hye as a crowne, Ile be
so bold as Looke of this tho—

Arch
doe, looke out & spare not, but for thy head lay not a
disloyall—hand int, am not I yor generall. ha

Con. De
we his assistants Ioynd in comission saye

Ger.
How the old wolfes barke; we do confess it & yow shall be obeyd

Con. D.
nay we wilbe obeyd—

fil:
I we must be obeyd

Arch.
must, must & wilbe obayd. have yow not hunted the lyon,
into the Toile, Posse et Nolle Nobile, the Honor lyes in the
conquest not in the case, please yor Mt i e resigne yor
Crowne, & trust me wt h the kepeing of it.

Pro.
Synce ffate has servd her prowd Mandamus on Me
& yet my Romaine spirit can scarce obeyt
[as good resigne by faire means as by force]
this golden Ball, lent me to play wt hall
the chase being lost I tosse into the Hazard,
Let a ffreshe gamster taket, but traitors knowe
yow rob not me But Cezar and hele throwe
his thonder bolts amongst yow.

Ger.
Let em come, let em come, wele thonder em,

Varl.
& bolt hym too quite out off Britaine, if these Iron Bars
hold at Least.

Arch.
knaves & fooles is not this Better, now then Violence

Ger.
It Argues yor Experience. & Indeed we sent for yw to purpose the same

Pro.
now to wt. Iaile or dungeon? I deservt
for plucking downe the trew Nobillity
& raiseing Boyes & vpstarts.

Arch.
Art advizd of that king, theres no trusting «s[OMITTED]»
state buildings espetiallye, theyle giue in «p[OMITTED]»
old Iacks of a Better season tho, thow ha«s[OMITTED]»
Crowne, & Ile warrant thy personn, wt h fa[OMITTED]
vsage too; Ile make some shoulders walk wt hou«**s»
Ile onely make bold to trye a conclusion wt h thy Crowne,

Ger.
the old ffellow workes him handsomelye,

Varl.
did I not say so I chose em to the same purpose

Arch.
now Geraldine, hears the golden Curry combe, yor head Itch to
be rubd wt h: & cause old Iack wilbe as goods his worde, sit &
Soft Musike.
Inioy it, A Banquet, Musick, & royall attendaunts for
yor new king there—

A Table ffurnisht, Ladyes &c
Varl:
I knew there would come a tyme for bells & bonefyers,
[now, whoe is the state scarcrow now? who playes the mock]
[king now? Live Geraldine & live long my fellow kinge]

Ger
[two words to a Bargaine sr. by yor Leave—king]
[that word begetts a new Creation in me,]
[makes me Imortall, speake it Againe]

Varl.
[I shall great fellow king.]

fil:
[oh that my berd were color de Roy]
[of the hayre royall how wood I scramble to be a King]

Ger:

Arch
[that myne are yo w now mr off—(rich Indean)]

Varl.
[He & I vncle, twas a covenant betwixt vs]

Arch.
[open yor caskett royall, toss & tumble yr Iewells—take wt]
[yow list yor selfe & [tak throw] tosse the rest to yr freinds]

Var.
[wele make a muss wt h em amongst our ffavorites, who sitts]
[on the Zenith of for tunes whele now? whose tumbled to the]
[Antipodes now?]

Pro.
[thes scoffs afflict me more then my deposeing]

Arc.
[Men of yor owne creating, statsmen of yor owne choseinge]
but come fall to, theres nectar & Ambrosia, why do yow
not bath it. a Bank of roses on one side & a bed of violets
of the tother, tomble em, toss em, ruffle em Riffle e'm
& make the blusheing Leaves fly about there ears in kisses,

Pro.
How the old Ruffian hartens on his cubbs.

Varl.
why trew, we sent for hym to the same purpose

Ger.
thart a brave Bold & noble counsellor, Ladyes lay by yr
blushes yow may have more cause to weare them anon,
now lets fall to, heres Vyands for a—
the table turns & such things apeare
devill: snakes toads & newtes go cram
em downe the traitors throats

Arch.
wt. for there Art, they are vyands fashiond into thes proportions
by art, for the more state & novelty.

Val:
And yow ha no stomach, let me come, & they were lyve
scorpions Ide ceaze em—


[OMITTED]? nay then I cry yow mercy. & death. thy stir & *all


[OMITTED] the dishes
[OMITTED]ar yor confectionary yelds, & the livelyest, if they wonot


[OMITTED]ne stay yor stomach heare.
«m»ary sr. thes plesurs are naturall, art has not poisend thes
«y»et: come let me play the wanton on yor Brests
[OMITTED] whilst yow chase winged Cupids in myne Eyes,
& take em prisoners in these golden tramells.

{L}ad.
noe sir we have stronger toyles to take yow in
Lust full incestuous [tyrant] trayter.

Ger.
death a she Hangman

2.lady
nay heres a coople of vs.

Pro.
Theres somt looks like worth in this old fellow.

Ger.
the old Ruffian fflowtes me

Varl.
why did yow not send for him to the same purpose. I se his
ayme he kepes the crowne for me da mercy good uncke.

Ger.
Treason our Guard

Conon.
we are ready for yw sr.

Deu.
stirr & yow dye

Ger:
my Intrailes burne reache me som wine

Arch:
wine for the king, & se yow spict well,

Ger.
villaine wt putst intoot

Elyd.
nothing but a litle ratsbane

Varl.
A delicate cooler for a hot Lyver, are yow content I shalbe yr fellow king—yet

Ger
Am I a king?

Pro.
such a one as tis.

Varl.
but the Itching of my Brow sayes yow will not be so longe.

Ger
& Dare yow vse me thus
feed me wt h snakes associate me wt h strumpetts
poisen my wine corrupt my officers
(a sword hangs & fury
since all below conspire against me: Heaven
sheild me, protect me, save me, guard me se, [se]—
se a nakd sword hangs by a slender twine
Iust ore my head-se-se-a fury Armd
wt h sheeres to cut it, hold:—Omnipotence
Enter Gilbert
my ffathers ghost too, all my youth full synns
ripen togither & fall downe in clusters
about myne ears we shall have a full Harvest.

Arch.
open yor casket royall now, thers variety of Antidotes apply
some of them now.

Ger.
do not afflict me thow old devill do not

Pro
did yow not send for him to the same purpose?

Ger.
I am amazd, distracted, frantick all
my vaines instead of blood are choakd wt h gellye
ffeare nums my synews, I have nether strength
corage nor any sum-tom of a man
in or about me, yow gods of Britaine, free me.

Pro.
No cause thow scorndst the gods in thy Excesse
theile hurle the headlong to the Antipodes.

Varl.
thow shalt not live to seet

ronns at hym
Conon.
but he may sr. & there yow ly now.

(strike him vp—
Deu.
he is our charge & we dare protect him

Pro.
I thank yow for my life, & owe yow fort

Arch.
Better no head then no crowne, do yow remember that? yow wood
Live & dy wt ht in yor Armes thinke vpon that, yw are sworne
to be rulde by me too in all, do not quite forget that. yw have
[the crowne]/[it] for yor owne plesure & yr head shall were it for myne, [ether]
[or]/[of] yor sholders [«o»r of a hop poale chose yw wc h.] were no head chose wch

Ger:
[my]/[noe] head? pray take it, take it wt hall my [A] hart
but first «take» hence my fears

Arch.
ffears: knaves & fooles were yow he that «m»
danger? for a crowne [& now yow are «p]lyve & dy wt h it in yor Arm*
away lik a scorpion now yw hate. [agen,] yow are willing to resig[OMITTED]

Ger.
yes on my knee, on my Bare knee & th«e»

Arch:
yowle be no king then, not to have his c[OMITTED]

Ger.
are my heles now this golden hoopes off my «h[OMITTED]»

Arch.
A Britaine & afraid to were a Crowne I am ashamd on the coze[OMITTED]
yow are a right Romaine Spirrit, & will go to «B[OMITTED]»
the Devill for a crowne, will yow were it

Varl.
I knew twold come to this, were the Crowne? & thank y«w» too
& now good nuncle take away thes Horrors.

Arch.
Take e'm away why tis Impossible, they are as inseperable
attendants on a Crowne, as the shadow to the body. wc h tho
sometimes darkened, yet never for sakes it.

Varl.
Ile be no king then

Kath.
Cowardly Pesant: have I spent my Braine?
troubled my freinds, put my dere life & Credit
in hazard to advance the, & but take the Crowne
& weare it like a man, or like a Beast
fall by a woman.

Conon.
good at stabbing staye
Impartiall Iudges must maintaine fayre playe
yowle be noe kinge

Arch.
no king? make a foole of old Iack, shall Britaine have no king?
Are yow content the prorex shall hav [the Crowne]/[it] Againe then.

Varl.
wt h all my hart, & wishe hym no greater punishment for all
my wrongs.

Ger.
Nor I for myne, & my fathers murder

Arch.
knaves & fooles wt. a puzle has thes boyes put me to, please
yow great sr. receive yor Crowne Againe, I borrowd it onely
to trye a Conclusion, (as I told yor highnes) & now tis Done
humbly on my knee, as I receivd it, I surrender it:

Pro.
Wood I had more such traitors

Arch.
Now please yr mat i e. fill yor chaire Agen, [knaves & fooles]
the boyes cannot fit it, some musick, please yor highnes tast
a homely Banquet

Soft Musi«k»e.
Ger
A poacht toad, or a live snake, twill make yow looke yong in yor grave

Pro:
wt h a good Appetite, for this Discourse
Table turnes
has Bred one in me, & thes comfortable vyands.

Ger
generall let me be king Againe now.

Varl.
vnckle or me: me at any hand good vnckle—

Arc.
knaves & fooles, yor old cates will crawle about ye agen then—

Varl
why waite they not on him then?

Arch.
They are onely seene to vsurpers such as yow are
but like darke shadows they Crepe after him
& Dare not Looke a trew king in the face
his Lookes are armd wt h such Divinitye
they alter Nature, & Drive essences
out off all Being. strike treason on it knees
—Con. De. Knele
turne Arrogance into obedience
Lad. Knele An Angell wo«v»e «the p[OMITTED]»
& devills them selvs to Angells, he can vnlock
yor Caskett royall; & weare all these Iewells
in there trew Lustres, that crowne the wedding Ring
ffitts no mans Temples but a royall king.

Conō.
& this is he, yow traitors & vsurpers
& so we ceaze yow.

Ger.
we sent not for yow to that purpose tho, as I rember.