University of Virginia Library

ACT IIII.

SCENE I.

Enter Money.
Money.
Libertie, libertie, now I cry libertie:
Catch me againe when you can, Prodigalitie.
Neuer was there poore soule so cruelly handled:
I was at the first, like a Cockney dandled,
Stroakt on the head, kist and well cherished,
And so thought surely I should haue continued:
But now how my case is altered suddenly;
You would not beleeue, vnlesse you saw it apparantly.


I faith since ye saw me, I haue bin turmoyled
From post to piller: see how I am spoyled.
The villaines among them prouided the roft,
But Money was forced to pay for the cost,
Both of their feasting, and of their chamber cheere,
Yea in euery place, they haue fleec't me so neere,
He a fleece and she a fleece; that nothing could I keepe,
But glad to runne away like a new shorne sheepe.
And though I haue bin pinched very neere,
I am glad to see you in good health euery one here:
And now I haue escaped the traiterous treachery
Of such a thriftlesse Roysting company,
To my mother in haste againe I will get me,
And keepe at home safely: from thence let them fet me.

SCENE II.

Enter Vanitie and Money.
Van.
What, master Money, how goeth the world with you?

Money.
Looke but vpon me, thou maist quickly iudge how.

Van.
Why, where the vengeāce, where the diuel hast thou bin?
Among brambles, or bryers, or spirits sure, I weene.

Money.
Both weene it, and wot it, I haue past a wildernesse
Of most mischieuous and miserable distresse;
Sharpe brambles, sharpe bryers, and terrible scratchers,
Beares, Wolues, Apes, Lyons, most rauening snatchers,
Thornes, thistles, and nettles most horrible stingers,
Rauens, grypes, and gryphons, oh vengible wringers,
Yea through my whole passage such damnable sights,
As I cannot but iudge them most damnable sprites.

Van.
Hah, hah, ha, ha.

Money.
Laugh ye, my friend? It is no laughing toy.

Van.
But who did guide you in this laborinth of ioy?

Money.
Who sir? your minion sir, Prodigalitie,


The Captaine elected of all roysting knauery,
He will be hang'd, I warrant him shortly.

Van.
Hah, hah, ha, ha.

Money.
Yet goe to, laugh on.

Van.
Are you not a cuck, cuck-cold?

Money.
I may be indeed, my clothes be but thin,
And therefore I will euen goe get me in,
That Fortune my mother may cloth me anew.

Exit.
Van.
Doe so, you had need so, I may say to you.
Now sure it is a world of worlds to see,
How all the world inclines to Vanitie:
Men seeke at first, that is but Vanitie,
And lose at last that was but Vanitie,
And yet continue still to follow Vanitie,
As though it were a thing of certaintie:
And I that beare the name of Vanitie,
And see the worlds exceeding vanitie,
In following so the tracks of vanitie,
Doe triumph still amid my Empery,
And laugh at their simplicity,
That will be so misse-led by Vanitie,
But who is this? oh I know him, a scholer of our traine,
Tis Hob a clunch, that comes for money againe.

SCENE III.

Enter Tenacitie, Vanitie, Fortune, and Money.
Ten.
God speed, Mast Fanitie.

Van.
Wocum, Mast Tenacitie.

Ten.
Sur, cham come once againe vor money.

Van.
So me thinks.

Ten.
Shals be sped now at length trow ye?

Van.
I cannot tell ye, tis hard to say;
Peraduenture yea, peraduenture nay.



Ten.
How so man?

Van.
I feare me you will spend him too fast away.

Ten.
Hoh, hoh, ho, ho, dost thou veare, that friend Fanitie?
Shalt not need man, chill keepe him safe, che warrant thee.
Oh that chad him in my clouches, shoudst see I tro,
Whether chud keepe him vast and safe or no.
I pray thee, good sweet Mast Fanitie,
Speake one good word for poore Tenacity.

Van.
And dost thou indeed so well loue money?

Ten.
Doe my wiues Bees at home, thinkst thou, loue honey?

Van.
What wouldst thou doe with it?

Ten.
Chud chud, chud, chud.

Van.
Chud, chud, what chud?

Ten.
Chud doe no harme at all.

Van.
No, nor much good (I thinke) to great nor small.
But well, put case I procure thee to speed,
You will remember your promise that I shall be fee'd.

Ten.
Gods vast, man, yea chill doe it, chill doe it.

Van.
Stand there a while and wayte.
Bright goddesse, behold here againe Tenacity,
That humbly makes his sute to haue money.

Money.
For money? ho there: money findes himselfe well:
Money now hath no liking from Fortune to dwell.

Van.
In vanum laborauerunt, come.

Ten.
Now good soote, hony, vaire, golden mustresse,
Let poore Tenacitie taste of thy goodnesse:
Thee che honour, thee che serue, thee che reuerence,
And in thy help, che put my whole confidence.

For.
Money, you must goe to him, there is no remedy.

Money.
Yea, and be vs'd as before with Prodigalitie.

Ten.
Let Prodigalitie goe to the gallowes tree:
Why man, he and I are cleane contrary?
I chill coll thee, chill cusse thee.

Money.
So did he.

Ten.
Chill saue thee, chill spare thee, chill keepe thee from wasting.

Money.
So did not he.


Goe to then, seeing that my mothers will is such,
To put in aduenture I may not grutch.

Ten.
Oh, my sweeting, my darling, my chewel, my ioy,
My pleasure, my treasure, mine owne prettie boy.

Mon.
How now? what meane you by this, Tenacitie?

Ten.
Oh, forbid me not to kisse my sweete Money.
Varewell, Vortune: and Vortune, che thanke thee alway.
Come on, surra, chill make you vast, bum vay.

Mon.
What with ropes? what needes that?

Ten.
Vor veare of robbing by the high way.
La, mi, fa sol, fa, sol, mi, fa, re, mi.

Here Tenacity goeth to the Iune for his Asse.
Exit.

SCENE IIII.

Enter Prodigalitie, Dicke Dicer, Vanitie, and Tom Tosse.
Prod.
O monstrous vile filthie lucke! see, in the twinkling of an eye,
Scarce knowing which way, I haue quite lost my Money.

Dick.
Out of all doubt, Prodigalitie, he is not gone yonder way.

Prod.
Then seeke some other course, make here no stay:
He must be found out, there is no remedie.
Thou knowest in what pickle we stand without Money.

Dick.
VVhy sure, Prodigality, it can be no other,
But he is returned to Fortune his mother.

Prod.
Thinkest thou so?
Thou, Fortune, hearest thou? by faire meanes I aduise thee,
Restore my Money to me agane, deale plainely and wisely:
Or by this sharpe-edged sword, shalt see me play a proud part.
For I will haue him againe, in spite of thy hart.

Van.
Whome haue we there, that keepeth such a coyle?

Prod.
Euen he that will not put vp such a foyle.

Van.
What's the matter?



Prod.
Vanitie, to that dame thy mistris commend me
Tell her, tell her, it doth not a little offend me,
To haue my money in such great despight,
Taken so from me, without any right.
What though it were once her owne proper gift?
Yet giuen, 'tis mine owne, there is no other shift.
Therefore charge her in the name of Prodigality,
That he be restor'd to me incontinently,
Lest she repent it.

Van.
These be sore and cruell threatnings, marry.
Is your haste so great, that by no meanes you may tarry?

Prod.
I will not tarry, and therefore make haste.

Van.
Soft, sir, a little, there is no time past.
You may tarry, you must tarry, for ought as I know:
Nay, then you shall tarry, whether you wil or no.

Exit.
Dick.
Swounds, sir, he mocks you.

Prod.
Gibe not with me, you hoorson raskall slaue,
For money I come, and money will I haue.
Sirra, Vanity, Vanity. What, Vanity?
Speake and be hang'd, Vanity. What wil't not be?

Dick.
What a prodigious knaue, what a slaue is this?

Prod.
Fortune, fine Fortune, you, minion, if ye be wise,
Bethinke ye betimes, take better aduise:
Restore vnto me my money quietly,
Else looke for warres: Vanity, Fortune, Vanity.

Dick.
Sir, you see it booteth not.

Prod.
It is but my ill lucke.
Now the diuell and his damme giue them both sucke.
What may we doe? what counsell giu'st thou, Dicke?

Dick.
Marry, sir, be rul'd by me, Ile shew you a tricke,
How you may haue him quickly.

Prod.
As how?

Dick.
Scale the walles, in at the window, by force fet him.

Prod.
None better in faith, fetch a ladder, and I will set him.
Fortune, thou iniurious dame, thou shalt not by this villanie,
Haue cause to triumph ouer Prodigality.


Why speakst thou not, why speakst thou not, I say?
Thy silence doth but breede thine owne hurt and decay.

Dick.
Here is a ladder.

Here Prod. scaleth. Fortune claps a halter about his neck, he breaketh the halter & falles.
Prod.
Set it to.

Prod.
Swounds, helpe, Dick: helpe quickly, or I am choakt.

Dick.
God a mercie good halter, or els you had beene yoakt.

Prod.
O thou vile, ill-fauoured, crow-troden, pye-pecked Roni!
Thou abominable, blinde, foule filth, is this thy wont,
First, maliciously to spoyle men of their good,
And then by subtill sleights thus to seeke their blood?
I abhorre thee, I defie thee, wheresoeuer I go,
I doe proclaime my selfe thy mortall foe.

Tom Tosse.
Newes, Prodigality, newes.

Dick.
Good, and God will.

Prod.
What newes, Tom?

Tom.
I haue met with money.

Prod.
Where?

Tom.
Marry sir, he is going into a strange countrie,
With an old chuffe called Tenacity.

Prod.
Tenacity? is that Tinkers boudget so full of audacity?

Tom.
Tis true.

Prod.
May we not ouertake him?

Tom.
Yes, easily with good horses.

Prod.
Let's go then for Gods sake, wee'le catch him in a trap.

Dick and Tom.
Go, we will go with you, what euer shall hap.

SCENE V.

Enter Vanity, and Fortune.
Van.
O rotten rope, that thou must be so brittle!
Hadst thou but happened to haue held a little,
I had taught my princocks against another time,


So to presume dame Fortunes bowre to clime.
To make such a scape, his hap was very good.
Well, he scaped faire, I sweare by the rood:
But will you haue me say my fantasie,
Quod differtur, non aufertur. For assuredly
The Gentleman will neuer hold himselfe quiet,
Till once more he come to taste of this dyet.
Marke the end.

For.
Vanitie?

Van.
Madam.

For.
Is this Royster gone?

Van.
Yea, Madam, he is gone.

For.
Then get thee anon,
And cause my attendants to come away,
For here as now I will no longer stay,
But prosecute this foe of mine so fast,
By mischiefes all I may, that at the last,
He shall arriue vnto a wretched end,
And with repentance learne how to offend
A goddesse of my state and dignitie.

Van.
Lady, to do your will, I hasten willingly.
Vanitie exit.

Come downe.
For.
Dame Fortunes power, her most exceeding might,
Is knowne by this as an vndoubted thing:
Since here most plainely hath appear'd in sight,
How all the world doth hang vpon her wing,
How hie and low, of all states and degrees,
Doe rise and fall againe as she decrees.
Then let not Vertue thinke it scorne to yeeld,
To Fortune chiefe of power, chiefe soueraignety:
Sith Fortune here by proofe hath wonne the field,
Subdude her foes, and got the victorie:
For as she list to fauour, els to frowne,
She hoyseth vp, or headlong hurleth downe.

Van.
Madam, here are your vassals ready prest,


To doe the thing that Fortune liketh best.

For.
Well then, come on, to witnes this our victorie,
Depart we hence with sound of same triumphantly.

Reuerence, due reuerence.