University of Virginia Library

ACT. I.

SCEN. I.

Cosmeta, Pandena, (Rhodia between them) busily discoursing in the Myrtle Grove.
Cos.
And if you see not Women plead, and judge,
Raise, and depress, reward, and punish, carry
Things how they please, and turn the Politique dore
Upon new hindges very shortly, never
Beleeve the Oracle.

Rhod.
Could I see't 'twould prove
An Antidote against old Age, and make me
Grow younger still without Expence or Art.

Pan.
You sin past pardon Rhodia, if you doubt it.

Cos.
The plot's most firm and strong.

Pan.
The Means advis'd.

Cosm.
The carriage hitherto successefull; we
Gain daily to our side.

Rhod.
Doe they come in?

Pan.
As to a Marriage; Offer money, Plate,
Jewels, and Garments, nay the Images
Of their Male Gods.

Cosm.
The very name of Rule
Raises their Blouds, and makes 'em throw their Wealth
Away as heartily, as if they were
Young Heires, or old Philosophers.

Rhod.
Why then,
There's one care sav'd Cosmeta.

Cosm.
What's that pray?

Rhod.
I was preparing strong Preservatives
Against our Lords came home, for fear of fainting
At their Arrivall.

Pan.
They'd have smelt indeed
Of Labour, Sweat, Dust, Man, and Victory.

Cosm.
And such grosse Rustick sents, that a Court nose
Without the patience of a Stoick, could not
Have possibly endur'd them,

Rhod.
I believe
They'd have encreas'd the Bill, and some would weekly
Have dy'd of the Lords Return from the Cretan War:
What growth's your Plot of Madam?

Cosm.
O it ripens
Past expectation! See, Besides our selves
Puls out a Roll.
Eleven Court-Ladies on the Roll already;
Hyantha then sends word, that ten, or twelve
Very substantiall Countrey-Ladies have
Subscrib'd three days ago.

Pan.
My Province here,
The City-wives, swarm in, strive, and make means
Who shall command their Husbands first.

Cosm.
And then
Of Countrey Gentlewomen, and their eldest daughters,
More than can write their Names; 'Tis now past danger.

Rhod.
But, Madam, how'l you gain the men at home?

Cos.
For that brace & half of Courtiers there, Ganyctor,
Lerinus, and Iringus, they are mine,
Fast in the Net, if I but pitch it only.

Rhod.
Look where they come, pray sweare 'em presently.

Scen. II.

Ganyctor, Lerinus, Iringus.
Cosm.
I'll give 'em but my hand to kiss, and 'twill
Bind 'em as fast, as if it were the holiest
Of the best Sibyls Leaves.

Pan.
Favour your tongues;
Let's lie in Ambush here a while, and listen
What they discourse of.

Rhod.
Why of Women I warranty.

Cosm.
Peace Rhodia, peace, close sweet Pandena, close!

Irin.
Lerinus, this hath been the worst Spring that
I ever knew.

Lorin.
Faith it has', for Flora
Still challeng'd it before, but now Bellona
Hath got the time: Roses and Violets were
The fruit o'th' Season formerly, but now
Laying, and raising Sieges: Building up
And pulling down of Castles; Manning, and
Demolishing of Forts have sign'd the Months.

Gan.
Where beauteous Ladies, slumber'd, & were guarded
By the enamor'd Lizards (as if Cadmus
In envy had reserv'd some Serpents teeth
And sown 'em there) hard watchings and rough Guards
Fill and make up the field.

Cosm.
Most smoothly said,
And like a Cowardly Poet.

Irin.
There's a feare
The Women too will rise at home.

Ler.
Their fingers
Itch to be tamp'ring with the wheels o'th' State.

Gan.
'Tis very well my Lord Olyndus then
Is left at home.

Ler.
How does his Lordship now?
Still angry that his Majesty would not let
His sickness go against the Enemy?

Irin.
He finds the hardest Wars at home, he hath
Visits, and Onsets, that molest him more
Than all his griefs. He now complains of health;
The eager Ladyes do besiege him hourly,
Not out of love so much, as want of men;
Any thing now, that wears but Breeches only,
Is plotted, and projected for as much
As a new Fashion, or an Office 'bove Stairs,

Ler.
They do call this their time of Persecution,
Swear they are living Martyrs.

Gan.
Then the Punishment
Must make 'em so; I'm sure the cause will never.

Ler.
A man is striven for as eagerly
As the last loaf in a great depth of Famine.

Irin.
You won't believe what I shall tell you now;
Pandena and sweet Rhodia at this instant
Both love me, hate each other, eager Rivals;
The one enshrines her Mellons in pure Chrystall,
And as the fruit doth ripen, so her hopes
Of me doe ripen with it—

Pan.
(Monstrous fellow!)

Irin.
The other counts her Apricots, and thinks
So many kisses grow there; lays 'em naked
And open to the Sun, that it may freely
Smile on her vegetable Embraces.

Rho.
(Good! do you hear this, Madam?)

Cos.
Peace and let him on.

Irin.
The one presents me, and the other presents me
Gums, Spicknard-boxes, Fruits, and early Roses,
Figs, Mushrooms, Bulbi, and what not? I am
More reverenc'd than their Houshold-God, and taste
Their store before him still.

Cosm.
(Close yet for my sake.)

Irin.
And proud Cosmeta—

Pan.
(Nay you must hear't out too.)

Irin.
She, that, if there were Sexes 'bove the Moon,
VVould tempt a Male Idea, and seduce
A Separate Hee-Substance into Lewdness,
Hath smil'd, glanc'd, wink'd, and trod upon my toes,
Sent smooth Epistles to me, whom I let
Pass unregarded, as a suing Beauty,
And one that makes my triumph up—
[As he speaks Cosmeta and the other two Ladies approach.
Fair Ladies
You make my Triumph up in that I see you.

Cosm.
VVhat? have you been at the VVars then Captain?

Irin.
Madam
I've stood o'th' shore, and wisht well to our Fleet.

Cos.
If that be all, pray how comes so much Crest,
And scarfe, and Boot to be misplac'd on you?

Gan.
Is't not a time of VVar, dear Lady?

Pan.
You follow
The times then, though you won't the Camp.

Ler.
'Tis fit
VVe should be in the Field-fashion however.

Rho.
'Cause you intend the VVars at home perhaps.

Irin.
Troth the beleagering of you, Lady, will
Hardly deserve the name of a Siedge; you'll yeeld
So easily on the first approach.

Cosm.
You doe
Mistake her, Sir, she means, that you intend
To take great Towns at home—

Pan.
Demolish Castles,
And high-built Pyes at once—

Rho.
Gaine Sconces 'twixt
The first and second Course—

Cosm.
And in the vertue
Of the large Cretan Jar kill men at Table.

Irin.
No Lady, we do stay at home to make 'em.

Pan.
The Wars indeed 'll exhaust the Kingdom much.

Cos.
And fit tis that should some way be supply'd.

Irin.
You won't corrupt me, Madam? pray forbear.

Cos.
No, Sir, I will not do the State that harm;
For the Corruption of one Coward must
Needs be the Generation of another.

Ler.
I'll warrant th'Issue will be truly valiant.

Rho.
And how so Captain Stay-by-it?

Pan.
Madam, he
Can neither fight nor speak: I'll tell you how,
That you're a Coward, Sir, is granted: Thus then;
Either your Father was valiant, or was not.

Irin.
A very sure division, Lady, that.

Pan.
If he were valiant, and you a Coward,
'Tis your Sons course next to be valiant;
But if he were not valiant, and that
You are a Coward of a Coward, then
Your Lineall Issue must be valiant needs,
Because two Negatives make an Affirmative.

Cosm.
A most invincible Argument!

Irin.
This shall not
Serve I assure you, say what e're you will
You shall not reason me to your Bed-side.

Rho.
No, Sir.

Cos.
Not though we send you Mellons?

Pan.
Ripen'd Hopes?

Rho.
Apricocks, Figges?

Pan.
Vegetable Embraces.

Cos.
And smooth Epistles? Go you vile abusers
Of what you cannot compass; 'cause you nourish
Desires, you will discharge the sin on us.

Irin.
Ladies you're much deceiv'd: had you the Aphorismes
Of th'Art perfect, that each word should go
With a designe, that not an Eye should be
Lift up, or cast down without mystery—

Ler.
Could you force sighs, faigne passions, manage looks,
Season your jests, speak with a Manner still—

Gan.
Should you consult a Decade of Chambermaids,
And sadly advise with your Chrystall Oracles,
In which Attire your Beauties would appear
Most strong; in what contrivance your sweet Graces
Would be most fierce, and overcome Spectators,
You should not have one look to quench the fire.

Ler.
You shall be Vestals by compulsion still—

Irin.
You shall make Verses to me e're I've done;
Call me your Cælius, your Corinnus, and
Make me the Man o'th' Book in some Romance,
And after all I will not yield.

Rho.
You're got
Into a safe field of Discourse, where you
Are sure, that Modestie will not suffer us
To answer you in a direct line.

Cosm.
You were
Wont to go whining up and down, and make
Dismall Soliloquies in shady Woods—

Pan.
Discourse with Trees—

Rho.
And Dialogue with Eccho's—

Cos.
Send Messages by Birds, make discreet Thrushes
Your trusty Agents 'twixt your Loves and you—

Rho.
Which Loves you call'd Nymphs—

Cos.
When indeed they were
Milkmaids, or some such Drudges. This your rating
And prizing of your selves, and standing off,
Comes not from any bett'ring of your Judgements,
But from your Mouth's being out of taste.

Pan.
Pray y' what
Employment are you fit for?

Ler.
Ile assure you
None about you.

Cos.
Their whole Employment is
To goe Embassadors 'twixt retir'd Ladies—

Pan.
To ask how this great Ladies Physick wrought—

Rho.
Give an account o'th' vertue of her Drugs.

Cos.
Make perfect Audit of the Tale of sighs
Some little Dog did breath in his first sleep:
Goe you Reproach and Refuse of your Countrey.

Gan.
You speak most valiantly Heroick Lady.

Ler.
Pray Venus you permit the Lords to rule
The Common-wealth again, when they come home.

Pan.
Know Sir, they shall not—

Cos.
And you shall consent,
Ayd, and assist us in't in spight of you,
Willing or unwilling, all's one.

Irin.
Wee'll leave you.

Gan.
Your Company grows dangerous.

Ler.
'Tis half Treason
To hear you talk.

Pan.
Before you 'tis very safe.
Ex. Gan. Irin. Ler.
You'll never dare t'engage your selves so much
I'th' Army, as to inform the King of't.

Rho.
Come,
Let us away too.

Cos.
We will vex 'em through
All sorts of Torment, meet 'em at each Corner,
Write Satyrs, and make Libels of 'em, put 'em
In Shows, & Mock-Shows, Masques, & Plaies, present 'em
In all Dramatique Poetry: they shall
Be sung i'th Markets, wee'll not let 'em rest
'Till themselves sue to be o'th' Female Covenant.

Scen. III.

To them Eumela.
Pan.
But hold, here comes Eumela.

Cos.
Lady Secretary
Unto our future State, God give you joy.

Eum.
You bestow Offices, as City Mothers
After their Travail, do give Flowers between
Their House and Juno's Temple, to the next
They meet, or as you do your Ribbands, to
Entangle, not Reward.

Pan.
Then you are Wise
And Politique still—

Rho.
Of the Male-faction Lady?

Cos.
And you will suffer by Prescription still?
But to be serious now; what do you do?

Eum.
That which you would, if you should come to Rule:
Wake, Sleep, Rise, Dress, Eat, Visit, and Converse,
And let the State alone.

Cos.
Y'are very short.

Eum.
Indeed I am somewhat now in haste; I'm going
To meet a pair of Ladies, that would willing
Keep their own Sex, and not turn Lords.

Pan.
You mean
Florina, and Malthora, those that are
Sad now, that one day they may be in History
Under the name of Turtles.

Cos.
What Dialect may
Those Ladies grieve in? Dorick or Ionick?
Doe they make Verses yet?

Eum.
Their Manners are
A kind of Satyr upon yours; though they
Intend it not, the people read 'em so.

Rho.
'Cause they have laid aside their Jewels, and so
Blinded their Garments—

Cos.
'Cause they eat their sweet-meats
In a black Closet, they are counted faithfull,
The sole Penelope's o'th' time, the Ladies
Of the chaste Web i'th' absence of their Lords.

Eum.
Your sadnesse would be such perhaps, if you
Would take the pains to shew the Art of Mourning.

Rho.
Is there another way of grieving then?

Eum.
This is not grief, but stands to be thought grief:
They are not of such vaunting popular sorrow;
Their Tapers are not dy'd in dismall hue,
And set in Ebon Candlesticks; they wear
No sad black Sarcenet Smocks, nor do they smutch
Their women, to be serv'd by mourning Faces;
This were to grieve to Ostentation,
Not to a reall friendship.

Pan.
Is there friendship
Think you 'twixt man and wife?

Eum.
You'll say, perhaps,
You, and your Husband, have not been friends yet.

Pan.
Madam, you prophecy.

Eum.
I might be thought t'have done so,
Had I foretold a truth to come, but this
Is History already.

Cos.
If they do not this,
Nor wear the day out in a hoodwinkt room,
Where there's no living thing besides the Clock,
Nor yet take Physick to look pale, what doe they?

Eum.
They grieve themselves, their Doctor grieves not for them:
They do that in the Absence of their Lords
That you would in the Presence of your own.

Cos.
You see we look as fat, and fair as ever—

Eum.
Your Kitchin's warm, your Box, and Pencils fail not.

Pan.
—VVe are as long in dressing as before—

Eum.
And have the same Romancys read, the same
Letters brought to you, whilst y'are doing it.

Rho.
—Sleep, and take rest, as then, and altogether
Speak as much wit as we did before the wars.

Eum.
And to as little purpose.

Cos.
Fie Eumela!
That you should be so obstinate, as to hear
VVealth, Honour, Pleasure, Rule, and every good
Knock at your door, and yet not let 'em in.

Eum.
Madam, I know my Looking-glasse wo'n't shew
The altering o'th' State, when it presents
The changes of my Face, and that I cannot
Order the Kingdome, as I do my Hair.

Enter Florina and Malthora.
Pan.
Yonder's your business; Madam, there are three
Sad things arriv'd, two Ladies and a Lute.

Cos.
But shall I write you down before you go
The thirteenth in the Rowl of the Asserters
Of Female Liberty?

Eum.
If Liberty be the thing
You so much stand for, pray you give me mine;
I neither grant, nor yet deny; I will
Consider.

Cos.
VVe dismiss you, Madam, then
Unto your serious Counsell.

Eum.
Fare you well.

Exeunt Cosm. Pan. Rho.

Scen. IV.

Eumela goes to Florina and Malthora who are sate in the Grove.
Elo.
O come, Eumela, thou dost know, without thee
Our thoughts are Desarts, Rocks, and Sands, and all
That either Nature's absent from, or hath
Reserv'd unto her self alone.

Eum.
I bring you
Noise, Trouble, Tumult, and the World; but if
There were that power in my worthless presence,
That I could cast a day upon your thoughts,
You should not think of Places that are sacred
To Night, and Silence: Visits still, and Feasts
And the whole Ring and Throng of Mirth should stir
In your delighted Souls.

Mal.
Prethee Eumela
Is there no secret ancient Grove, that hath
Stood from the birth of Nature to this time,
Whose vast, high, hollow Trees seem each a Temple,
Whose paths no curious Eye hath yet found out,
Free from the Foot and Axe.

Eum.
If I could tell you
It were found out already.

Flo.
Hast thou read
Of any Mountain, whose cold frozen top
Sees Hail i'th' Bed, not yet grown round, and Snow
I'th' Fleece, not Carded yet, whose hanging weight
Archeth some still deep River, that for fear
Steals by the foot of't without noise.

Eum.
Alas!
These are the things, that some poor wretched Lover
Unpittied by his scornfull Shepherdesse
Would wish for, after that he had look'd up
Unto the Heavens, and call'd her Cruell thrice,
And vow'd to dye.

Flor.
I prethee pardon me;
I live without my self.

Eum.
But I have read
Of a tall secret Grove, where loving Winds
Breathing their sighs among the trembling Boughs,
Blow Odes, and Epods; where a murmuring Brook
Will let us see the Brother to our Sun,
And shew's another World there under water.

Mal.
Prethee let's go, and find it out, and live there.

Eum.
Our Ancient Poet Linus somewhere sings
Of some such thing.

Mal.
Thou alwaies dost deceive us;
Thou told'st us of an Eccho too, and when
Thou brought'st us to it, thou had'st put Philænis
Behind the Wall, to give us all the Answers.

Flor.
Yes, and thy bringing in my Father's Dwarf
With Bow and Wings, and Quiver at his back,
Instead of Cupid, to conveigh us Letters
Through th' Air from hence to Crete, was but a trick
To put away our sadness. But I had
Almost forgot what we came for, I prethee
Take up the Lute there, and let's hear the Ode,
That thou did'st promise us; I hope 'tis sad.

The Ode sung by Eumela.
To carve our Loves in Myrtle rinds,
And tell our Secrets to the Woods,
To send our Sighs by faithful Winds,
And trust our Tears unto the Flouds,
To call where no man hears,
And think that Rocks have Ears;
To Walke, and Rest, to Live, and Dye,
And yet not know Whence, How, or Why;
To have our Hopes with Fears still checkt,
To credit Doubts, and Truth suspect,
This, this is that we may
A Lover's Absence say.
Follies without, are Cares within;
Where Eyes do fail, there Souls begin.

Mal.
Thou art a harmless Syren fair Eumela.

Flor.
'Tis very true indeed; thou feed'st at once,
And dost correct our follyes: but wert thou
As we, thoud'st do the like.

Eum.
For Love's sake tell me
VVhy should you seek out Groves, where the bright Sun
Can make no day, although he throw upon 'em
VVhole flouds of Light, Places where Nature will
Be blind in spight of Him? VVhy should you fancy
Caves fit to write sad Revelations in?
Or why a Lover stretcht on shaggy Moss
Between two Beds of Poppey to procure
One Minut's slumber?

Flor.
These, Eumela, are not
The Journyes but Digressions of our Souls,
That being once inform'd with Love, must work,
And rather wander, than stand still. I know
There is a VVisdom to be shewn in Passions;
And there are stayd and setled griefs: I'l be
Severe unto my self, and make my Soul
Seek out a Regular Motion, towards him
VVhom it moves to, and thou shalt shortly see
Love bleed, and yet stoop to Philosophy.

Scen. V.

Olyndus and Charystus toward them.
Eum.
Madam I must away; Olyndus yonder
Is hasting towards me.

Mal.
Farwell Eumela,
Be ever happy.

Flor.
And may some good God
Cherish thy Loves, as thou dost cherish others.

Ex. Fl. & Ma.
Eum.
My Lord Olyndus, what's your bus'ness to me?

Olyn.
Vertuous Eumela, you must doe me the favour
To give this Letter into th' Princess's hands
With all the speed and secrecy you may.

Eum.
I carry with me Night, and wings my Lord.

Ex.
Cha.
O my Olyndus, were there not that thing
That we call Friend, Earth would one Desart be,
And Men Alone still, though in Company.

Exeunt.