University of Virginia Library

THE DESCRIPTION OF THE Scæne.

The first thing that presented it selfe to the sight, was a rich Ornament, that enclosed the Scæne; in the upper part of which, were great branches of Foliage growing out of leaves and huskes, with a Coronice at the top; and in the midst was placed a large Compartiment composed of Groteske worke, wherein were Harpies with wings and Lyons clawes, and their hinder parts converted into leaves and branches: over all was a broken Frontispice, wrought with scrowles and masque heads of Children; and within this a Table adorn'd with a lesser Compartiment, with this Inscription, COELVM BRITANNICVM. The two sides of this Ornament were thus ordered: First, from the ground arose a square Basement, and on the Plinth stood a great vaze of gold, richly enchased, and beautified with Sculptures of great Releine, with frutages hanging from the upper-part: At the foot of this sate two youths naked, in their naturall colours; each of these with one arme supported the Vaze; on the cover of which stood two young women in Draperies, arme in arme; the one figuring the

glory of Princes, and the other Mansuetude: their other armes bore up an Ovall, in which, to the Kings Majesty was this Imprese, A Lyon with an Imperiall Crowne on his head; the word, Animum sub pectore forti: On the other side was the like Composition, but the designe of the Figures varied; and in the Oval on the top, being borne up by Nobility. and Fecundity, was this Imprese to the Queens Majesty, A Lilly growing with branches and leaves, and three lesser Lillies springing out of the Stemme; the Word, Semper inclita Virtus: All this Ornament was heightned with Gold, and for the Invention, and various composition was the newest and most gracious that hath beene done in this place.

The Curtaine was watchet, and a pale yellow in paines, which flying up on the sudden, discovered the Scæne, representing old Arches, old Palaces, decayed wals, parts of Temples, Theaters, Basilita's and Therme, with confused heaps of broken Columnes, Bases, Coronices and Statues, lying as under-ground, and altogether resembling the ruines of some great Citie of the ancient Romans, or civiliz'd Brittaines. This strange prospect detayn'd the eyes of the Spectators sometime, when to a loud Musick Mercury descends; on the upper part of his Chariot stands a Cocke in action of crowing: his habit was a Coat of flame colour girt to him, and a white Mantle trimm'd with gold and silver; upon his head a wreath with small fals of

white Feathers, a Caduseus in his hand, and wings at his heeles: being come to the ground he dismounts, and goes up to the State.

Mercury.
From the high Senate of the gods, to You
Bright glorious Twins of Love and Majesty,
Before whose Throne three warlike Nations bend
Their willing knees, on whose Imperiall browes.
The Regall Circle prints no awfull frownes
To fright your Subjects, but whose calmer eyes
Shed joy and safety on their melting hearts
That flow with cheerefull loyall reverence,
Come my Cyllenius, Ioves Ambassadour:
Not, as of gold, to whisper amorous tales
Of wanton love, into the glowing eare
Of some choyce beauty in this numerous traine:
Those dayes are fled, the rebell flame is quench'd
In heavenly brests, the gods have sworne by Styx,
Never to tempt yeelding mortality
To loose embraces. Your exemplar life
Hath not alone transfus'd a zealous heat
Of imitation through your vertuous Court,
By whose bright blaze your Pallace is become
The envy'd patterne of this under-world,
But the aspiring flame hath kindled heaven;
Th'immortall bosomes burne with emulous fires,
Iove rivals your great vertues, Royall Sir,
And Iuno, Madam, your attractive graces,
He his wild lusts, her raging jealousies
She layes aside, and through th'Olympique hall,
As yours doth here, their great Example spreads,
And though of old, when youthfull blood conspir'd
With his new Empire, prone to heats of lust,
He acted incests, rapes, adulteries
On earthly beauties, which his raging Queene,
Swolne with revengefull fury, turn'd to beasts,
And in despight he transform'd to Stars,
Till he had fill'd the crowded Firmament
With his loose Strumpets, and their spurious race,
Where the eternall records of his shame
Shine to the world in flaming Characters;
When in the Chrystall myrrour of your reigne
He view'd himselfe, he found his loathsome staines;
And now, to expiate the infectious guilt
Of those detested luxuries, hee'll chace
Th'infamous lights from their usurped Sheare,
And drowne in the Lethæan flood, their curs'd
Both names and memories. In whose vacant rooms
First you succeed, and of the wheeling Orbe
In the most eminent and conspicuous point,
With dazeling beames, and spreading magnitude,
Shine the bright Pole-starre of this Hemispheare,
Next, by your side, in a triumphant Chaire,
And crown'd with Ariadnes Diadem,
Sits the faire Consort of your heart, and Throne;
Diffus'd about you, with that share of light
As they of vertue have deriv'd from you,
Hee'll fix this Noble traine, of either sexe;
So to the Brittish stars this lower Globe
Shall owe its light, and they alone dispence
To'th world a pure refined influence.

Enter Momus attired in a long darkish Robe, all wrought over with ponyards, Serpents tongues, eyes and eares, his beard and haire party coloured, and upon his head a wreath stucke with Feathers, and a Porcupine in the forepart.
Momus.

By your leave, Mortals. Gooden Cozen Hermes,
your pardon good my Lord Ambassadour:

I found the tables of your Armes and
Titles, in every Inne betwixt this and Olympus,
where your present expedition is registred,
your nine thousandth nine hundred ninety ninth
Legation. I cannot reach the policy why your
Master breeds so few States-men, it suits not
with his dignity that in the whole Empyræum
there should not bee a god fit to send on these
honourable errands but your selfe, who are not
yet so carefull of his honour as your owne, as
might become your quality, when you are itinerant:
the Hosts upon the high-way cry out
with open-mouth upon you for supporting pilfery
in your traine; which, though as you are
the god of petty Larcinry, you might protect,
yet you know it is directly against the new orders,
and opposes the Reformation in Diameter.

Merc.

Peace Rayler, bridle your licentious
tongue.

And let this Presence teach you modesty.

Mom.

Let it if it can; in the meane time I
will acquaint it with my condition. Know,
(gay people) that though your Poets who enjoy
by Patent a particular privilege to draw
down any of the Deities from Twelf-night till
Shrove-tuesday, at what time there is annually
a most familiar enter-course betweene the two
Courts, have as yet never invited me to these
Solemnities, yet it shall appeare by my intrusion
this night, that I am a very considerable
Person upon these occasions, and may most

properly assist at such entertainements. My
name is Momus-ap-Somnus-ap-Erebus-æp-Chaos-ap-Demorgorgon-ap-Eternity.
My Offices
and Titles are, The Supreme Theomastix,
Hupercrittique of manners, Protonotarie of
abuses, Arch-Informer, Dilator Generall, Vniversall
Calumniator, Eternall Plaintiffe, and
perpetuall Foreman of the Grand Inquest. My
privileges are an ubiquitary, circumambulatory,
speculatory, interrogatory, redargutory immunity
over all the privy lodgings, behind hangings,
doores, curtaines, through key-holes,
chinkes, windowes, about all Veneriall Lobbies,
Skonces or Redoubts, though it be to the
surprize of a perdu Page or Chambermaid, in,
and at all Courts of civill and criminall judicature,
all Counsels, Consultations, and Parlamentary
Assemblies, where though I am but a Woolsacke
god, and have no vote in the sanction of
new lawes, I have yet a Prærogative of wresting
the old to any whatsoever interpretation,
whether it be to the behoofe, or prejudice, of
Iupiter his Crowne and Dignity, for, or against
the Rights of either house of Patrician
or Plebeian gods. My naturall qualities are to
make Iove frowne, Iuno powt, Mars chafe,
Venus blush, Vulcan glow, Saturne quake; Cynthia
pale, Phæbus hide his face, and Mercury
here take his heeles. My recreations are witty
mischiefes, as when Saturne guelt his father;
the Smith caught his wife and her Bravo in a
net of Cobweb-Iron; and Hebe, through the
lubricity of the pavement tumbling over the
Halfpace, presented the Embleme of the forked
tree. and discover'd to the tann'd Ethiops the
snowie cliffs of Culabria with the Grotta of
Puteolum. But that you may arrive at the perfect
knowledge of me, by the familiar illustration
of a Bird of mine owne feather, old Peter
Aretine, who reduc'd all the Scepters and Myters
of that Age tributary to his wit, was my
Parallell; and Frank Rublais suck'd much of
my milke too; but your moderne French Hospitall
of Oratory, is meere counterfeit, an arrant
Mountebanke, for though fearing no other
fortunes than his Sciatica, hee discourse of
Kings and Queenes with as little Reverence as
of Groomes and Chamber-maids, yet he wants
their fangteeth, and Scorpions tayle; I meane
that fellow, who to adde to his stature thinks it a
greater grace to dance on his tiptoes like a Dog
in a doublet, than to walke like other men on
the soles of his feet.

Merc.
No more impertinent Trifeler, you disturbe
The great Affaire with your rude scurrilous chat:
What doth the knowledge of your abject state
Concerne Ioves solemne Message?

Mom.

Sir, by your favour, though you have
a more especiall Commission of employment
from Iupiter, and a larger entertainment from
his Exchequer, yet as a freeborne god I have
the liberty to travell at mine owne charges

without your passe or countenance Legacine;
and that it may appeare a sedulous acute of observer,
may know as much as a dull flegmatique
Ambassadour, and weares a treble key to unlocke
the mysterious Cyphers of your darke secrecies,
I will discourse the politique state of
Heaven to this trimme Audience.—
At this the Scæna changeth, and in the heaven is discovered a Spheare, with Stars placed in their severall Images; borne up by a huge naked Figure (onely a peece of Drapery hanging over his thigh) kneeling and bowing forwards, as if the great weight lying on his shoulders opprest him, upon his head a Crowne, by all which hee might easily bee knowne to be Atlas.
—You shall understand, that Iupiter upon
the inspection of I know not what vertuous
Presidents extant (as they say) here in this
Court, but as I more probably ghesse out of the
consideration of the decay of his naturall abilities,
hath before a frequent convocation of the
Superlunary Peeres in a solemne Oration recanted,
disclaymed, and utterly renounced
all the lascivious extravagancies, and riotous
enormities of his forepast licentious life,
and taken his oath on Iunos Breviary, religiously
kissing the two-leav'd Booke, never
to stretch his limbs more betwixt adulterous
sheets, and hath with patheticall remonstrances
exhorted, and under strict penalties enjoyned a
respective conformity in the severall subordinate
Deities; and because the Libertines of
Antiquity, the Ribald Poets, to perpetuate the
memory and example of their tryumphs over
chastity, to all future imitation, have in their
immortall songs celebrated the martyrdome of
those Strumpets under the persecution of the
wives, and devolved to Posterity the Pedigrees
of their whores bawds, and bastards; it is therfore
by the authority aforesaid enacted, that this
whole Army of Constellations be immediately
disbanded and casheerd, so to remove all imputation
of impiety from the Cœlestiall Spirits,
and all lustfull influences upon terrestriall bodies;
and consequently that there be an Inquisition
erected to exspunge in the Ancient, and
suppresse in the moderne and succeeding Poems
and Pamphlets, all past, present, and future mention
of those abjur'd heresies, and to take particular
notice of all ensuing incontinences, and
punish them in their high Commission Court.
Am not I in election to be a tal Statesman think
you, that can repeat a passage at a Counsell-table
thus punctually?

Merc.
I shun in vaine the importunity
With which this Snarler vexeth all the gods,
Iove cannot scape him: well, what else from
heaven?

Mom.

Heaven! Heaven is no more the
place it was; a Cloyster of Carthusians, a Monastery

of converted gods, Iove is growne
old and fearefull, apprehends a subversion of his
Empire, and doubts lest Fate should introduce a
legall succession in the legetimate heire, by repossessing
the Titanian line, and hence springs
all this innovation. We have had new orders
read in the Presence Chamber, by the Vi-President
of Parnassus, too strict to be observed
long, Monopolies are called in, sophistication
of wares punished, and rates imposed on commodities.
Injunctions are gone out to the
Nectar Brewers, for the purging of the heavenly
Beverage of a narcotique weed which
hath rendred the Idæaes confus'd in the Divine
intellects, and reducing it to the composition
used in Saturnes Reigne. Edicts are made for
the restoring of decayed house-keeping, prohibiting
the repayre of Families to the Metropolis,
but this did endanger an Amazonian mutiny,
till the females put on a more masculine resolution
of solliciting businesses in their owne
persons, and leaving their husbands at home
for stallions of hospitality. Bacchus hath commanded
all Tavernes to be shut, and no liquor
drawne after tenne at night. Cupid must goe
no more so scandalously naked, but is enjoyned
to make him breeches, though of his mothers
petticotes. Ganimede is forbidden the Bedchamber,
and must only minister in publique.
The gods must keepe no Pages, nor Groomes
of their Chamber under the age of 25. and those
provided of a competent stocke of beard.
Pan may not pipe, nor Proteus juggle, but by
especiall permission. Vulcan was brought to an
Oretenus and fined, for driving in a plate of
Iron into one of the Sunnes Chariot-wheeles,
and frost-nailing his horses upon the fifth of
November last, for breach of a penall Statute
prohibiting worke upon Holi-dayes, that being
the annuall celebration of the Gygantomachy.
In briefe, the whole state of the Hierarchy suffers
a totall reformation, especially in the poynt
of reciprocation of conjugall affection. Venus
hath confest all her adulteries, and is receiv'd to
grace by her husband, who conscious of the
great disparity betwixt her perfections and his
deformities, allowes those levities as an equall
counterpoize; but it is the prettiest spectacle
to see her stroaking with her Ivory hand his
collied cheeks, and with her snowie fingers
combing his sooty beard. Iupiter too beginnes
to learne to lead his owne wife, I left him practising
in the milky way; and there is no doubt
of an universall obedience, where the Lawgiver
himselfe in his owne person observes his degrees
so punctually; who besides to eternize
the memory of that great example of Matrimoniall
union which he derives from hence,
hath on his Bed-chamber door, and feeling, fretted
with starres in capitall Letters, engraven
the Inscription of CARLOMARIA.
This is as much I am sure as either your knowledge
or Instructions can direct you to, which
I having in a blunt round tale, without State-formality,
politique inferences, or suspected
Rhetoricall elegancies, already delivered, you
may now dexteriously proceed to the second
part of your charge, which is the raking of
yonr heavenly sparks up in the Embers, or reducing
the Etheriall lights to their primitive opacity,
and grosse darke subsistance; they are all
unrivited from the Spheare, and hang loose in
their sockets, where they but attend the waving
of your Caduce, and immediately they reinvest
their pristine shapes, and appeare before you in
their owne naturall deformities.

Merc.
Momus thou shalt prevaile, for since thy bold
Intrusion hath inverted my resolves,
I must obey necessity, and thus turne
My face, to breath the Thunders just decree
'Gainst this adulterate spheare, which first I purge
Of loathsome Monsters, and mis-shapen formes:
Downe from her azure concave, thus I charme
The Lyrnean Hydra, the rough unlick'd Beare,
The watchfull Dragon, the storme-boading Whale,
The Centaure, the horn'd Goatfish Capricorne,
The Snake-head Gorgon, and fierce Sagittar:
Divested of your gorgeous starry robes,
Fall from the circling Orbe, and e're you sucke
Fresh venome in, measure this happy earth,
Then to the Fens, Caves, Forrests, Desarts, Seas,
Fly, and resume your native qualities.

They dance in those menstrous shapes the first Antimaske of naturall deformity.
Mom.

Are not these fine companions, trim
play fellowes for the Deities? yet these and
their fellowes have made up all our conversation
for some thousands of yeares. Doe not
you faire Ladies acknowledge your selves
deeply engaged now to those Poets your servants,
that in the height of commendation
have rais'd your beauties to a parallel with such
exact proportions, or at least rank'd you in their
spruce society. Hath not the consideration of
these Inhabitants rather frighted your thoughts
utterly from the contemplation of the place?
but now that these heavenly Mansions are to be
voyd, you that shall hereafter be found unlodged
will become inexcusable; especially since
Vertue alone shall be sufficient title, fine, and
rent: yet if there be a Lady not competently
stock'd that way, shee shall not on the instant
utterly despaire, if shee carry a sufficient pawn
of handsomenesse; for however the letter of
the Law runs, Iupiter notwithstanding his Age
and present austerity, will never refuse to stamp
beauty, and make it currant with his owne Impression;
but to such as are destitute of both,
I can afford but small encouragement. Proceed
Cozen Mercury, what followes?

Merc.
Look up, and marke where the bright Zodiack
Hangs like a Belt about the brest of heaven;
On the right shoulder, like a flaming Iewell,
His shell, with nine rich Topazes adorn'd,
Lord of this Tropique, sits the skalding Crab;
He, when the Sunne gallops in full careere
His annuall race; his gastly clawes uprear'd,
Frights at the confines of the torrid Zone,
The fiery teame, and proudly stops their course,
Making a solstice, till the fierce Steeds learne
His backward paces, and so retrograde
Poste downe-hill to th'opposed Capricorne.
Thus I depose him from his laughty Throne;
Drop from the Sky, into the briny flood,
There teach thy motion to the ebbing Sea,
But let those fires that beautifi'd thy shell
Take humane shapes, and the disorder shew
Of thy regressive paces here below.

The second Antimasque is danc'd in retrograde paces, expressing obliquity in motion.
Mom.

This Crab, I confesse, did ill become
the heavens; but there is another that more
infests the Earth, and makes such a solstice in
the politer Arts and Sciences, as they have not
beene observed for many Ages to have made
any sensible advance: could you but lead the

learned squadrons with a masculine resolution
past this point of retrogradation, it were a benefit
to mankind, worthy the power of a god,
and to be payed with Altars; but that not being
the worke of this night, you may pursue
your purposes: what now succeeds?

Merc.
Vice, that unbodied, in the Appetite
Erects his Throne, hath yet, in bestiall shapes,
Branded, by Nature, with the Character
And distinct stampe of some peculiar Ill,
Mounted the Sky, and fiz'd his Trophies there:
As fawning flattery in the little Dog;
I'th bigger, churlish Murmur; Cowardize
I'th timorous Hare; Ambition in the Eagle;
Rapine and Avarice in th'adventurous Ship
That sayl'd to Colchos for the golden fleece;
Drunken distemper in the Goblet flowes;
I'th Dart and Scorpion, biting Calumny;
In Hercules and the Lyon, furious rage;
Vaine Ostentation in Cassiope;
All these I to eternall exile doome,
But to this place their Emblem'd Vices summon,
Clad in those proper Figures, by which best
Their incorporeall nature is exprest.

The third Antimasque is danc'd of these severall vices, expressing the deviation from Vertue.
Mom.

From hence forth it shall be no more
said in the Proverbe, when you would expresse
a riotous Assembly, That hell, but Heaven is
broke loose: this was an arrant Goale-delivery,
all the Prisons of your great Cities could
not have vomited more corrupt matter: but
Cozen Cylleneus, in my judgement it is not safe
that these infectious persons should wander
here to the hazard of this Iland, they threatned
lesse danger when they were nayl'd to the Firmament:
I should conceive it a very discreet
course, since they are provided of a tall vessell
of their owne ready rigg'd, to embarque them
all together in that good Ship called the Argo,
and send them to the plantation in New-England,
which hath purg'd more virulent humours
from the politique body, then Guacum
and all the West-Indian drugs have from the
naturall bodies of this Kingdome: Can you
devise how to dispose them better?

Merc.
They cannot breath this pure and temperate Ayre
Where Vertue lives, but will with hasty flight,
Mongst fogs and vapours, seeke unsound abodes,
Fly after them, from your usurped seats,
You foule remainders of that viporous brood:
Let not a Starre of luxurious race
With his loose blaze staine the skyes chrystall face.

All the Starres are quenchd, and the Spheare darkened.
Before the entry of every Antimasque, the Starres in those figures in the Spheare which they were to represent, were extinct; so as, by the end of the Antimasques in the Spheare no more Stars were seene.
Mom.

Here is a totall Ecclipse of the eighth
Spheare, which neither Booker, Allestre, nor
any of your Prognosticators, no nor their great
Master Tico were aware of; but yet in my opinion
there were some innocent, and some generous
Constellations, that might have beene
reserved for Noble uses: as the Skales and
Sword to adorne the statue of Iustice, since she
resides here on Earth onely in Picture and Effigie.
The Eagle had beene a fit present for the
Germans, in regard their Bird hath mew'd
most of her feathers lately. The Dolphin too
had beene most welcome to the French, and
then had you but clapt Perseus on his Pegasus,
brandishing his Sword, the Dragon yawning
on his backe under the horses feet, with Python's
dart through his throat, there had beene a
Divine St. George for this Nation: but since
you have improvidently shuffled them altogether,

it now rests onely that wee provide an
immediate succession, and to that purpose
I will instantly proclaime a free Election.

O yes, O yes, O yes,
By the Father of the gods,
and the King of men.

Whereas wee having observed a very commendable
practise taken into frequent use by the
Princes of these latter Ages, of perpetuating
the memory of their famous enterprizes, sieges,
battels, victories, in Picture, Sculpture, Tapistry,
Embroyderies, and other manifactures,
wherewith they have embellished their publicke
Palaces, and taken into Our more distinct
and serious consideration, the particular Christmas,
hanging of the Guard-Chamber of this
Court, wherein the Navall Victory of 88. is to
the eternall glory of this Nation exactly delineated;
and whereas We likewise out of a propheticall
imitation of this so laudable custome,
did for many thousand yeares before, adorne
and beautifie the eighth roome of Our cælestiall
Mansion, commonly called the Starre-Chamber,
with the military adventures, stratagems,
atchievements, feats and defeats, performed in
Our Owne person, whilst yet Our Standard
was erected, and Wee a Combattant in the Amorous
Warfare. It hath notwithstanding,
after mature deliberation, and long debate, held

first in our owne inscrutable bosome, and afterwards
communicated with Our Privy Councell,
seemed meet to Our Omnipotency, for
causes to Our selfe best knowne, to unfurnish
and dis-array. Our fore-said Starre-Chamber of
all those Ancient Constellations which have for
so many Ages been sufficiently notorious, and to
admit into their vacant places, such Persons
onely as shall be qualified with exemplar Vertue
and eminent Desert, there to shine in delible
Characters of glory to all Posterity, It is
therefore Out divine will and pleasure, voluntarily,
and out of Our owne free and proper
motion, meere grace and speciall favour, by
these presents to specifie and declare to all Our
loving People, that it shall be lawfull for any
Person whatsoever, that conceiveth him or her
selfe to bee really endued with any Heroicall
Vertue or transcendent Merit, worthy so high
a calling and dignity, to bring their severall
pleas and pretences before Our Right trusty and
and Welbeloved Cozen, and Councellor, Don
Mercury, and god Momus, &c. Our peculiar
Deligates for that affaire, upon whom We have
transferr'd an absolute power to conclude, and
determine without Appeale or Revocation, accordingly
as to their wisedomes it shall in such
cases appeare behovefull and expedient. Given
at Our Palace in Olympus the first day of the
first moneth, in the first yeare of the Reformation.

Plutus enters, an old man full of wrinkles, a bald head, a thin white beard, spectacles on his nose, with a buncht backe, and attir'd in a Robe of Cloath of gold.
Plutus appeares.
Merc.

Who's this appeares?

Mom.

This is a subterravean Fiend, Plutus
in this Dialect term'd Riches, or the god of
Gold; a Poyson hid by Providence in the botome
of Seas, and Navill of the Earth, from
mans discovery, where if the seeds begunne
to sprout above-ground, the excrescence was
carefully guarded by Dragons; yet at last by humane
curiosity brought to light, to their owne
destruction; this being the true Pandora's box,
whence issued all those mischiefes that now fill
the Vniverse.

Plut.
That I prevent the message the of gods
Thus with my haste, and not attend their summons;
Which ought in Iustice call me to the place
I now require of Right, is not alone
To shew the just precedence that I hold
Before all earthly, next th'immortall Powers;
But to exclude the hope of partiall Grace
In all Pretenders, who, since I descend
To equall tryall, must by my example,
Waving your favour, clayme by sole Desert.
If Vertue must inherit, shee's my slave;
I lead her captive in a golden chayne,
About the world: Shee takes her Forme and Being
From my creation; and those barren seeds
That drop from Heaven, if I not cherish them
With my distilling dewes, and fotive heat,
They know no vegetation; but expos'd
To blasting winds of freezing Poverty,
Or not shoot forth at all, or budding, wither:
Should I proclaime the daily sacrifice
Brought to my Temples by the toyling rout,
Not of the fat and gore of abject Beasts,
But humane sweat, and blood powr'd on my Altars,
I might provoke the envy of the gods.
Turne but your eyes and marke the busie world,
Climbing steepe Mountaines for the sparkling stone,
Piercing the Center for the shining Ore,
And th'Oceans bosome to rake pearly sands,
Crossing the torrid and the frozen Zones,
Midst Rocks and swallowing Gulfes, for gainful trade,
And through opposing swords, fire, murdering Canon'
Skaling the walled Townes for precious spoyles.
Plant in the passage to your heavenly seats,
These horrid dangers, and then see who dares
Advance his desperate foot; yet am I sought,
And oft in vaine, through these, and greater hazards;
I could discover how your Deities
Are for my sake sleighted, despis'd, abus'd,
Your Temples, Shrines, Altars, and Images
Vncover'd, rifled, robb'd, and disarray'd
By sacrilegious hands: yet is this treasure
To th'golden Mountaine, where I sit ador'd
With superstitious solemne rights convay'd,
And becomes sacred there, the sordid wretch
Nor daring touch the consecrated Ore,
Or with prophane hands lessen the bright heape;
But this might draw your anger downe on mortals
For rendring me the homage due to you:
Yet what is said may well expresse my power
Too great for Earth, and only fit for Heaven.
Now, for your pastime, view the naked root,
Which in the dirty earth, and base mould drown'd.
Sends forth this precious Plant, and golden fruit.
You lusty Swaines, that to your grazing flocks
Pipe amorous Roundelayes; you toyling Hinds,
That barbe the fields, and to your merry Teames
Whistle your passions; and you mining Moles,
That in the bowels of your mother-Earth
Dwell the eternall burthen of her wombe,
Cease from your labours, when Wealth bids you play,
Sing, dance, and keepe a cheerefull holy-day.

They dance the fourth Antimasque, consisting of Countrey people, musicke and measures.
Merc.
Plutus, the gods know and confesse your power,
Which feeble Vertue seldome can resist;
Stronger then Towers of brasse, or Chastity;
Iove knew you when he courted Danæ,
And Cupid weares you on that Arrowes head
That still prevailes, But the gods keepe their Throne.
To enstall Vertue, not her Enemies,
They dread thy force, which even themselves have felt,
Witnesse Mount-Ida, where the Martiall Maid,
And frowning Iuno, did to mortall eyes
Naked, for gold, their sacred bodies show,
Therefore for ever be from heaven banish'd.
But since with toyle from undiscover'd Worlds
Thou art brought hither, where thou first didst breath
The thirst of Empire, into Regall brests,
And frightedst quiet Peace from her meek Throne,
Filling the World with tumult, blood, and warre,
Follow the Camps of the contentious earth,
And be the Conqu'rers slave, but he that can
Or conquer thee, or give thee Vertuous stampe,
Shall shine in heaven a pure immortall Lampe.

Mom.

Nay stay, and take my benediction
along with you. I could, being here a Co-Iudge,
like others in my place, now that you
are condemn'd, either rayle at you, or breake
jests upon you, but I rather chuse to loose a
word of good counsell, and entreat you to bee
more carefull in your choyse of company, for
you are alwayes found either with Misers, that
not use you at all; or with fooles, that know
not how to use you well: Be not hereafter so
reserv'd and coy to men of worth and parts,
and so you shall gaine such credit, as at the next
Sessions you may bee heard with better successe.
But till you are thus reform'd, I
pronounce this positive sentence, That
wheresoever you shall chuse to abide, your
society shall adde no credit or reputation
to the party, nor your discontinuance,

or totall absence, be matter of disparagement to
any man; and whosoever shall hold a contrary
estimation of you, shall be condem'd to weare
perpetuall Motley, unlesse he recant his opinion.
Now you may voyd the Court.

Pænia enters, a woman of a pale colour, large brims of a hat upon her head, through which her haire started up like a fury, her Robe was of a darke colour full of patches, about one of her hands was tide a chaine of Iron, to which was fastned a weighty stone, which shee bore up under her arme.
Pænia enters.
Merc.
What Creature's this?

Mom.
The Antipodes to the other, they move like
Two Buckets, or as two nayles drive out one another;
If Riches depart, Poverty will enter.

Pov.
I nothing doubt (Great and Immortal Powers)
But that the place, your wisedome hath deny'd
My foe, your Iustice will conferre on me;
Since that which renders him incapable,
Proves a strong plea for me. I could pretend,
Even in these rags, a larger Soveraignty
Then gaudy Wealth in all his pompe can boast;
For marke how few they are that share the World;
The numerous Armies, and the swarming Ants
That fight and toyle for them, are all my Subjects.
They take my wages, weare my Livery:
Invention too and Wit, are both my creatures,
And the whole race of Vertue is my Off-spring;
As many mischiefes issue from my wombe,
And those as mighty, as proceed from gold.
Oft o're his Throne I wave my awfull Scepter,
And in the bowels of his state command,
When 'midst his heapes of coyne, and hils of gold,
I pine, and starve the avaritious Foole.
But I decline those titles, and lay clayme
To heaven, by right of Divine contemplation;
She is my Darling, I, in my soft lap,
Free from disturbing cares, bargaines, accounts,
Leases, Rents, Stewards, and the feare of theeves,
That vex the rich, nurse her in calme repose,
And with her, all the Vertues speculative,
Which, but with me, find no secure retreat.
For entertainment of this houre, Ile call
A race of people to this place, that live
At Natures charge, and not importune heaven
To chayne the winds up, or keepe back the stormes,
To stay the thunder, or forbid the hayle
To thresh the unreap'd eare; but to all weathers,
Both chilling frost, and scalding Sunne, expose
Their equall face. Come forth, my swarthy traine,
In this faire circle dance, and as you move.
Marke, and foretell happy events of Love.

They dance the fifth Antimasque of Gypsies.
Mom.

I cannot but wonder that your perpetuall
conversation with Poets and Philosophers
hath furnished you with no more Logick,
or that you should thinke to impose upon us so
grosse an inference, as because Plutus and you
are contrary, therefore whatsoever is denyed of
the one, must bee true of the other; as if it
should follow of necessity, because hee is not
Iupiter, you are. No, I give you to know, I
am better vers'd in cavils with the gods, then
to swallow such a fallacie, for though you two
cannot be together in one place, yet there are
many places that may be without you both, and
such is heaven, where neither of you are likely
to arrive: therefore let me advise you to marry
your selfe to Content, and beget sage Apothegmes,
and goodly morall Sentences in disprayse
of Riches, and contempt of the world.

Merc.
Thou dost presume too much, poore needy wretch,
To claime a station in the Firmament,
Because thy humble Cottage, or thy Tub
Nurses some lazie or Pedantique vertue
In the cheape Sun-shine, or by shady springs
With roots and pot-hearbs; where thy right hand,
Tearing those humane passions from the mind,
Vpon whose stocks saire blooming vertues flourish,
Degradeth Nature, and benummeth sense,
And Gorgon-like, turnes active men to stone.
Wee not require the dull society
Of your necessitated Temperance,
Or that unnaturall stupidity
That knowes nor joy nor sorrow; nor your forc'd
Falsly exalted passive Fortitude
Above the active: This low abject brood,
That fix their seats in mediocrity,
Become your servile minds; but we advance
Such vertues only as admit excesse,
Brave bounteous Acts, Regall Magnificence,
All-seeing Prudence, Magnanimity
That knowes no bound, and that Heroick vertue
For which Antiquity hath left no name,
But patternes only, such as Hercules,
Achilles, Theseus. Backe to thy loath'd cell,
And when thou seest the new enlightned Spheare,
Study to know but what those Worthies were.

Tishe, enters, her head bald behind, and one great locke before, wings at her shoulders, and in her hand a wheele, her upper parts naked, and the skirt of her Garment wrought all over with Crownes, Scepters, Bookes, and such other things as expresse both her greatest and and smallest gifts.
Mom.

See where Dame Fortune comes, you
may know her by her wheele, and that vayle
over her eys, with which she hopes like a seel'd
Pigeon to mount above the Clouds, and pearch
in the eighth Spheare: listen, she begins.

Fort.
I come not here (you gods) to plead the Right,
By which Antiquity assign'd my Deitie,
Though no peculiar station 'mongst the Stars,
Yet generall power to rule their influence,
Or boast the Title of Omnipotent,
Ascrib'd me then, by which I rival'd Iove,
Since you have cancell'd all those old records:
But confident in my good cause and merit,
Claime a succession in the vacant Orbe,
For since Astræa fled to heaven, I sit
Her Deputy on Earth, I hold her skales
And weigh mens Fates out, who have made me blind,
Because themselves want eyes to see my causes,
Call me inconstant, 'cause my workes surpasse
The shallow fathom of their human reason;
Yet here, like blinded Iustice, I dispence
With my impartiall hands, their constant lots,
And if desertlesse, impious men engrosse
My best rewards, the fault is yours, you gods,
That scant your graces to mortality,
And niggards of your good, scarce spare the world
One vertuous, for a thousand wicked men.
It is no error to conferre dignity,
But to bestow it on a vicious man;
I gave the dignity, but you made the vice,
Make you men good, and I'le make good men happy.
That Plutus is refus'd, dismayes me not,
He is my Drudge, and the externall pompe,
In which he decks the World, proceeds from me,
Not him; like Harmony, that not resides
In strings, or notes, but in the hand and voyce.
The revolutions of Empires, States,
Scepters, and Crownes, are but my game and sport,
Which as they hang on the events of Warre,
So those depend upon my turning wheele.
You warlike Squadrons, who in battels joyn'd,
Dispute the Right of Kings, which I decide,
Present the modell of that martiall frame,
By which, when Crownes are stak'd, I rule the game.

They dance the sixth Antimasque, being the representation of a Battell.
Mom.

Madam, I should censure you, pro
falso clamore, for preferring a scandalous crosbill
of recrimination against the gods, but your
blindnesse shall excuse you. Alas! what would
it advantage you, if vertue were as universall
as vice is? it would onely follow, that as the
world now exclaimes upon you for exalting
the vicious, it would then raile as fast at you for
depressing the vertuous; so they would still
keepe their tune, though you chang'd their
Ditty.

Merc.
The mists, in which future events are wrap'd,
That oft succeed beside the purposes
Of him that workes, his dull eyes not discerning
The first great cause, offer'd thy clouded shape
To his enquiring search; so in the darke
The groping world first found thy Deity,
And gave thee rule over contingencies,
Which, to the piercing eye of Providence,
Being fix'd and certaine, where past and to come,
Are alwayes present, thou dost disappeare,
Losest thy being, and art not all.
Be thou then onely a deluding Phantome,
At best a blind guide, leading blinder fooles;
Who, would they but survay their mutuall wants,
And helpe each other, there were left no roome
For thy vaine ayd. Wisedome, whose strong-built plots
Leave nought to hazard, mocks thy futile power.
Industrious labour drags thee by the locks,
Bound to his toyling Car, and not attending
Till thou dispence, reaches his owne reward.
Only the lazie sluggard yawning lyes
Before thy threshold, gaping for thy dole,
And licks the easie hand that feeds his sloath,
The shallow, rash, and unadvised man
Makes thee his stale, disburdens all the follies
Of his mis-guided actions, on thy shoulders.
Vanish from hence, and seeke those Ideots out
That thy fantasticke god-head hath allow'd,
And rule that giddy superstitious crowd.

Hedone.

Pleasure, a young woman with a
smiling face, in a light lascivious habit, adorn'd
with silver and gold, her Temples crown'd
with a Garland of Roses, and over that a Rainbow
circling her head downe to her shoulders.

Hedone enters.
Merc.

What wanton's this?

Mom.

This is the sprightly Lady Hedone, a
merry Gamester, this people call her Pleasure.

Plea.
The reasons (equall Iudges) here alleag'd
By the dismist Pretenders, all concurre
To strengthen my just title to the Spheare.
Honour, or Wealth, or the contempt of both,
Have in themselves no simple reall good,
But as they are the meanes to purchase pleasure;
The paths that lead to my delicious Palace;
They for my sake, I for mine owne am priz'd.
Beyond me nothing is, I am the Goale,
The Iourneyes end, to which the sweating world,
And wearied Nature travels. For this, the best
And wisest sect of all Philosophers,
Made me the seat of supreme happinesse.
And though some, more austere, upon my ruines
Did to the prejudice of Nature, raise
Some petty low-built vertues, 'twas because
They wanted wings to reach my soaring pitch,
Had they beene Princes borne, themselves had prov'd
Of all mankind the most luxurious.
For those delights, which to their low condition
Were obvious, they with greedy appetite
Suck'd and devour'd: from offices of State,
From cares of family, children, wife, hopes, feares
Retir'd, the churlish Cynicke in his Tub
Enjoy'd those pleasures which his tongue defam'd.
Nor am I rank'd 'mongst the superfluous goods;
My necessary offices preserve
Each single man, and propogate the kind.
Then am I universall as the light,
Or common Ayre we breath; and since I am
The generall desire of all mankind,
Civill Felicity must reside in me.
Tell me what rate my choycest pleasures beare,
When for the short delight of a poore draught
Of cheape cold water, great Lysimachus
Rendred himselfe slave to the Scythians.
Should I the curious structure of my seats,
The art and beauty of my seuerall objects,
Rehearse at large, your bounties would reserve
For every sense a proper constellation;
But I present their Persons to your eyes.
Come forth my subtle Organs of delight,
With changing figures please the curiouss eye,
And charme the care with moving Harmony.

They dance the seventh Antimasque of the five senses.
Merc.
Bewitching Syren, guilded rottennesse,
Thou hast with cunning artifice display'd
Th'enamel'd outside, and the honied verge
Of the faire cup, where deadly poyson lurks,
Within, a thousand sorrowes dance the round;
And like a shell, Paine circles thee without,
Griefe is the shadow waiting on thy steps,
Which, as thy joyes 'ginne tow'rds their West decline,
Doth to a Gyants spreading forme extend
Thy Dwarfish stature. Thou thy selfe art Paine,
Greedy, intense Desire, and the keene edge
Of thy fierce Appetite, oft strangles thee,
And cuts thy slender thread; but still the terrour
And apprehension of thy hasty end,
Mingles with Gall thy most refined sweets;
Yet thy Cyrcæan charmes transforme the world.
Captaines, that have resisted warre and death,
Nations, that over Fortune have triumph'd,
Are by thy Magicke made effeminate,
Empires, that knew no limits but the Poles,
Have in thy wanton lap melted away.
Thou wert the Author of the first excesse
That drew this reformation on the gods.
Canst thou then dreame, those Powers, that from heaven have
Banish'd th'effect, will there enthrone th'cause?
To thy voluptuous Denne, fly Witch, from hence,
There dwell, for ever drown'd in brutish sense.

Mom.

I concurre, and am growne so weary
of these tedious pleadings, as I'le packe up too
and be gone: Besides, I see a crowd of other
suitors pressing hither, I'le stop 'em, take their
petitions and preferre 'em above; and as I came
in bluntly without knocking, and no body bid
me welcome; so I'le depart as abruptly without
taking leave, and bid no body fare-well.

Merc.
These, with forc'd reasons, and strain'd arguments,
Vrge vaine pretences, whilst your Actions plead,
And with a silent importunity
Awake the drousie Iustice of the gods
To crowne your deeds with immortality.
The growing Titles of your Ancestors,
These Nations glorious Acts, joyn'd to the stocke
Of your owne Royall vertues, and the cleare
Reflexe they take from th'imitation
Of your fam'd Court, make Honours storie full,
And have to that secure fix'd state advanc'd
Both you and them, to which the labouring world,
Wading through streames of blood, sweats to aspire.
Those ancient Worthies of these famous Isles,
That long have slept, in fresh and lively shapes
Shall strait appeare, where you shall see your selfe
Circled with moderne Heroes, who shall be
In Act, what-ever elder times can boast,
Noble, or Great; as they in Prophesie
Were all but what you are. Then shall you see
The sacred hand of bright Eternity
Mould you to Stars, and fix you in the Spheare.
To you, your Royall halfe, to them shee'll joyne
Such of this traine, as with industrious steps
In the faire prints your vertuous feet have made,
Though with unequall paces, follow you.
This is decreed by Iove, which my returne
Shall see perform'd; but first behold the rude
And old Abiders here, and in them view
The point from which your full perfections grew.
You naked, antient, wild Inhabitants,
That breath'd this Ayre, and prest this flowery Earth,
Come from those shades where dwels eternall night,
And see what wonders Time hath brought to light.

Atlas, and the Spheare vanisheth, and a new Scæne appeares of mountaines, whose eminent height exceed the Clouds which past beneath them, the lower parts were wild and woody: out of this place comes forth a more grave Antimasque of Picts, the naturall Inhabitants of this Isle, ancient Scots and Irish, these dance a Perica or Martiall dance.

When this Antimasque was past, there began to arise out of the earth the top of a hill, which by little and little grew to bee a huge mountaine that covered all the Scæne; the under part of this was wild and craggy, and above somewhat more pleasant and flourishing: about the middle part of this Mountaine were seated the three kingdomes of England, Scotland, and Ireland; all richly attired in regall habits, appropriated to the severall Nations, with Crownes on their heads, and each of them bearing the ancient Armes of the kingdomes

there presented: At a distance above these sate a young man in a white embroydered robe, upon his faire haire an Olive Garland with wings at his shoulders, and holding in his hand a Cornucopia fill'd with corne and fruits, representing the Genius of these kingdomes.