University of Virginia Library

Act IIII.

Scene I.

Face
, Mammon, Dol.
O, sir, yo'are come i' the onely, finest time—

Mam.
Where's master?

Fac.
Now preparing for proiection, sir.
Your stuffe will b'all chang'd shortly.

Mam.
Into gold?

Fac.
To gold, and siluer, sir.

Mam.
Siluer, I care not for.

Fac.
Yes, sir, a little to giue beggars.

Mam.
Where's the lady?

Fac.
At hand, here. I ha' told her such braue things, o'you,
Touching your bountie and your noble spirit—

Mam.
Hast thou?

Fac.
As shee is almost in her fit to see you.
But, good sir, no diuinitie i' your conference,
For feare of putting her in rage—

Mam.
I warrant thee.

Fac.
Sixe men will not hold her downe. And, then
If the old man should heare, or see you—

Mam.
Feare not.

Fac.
The very house, sir, would runne mad. You know it
How scrupulous he is and violent,
'Gainst the least act of sinne. Physick, or Mathematiques,
Poetrie, State, or Bawdry (as I told you)
Shee will endure, and neuer startle: But
No word of controuersie.

Mam.
I am school'd, good Ulen.

Fac.
And you must praise her house, remember that,
And her nobilitie.

Mam.
Let me, alone:
No Herald, no nor Antiquarie, Lungs,
Shall doe it better. Goe.

Fac.
Why, this is yet
A kind of moderne happinesse, to haue
Dol Common for a great lady.

Mam.
Now, Epicvre,
Heighten thy selfe, talke to her, all in gold;
Raine her as many showers, as Iove did drops
Vnto his Danae: Shew the God a miser,
Compar'd with Mammon. What? the stone will do't.
Shee shall feele gold, tast gold, heare gold, sleepe gold:
Nay, we will concumbere gold. I will be puissant,
And mightie in my talke to her! Here shee comes.

Fac.
To him, Dol, suckle him. This is the noble knight,
I told your ladiship—

Mam.
Madame, with your pardon,
I kisse your vesture.

Dol.
Sir, I were vn-ciuill
If I would suffer that, my lip to you, sir.

Mam.
I hope, my lord your brother be in health, lady?

Dol.
My lord, my brother is, though I no ladie, sir.

Fac.
(Well said my Guiny-bird.)

Mam.
Right noble madame—

Fac.
(O, we shall haue most fierce idolatrie!)

Mam.
'Tis your prerogatiue.

Dol.
Rather your courtesie.

Mam.
Were there nought else t'inlarge your vertues, to me,
These answeres speake your breeding, and your bloud.

Dol.
Bloud we boast none, sir, a poore Baron's daughter.

Mam.
Poore! and gat you? Prophane not. Had your father
Slept all the happy remnant of his life
After that act, lyen but there still, and panted,
H'had done inough, to make himselfe, his issue,
And his posteritie noble.

Dol.
Sir, although
We may be said to want the guilt, and trappings,
The dresse of honor; yet we striue to keepe
The seedes, and the materialls.

Mam.
I doe see
The old ingredient, vertue, was not lost,
Nor the drug money, vs'd to make your compound.
There is a strange nobilitie, i'your eye,
This lip, that chin! Me thinks you doe resemble
One o'the Austriack princes.

Fac.
Very like,
Her father was an Irish costar-monger.

Mam.
The house of Valois, iust, had such a nose.
And such a fore-head, yet, the Medici
Of Florence boast.

Dol.
Troth, and I haue beene lik'ned
To all these Princes.

Fac.
I'll be sworne, I heard it.

Mam.
I know not how! it is not any one,
But ee'n the very choise of all their features.

Fac.
I'll in, and laugh.

Mam.
A certaine touch, or aire,
That sparkles a diuinitie, beyond
An earthly beautie!

Dol.
O, you play the courtier.

Mam.
Good lady, gi'me leaue—

Dol.
In faith, I may not,
To mock me, sir.

Mam.
To burne i'this sweet flame:
The Phœnix neuer knew a nobler death.

Dol.
Nay, now you court the courtier: and destroy
What you would build. This art, sir, i'your words,
Calls your whole faith in question.

Mam.
By my soule—

Dol.
Nay, oathes are made o'the same aire, sir.

Mam.
Nature
Neuer bestow'd vpon mortalitie,
A more vnblam'd, a more harmonious feature:
Shee play'd the step-dame in all faces, else.
Sweet madame, le'me be particular—

Dol.
Particular, sir? I pray you, know your distance.

Mam.
In no ill sense, sweet lady, but to aske
How your faire graces passe the houres? I see
Yo'are lodg'd, here, i'the house of a rare man,
An excellent Artist: but, what's that to you?

Dol.
Yes, sir. I studie here the mathematiques,
And distillation.

Mam.
O, I crie your pardon.
H'is a diuine instructer! can extract
The soules of all things, by his art; call all
The vertues, and the miracles of the Sunne,
Into a temperate fornace: teach dull nature
What her owne forces are. A man, the Emp'rour
Has courted, aboue Kelley: sent his medalls,
And chaines, t'inuite him.

Dol.
I, and for his physick, sir—

Mam.
Aboue the art Æscvlapivs,
That drew the enuy of the Thunderer!
I know all this, and more.

Dol.
Troth, I am taken, sir,
Whole, with these studies, that contemplate nature:

Mam.
It is a noble humour. But, this forme
Was not intended to so darke a vse!
Had you beene crooked, foule, of some course mould,
A cloyster had done well: but, such a feature
That might stand vp the glorie of a kingdome,
To liue recluse! is a mere solæcisme,
Though in a nunnery. It must not be.
I muse, my lord your brother will permit it!
You should spend halfe my land first, were I hee.
Do's not this diamant better, on my finger,
Then i' the quarrie?

Dol.
Yes.

Mam.
Why, you are like it.
You were created, lady, for the light!
Heare, you shall weare it; take it, the first pledge
Of what I speake: to binde you, to beleeue me.

Dol.
In chaines of adamant?

Mam.
Yes, the strongest bands.
And take a secret, too. Here, by your side,
Doth stand, this houre, the happiest man, in Europe.

Dol.
You are contented, sir?

Mam.
Nay, in true being:
The enuy of Princes, and the feare of States.

Dol.
Say you so, sir Epicvre!

Mam.
Yes, & thou shalt proue it,
Daughter of honor. I haue cast mine eye
Vpon thy forme, and I will reare this beautie,
Aboue all stiles.

Dol.
You meane no treason, sir!

Mam.
No, I will take away that iealousie.
I am the lord of the Philosophers stone,
And thou the lady.

Dol.
How sir! ha' you that?

Mam.
I am the master of the maistrie.
This day, the good old wretch, here, o' the house
Has made it for vs. Now, hee's at proiection.
Thinke therefore, thy first wish, now; let me heare it:
And it shall raine into thy lap, no shower,
But flouds of gold, whole cataracts, a deluge,
To get a nation on thee!

Dol.
You are pleas'd, sir,
To worke on the ambition of our sexe.

Mam.
I'am pleas'd, the glorie of her sexe should know,
This nooke, here, of the Friers, is no climate
For her, to liue obscurely in, to learne
Physick, and surgery, for the Constables wife
Of some odde Hundred in Essex; but come forth,
And tast the aire of palaces; eate, drinke
The toyles of Emp'ricks, and their boasted practice;
Tincture of pearle, and corrall, gold, and amber;
Be seene at feasts, and triumphs; haue it ask'd,
What miracle shee is? set all the eyes
Of court a-fire, like a burning glasse,
And worke 'hem into cinders; when the iewells
Of twentie states adorne thee; and the light
Strikes out the starres; that, when thy name is mention'd,
Queenes may looke pale: and, we but shewing our loue,
Nero's Poppæa may be lost in storie!
Thus, will we haue it.

Dol.
I could well consent, sir.
But, in a monarchy, how will this be?
The Prince will soone take notice; and both seize
You, and your stone: it being a wealth vnfit
For any priuate subiect.

Mam.
If he knew it.

Dol.
Your selfe doe boast it, sir.

Mam.
To thee, my life.

Dol.
O, but beware, sir! You may come to end
The remnant of your daies, in a loth'd prison,
By speaking of it.

Mam.
'Tis no idle feare!
Wee'll therefore goe with all, my girle, and liue
In a free state; where we will eate our mullets,
Sous'd in high-countrey wines, sup phesants egges,
And haue our cockles, boild in siluer shells,
Our shrimps to swim againe, as when they liu'd,
In a rare butter made of dolphins milke,
Whose creame do's looke like opalls: and, with these
Delicate meats, set our selues high for pleasure,
And take vs downe againe, and then renew
Our youth, and strength, with drinking the elixir,
And so enioy a perpetuitie
Of life, and lust. And, thou shalt ha' thy wardrobe,
Richer then Natures, still, to change thy selfe,
And vary oftner, for thy pride, then shee:
Or Art, her wise, and almost-equall seruant.

Fac.
Sir, you are too loud. I heare you, euery word,
Into the labaratory. Some fitter place.
The garden, or great chamber aboue. How like you her?

Mam.
Excellent! Lungs. There's for thee.

Fac.
But, doe you heare?
Good sir, beware, no mention of the Rabbines.

Mam.
We thinke not on 'hem.

Fac.
O, it is well, sir. Svbtle!

Scene II.

Face
, Svbtle, Kastril, Dame Pliant.
Dost thou not laugh?

Svb.
Yes. Are they gone?

Fac.
All's cleare.

Svb.
The widdow is come.

Fac.
And your quarrelling disciple?

Svb.
I.

Fac.
I must to my Captaine-ship againe, then.

Svb.
Stay, bring 'hem in, first.

Fac.
So I meant. What is shee?
A Bony-bell?

Svb.
I know not.

Fac.
Wee'll draw lots,
You'll stand to that?

Svb.
What else?

Fac.
O, for a suite,
To fall now, like a cortine: flap.

Svb.
To th'dore, man.

Fac.
You'll ha' the first kisse, 'cause I am not readie.

Svb.
Yes, and perhaps hit you through both the nostrils.

Fac.
Who would you speak with?

Kas.
Wher's the Captaine?

Fac.
Gone, sir,
About some businesse.

Kas.
Gone?

Fac.
Hee'll returne straight.
But master Doctor, his Lieutenant, is here.

Svb.
Come neere, my worshipfull Boy, my terræ Fili,
That is, my Boy of land; make thy approches:
Welcome, I know thy lusts, and thy desires,
And I will serue, and satisfie 'hem. Beginne,
Charge me from thence, or thence, or in this line;
Here is my center: Ground thy quarrell.

Kas.
You lie.

Svb.
How, child of wrath, and anger! the loud lie?
For what, my sodaine Boy?

Kas.
Nay, that looke you too,
I am afore-hand.

Svb.
O, this's no true Grammar,
And as ill Logick! You must render causes, child,
Your first, and second Intentions, know your canons,
And your diuisions, moodes, degrees, and differences,
Your prædicaments, substance, and accident,
Series externe, and interne, with their causes
Efficient, materiall, formall, finall,
And ha' your elements perfect—

Kas.
What is this!
The angrie tongue he talkes in?

Svb.
That false precept,
Of being afore-hand, has deceiu'd a number;
And made 'hem enter quarrells, often-times,
Before they were aware: and, afterward,
Against their wills.

Kas.
How must I doe then, sir?

Svb.
I crie this lady mercy. Shee should, first,
Haue beene saluted. I doe call you lady,
Because you are to be one, ere't be long,
He kisses her.
My soft, and buxome widdow.

Kas.
Is shee, i-faith?

Svb.
Yes, or my art is an egregious lyar.

Kas.
How know you?

Svb.
By inspection, on her fore-head,
And subtiltie of her lip, which must be tasted
He kisses her againe.
Often, to make a iudgement. 'Slight, shee melts
Like a Myrobalane! Here is, yet, a line
In riuo frontis, tells me, he is no knight.

Pli.
What is he then, sir?

Svb.
Let me see your hand.
O, your linea Fortunæ makes it plaine;
And stella, here, in monte Veneris:
But, most of all, iunctura annularis.
He is a souldier, or a man of art, lady:
But shall haue some great honour, shortly.

Pli.
Brother,
Hee's a rare man, beleeue me!

Kas.
Hold your peace.
Here comes the tother rare man. 'Saue you Captaine.

Fac.
Good master Kastril. Is this your sister?

Kas.
I, sir.
Please you to kusse her, and be proud to know her?

Fac.
I shall be proud to know you, ladie.

Pli.
Brother,
He calls me ladie, too.

Kas.
I, peace. I heard it.

Fac.
The Count is come.

Svb.
Where is he?

Fac.
At the dore.

Svb.
Why, you must entertaine him.

Fac.
What'll you doe
With these the while?

Svb.
Why, haue 'hem vp, and shew 'hem
Some fustian booke, or the darke glasse.

Fac.
'Fore god,
Shee is a delicate dab-chick! I must haue her.

Svb.
Must you? I, if your fortune will, you must.
Come sir, the Captaine will come to vs presently.
I'll ha' you to my chamber of demonstrations,
Where I'll shew you both the Grammar, and Logick,
And Rhetorick of quarrelling; my whole method,
Drawne out in tables: and my instrument,
That hath the seuerall scale vpon't, shall make you
Able to quarrell, at a strawes breadth, by Moone-light.
And, lady, I'll haue you looke in a glasse,
Some halfe an houre, but to cleare your eye-sight,
Against you see your fortune: which is greater,
Then I may iudge vpon the sodaine, trust me.

Scene III.

Face
, Svbtle, Svrly.
VVhere are you, Doctor?

Svb.
I'll come to you presently.

Fac.
I will ha'this same widdow, now I ha'seene her,
On any composition.

Svb.
What doe you say?

Fac.
Ha'you dispos'd of them?

Svb.
I ha'sent 'hem vp.

Fac.
Svbtle, in troth, I needs must haue this widdow.

Svb.
Is that the matter?

Fac.
Nay, but heare me.

Svb.
Goe to,
If you rebell once, Dol shall know it all.
Therefore, be quiet, and obey your chance.

Fac.
Nay, thou art so violent now—Doe but conceiue:
Thou art old, and canst not serue—

Svb.
Who, cannot! I?
'Slight, I will serue her with thee, for a—

Fac.
Nay,
But vnderstand: I'll gi' you composition.

Svb.
I will not treat with thee: what, sell my fortune?
'Tis better then my birth-right. Doe not murmure.
Winne her, and carrie her. If you grumble, Dol
Knowes it directly.

Fac.
Well sir, I am silent.
Will you goe helpe, to fetch in Don, in state?

Svb.
I follow you, sir: we must keepe Face in awe,
Or he will ouer-looke vs like a tyranne.
Surly like a Spaniard.
Braine of a taylor! Who comes here? Don Ion!

Svr.
Sennores, besolas manos, à vuestras mercedes.

Svb.
Would you had stoup'd a little, and kist our anos.

Fac.
Peace Svbtle.

Svb.
Stab me; I shall neuer hold, man.
He lookes in that deepe ruffe, like a head in a platter,
Seru'd in by a short cloake vpon two tressils!

Fac.
Or, what doe you say to a collar of brawne, cut downe
Beneath the souse, and wriggled with a knife?

Svb.
'Slud, he do's looke too fat to be a Spaniard.

Fac.
Perhaps some Fleming, or some Hollander got him
In D'alva's time: Count Egmonts bastard.

Svb.
Don,
Your sciruy, yellow, Madrid face is welcome.

Svr.
Gratia.

Svb.
He speakes, out of a fortification.
'Pray god, he ha' no squibs in those deepe sets.

Svr.
Por dios, Sennores, muy linda casa!

Svb.
What sayes he?

Fac.
Praises the house, I thinke,
I know no more but's action.

Svb.
Yes, the Casa,
My precious Diego, will proue faire inough,
To cossen you in. Doe you marke? you shall
Be cossened, Diego.

Fac.
Cossened, doe you see?
My worthy Donzel, cossened.

Svr.
Entiendo.

Svb.
Doe you intend it? So doe we, deare Don.
He feeles his pockets.
Haue you brought pistolets? or portagues?
My solemne Don? Dost thou feele any?

Fac.
Full.

Svb.
You shall be emptied, Don; pumped, and drawne,
Drie, as they say.

Fac.
Milked, in troth, sweet Don.

Svb.
See all the monsters; the great lyon of all, Don.

Svr.
Con licencia, se puede ver à esta Sennorà?

Svb.
What talkes he now?

Fac.
O' the Sennora.

Svb.
O, Don,
That is the lyonesse, which you shall see
Also, my Don.

Fac.
'Slid, Svbtle, how shall we doe?

Svb.
For what?

Fac.
Why, Dol's emploi'd, you know.

Svb.
That's true!
'Fore heau'n I know not: He must stay, that's all.

Fac.
Stay? That he must not by no meanes.

Svb.
No, why?

Fac.
Vnlesse you'll marre all. 'Slight, hee'll suspect it.
And then he will not pay, not halfe so well.
This is a trauell'd punque-master, and do's know
All the delayes: a notable hot raskall,
And lookes, already, rampant.

Svb.
'Sdeath, and Mammon
Must not be troubled.

Fac.
Mammon, in no case!

Svb.
What shall we doe then?

Fac.
Thinke: you must be sodaine.

Svr.
Entiendo, que la Sennora es tan hermosa, que codìcio tan
à ver la, como la bien auenturánça de mi vida.

Fac.
Mi vida? 'Slid, Svbtle, he puts me in minde o'the widow.
What dost thou say to draw her to't? ha?
And tell her, it is her fortune. All our venter
Now lies vpon't. It is but one man more,
Which on's chance to haue her: and, beside,
There is no maiden-head, to be fear'd, or lost.
What dost thou thinke on't, Svbtle?

Svb.
Who, I? Why—

Fac.
The credit of our house too is engag'd.

Svb.
You made me an offer for my share e're while.
What wilt thou gi'me, i-faith?

Fac.
O, by that light,
Ile not buy now. You know your doome to me.
E'en take your lot, obey your chance, sir; winne her,
And weare her, out for me.

Svb.
'Slight. I'll not worke her then.

Fac.
It is the common cause, therefore bethinke you.
Dol else must know it, as you said.

Svb.
I care not.

Svr.
Sennores, por que se tarda tanta?

Svb.
Faith, I am not fit, I am old.

Fac.
That's now no reason, sir.

Svr.
Puede ser, de hazer burla de mi amor.

Fac.
You heare the Don, too? By this ayre, I call.
And loose the hinges, Dol.

Svb.
A plague of hell—

Fac.
Will you then doe?

Svb.
Yo'are a terrible rogue,
Ile thinke of this: will you, sir, call the widow?

Fac.
Yes, and Ile take her too, with all her faults,
Now I doe thinke on't better.

Svb.
With all my heart, sir,
Am I discharg'd o'the lot?

Fac.
As you please.

Svb.
Hands.

Fac.
Remember now, that vpon any change,
You neuer claime her.

Svb.
Much good ioy, and health to you, sir.
Marry a whore? Fate, let me wed a witch first.

Svr.
Por estàs houra da's barbas—

Svb.
He sweares by his beard.
Dispatch, and call the brother too.

Svr.
Tiengo dùda, Sennores,
Que no me hágan alguna traycion.

Svb.
How, issue on? Yes, præsto Sennor. Please you
Enthratha the chambratha, worthy Don;
Where if it please the Fates, in your bathada,
You shall be sok'd, and strok'd, and rub'd, and rub'd:
And scrub'd, and fub'd, deare Don, before you goe.
You shall, in faith, my sciruie babioun Don:
Be curried, claw'd, and flaw'd, and taw'd, indeed.
I will the heartilier goe about it now,
And make the widdow a punke, so much the sooner,
To be reueng'd on this impetuous Face:
The quickly doing of it is the grace.

Scene IIII.

Face
, Kastril, Da. Pliant, Svbtle, Svrly.
Come ladie: I knew, the Doctor would not leaue,
Till he had found the very nick of her fortune.

Kas.
To be a Countesse, say you? A Spanish Countesse, sir.

Pli.
Why? is that better then an English Countesse?

Fac.
Better? 'Slight, make you that a question, ladie?

Kas.
Nay, shee is a foole, Captaine, you must pardon her.

Fac.
Aske from your courtier, to your innes of court-man,
To your mere millaner: they will tell you all,
Your Spanish iennet is the best horse. Your Spanish
Stoupe is the best garbe. Your Spanish beard
Is the best cut. Your Spanish ruffes are the best
Weare. Your Spanish Pauin the best daunce.
Your Spanish titillation in a gloue
The best perfume. And, for your Spanish pike,
And Spanish blade, let your poore Captaine speake.
Here comes the Doctor.

Svb.
My most honor'd ladie,
(For so I am now to stile you, hauing found
By this my scheme, you are to vnder-goe
An honorable fortune, very shortly.)
What will you say now, if some—

Fac.
I ha'told her all, sir.
And her right worshipfull brother, here, that shee shall be
A Countesse: doe not delay 'hem, sir. A Spanish Countesse.

Svb.
Still, my scarse worshipfull Captaine, you can keepe
No secret. Well, since he has told you, madame,
Doe you forgiue him, and I doe.

Kas.
Shee shall doe that, sir.
I'le looke to't, 'tis my charge.

Svb.
Well then. Nought rests
But that shee fit her loue, now, to her fortune.

Pli.
Truely, I shall neuer brooke a Spaniard.

Svb.
No?

Pli.
Neuer, sin' eighty-eight could I abide 'hem,
And that was some three yeere afore I was borne, in truth.

Svb.
Come, you must loue him, or be miserable:
Choose, which you will.

Fac.
By this good rush, perswade her,
Shee will crie straw-berries else, within this twelue-month.

Svb.
Nay, shads, and mackrell, which is worse.

Fac.
Indeed, sir?

Kas.
Gods lid, you shall loue him, or Ile kick you.

Pli.
Why?
Ile doe as you will ha' me, brother.

Kas.
Doe,
Or by this hand, I'll maull you.

Fac.
Nay, good sir,
Be not so fierce.

Svb.
No, my enraged child,
Shee will be rul'd. What, when shee comes to tast
The pleasures of a Countesse! to be courted—

Fac.
And kist, and ruffled!

Svb.
I, behind the hangings.

Fac.
And then come forth in pomp!

Svb.
And know her state!

Fac.
Of keeping all th'idolaters o'the chamber
Barer to her, then at their prayers!

Svb.
Is seru'd
Vpon the knee!

Fac.
And has her pages, huishers,
Foot-men, and coaches—

Svb.
Her sixe mares—

Fac.
Nay, eight!

Svb.
To hurry her through London, to th'Exchange,
Bet'lem, the China-houses—

Fac.
Yes, and haue
The citizens gape at her, and praise her tyres!
And my-lords goose-turd bands, that rides with her!

Kas.
Most braue! By this hand, you are not my suster,
If you refuse.

Pli.
I will not refuse, brother.

Svr.
Que es esto, Sennores, que non se venga?
Esta tardanza me mata!

Fac.
It is the Count come!
The Doctor knew he would be here, by his art.

Svb.
En gallanta Madama, Don! gallantissima!

Svr.
Por tódos los dioses, la mas acabada
Hermosura, que he visto en mi vìda!

Fac.
Is't not a gallant language, that they speake?

Kas.
An admirable language! Is't not French?

Fac.
No, Spanish, sir.

Kas.
It goes like law-French,
And that, they say, is the court-liest language.

Fac.
List, sir.

Svr.
El Sol ha perdido su lumbre, con el
Resplandor, que tràe esta dama. Valga me dios!

Fac.
He' admires your sister.

Kas.
Must not shee make curtsie?

Svb.
'Ods will, shee must goe to him, man; and kisse him!
It is the Spanish fashion, for the women
To make first court.

Fac.
'Tis true he tells you, sir:
His art knowes all.

Svr.
Por que no se acùde?

Kas.
He speakes to her, I thinke?

Fac.
That he do's sir.

Svr.
Por el amor de dios, que es esto, que se tàrda?

Kas.
Nay, see: shee will not vnderstand him! Gull.
Noddy.

Pli.
What say you brother?

Kas.
Asse, my suster,
Goe kusse him, as the cunning man would ha'you,
I'll thrust a pinne i'your buttocks else.

Fac.
O, no sir.

Svr.
Sennora mia, mi persona muy indigna esta
Alle gar à tànta Hermosura.

Fac.
Do's he not vse her brauely?

Kas.
Brauely, i-faith!

Fac.
Nay, he will vse her better.

Kas.
Doe you thinke so?

Svr.
Sennora, si sera seruida, entremus.

Kas.
Where do's he carry her?

Fac.
Into the garden, sir;
Take you no thought: I must interpret for her.

Svb.
Giue Dol the word. Come, my fierce child, aduance,
Wee'll to our quarrelling lesson againe.

Kas.
Agreed.
I loue a Spanish Boy, with all my heart.

Svb.
Nay, and by this meanes, sir, you shall be brother
To a great Count.

Kas.
I, I knew that, at first.
This match will aduance the house of the Kastrils.

Svb.
'Pray god, your sister proue but pliant.

Kas.
Why,
Her name is so: by her other husband.

Svb.
How!

Kas.
The widdow Pliant. Knew you not that?

Svb.
No faith, sir.
Yet, by erection of her figure, I gest it.
Come, let's goe practice.

Kas.
Yes, but doe you thinke, Doctor,
I e'er shall quarrell well?

Svb.
I warrant you.

Scene V.

Dol
, Mammon, Face, Svbtle:
In her fit of talking.
For , after Alexanders death—

Mam.
Good lady—

Dol.
That Perdiccas, and Antigonvs were slaine,
The two that stood, Selevc', and Ptolomee—

Mam.
Madame.

Dol.
Made vp the two legs, and the fourth Beast.
That was Gog-north, and Egypt-south: which after
Was call'd Gog Iron-leg, and South Iron-leg—

Mam.
Lady—

Dol.
And then Gog-horned. So was Egypt, too.
Then Egypt clay-leg, and Gog clay-leg—

Mam.
Sweet madame.

Dol.
And last Gog-dust, and Egypt-dust, which fall
In the last linke of the fourth chaine. And these
Be starres in story, which none see, or looke at—

Mam.
What shall I doe?

Dol.
For, as he sayes, except
We call the Rabbines, and the heathen Greekes—

Mam.
Deare lady.

Dol.
To come from Salem, and from Athens,
And teach the people of great Britaine—

Fac.
What's the matter, sir?

Dol.
To speake the tongue of Eber, and Iavan—

Mam.
O,
Sh'is in her fit.

Dol.
We shall know nothing—

Fac.
Death, sir,
We are vn-done.

Dol.
Where, then, a learned Linguist
Shall see the antient vs'd communion
Of vowels, and consonants—

Fac.
My master will heare!

Dol.
A wisedome, which Pythagoras held most high—

Mam.
Sweet honorable lady.

Dol.
To comprise
All sounds of voyces, in few markes of letters—

Fac.
Nay, you must neuer hope to lay her now.

Dol.
And so we may arriue by Talmud skill,
And profane greeke, to raise the building vp
Of Helens house, against the Ismælite,
King of Thogarma, and his Habergions,
Brimstony, blew, and fiery; and the force
Of King Abaddon, and the Beast of Cittim:
Which Rabbi David Kimchi, Onkelos,
And Aben-Ezra doe interpret Roma.

Fac.
How did you put her into't?

Man.
Alas I talk'd
They speake together.
Of a fist Monarchy I would erect,
With the Philosophers stone (by chance) and shee
Fals on the other foure, straight.

Fac.
Out of Broverton!
I told you so. 'Slid stop her mouth.

Man.
Is't best?

Fac.
She'll neuer leaue else. If the old man heare her,
We are but fœces, ashes.

Svb.
What's to doe there!

Fac.
O, we are lost. Now she heares him, she is quiet.

Mam.
Where shall I hide me?

Svb.
How! What sight is here!
Vpon Subtles entry they disperse.
Close deeds of darknesse, and that shunne the light!
Bring him againe. Who is he? What, my sonne!
O, I haue liu'd too long.

Mam.
Nay good, deare father,
There was no'vnchast purpose.

Svb.
Not? and flee me,
When I come in?

Mam.
That was my error.

Svb.
Error?
Guilt, guilt, my sonne. Giue it the right name. No maruaile,
If I found check in our great worke within,
When such affaires as these were managing!

Mam.
Why, haue you so?

Svb.
It has stood still this halfe houre:
And all the rest of our lesse workes gone back.
Where is the instrument of wickednesse,
My lewd false drudge?

Mam.
Nay, good sir, blame not him.
Beleeue me, 'twas against his will, or knowledge.
I saw her by chance.

Svb.
Will you commit more sinne,
T'excuse a varlet?

Mam.
By my hope, 'tis true, sir.

Svb.
Nay, then I wonder lesse, if you, for whom
The blessing was prepar'd, would so tempt heauen:
And loose your fortunes.

Mam.
Why, sir?

Svb.
This'll retard
The worke, a month at least.

Mam.
Why, if it doe,
What remedie? but thinke it not, good father:
Our purposes were honest.

Svb.
As they were,
So the reward will proue. How now! Aye me.
A great crack and noise within.
God, and all Saints be good to vs. What's that?

Fac.
O sir, we are defeated! all the workes
Are flowne in fume: euery glasse is burst.
Fornace, and all rent downe! as if a bolt
Of thunder had beene driuen through the house.
Retorts, Receiuers, Pellicanes, Bolt-heads,
All strooke in shiuers! Helpe, good sir! Alas,
Subtle falls downe as in a swoune.
Coldnesse, and death inuades him. Nay, sir Mammon,
Doe the faire offices of a man! You stand,
As you were readier to depart, then he.
Who's there? My lord her brother is come.

Mam.
Ha, Lungs?

One knocks.
Fac.
His coach is at the dore. Auoid his sight,
For hee's as furious, as his sister is mad.

Mam.
Alas!

Fac.
My braine is quite vn-done with the fume, sir,
I ne'er must hope to be mine owne man againe.

Mam.
Is all lost, Lungs? Will nothing be preseru'd,
Of all our cost?

Fac.
Faith, very little, sir.
A peck of coales, or so, which is cold comfort, sir.

Mam.
O my voluptuous mind! I am iustly punish'd.

Fac.
And so am I, sir.

Mam.
Cast from all my hopes—

Fac.
Nay, certainties, sir.

Mam.
By mine owne base affections.

Subtle seemes come to himselfe.
Svb.
O, the curst fruits of vice, and lust!

Mam.
Good father,
It was my sinne. Forgiue it.

Svb.
Hangs my roofe
Ouer vs still, and will not fall, ô iustice,
Vpon vs, for this wicked man!

Fac.
Nay, looke, sir,
You grieue him, now, with staying in his sight:
Good sir, the noble man will come too, and take you,
And that may breed a tragædie.

Mam.
I'll goe.

Fac.
I, and repent at home, sir. It may be,
For some good penance, you may ha'it, yet,
A hundred pound to the boxe at Bet'lem—

Mam.
Yes.

Fac.
For the restoring such as ha' their wits.

Mam.
I'll do't.

Fac.
Ile send one to you to receiue it.

Mam.
Doe.
Is no proiection left?

Fac.
All flowne, or stinks, sir.

Mam.
Will nought be sau'd, that's good for med'cine, thinkst thou?

Fac.
I cannot tell, sir. There will be, perhaps,
Something, about the scraping of the shardes,
Will cure the itch: though not your itch of mind, sir.
It shall be sau'd for you, and sent home. Good sir,
This way: for feare the lord should meet you.

Svb.
Face.

Fac.
I.

Svb.
Is he gone?

Fac.
Yes, and as heauily
As all the gold he hop'd for, were in his bloud.
Let vs be light, though.

Svb.
I, as balls, and bound
And hit our heads against the roofe for ioy:
There's so much of our care now cast away.

Fac.
Now to our Don.

Svb.
Yes, your yong widdow, by this time
Is made a Countesse, Face: Sh'has beene in trauaile
Of a yong heire for you.

Fac.
Good, sir.

Svb.
Off with your case,
And greet her kindly, as a bride-groome should,
After these common hazards.

Fac.
Very well, sir.
Will you goe fetch Don Diego off, the while?

Svb.
And fetch him ouer too, if you'll be pleas'd, sir:
Would Dol were in her place, to pick his pockets now.

Fac.
Why, you can doe it as well, if you would set to't.
I pray you proue your vertue.

Svb.
For your sake, sir.

Scene VI.

Svrly
, Da. Pliant, Svbtle, Face.
Lady, you see into what hands, you are falne;
Mongst what a nest of villaines! and how neere
Your honor was t'haue catch'd a certaine clap
(Through your credulitie) had I but beene
So punctually forward, as place, time,
And other circumstance would ha' made a man:
For yo'are a handsome woman: would yo' were wise, too.
I am a gentleman, come here disguis'd,
Onely to find the knaueries of this Citadell,
And where I might haue wrong'd your honor, and haue not,
I claime some interest in your loue. You are,
They say, a widdow, rich: and I am a batcheler,
Worth nought: Your fortunes may make me a man,
As mine ha'preseru'd you a woman. Thinke vpon it,
And whether, I haue deseru'd you, or no.

Pli.
I will, sir.

Svb.
And for these houshold-rogues, let me alone,
To treat with them.

Svb.
How doth my noble Diego?
And my deare madame, Countesse? Hath the Count
Beene courteous, lady? liberall? and open?
Donzell, me thinkes you looke melancholike,
After your coitum, and scuruy! True-ly,
I doe not like the dulnesse of your eye:
It hath a heauy cast, 'tis vpsee Dutch,
And say's you are a lumpish whore-master.
Be lighter, I will make your pockets so.

He falls to picking of them.
Svr.
Will you, Don bawd, and pick-purse? How now? Reele you?
Stand vp sir, you shall find since I am so heauy,
I'll gi' you equall weight.

Svr.
Helpe, murder!

Svr.
No, sir.
There's no such thing intended. A good cart,
And a cleane whip shall ease you of that feare.
I am the Spanish Don, that should be cossened,
Doe you see? cossened? Where's your Captayne Face?
That parcell-broker, and whole-bawd, all raskall.

Fac.
How, Svrly!

Svr.
O, make your approach, good Captaine.
I'haue found, from whence your copper rings, and spoones
Come, now, wherewith you cheate abroad in tauernes.
'Twas here, you learn'd t'anoint your boot with brimstone,
Then rub mens gold on't, for a kind of touch,
And say 'twas naught, when you had chang'd the colour,
That you might ha't for nothing? And this Doctor,
Your sooty, smoakie-bearded compeere, he
Will close you so much gold, in a bolts-head,
And, on a turne, conuay (i'the stead) another
With sublim'd Mercurie, that shall burst i'the heate,
And flye out all in fumo? Then weepes Mammon:
Then swounes his worship. Or, he is the Favstvs,
That casteth figures, and can coniure, cures
Plague, piles, and poxe, by the Ephemerides,
And holds intelligence with all the bawdes,
And midwiues of three shires? while you send in—
Captaine, (what is he gone?) dam'sells with child,
Wiues, that are barren, or, the waiting-maide
With the greene-sicknesse? Nay, sir, you must tarrie
Though he be scap't; and answere, by the eares, sir.

Scene VII.

Face
, Kastril, Svrley, Svbtle, Drvgger, Ananias, Da. Pliant, Dol.
VVhy, now's the time, if euer you will quarrell
Well (as they say) and be a true-borne child.
The Doctor, and your sister both are abus'd.

Kas.
Where is he? which is he? he is a slaue
What ere he is, and the sonne of a whore. Are you
The man, sir, I would know?

Svr.
I should be loth, sir,
To confesse so much.

Kas.
Then you lie, i'your throate.

Svr.
How?

Fac.
A very errant rogue, sir, and a cheater,
Employd here, by another coniurer,
That dos not loue the Doctor, and would crosse him
If he knew how—

Svr.
Sir, you are abus'd.

Kas.
You lie:
And 'tis no matter.

Fac.
Well said, sir. He is
The impudent'st raskall—

Svr.
You are indeed. Will you heare me, sir?

Fac.
By no meanes: Bid him be gone.

Kas.
Be gone, sir, quickly.

Svr.
This's strange! Lady, doe you informe your brother.

Fac.
There is not such a foyst, in all the towne,
The Doctor had him, presently: and findes, yet,
The Spanish Count will come, here. Beare vp, Svbtle.

Svb.
Yes, sir, he must appeare, within this houre.

Fac.
And yet this rogue, would come, in a disguise,
By the temptation of another spirit,
To trouble our art, though he could not hurt it.

Kas.
I,
I know—Away, you talke like a foolish mauther.

Svr.
Sir, all is truth, she saies.

Fac.
Doe not beleeue him, sir:
He is the lying'st Swabber! Come your wayes, sir.

Svr.
You are valiant, out of companie.

Kas.
Yes, how then, sir?

Fac.
Nay, here's an honest fellow too, that knowes him,
And all his tricks. (Make good what I say, Abel,)
This cheater would ha' cossen'd thee o' the widdow.
He owes this honest Drvgger, here, seuen pound,
He has had on him, in two-penny'orths of tabacco.

Drv.
Yes sir. And h'has damn'd himselfe, three termes, to pay mee.

Fac.
And what do's he owe for lotium?

Drv.
Thirtie shillings, sir:
And for sixe syringes.

Svr.
Hydra of villanie!

Fac.
Nay, sir, you must quarrell him out o'the house.

Kas.
I will.
Sir, if you get not out o'dores, you lie:
And you are a pimpe.

Svr.
Why, this is madnesse, sir,
Not valure in you: I must laugh at this.

Kas.
It is my humour: you are a Pimpe, and a Trig,
And an Amadis de Gaule, or a Don Qvixote.

Drv.
Or a Knight o'the curious cox-combe. Doe you see?

Ana.
Peace to the houshold.

Kas.
Ile keepe peace, for no man.

Ana.
Casting of dollers is concluded lawfull.

Kas.
Is he the Constable?

Svb.
Peace, Ananias.

Fac.
No, sir.

Kas.
Then you are an Otter, and a Shad, a Whit,
A very Tim.

Svr.
You'll heare me, sir?

Kas.
I will not.

Ana.
What is the motiue!

Svb.
Zeale, in the yong gentleman,
Against his Spanish slops—

Ana.
They are profane,
Leud, superstitious, and idolatrous breeches.

Svr.
New raskals!

Kas.
Will you be gone, sir?

Ana.
Auoid Sathan,
Thou art not of the light. That ruffe of pride,
About thy neck, betrayes thee: 'and is the same
With that, which the vncleane birds, in seuenty-seuen,
Were seene to pranke it with, on diuers coasts.
Thou look'st like Antichrist, in that leud hat.

Svr.
I must giue way.

Kas.
Be gone, sir.

Svr.
But Ile take
A course with you—

Ana.
(Depart, proud Spanish fiend)

Svr.
Captain, & Doctor—

Ana.
Child of perdition.

Kas.
Hence, sir.
Did I not quarrell brauely?

Fac.
Yes, indeed, sir.

Kas.
Nay, and I giue my mind to't, I shall do't.

Fac.
O, you must follow, sir, and threaten him tame.
Hee'll turne againe else.

Kas.
I'll re-turne him, then.

Fac.
Drvgger, this rogue preuented vs, for thee:
We' had determin'd, that thou shouldst ha' come,
In a Spanish sute, and ha' carried her so; and he
A brokerly slaue, goes, puts it on himselfe.
Hast brought the damaske?

Drv.
Yes sir.

Fac.
Thou must borrow,
A Spanish suite. Hast thou no credit with the players?

Drv.
Yes, sir, did you neuer see me play the foole?

Fac.
I know not, Nab: thou shalt, if I can helpe it.
Hieronymo's old cloake, ruffe, and hat will serue,
Subtle hath whisperd with him this while.
Ile tell thee more, when thou bringst 'hem.

Ana.
Sir, I know
The Spaniard hates the Brethren, and hath spies
Vpon their actions: and that this was one
I make no scruple. But the holy Synode
Haue beene in prayer, and meditation, for it.
And 'tis reueal'd no lesse, to them, then me,
That casting of money is most lawfull.

Svb.
True.
But here, I cannot doe it; if the house
Should chance to be suspected, all would out,
And we be lock'd vp, in the tower, for euer.
To make gold there (for th'state) neuer come out:
And, then, are you defeated.

Ana.
I will tell
This to the Elders, and the weaker Brethren,
That the whole companie of the Separation
May ioyne in humble prayer againe.

Svb.
(And fasting.)

Ana.
Yea, for some fitter place. The peace of mind
Rest with these walls.

Svb.
Thanks, courteous Ananias.

Fac.
What did he come for?

Svb.
About casting dollers,
Presently, out of hand. And so, I told him,
A Spanish minister came here to spie,
Against the faithfull—

Fac.
I conceiue. Come Svbtle,
Thou art so downe vpon the least disaster!
How wouldst tho' ha' done, if I had not helpt thee out?

Svb.
I thanke thee Face, for the angrie Boy, i-faith.

Fac.
Who would ha' lookt, it should ha' beene that raskall?
Svrly? He had dy'd his beard, and all. Well, sir,
Here's damaske come, to make you a suit.

Svb.
Where's Drvgger?

Fac.
He is gone to borrow me a Spanish habite,
Ile be the Count, now.

Svb.
But where's the widdow?

Fac.
Within, with my lords sister: Madame Dol
Is entertayning her.

Svb.
By your fauour, Face,
Now shee is honest, I will stand againe.

Fac.
You will not offer it?

Svr.
Why?

Fac.
Stand to your word,
Or—here comes Dol. She knowes—

Svb.
Yo'are tyrannous still.

Fac.
Strict for my right. How now, Dol? Hast'told her,
The Spanish Count will come?

Dol.
Yes, but another is come,
You little look'd for!

Fac.
Who's that?

Dol.
Your master:
The master of the house.

Svb.
How, Dol!

Fac.
Shee lies.
This is some trick. Come, leaue your quiblins, Dorothee.

Dol.
Looke out, and see.

Svb.
Art thou in earnest?

Dol.
'Slight,
Fortie o' the neighbours are about him, talking.

Fac.
'Tis he, by this good day.

Dol.
'Twill proue ill day,
For some on vs.

Fac.
We are vndone, and taken.

Dol.
Lost, I'am afraid.

Svb.
You said he would not come,
While there dyed one a weeke, within the liberties.

Fac.
No: 'twas within the walls.

Svb.
Was't so? Cry' you mercy:
I thought the liberties. What shall we doe now, Face?

Fac.
Be silent: not a word, if he call, or knock.
I'll into mine old shape againe, and meet him,
Of Ieremie, the butler. I'the meane time,
Doe you two pack vp all the goods, and purchase,
That we can carry i'the two trunkes. I'll keepe him
Off for to day, if I cannot longer: and then
At night, Ile ship you both away to Ratcliffe,
Where wee'll meet to morrow, and there wee'll share.
Let Mammon's brasse, and pewter keepe the cellar:
Wee'll haue another time for that. But, Dol,
'Pray thee, goe heate a little water, quickly,
Svbtle must shaue me. All my Captaines beard
Must off, to make me appeare smooth Ieremie.
You'll do't?

Svb.
Yes, Ile shaue you, as well as I can.

Fac.
And not cut my throte, but trim me?

Svb.
You shall see, sir.