University of Virginia Library

“Sweet M*rc*nd*tti, if such ladies
Could often be invoiced from Cadiz,—
Such raven locks, such sparkling eyes,
Were voted in the home supplies;
Such fairy feet, such taper fingers—
They'd make the fortune of the bringers:
Even I, who dread the name of wife,
Might order—per the good ship, F---.
'Tis pleasant, in this world of fools,
To look on Nature's finer tools,
To see the light of jetty eyes
Take Bond-street heroes by surprise;
Till the white-heat of beauty's fire
Melts down the dandy to the squire.
'Tis pleasant, when, like mother Eve's,
Spring makes her petticoat of leaves,
To see him run the homely round
Of husbands fairly in the pound.
How lightly in thy ear-drums B*ll
The names of R*s and L*n*x fall!
Not caring for the world a button,
You brew your beer, and kill your mutton;
At morn, costumed in fustian breeches,
You watch your architects of ditches;
Receive returns of hens and cocks,
Put corn and duck eggs under locks;
Look sharply to those rogues the grooms,
Embezzlers of your mops and brooms,
Prove that your talent's not mistaken
In matters relative to bacon;
Trim up the pheasant-stealing sinner,
And come exact at five to dinner.