All the talents' garland or, A few rockets let off at a celebrated ministry. Including Elijah's mantle, the Uti Possidetis, and other poems of the same author. By eminent political characters. The third edition, greatly enlarged [by E. A. Barrett] |
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THE UTI POSSIDETIS, AND STATUS QUO.
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 | All the talents' garland |  |
63
THE UTI POSSIDETIS, AND STATUS QUO.
[_]
In regard to the following admirable satire, the Editor has to
acknowledge that it was first published in the Anti-Jacobin
Review and Magazine for March, and was dated the 5th of
February. It was republished in the Appendix to vol. xxvi.
of the same Review, with explanatory and critical notes
by the Reviewer, who, in compliance with the Editor's
request, liberally gave him leave to annex the notes hereto.
However, as they might have been thought somewhat too
long for the present purpose, he refers such of his readers
as may desire the perusal to the loyal fountain-head.
[_]
In regard to the following admirable satire, the Editor has to acknowledge that it was first published in the Anti-Jacobin Review and Magazine for March, and was dated the 5th of February. It was republished in the Appendix to vol. xxvi. of the same Review, with explanatory and critical notes by the Reviewer, who, in compliance with the Editor's request, liberally gave him leave to annex the notes hereto. However, as they might have been thought somewhat too long for the present purpose, he refers such of his readers as may desire the perusal to the loyal fountain-head.
BY THE AUTHOR OF ELIJAH'S MANTLE.
I
Ye Ministers of Britain's State,Form'd of all talent, good and great,
Like Grotius vers'd in treaties;
What, though abroad ye marr'd the scene,
Tell us what 'tis at home you mean
By th' uti possidetis?
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II
Is it that you possess the storeOf merit that you had before
You took the public duty?
If that be all the praise you want,
The Opposition Bench will grant
Your possidetis uti.
III
But, if we judge by what is past,Say how your merit's to be class'd,
Where worth's, where wisdom's seat is
Made up of strange discordant parts?
None, but “the Searcher of all hearts,”
Can tell quid possidetis.
IV
Was patriot Virtue erst your guide,Or did ye list on Faction's side,
And plead her cause?—siletis!
Maidstone's and Newgate's Rolls have nam'd
The Patriot Whigs for whom ye claim'd
The uti possidetis.
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V
United now in Friendship's bands,What Principle connects your hands?
Your Union's basis show:
Is it the Treasury's Rosy Bed?
Or is it—that ye view with dread
Your wretched status quo?
VI
If on Finance you build your fame,To Pitt's account transfer your claim,
To him—its state debetis:
Last year—a woeful tale ye feign'd,
Of “wasted funds, resources drain'd,”
A bankrupt possidetis.
VII
Courted by Fox in language sweet,Could Benevent refuse to treat?
Politeness would compel him:
'Tis strange, that Peace should look so queerly
On men who fraterniz'd so dearly
At Paris, ante Bellum.
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VIII
Though favour'd Yarmouth might be coax'd,Fox was too cunning to be hoax'd—
Maitland a Scot discreet is;
From such Negotiators, say,
How could your Basis slip away,
Your uti possidetis?
IX
When Pitt's good genius bless'd the land,No fond regard for Talleyrand
Mix'd with his country's duty;
He—for his Sovereign and the Nation
Reserv'd his high Consideration,
Nor would have left—to Implication
Our possidetis uti.
X
Allied to Pitt, in early day,Grenville! the People mark'd your way,
And deem'd you—his Achates;
With him your patriot ardour fled,
But left one Maxim in its stead—
The ut possideatis.
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XI
To you (their Treasury Baal), now,Whigs, neutraliz'd with Tories, bow,
And crowd to touch your shoe-tie:
O'Connor's Friends shall praise your name,
And future Pains and Hardys claim
Their possidetis uti.
XII
The Brissotine your hand shall kiss!Spirit of Chatham! know'st thou this?
Ye Pittites! quid ridetis?
Grenvilles and Temples long ago
To British Worthies gave at Stow
The uti possidetis.
XIII
Grenville! though in your state arrayYou number Windham, Petty, Grey,
Will none of them play booty?
These Whigs are difficult to tame,
They must oppose, and scout your claim
To th'possidetis uti.
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XIV
Though pure your heart, and clean your hands,And high your rate of merit stands,
Nil valet quod meretis:
Some Brew'r, in rude but licens'd speech,
Sans proof—that merit shall impeach,
And quash your possidetis.
XV
Grey, tutor'd long in Fox's school,By mild St. Vincent taught to rule,
A loftier port will show;
Haply your Cabinet divide,
Nor deign to leave your Tory side
Their half o'th' status quo.
XVI
Yet, Howick! if thou'rt still the sameAs ere this alias grac'd thy name,
What are thy merits? tell 'em!
Sea-Statesman thou a-ground would'st be!
Land-Statesman thou art now at Sea!
Hoc statu geris Bellum.
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XVII
Nurtur'd in Malagrida's lap,Imbibing Politics with pap,
Petty!—thy worth we know:
As Solon sage in earliest youth,
A Tully, ere you shed a tooth;
This was your status quo.
XVIII
What are your state acquirements now?The nimble step,—or graceful bow,
To dancing nymphs a treat is:
Ye Tellers of the Exchequer's score!
Count on one Petty-tally more,
Dum Petty possidetis.
XIX
Windham! thy talents who can class?Shall I detail 'em, or, en masse,
With thy new levies rate 'em?
Though France kill off our vet'ran force,
Thy Bills provide a second course
To feed our Belli-statum.
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XX
Thy weather-gauge is mov'd by squalls;With Ins and Outs ascends and falls:
Now at the dog-star's heat 'tis;
Thy schemes in quick rotation twirl'd,
Would change the poles, nor leave the world
Their uti possidetis.
XXI
With Craufurd for thy bully-back,What windmills will ye next attack?
What pastry overthrow?
Pitt's quota men, and volunteers,
Stript of their jackets, hang their ears,
And take their status quo.
XXII
Cadmus sow'd serpents' teeth of old,Arm'd men sprung up, and were so bold,
No constable could quell 'em!
Try this! Red-coats like prawns or shrimps,
Arm'd at all points, shall show thy crimps
The status ante Bellum.
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XXIII
Now should Napoleon's angry hostIn Boulogne's Flota brave our coast,
No matter where our Fleet is:
A fig for gun-boats and corvettes,
Martello towers and martinets,
In posse possidetis.
XXIV
Pure as the fount from which it rose,Britain! thy stream of justice flows,
Ye vallies!—nunc cantetis.
Should party feuds pollute its source,
Or Faction interrupt its course,
Nil tanti possidetis.
XXV
Ye Bacons, Coke, and Hardwicke, say!(Juris periti of your day,
Astute in points and cases),
Was it on frothy declamation,
Or deep and close investigation,
You form'd your legal basis?
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XXVI
When Keeper Hatton held the Seals,Though he was tripping with his heels
And light fantastic toe;
Bess knew, before she gave the Mace,
That Loyalty, not less than grace,
Compos'd his status quo.
XXVII
Had Maidstone's Patriot sought his aid,He would as soon have vouch'd for Cade;
Erskine and Co.—tacetis:
'Tis strange (to judge him by the sequel)
You e'er should think his worth could equal
Your uti possidetis.
XXVIII
When Pitt the British Senate grac'd,Erskine! thy judgment was unbrac'd,
Thy tongue forgot its duty!
Now Solomon must yield to thee,
And Seymour's friend will guarantee
Your possidetis uti.
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XXIX
Since Amiens' farce amus'd the land,Doctor, hast thou improv'd thy hand
At making war or treaties?
With brother Hiley at thy back,
Which is the Statesman, which the Quack,
Quid ambo possidetis?
XXX
With these, and Ministers like these,England! canst thou be “ill at ease?”
Vain are thy fears—dispel 'em!
With all the Talent of the Nation
Focuss'd in Cab'net concentration,
Securè geris bellum.
XXXI
And you,—ye Pilots of the Realm!Trim well your sails, and mind the helm!
Your charge—a proud first rate is;
But, should you wreck the nation's hope,
O! may her anchor lend a rope,
Quod vos possideatis.
| All the talents' garland | |