 | Messrs Bat and Ball |  |
1
[In despite of many thousands]
In despite of many thousandsOf your General Unnervers,
Daddy Time, including Kickers,
Lobs, and meteoric Swervers,
All the stumps as yet are standing
Of my long-defended wicket,
And I'm here to hum a ballad
Gay with memories of Cricket.
2
TO KING CRICKET
Begotten by a County in the South;
Reared by that County; disciplined on grass,
You took the rest of England with a stump,
A bat, a ball—too solid for a lass.
You smiled among the farms and chose a crop
Of suitable servants; quarry, tanyard, mill
Were quick to spare from valley, plain, and hill
The human stuff to work your radiant will.
Reared by that County; disciplined on grass,
You took the rest of England with a stump,
A bat, a ball—too solid for a lass.
You smiled among the farms and chose a crop
Of suitable servants; quarry, tanyard, mill
Were quick to spare from valley, plain, and hill
The human stuff to work your radiant will.
Though Drake and Ralegh dared stupendous seas,
To glorify Britannia's neck with gems
As large as any stones that, flinging fire,
Gave various souls to foreign diadems,
I question if this pair of buccaneers,
At loggerheads with Spain in floating forts,
Steered bigger values homeward to our ports
Than riches given by you, Great King of Sports!
To glorify Britannia's neck with gems
As large as any stones that, flinging fire,
Gave various souls to foreign diadems,
I question if this pair of buccaneers,
At loggerheads with Spain in floating forts,
Steered bigger values homeward to our ports
Than riches given by you, Great King of Sports!
3
Historians never shall arise with wits
Alert enough to chronicle in prose
Your full success. You kept our bodies taut,
You sharpened us, you poised us on our toes;
And when the Eagle of the Rhineland screamed
For bayonets, and Khaki was the mode,
You tossed your playful weapons on the load
That creaked in mud along a Flanders road.
Alert enough to chronicle in prose
Your full success. You kept our bodies taut,
You sharpened us, you poised us on our toes;
And when the Eagle of the Rhineland screamed
For bayonets, and Khaki was the mode,
You tossed your playful weapons on the load
That creaked in mud along a Flanders road.
You spread abroad, as bothered rivers spread
To flood our earth. The westward Indian glides
Young Larwood to the palings; Hottentots
Avoid with care sub-equatorial wides;
Bewildered Turks have seen a Cockney bang
Half-volleys near the Jordan, and have known
A Major's fury when, as hard as stone,
The leather crashed against his funny-bone.
To flood our earth. The westward Indian glides
Young Larwood to the palings; Hottentots
Avoid with care sub-equatorial wides;
Bewildered Turks have seen a Cockney bang
Half-volleys near the Jordan, and have known
A Major's fury when, as hard as stone,
The leather crashed against his funny-bone.
4
This is an Empire vowed to buckskin boots
And measured creases. Merrily we found
Academies on turf, though rank and rough;
Pick friendly foes; and do our best to pound
The crimson circle to a bruised ellipse.
If Nyren may remove from shadowy bands
Of demi-gods, be sure that Nyren stands
Among the crowd, twitching his cheated hands!
And measured creases. Merrily we found
Academies on turf, though rank and rough;
Pick friendly foes; and do our best to pound
The crimson circle to a bruised ellipse.
If Nyren may remove from shadowy bands
Of demi-gods, be sure that Nyren stands
Among the crowd, twitching his cheated hands!
Thousands of girls with boyish appetite
For stolen runs invade the level greens
Reserved so long to give the rougher sex
A chance to bully leather to the screens.
They pack pavilions when the Kangaroo
And Lion grimly front their fate at Lord's,
And steal with cameras the sunburnt lads
To whose ability sweet Fortune adds
The right to sport their international pads.
For stolen runs invade the level greens
Reserved so long to give the rougher sex
A chance to bully leather to the screens.
They pack pavilions when the Kangaroo
And Lion grimly front their fate at Lord's,
And steal with cameras the sunburnt lads
To whose ability sweet Fortune adds
The right to sport their international pads.
5
Small wonder that so many lips have brushed
The foam of Barleycorn's October beer
In salutation of Your Majesty!
Small wonder that the Byegones hobble near
On sticks and crutches, noting in the cool
And tall pavilions how the youngsters tend
The Hambledonian heritage, and spend
Their muscle on a Monarch and a Friend!
The foam of Barleycorn's October beer
In salutation of Your Majesty!
Small wonder that the Byegones hobble near
On sticks and crutches, noting in the cool
And tall pavilions how the youngsters tend
The Hambledonian heritage, and spend
Their muscle on a Monarch and a Friend!
6
THE NETS
At last our Nets in early Spring
Salute the death of Winter.
The virgin ball is here to sting,
The wounded bat to splinter.
Now two-and-twenty yards of green
Perfection claim the leisure
Of those to whom this length of turf
Appears a royal measure.
So it is!
Salute the death of Winter.
The virgin ball is here to sting,
The wounded bat to splinter.
Now two-and-twenty yards of green
Perfection claim the leisure
Of those to whom this length of turf
Appears a royal measure.
So it is!
Delighted veterans, who have lived
For fifty grey Decembers,
Begin to coax a feel of youth
Along their stiffened members.
The weedless two-and-twenty yards,
With signs of heavy rolling,
Receive their praise as fine and fit
For batting and for bowling.
So they are!
For fifty grey Decembers,
Begin to coax a feel of youth
Along their stiffened members.
The weedless two-and-twenty yards,
With signs of heavy rolling,
Receive their praise as fine and fit
For batting and for bowling.
So they are!
Young England flushes in the field,
Alert, enthusiastic!
Responsive sinews stretch in him
As blithely as elastic.
His share of keen paternal blood,
As though a draught of toddy,
Is burning in the crowd of veins
That irrigate his body.
So it should!
Alert, enthusiastic!
Responsive sinews stretch in him
As blithely as elastic.
7
As though a draught of toddy,
Is burning in the crowd of veins
That irrigate his body.
So it should!
Beyond the nets a colony
Of lilac forms a shelter,
Where, hidden in a house of bloom,
A thrush sings helter-skelter.
While semi-breves of willow wood
Consort with silvery quavers
We dare to think that timber beats
A bird in granting favours.
So it does!
Of lilac forms a shelter,
Where, hidden in a house of bloom,
A thrush sings helter-skelter.
While semi-breves of willow wood
Consort with silvery quavers
We dare to think that timber beats
A bird in granting favours.
So it does!
8
LISTEN!
The clapper of a bell
Is publishing the sound
That England loves so well
In Maytime. Clear the Ground!
Is publishing the sound
That England loves so well
In Maytime. Clear the Ground!
By hundreds form a Ring
In tune with Ball and Bat,
And anywhither fling
Such care as killed a cat!
In tune with Ball and Bat,
And anywhither fling
Such care as killed a cat!
9
BACK NUMBERS
1
He's grossly fat. He puffs and gruntsWhile walking slowly down the street,
Ballooned by tarts and beer and bread,
Potatoes and superfluous meat.
His chins are several. Near his eyes—
How dulled!—a fleshly rampart lies,
And round his neck he wears a ridge
Attractive to the midge.
But, bless my soul!
How well he used to bowl—
First medium-pace, then very slow—
For Mother England half a life ago!
2
Bath-chaired, he grumbles when the windIs warm, and when the wind is cold,
And sourly scans each yard of road
In search of brat or pup to scold.
It vexes him to watch me dare
The motors in the market-square,
Because he knows that he was none
When I was half-past one.
But, bless my heart!
How well he played his part
In shires that roared to see him flog
The ball as though a disobedient dog!
10
3
He's physic-mad. Beside his bedTwo dozen threatening bottles stand,
With embrocation for his ribs
And ointment for his swollen hand.
He's happy when he telephones
To call the doctor to his bones,
Or when the coldly artful nurse
Considers he is worse.
But, bless my soul!
What lightning he could bowl
When Bonnor did his best to shock
The constitution of the Oval clock!
4
A Blenheim Orange, kept too long,Grows shrivelled, as the skin has grown
Of him whose bent and withered form
Is loved wherever it is known.
This is the Star that used to blaze
At Cover-Point! Now length of days
Permits him but to toss a mild
Half-volley to a child.
But, bless my heart!
The quivering poise! the dart!
The wristy, magical, and stern
Completeness of that punishing Return!
11
CLASSIC
Look at him!
Six feet one,
Nervously taut,
Aching to do
All that he ought.
Six feet one,
Nervously taut,
Aching to do
All that he ought.
Look at him!
Flannelled fire
Burning the loud
Ranks of a great
Cricketing crowd.
Flannelled fire
Burning the loud
Ranks of a great
Cricketing crowd.
Look at him!
Fathered well,
Driven by blood
Redder than Time
Lent to a Studd.
Fathered well,
Driven by blood
Redder than Time
Lent to a Studd.
Look at him!
Never a lad
History knows
Ran as he runs,
Threw as he throws.
Never a lad
History knows
Ran as he runs,
Threw as he throws.
12
URGENT
(April, 1926)
Jupiter Pluvius, icy pelter
Scattering cricketers helter-skelter,
Have you the niggardly heart to damp
Athletic England's national gamp?
Preserve from hail and flying fire
That spread of turf in the midland shire
Honoured to-day above the rest
As the favoured field of the Opening Test.
Scattering cricketers helter-skelter,
Have you the niggardly heart to damp
Athletic England's national gamp?
Preserve from hail and flying fire
That spread of turf in the midland shire
Honoured to-day above the rest
As the favoured field of the Opening Test.
Jupiter Pluvius, can you wonder
Collins and Carr are weary of thunder?
Sad will it be if a Team that comes
Twelve thousand miles shall twiddle its thumbs
Instead of fronting noble Fate
In league with umpires, turf, and Tate;
Burning to dare the changeable odds
Of a flannelled war with our demi-gods.
Collins and Carr are weary of thunder?
Sad will it be if a Team that comes
Twelve thousand miles shall twiddle its thumbs
Instead of fronting noble Fate
In league with umpires, turf, and Tate;
Burning to dare the changeable odds
Of a flannelled war with our demi-gods.
Jupiter Pluvius, cloudy master,
Patron of ducks and damp disaster,
Little we beg but a sterling proof
Of heroes under a radiant roof!
Permit the sun to show his flame
Amid such blue as the Foremost Game
Rightly needs when the Southern Cross
And the Star of England settle the Toss!
Patron of ducks and damp disaster,
Little we beg but a sterling proof
Of heroes under a radiant roof!
13
Amid such blue as the Foremost Game
Rightly needs when the Southern Cross
And the Star of England settle the Toss!
Jupiter Pluvius, icy pelter
Scattering cricketers helter-skelter,
Buckets of rain were never meant
To spoil this fight at the Bridge of Trent.
Withhold for less imperial days
The talkative thunder! Golden rays,
Freckles, and puggarees are best
When the Two-and-Twenty tackle the Test!
Scattering cricketers helter-skelter,
Buckets of rain were never meant
To spoil this fight at the Bridge of Trent.
Withhold for less imperial days
The talkative thunder! Golden rays,
Freckles, and puggarees are best
When the Two-and-Twenty tackle the Test!
14
A STRIKE
(April, 1926)
While at Chequers in the Chilterns,
Or in Downing's famous street,
Ministerial brains are solving
Crisis with the help of peat,
Let me join the thousands careless
In respect of coke and coal,
Having paid to watch Eleven
Plus Eleven bat and bowl:
Twenty-two heroic Strikers,
Off the Dole!
Or in Downing's famous street,
Ministerial brains are solving
Crisis with the help of peat,
Let me join the thousands careless
In respect of coke and coal,
Having paid to watch Eleven
Plus Eleven bat and bowl:
Twenty-two heroic Strikers,
Off the Dole!
Warmed by beams as truly brilliant
As the flood of light that shone
When the god in love with Leda
Floated falsely like a swan,
May the air be quick with freckles
For the faces round the Ring,
Bronzing all who watch Elevens
Fit for Homer's self to sing:
Twenty-two determined Strikers,
Each a King!
As the flood of light that shone
When the god in love with Leda
Floated falsely like a swan,
May the air be quick with freckles
For the faces round the Ring,
Bronzing all who watch Elevens
Fit for Homer's self to sing:
Twenty-two determined Strikers,
Each a King!
Since the pads are buckled neatly
On the nimble legs of Hobbs,
No one cares a tinker's byword
For the Statesman and his jobs.
Who has time for Men and Owners
Busy with their Ifs and Buts
Ending in a sudden shortage
Of convenient baker's nuts,
Now that Two-and-Twenty offer
Hooks and Cuts?
On the nimble legs of Hobbs,
No one cares a tinker's byword
For the Statesman and his jobs.
15
Busy with their Ifs and Buts
Ending in a sudden shortage
Of convenient baker's nuts,
Now that Two-and-Twenty offer
Hooks and Cuts?
Bored by Capital and Labour,
Conference, snarling, venom, tricks,
England gaily thumps the Crisis
Over Cover-Point for Six!
Though at Chequers Stanley Baldwin's
Leg-before again to Coal,
Here, in Nottingham, the Captains
Toss a florin, bat or bowl:
Two imperialistic Strikers,
Off the Dole!
Conference, snarling, venom, tricks,
England gaily thumps the Crisis
Over Cover-Point for Six!
Though at Chequers Stanley Baldwin's
Leg-before again to Coal,
Here, in Nottingham, the Captains
Toss a florin, bat or bowl:
Two imperialistic Strikers,
Off the Dole!
16
THE LINER
With a frank and flannelled load
She is cruising by a road
That is green and grey and white
Till the stars refuse the night.
Lean and brown ambassadors,
Charged with Sixes, Fives, and Fours,
Fret to think of holiday
Shadowed by a long delay.
Won't you swim on guard beside them,
Daddy Neptune,
All the way?
She is cruising by a road
That is green and grey and white
Till the stars refuse the night.
Lean and brown ambassadors,
Charged with Sixes, Fives, and Fours,
Fret to think of holiday
Shadowed by a long delay.
Won't you swim on guard beside them,
Daddy Neptune,
All the way?
She is grinding on her breast
Hills of ocean, crest by crest,
Fearful neither of the flash
Shot by lightning nor the crash
Dear to Thunder when his proud
Hurly-burly daunts the cloud
Hanging livid half a day
Over furious flights of spray.
Dare the trough and sprint beside her,
Daddy Neptune,
All the way!
Hills of ocean, crest by crest,
Fearful neither of the flash
Shot by lightning nor the crash
Dear to Thunder when his proud
Hurly-burly daunts the cloud
Hanging livid half a day
Over furious flights of spray.
Dare the trough and sprint beside her,
Daddy Neptune,
All the way!
17
What if bars of southern gold
Quiver in the cumbered hold?
What if opals wait to keep
London Loveliness from sleep?
Heroes, trained for what is worth
All the shining stones on earth,
Dream of English grass in May
Swept and rolled for holiday.
Condescend to float beside them,
Daddy Neptune,
All the way!
Quiver in the cumbered hold?
What if opals wait to keep
London Loveliness from sleep?
Heroes, trained for what is worth
All the shining stones on earth,
Dream of English grass in May
Swept and rolled for holiday.
Condescend to float beside them,
Daddy Neptune,
All the way!
18
THORNS
I was foolish to be sitting,
In the hope of lusty hitting,
While a pair of dally-dillers—
Hard at work as Cricket-killers—
Crept along from Ten to Twenty
Though receiving there in plenty
Just the stuff that gives a Smiter
Heart to be the Ring's Delighter.
In the hope of lusty hitting,
While a pair of dally-dillers—
Hard at work as Cricket-killers—
Crept along from Ten to Twenty
Though receiving there in plenty
Just the stuff that gives a Smiter
Heart to be the Ring's Delighter.
I was foolish to be willing
Thus to sacrifice a shilling
For a dozen jerky dozes
While a Battle of the Roses,
With its dreary set of Singles,
And its total lack of tingles,
Made me dream of mothers sitting
In a garden at their knitting.
Thus to sacrifice a shilling
For a dozen jerky dozes
While a Battle of the Roses,
With its dreary set of Singles,
And its total lack of tingles,
Made me dream of mothers sitting
In a garden at their knitting.
19
UNLIMITED
Parochial minds are prone to think
This earth of ours the only planet
Allowed to carry on its crust
Some creatures made of fire and dust
To woman it and man it;
But I, for one, am bold enough
To urge that Wisdom did not mean us
Alone to practise flannelled sport.
Perhaps a Test is being fought
This very day on Venus.
This earth of ours the only planet
Allowed to carry on its crust
Some creatures made of fire and dust
To woman it and man it;
But I, for one, am bold enough
To urge that Wisdom did not mean us
Alone to practise flannelled sport.
Perhaps a Test is being fought
This very day on Venus.
I won't believe that any world
Resembling ours in age and pattern
Is short of swift and sinewy lads,
Although I grant that Cricket pads
Have not appeared on Saturn.
Undoubtedly, when Time has cooled
The pitches there, developed rollers,
Designed the crease and ball (and gnats),
Those playing-fields will swarm with Bats
To thump Saturnian bowlers.
Resembling ours in age and pattern
Is short of swift and sinewy lads,
Although I grant that Cricket pads
Have not appeared on Saturn.
Undoubtedly, when Time has cooled
The pitches there, developed rollers,
Designed the crease and ball (and gnats),
Those playing-fields will swarm with Bats
To thump Saturnian bowlers.
When Summer blesses, each in turn,
The Martian hemispheres, and urges
The Gloved and Padded so to smite
That thousands bubble with delight
Around the grassy verges,
Be positive their sport is not
Far other than the game we started
Where lads ran clumsily to joy
In ploughland boots and corduroy,
Big-shouldered, Cricket-hearted!
The Martian hemispheres, and urges
The Gloved and Padded so to smite
That thousands bubble with delight
Around the grassy verges,
20
Far other than the game we started
Where lads ran clumsily to joy
In ploughland boots and corduroy,
Big-shouldered, Cricket-hearted!
How many Hambledons aloft
Revolve around their suns in glory
With ancient memories that mix
The firstborn Wide, Half-Volley, Six,
And Wrangle in their story!
The spark of Cricket had to glow
On various worlds, with breath to fan it,
Before our Daisy-Cutters, Lobs,
And Rearers met the earliest Hobbs
That ever graced our planet.
Revolve around their suns in glory
With ancient memories that mix
The firstborn Wide, Half-Volley, Six,
And Wrangle in their story!
The spark of Cricket had to glow
On various worlds, with breath to fan it,
Before our Daisy-Cutters, Lobs,
And Rearers met the earliest Hobbs
That ever graced our planet.
21
THE TEASER
Larry had lingered at the Nets
Instead of gathering violets
Along a stream with Rose.
Next morning, near a draper's shop,
A war began. She wouldn't stop
From turning up her nose.
Instead of gathering violets
Along a stream with Rose.
Next morning, near a draper's shop,
A war began. She wouldn't stop
From turning up her nose.
He rashly stated that the dress
A model wore was loveliness
In perfect tune with hers,
She sniffed, and told him she was tired
Of any costume he admired,
And any set of furs.
A model wore was loveliness
In perfect tune with hers,
She sniffed, and told him she was tired
Of any costume he admired,
And any set of furs.
Remembering she had vowed to wear,
For love of him, the mass of hair
That burnt upon her nape,
And yet had sacrificed the bunch
Between a breakfast and a lunch,
And boasted of the rape,
For love of him, the mass of hair
That burnt upon her nape,
And yet had sacrificed the bunch
Between a breakfast and a lunch,
And boasted of the rape,
He questioned, “What's the usual thing
To do with an engagement ring
When love has gone? Decide.
To build a marriage on pretence
Would show a lack of commonsense
In bridegroom and in bride.”
To do with an engagement ring
When love has gone? Decide.
To build a marriage on pretence
Would show a lack of commonsense
In bridegroom and in bride.”
22
Then Rose sent down a Teaser. This
Was frowning, dimple, sob, and kiss
So perfectly controlled
That pace and length and spin unnerved
The flurried Bat. The Teaser swerved,
And Larry's heart was bowled.
Was frowning, dimple, sob, and kiss
So perfectly controlled
That pace and length and spin unnerved
The flurried Bat. The Teaser swerved,
And Larry's heart was bowled.
23
REMEMBERED
This is a Rhyme
Of Once-upon-a-Time.
Of Once-upon-a-Time.
My father would have humbled me
Across his too-familiar knee
If I had given my vote for Tea,
That fluid bane of Cricket.
Across his too-familiar knee
If I had given my vote for Tea,
That fluid bane of Cricket.
A creamed and sugared afternoon,
With woman's saucer, cup, and spoon,
Meant tragedy; and meant it soon
For England's perfect pastime!
With woman's saucer, cup, and spoon,
Meant tragedy; and meant it soon
For England's perfect pastime!
No golden lads, quoth he, would shrink
From leather-worship thus, and slink
Pavilion-ward, like cats, to drink
The parlour's feeble potion;
From leather-worship thus, and slink
Pavilion-ward, like cats, to drink
The parlour's feeble potion;
Nor yet, if warm with proper flame,
Would dare to add, becoming tame,
A single cushion to the game
Inherited from Glory.
Would dare to add, becoming tame,
A single cushion to the game
Inherited from Glory.
I bid you keep it bright and stern,
That, when your veins no longer burn
With blood sufficient, you may turn
In honour from the creases,
That, when your veins no longer burn
With blood sufficient, you may turn
In honour from the creases,
24
And, represented by a son
On fire to do as you have done,
May love the Game till Death has won
At last your broken wicket.
On fire to do as you have done,
May love the Game till Death has won
At last your broken wicket.
This is a Rhyme
Of Once-upon-a-Time.
Of Once-upon-a-Time.
25
THE OPENING PAIR
Snowdrop, whiter than a pad,
Crocus, yellower than a bat,
What a big first-wicket stand,
On a yard of lumpy land,
You are making! Bowler Wet
And Bowlers Ice and Snow you fret,
Remaining set
Yet.
Crocus, yellower than a bat,
What a big first-wicket stand,
On a yard of lumpy land,
You are making! Bowler Wet
And Bowlers Ice and Snow you fret,
Remaining set
Yet.
Snowdrop, turning rather brown,
Crocus, wearily fallen flat,
What a fine example you,
On a wicket far from true,
Gave to mortals! None of us
Is moved by quiet impetus
And lack of fuss
Thus.
Crocus, wearily fallen flat,
What a fine example you,
On a wicket far from true,
Gave to mortals! None of us
Is moved by quiet impetus
And lack of fuss
Thus.
26
THE BALL
What punishment it suffers,
Even from duffers!
How many millions
Have seen it punch pavilions,
Saluted by the choral
Remonstrances of floral
Young Venuses in fixes
Because of dropping Sixes!
If, bent on Constantining,
The Western Wizard pounces
With all his sinewy ounces
Upon the welcome folly
Of a superfine half-volley,
How furiously it fizzes
On its errand while it whizzes
As a ray for Prince and coster
From the dazzling Star of Gloucester!
Even from duffers!
How many millions
Have seen it punch pavilions,
Saluted by the choral
Remonstrances of floral
Young Venuses in fixes
Because of dropping Sixes!
If, bent on Constantining,
The Western Wizard pounces
With all his sinewy ounces
Upon the welcome folly
Of a superfine half-volley,
How furiously it fizzes
On its errand while it whizzes
As a ray for Prince and coster
From the dazzling Star of Gloucester!
How often in the glory
Of the freckling sun a story,
Fit to live in Wisden's pages
Through a century of Ages,
Telegraphs to sons and Paters,
Earls, policemen, Dukes, and waiters,
Curate, poet, busman, shunter,
(Blending all the grades and driving
Pulses to a jig!) the thriving
Figures gathered by the pliant
Muscle of a Cricket giant
Mingling power and pluck and passion
In the right athletic fashion!
Of the freckling sun a story,
Fit to live in Wisden's pages
Through a century of Ages,
Telegraphs to sons and Paters,
Earls, policemen, Dukes, and waiters,
Curate, poet, busman, shunter,
(Blending all the grades and driving
Pulses to a jig!) the thriving
27
Muscle of a Cricket giant
Mingling power and pluck and passion
In the right athletic fashion!
What punishment it suffers,
Even from duffers!
How many millions
Have seen it jump pavilions!
Discarded hats, expressing
A sort of general blessing,
Salute in noble weather
The bird of crimson leather
That, roosting for a second
On a balustrade, is reckoned
Six for him whose muscle gave it
Flight and force enough to save it
From appearing as a Fourer
In the bible of the Scorer.
Even from duffers!
How many millions
Have seen it jump pavilions!
Discarded hats, expressing
A sort of general blessing,
Salute in noble weather
The bird of crimson leather
That, roosting for a second
On a balustrade, is reckoned
Six for him whose muscle gave it
Flight and force enough to save it
From appearing as a Fourer
In the bible of the Scorer.
It is good to spend a sunny
Afternoon—for little money—
While the fielding is a wonder
Greeted by the public thunder;
Good to watch so brave a spender
Of his pith as Percy Fender
Flogging, in a feverish hurry,
Boundaries for the sake of Surrey;
Good to watch the heroes reaping
Records fit for Wisden's keeping,
Wellnigh holy, in the pages
Vivid with the various stages
Used by England till she rounded
Cricket to a joy, and founded
What, though generations perish,
Other broods shall run to cherish
Just as long as Time assures them
Breath, and merrily endures them!
Afternoon—for little money—
While the fielding is a wonder
Greeted by the public thunder;
Good to watch so brave a spender
Of his pith as Percy Fender
Flogging, in a feverish hurry,
Boundaries for the sake of Surrey;
Good to watch the heroes reaping
28
Wellnigh holy, in the pages
Vivid with the various stages
Used by England till she rounded
Cricket to a joy, and founded
What, though generations perish,
Other broods shall run to cherish
Just as long as Time assures them
Breath, and merrily endures them!
29
TESTING
Under my feet
Middlesex turf
Warm in the heat;
Over my head
Measureless blue
Perfectly spread.
Middlesex turf
Warm in the heat;
Over my head
Measureless blue
Perfectly spread.
What of the Toss?
Whose is the gain,
Whose is the loss?
Many a hat
Signals aloft:
England to bat!
Whose is the gain,
Whose is the loss?
Many a hat
Signals aloft:
England to bat!
True to the clock,
Southerners, come
Forth in a flock!
Now, on the best
Pitch in the world,
Open the Test!
Southerners, come
Forth in a flock!
Now, on the best
Pitch in the world,
Open the Test!
Berry-brown, lean,
Swift as a buck,
Startle the Green!
First with the Ball,
Then with the Bat,
Fever us all!
Swift as a buck,
Startle the Green!
First with the Ball,
Then with the Bat,
Fever us all!
30
Under the high
Acres of blue
Hot in the sky
Gallop, you fit
Sons of the Star
Hambledon lit!
Acres of blue
Hot in the sky
Gallop, you fit
Sons of the Star
Hambledon lit!
Victory's sweet.
Yet if you crush
Lord's with defeat,
Then will you hear
How, in the gloom,
England can cheer!
Yet if you crush
Lord's with defeat,
Then will you hear
How, in the gloom,
England can cheer!
31
TIT FOR TAT
When I was small
My Father began,
With the help of a ball,
To make me a man.
My Father began,
With the help of a ball,
To make me a man.
When I was tall
And broad I was glad,
With the help of a ball,
To keep him a lad.
And broad I was glad,
With the help of a ball,
To keep him a lad.
32
WHY?
Why think a drop or two of rain will hurt
Your cricket shirt?
Your cricket shirt?
Why haste so soon to scatter in affright
From dirty light?
From dirty light?
Why do to me what I should never do,
My lads, to you?
My lads, to you?
Why work so hard to make, by plod, plod, plod,
The Ringside nod?
The Ringside nod?
Why, being padded, scratch about like pens
Of languid hens?
Of languid hens?
Why bury, rather than restore to fame,
Britannia's Game?
Britannia's Game?
33
HEYDAY
I lift my cap to Veteran Time,
Who let me live throughout the years
When lordly batsmen cut and drove,
Surrounded by a ring of cheers!
My youth was mellowed in the sun
Of giants never equalled since,
As Clement Hill, the classic Gunn,
The Cambridge-Sussex-Indian Prince.
Who let me live throughout the years
When lordly batsmen cut and drove,
Surrounded by a ring of cheers!
My youth was mellowed in the sun
Of giants never equalled since,
As Clement Hill, the classic Gunn,
The Cambridge-Sussex-Indian Prince.
How often, when the last became
A ruthless tyrant, and controlled,
At heavy cost, whatever ball
The flabbergasted bowler bowled,
I felt my cricket-driven blood
Make legs and arms and shoulders tense,
Excited by the hammering thud
Of leather on the boundary fence!
A ruthless tyrant, and controlled,
At heavy cost, whatever ball
The flabbergasted bowler bowled,
I felt my cricket-driven blood
Make legs and arms and shoulders tense,
Excited by the hammering thud
Of leather on the boundary fence!
Imperial cricket lived with us
When Ranjitsinhji, swift and slim,
Defended England at the crease
And Victor Trumper countered him.
Their single hope, their single quest,
Was room in Cricket's Book of Gold,
And he that saw their brilliant best
Is finely paid for being old.
When Ranjitsinhji, swift and slim,
Defended England at the crease
And Victor Trumper countered him.
Their single hope, their single quest,
Was room in Cricket's Book of Gold,
And he that saw their brilliant best
Is finely paid for being old.
34
I touch my cap to Veteran Time,
Who gave me those electric years
When glittering demi-gods provoked
Volleys of superhuman cheers.
'Twas then I mellowed in the sun
Of batsmen never equalled since:
The Southland Pride, the Greatest Gunn,
The Cambridge-Sussex-Indian Prince!
Who gave me those electric years
When glittering demi-gods provoked
Volleys of superhuman cheers.
'Twas then I mellowed in the sun
Of batsmen never equalled since:
The Southland Pride, the Greatest Gunn,
The Cambridge-Sussex-Indian Prince!
35
AN OVER OF DAYS
Considered as the last six balls bowled to one of my friends by Captain Death.
Monday's shook him, but he blocked it.
Tuesday's reared. The Batsman cocked it
Safely past the Bowler's hand
Otherwise than thought had planned.
Tuesday's reared. The Batsman cocked it
Safely past the Bowler's hand
Otherwise than thought had planned.
Wednesday's was a Yorker, thrust
Outward in a drift of dust.
Outward in a drift of dust.
Thursday's nicked the off-side bail
In its narrow groove of metal,
While the Veteran—staggering, pale—
Watched it lift, fall back, and settle.
In its narrow groove of metal,
While the Veteran—staggering, pale—
Watched it lift, fall back, and settle.
Friday's, rushing like a boulder
Down a mountain, struck his bat
Fiercely on a pointed shoulder;
Sprang aloft to split his cheekbone
Like an eggshell; knocked him flat!
Beaten? Though divorced from mind,
Groped the twitching hands to find
What had fallen there. He touched it;
Laughed a conqueror's laugh; and clutched it.
Followed Saturday's astounding
Break-back—meteor-swift, confounding
Vision, pith, and nerve, and grounding
Two stumps out of three. No wonder
Death himself swayed panting under
Sudden gloom! A big-boned giant,
Long courageous, long defiant,
Sprawled (as loosely as the wicket)
Deaf to Umpire, dead to Cricket!
Down a mountain, struck his bat
Fiercely on a pointed shoulder;
Sprang aloft to split his cheekbone
Like an eggshell; knocked him flat!
Beaten? Though divorced from mind,
Groped the twitching hands to find
What had fallen there. He touched it;
Laughed a conqueror's laugh; and clutched it.
36
Break-back—meteor-swift, confounding
Vision, pith, and nerve, and grounding
Two stumps out of three. No wonder
Death himself swayed panting under
Sudden gloom! A big-boned giant,
Long courageous, long defiant,
Sprawled (as loosely as the wicket)
Deaf to Umpire, dead to Cricket!
37
THE FAVOURITE
Reward me well! I often brown
Your solemn face with oil in winter,
Preparing you to help our Town
Annex the Silver Cup. Don't splinter!
Have faith in me, as I in you,
And let us boldly front together
What pith and enterprise can do
Against us both with crimson leather.
Reward me well!
Your solemn face with oil in winter,
Preparing you to help our Town
Annex the Silver Cup. Don't splinter!
Have faith in me, as I in you,
And let us boldly front together
What pith and enterprise can do
Against us both with crimson leather.
Reward me well!
Weapon of worth! What times are these
When brain and wood, with splice and muscle,
Support the wholesome rivalries
Of Cricket's merry-mannered tussle!
Accept ere long your native shire's
Commending roar, and give my sinew
The loyal service it requires
From every ounce of merit in you,
Weapon of worth!
When brain and wood, with splice and muscle,
Support the wholesome rivalries
Of Cricket's merry-mannered tussle!
Accept ere long your native shire's
Commending roar, and give my sinew
The loyal service it requires
From every ounce of merit in you,
Weapon of worth!
Giver of joy! The year will come
When you—a treasure often carried
At evenfall triumphant home
From bowlers duly dared and parried—
Must fail the Ring. Yet you and I,
As snowbound fancy often chooses,
Upon our hearthrug will defy
The Leg-Break Merchant and his ruses,
Giver of joy!
When you—a treasure often carried
At evenfall triumphant home
From bowlers duly dared and parried—
38
As snowbound fancy often chooses,
Upon our hearthrug will defy
The Leg-Break Merchant and his ruses,
Giver of joy!
39
PAX BRITANNICA
“Round the world,” quoth Captain Cricket,
“Isn't very far to travel!
What are four-and-twenty thousand
Miles of water, rock, and gravel?
Having seen my art and patience
In respect of various Corkers,
Trust me, Lad, when Father Ocean
Slings me down his thundering Yorkers!
“Isn't very far to travel!
What are four-and-twenty thousand
Miles of water, rock, and gravel?
Having seen my art and patience
In respect of various Corkers,
Trust me, Lad, when Father Ocean
Slings me down his thundering Yorkers!
“Be there eight-and-forty thousand
Miles of furious foam for crossing,
Sinewy Bats and brainy Bowlers
Can't be countered by a tossing.
Just so long as foreign Peoples
Call for willow-wood and leather,
Englishmen shall laugh at Neptune
While he brews infernal weather.
Miles of furious foam for crossing,
Sinewy Bats and brainy Bowlers
Can't be countered by a tossing.
Just so long as foreign Peoples
Call for willow-wood and leather,
Englishmen shall laugh at Neptune
While he brews infernal weather.
“Would you have, in distant regions,
Furioso change to largo,
Add the implements of Cricket
Promptly to a steamer's cargo!
Let us ship evangelizing
Umpire, Bowler, Batsman, Scorer
Far from home, to prove the friendship
Active in the flying Fourer!
Furioso change to largo,
Add the implements of Cricket
Promptly to a steamer's cargo!
Let us ship evangelizing
Umpire, Bowler, Batsman, Scorer
Far from home, to prove the friendship
Active in the flying Fourer!
40
“This will be a perfect planet
Only when the Game shall enter
Every country, teaching millions
How to ask for Leg or Centre.
Closely heed a level-headed
Sportsman far too grave to banter:
When the cricket-bags are opened,
Doves of Peace fly forth instanter!”
Only when the Game shall enter
Every country, teaching millions
How to ask for Leg or Centre.
Closely heed a level-headed
Sportsman far too grave to banter:
When the cricket-bags are opened,
Doves of Peace fly forth instanter!”
41
NAN
No likenesses of poets stand
Among the knick-knacks in her room;
No hairy fiddler in a frame
Presents his late or early bloom.
Two Californian Stars of Film
Are featured on the mantelpiece,
Together with a statuette
From either Italy or Greece.
Among the knick-knacks in her room;
No hairy fiddler in a frame
Presents his late or early bloom.
Two Californian Stars of Film
Are featured on the mantelpiece,
Together with a statuette
From either Italy or Greece.
Upon a table, near a pot
Of aromatic somethingness,
A Wilfred, who is also Rhodes,
Is dapper in civilian dress;
And close beside a metal group
Of pigeons, geese, and various dogs
Her hero—Herbert Sutcliffe—smiles
His Century-smile in cricket togs.
Of aromatic somethingness,
A Wilfred, who is also Rhodes,
Is dapper in civilian dress;
And close beside a metal group
Of pigeons, geese, and various dogs
Her hero—Herbert Sutcliffe—smiles
His Century-smile in cricket togs.
She, Yorkshire born and Yorkshire bred,
Must feed on joy or suffer bane
When rival Roses take the field
In narky mood at Bramall Lane.
Her colour then is quick to tell
How many tints her flesh can wear,
And when a Six goes soaring by
She flushes to her throat and hair
Must feed on joy or suffer bane
When rival Roses take the field
In narky mood at Bramall Lane.
Her colour then is quick to tell
How many tints her flesh can wear,
And when a Six goes soaring by
She flushes to her throat and hair
42
If Herbert gives the brawny men
Of Lancashire but little rest,
This girl is happier than a thrush
With children underneath her breast;
But should the tragic oval squat
Behind his number on the Board
Her patriotic eyes confuse
The figures of the total scored.
Of Lancashire but little rest,
This girl is happier than a thrush
With children underneath her breast;
But should the tragic oval squat
Behind his number on the Board
Her patriotic eyes confuse
The figures of the total scored.
When Nan goes home at evenfall
And limply blunders to a seat,
Her mother and her sisters know
Their shire is threatened with defeat.
How should a dish of scrambled eggs
Relieve her gloom? Since hope has fled
Beyond a muffin's help, she takes
Her bruise and shattered pride to bed.
And limply blunders to a seat,
Her mother and her sisters know
Their shire is threatened with defeat.
How should a dish of scrambled eggs
Relieve her gloom? Since hope has fled
Beyond a muffin's help, she takes
Her bruise and shattered pride to bed.
43
A POINT OF VIEW
Prophets are thick in England now. They swear,
Some in delight, and some in scarlet passion,
That hunting of the fox must finish where
This sport has been so long a furious fashion.
Some in delight, and some in scarlet passion,
That hunting of the fox must finish where
This sport has been so long a furious fashion.
Conceivably. The wolf in time withdrew; the boar,
Bedecked in rosemary, escaped from dishes;
And if the bullied fox is run no more,
Good Luck will grant another of my wishes.
Bedecked in rosemary, escaped from dishes;
And if the bullied fox is run no more,
Good Luck will grant another of my wishes.
Prophets of genuine evil can be found
Whose prevalence of bile attacks the hoary
And signal services on many a ground
Of Cricket resonant in flannelled glory.
Whose prevalence of bile attacks the hoary
And signal services on many a ground
Of Cricket resonant in flannelled glory.
This is the hour of artificial hares
Bamboozling dogs; of cometary Scourges
Adroit at roaring round the Dirt Track flares
Amid a mob that bets and bawls and surges.
Bamboozling dogs; of cometary Scourges
Adroit at roaring round the Dirt Track flares
Amid a mob that bets and bawls and surges.
44
This is the age of cruisers in the sky,
Of speed gone mad, of funerals in a hurry.
See to it, then, that none of us shall die
Of tedium, Yorkshire, Lancashire, and Surrey!
Of speed gone mad, of funerals in a hurry.
See to it, then, that none of us shall die
Of tedium, Yorkshire, Lancashire, and Surrey!
Has County Cricket, as the prophets tell,
Only a decade left in which to dwindle
From vivid splendour such as used to swell
The veins and cause a multitude to kindle?
Only a decade left in which to dwindle
From vivid splendour such as used to swell
The veins and cause a multitude to kindle?
Forbid it, Heaven! Yet, in this age of speed,
A crucial slowness, not unlike Stonehenge's,
Is but a plan for tempting Time to breed
A brat or two by way of dark revenges.
A crucial slowness, not unlike Stonehenge's,
Is but a plan for tempting Time to breed
A brat or two by way of dark revenges.
45
LONG AGO
Many, many times I went
Along the leafy lanes of Kent,
Driving with a sunburnt set
Of clubmates in a wagonette.
Yellowhammers used to dip
Loopingly ahead and slip
Fast toward a cool recess
Of honeysuckle's loveliness,
Long, long ago.
Along the leafy lanes of Kent,
Driving with a sunburnt set
Of clubmates in a wagonette.
Yellowhammers used to dip
Loopingly ahead and slip
Fast toward a cool recess
Of honeysuckle's loveliness,
Long, long ago.
How it pleasured me to sit
And learn my England, bit by bit;
Trying not to nurse the thought
Of, later, getting out for nought!
Runs were riches then, and meant,
After broody discontent,
Hopes and promises of flame
To sparkle in the Foremost Game,
Long, long ago.
And learn my England, bit by bit;
Trying not to nurse the thought
Of, later, getting out for nought!
Runs were riches then, and meant,
After broody discontent,
Hopes and promises of flame
To sparkle in the Foremost Game,
Long, long ago.
Looking back, I note the green
Alive with those that long have been
Shadows of the village set
Of partners in a wagonette.
Memory, warming, now re-tells
Stolen runs. A million cells,
Murmuring cricket in my brain,
Agree to publish once again
Long, long ago.
Alive with those that long have been
Shadows of the village set
Of partners in a wagonette.
Memory, warming, now re-tells
Stolen runs. A million cells,
46
Agree to publish once again
Long, long ago.
Homeward many times I went—
A moody boy—by lanes in Kent,
Bidding Fancy flog the ball
That bowled me to the boundary wall.
Yet, when yellowhammers flung
Plumage to the air and swung,
Quick of passage, out of sight,
The sour turned sweet, the dark grew bright,
Long, long ago.
A moody boy—by lanes in Kent,
Bidding Fancy flog the ball
That bowled me to the boundary wall.
Yet, when yellowhammers flung
Plumage to the air and swung,
Quick of passage, out of sight,
The sour turned sweet, the dark grew bright,
Long, long ago.
47
TWO FOR GAME
A human eagle,
Feathered white,
Swoops past the palings on the right.
A bounce! A pounce!
His every ounce
Fiercely rapacious in our sight!
Feathered white,
Swoops past the palings on the right.
A bounce! A pounce!
His every ounce
Fiercely rapacious in our sight!
A crimson Fury
Near the stand
Batters in vain the dauntless hand.
A swerve! A curve!
His every nerve
Hustles the leather homeward. Grand!
Near the stand
Batters in vain the dauntless hand.
A swerve! A curve!
His every nerve
Hustles the leather homeward. Grand!
Again it rushes,
Swift and high,
Heedless of roar and groan and sigh.
A snatch! A catch!
A noble match
Loved and remembered till I die!
Swift and high,
Heedless of roar and groan and sigh.
A snatch! A catch!
A noble match
Loved and remembered till I die!
48
“PATSY”
Now that April's dead and gone,
May is here to spend her weeks
Warming grasses, fattening buds,
Spreading brown on pinky cheeks.
Since to lilac-time at Lord's
Flowery cricket has been added,
Middlesex again presents
(With customary compliments)
Hendren gloved and padded.
May is here to spend her weeks
Warming grasses, fattening buds,
Spreading brown on pinky cheeks.
Since to lilac-time at Lord's
Flowery cricket has been added,
Middlesex again presents
(With customary compliments)
Hendren gloved and padded.
Business-like and broad he comes
Down the famous steps, to bring
Volleys of regard and trust,
Many-throated from the Ring.
Schoolboys worship, maids admire,
Clicking cameras snap his bearing.
Thus his Londoners address
(With customary thoroughness)
Hendren dark and daring.
Down the famous steps, to bring
Volleys of regard and trust,
Many-throated from the Ring.
Schoolboys worship, maids admire,
Clicking cameras snap his bearing.
Thus his Londoners address
(With customary thoroughness)
Hendren dark and daring.
Merry round that spread of turf
Sit the ringside devotees,
Under heaven of Oxford blue,
Murmuring as ten million bees.
Since to lilac-time at Lord's
Comrade Cricket now is added,
Middlesex in joy presents
(With customary compliments)
Hendren gloved and padded.
Sit the ringside devotees,
Under heaven of Oxford blue,
Murmuring as ten million bees.
49
Comrade Cricket now is added,
Middlesex in joy presents
(With customary compliments)
Hendren gloved and padded.
50
THE PROTEST
Since even Virtue could at times
Depart from what alone was fitting,
And sneer at Cautionary Rhymes
In praise of hymnal and of knitting,
We scarcely wonder when we note
Disfigurements by age allotted
To that on which we mean to doat,
However badly blotted.
Depart from what alone was fitting,
And sneer at Cautionary Rhymes
In praise of hymnal and of knitting,
We scarcely wonder when we note
Disfigurements by age allotted
To that on which we mean to doat,
However badly blotted.
The sun himself, perhaps in sport,
Allows his planetary creatures
By smoky glass to view a wart
Or two upon his handsome features;
And Cricket, our athletic sun,
Is faulted by alarming patches
Of blisters due to what is done
To-day in County matches.
Allows his planetary creatures
By smoky glass to view a wart
Or two upon his handsome features;
And Cricket, our athletic sun,
Is faulted by alarming patches
Of blisters due to what is done
To-day in County matches.
Conspicuous in the list of fads,
Developed till they rank as vices,
Are legging balls with super-pads
And sitting doggedly on splices.
Such Bats as dim the Cricket Star
Supplied with flame by Thornton, Hayward,
And Victor Trumper, seem, and are,
Objectionally wayward.
Developed till they rank as vices,
Are legging balls with super-pads
And sitting doggedly on splices.
Such Bats as dim the Cricket Star
Supplied with flame by Thornton, Hayward,
And Victor Trumper, seem, and are,
Objectionally wayward.
51
Macartney of the Southland lives
To sparkle as the Drive's supporter.
With pen and spoken words he gives
The killers of the Game no quarter.
A pastime that was brought to birth
In England by heroic hitters,
And travelled sinewy round the earth,
Can spare deflecting Sitters.
To sparkle as the Drive's supporter.
With pen and spoken words he gives
The killers of the Game no quarter.
A pastime that was brought to birth
In England by heroic hitters,
And travelled sinewy round the earth,
Can spare deflecting Sitters.
52
TO A FAMOUS FIRM
Don't imagine I resent
Bitter lessons taught me,
Messrs Frost and Ice & Co.,
When you roughly fought me
Through the saplings, up the hill,
Over sodden heather,
Hour by hour with Kinderscout's
Double-fisted weather.
Bitter lessons taught me,
Messrs Frost and Ice & Co.,
When you roughly fought me
Through the saplings, up the hill,
Over sodden heather,
Hour by hour with Kinderscout's
Double-fisted weather.
Don't imagine I resent
Drifted fury seen on
Cutting Corner, where I met
Wind enough to lean on!
When the Christmas berries burn
Lamp-like on the hollies
Out I stagger, proud to front
Hail in slanting volleys!
Drifted fury seen on
Cutting Corner, where I met
Wind enough to lean on!
When the Christmas berries burn
Lamp-like on the hollies
Out I stagger, proud to front
Hail in slanting volleys!
Still, I savagely resent
Polar sleet in May-time
Just as much as farmers loathe
Deluges in hay-time.
When I hear romantic birds
Billing in a thicket
Then I hum the flats and sharps
Modulating Cricket.
Polar sleet in May-time
Just as much as farmers loathe
Deluges in hay-time.
When I hear romantic birds
Billing in a thicket
Then I hum the flats and sharps
Modulating Cricket.
53
Countless lads of Flanneldom,
Winter-weary, aching,
Hurry crease-ward, there to score
Totals worth the making.
Messrs Frost and Ice & Co.,
Think it shame to banish
Centuries from England! Budge!
Can't you hear me? Vanish!
Winter-weary, aching,
Hurry crease-ward, there to score
Totals worth the making.
Messrs Frost and Ice & Co.,
Think it shame to banish
Centuries from England! Budge!
Can't you hear me? Vanish!
54
SERVICE
All I can do now
Is to teach the Little Ones how
A cricketer stands,
The bat in his hands,
Fronting a short or tall
Man with a ball.
Is to teach the Little Ones how
A cricketer stands,
The bat in his hands,
Fronting a short or tall
Man with a ball.
A nephew is one;
And my neighbour's slip of a son
Is glad to be taught
To play as he ought,
Flogging his Ones and Twos,
Bearing his bruise.
And my neighbour's slip of a son
Is glad to be taught
To play as he ought,
Flogging his Ones and Twos,
Bearing his bruise.
With enough of time,
I can drill these lads for their prime.
Imagine a Studd—
A Jessop—in bud!
Ponder the infant blobs
Leading to Hobbs!
I can drill these lads for their prime.
Imagine a Studd—
A Jessop—in bud!
Ponder the infant blobs
Leading to Hobbs!
All I can do now
Is to teach the Little Ones how.
Because I am old,
And easily bowled,
Captains to-day decline
Help such as mine.
Is to teach the Little Ones how.
Because I am old,
And easily bowled,
Captains to-day decline
Help such as mine.
55
FAREWELL
Read in my book. If you think I am wrong
There to chastise any lapse from the splendid
Glow of the Game in my youth, I unfold
Proudly the Flag that my Father defended.
There to chastise any lapse from the splendid
Glow of the Game in my youth, I unfold
Proudly the Flag that my Father defended.
Read in my book. If unkindness were meant,
Now, on this ultimate page, I should falter.
Softness and slowness are evils. My verse
Carries no phrase that the Verseman will alter.
Now, on this ultimate page, I should falter.
Softness and slowness are evils. My verse
Carries no phrase that the Verseman will alter.
Read in my book. Try to learn how I love
Cricket, the masterful agent for fusing,
Year after year, all the citizen grades
England has used, and will use, and is using.
Cricket, the masterful agent for fusing,
Year after year, all the citizen grades
England has used, and will use, and is using.
| Messrs Bat and Ball | |