University of Virginia Library

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The Vindication of a Right Honourable Gentleman.

If for the deed we take the will,
More cause have we to bless him still;
Witness the famous Water Bill.
We all remember since each well
Had o'er it plac'd a centinel,
Who to the stoups, in double row,
Endeavour'd to make justice flow;

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'Tis true, not in a mighty stream,
But that was not the soldier's blame;
He gave it, as he got it, them.
But why was water then so scanty?
Why at this moment in such plenty?
His L---d---p wanted much to raise
A good round sum by means and ways;
And thought he'd do it safe and soon,
By playing on the pipes a tune
Of seven thousand pounds a year,
Which to be sure we well could bear,
And certainly had borne it, but
The town was in commotion put
By C---l---rs, B---n, and certain others
My Muse in kind oblivion smothers:
These gentlemen harrangu'd and wrote,
Examin'd books, accounts, what not;
In short, they kindled such a flame
As quite burnt up the Water Scheme.

Certes, I'm at no loss at all,
From's conduct to the Hospital,
Most irrefragably to prove
To the Good Town his wond'rous love;
No thinking person will refuse
There was much kindness in the Feus,
For five bolls bear, which all wise men do
Regard as next to no reddendo.
Some Parsons then complain'd upon
His L---d---p by Suspension;
But what they said was little heeded,
And all found orderly proceeded;

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3

I won't assign this reason for't,
He always has a friend at court;
But that it was thought just and right
T' extirpate Herriot's Children quite,
Finding this bold attempt to thrive well,
He trusted with its cash his rival:
A certain way, it must be own'd,
To turn it to a sinking fund;
If by that term you understand,
A fund on the declining hand.
To be inform'd you'll next expect
What of this conduct was th' effect:
Then guess how many children are
To be admitted for this year;
Or rather guessing let alone,
The fact is, not a single one;
And shifts are needful to maintain
The wretched handful that remain
On very humble fare.—Poor souls!
They mourn not at their stocking-holes,
Nor will they venture to refuse,
Tho' without soals, to wear their shoes.
And why should they grudge to be shabby,
Their Tr---r being in the Abby?

With such affection does he burn!
But mark the ill-deserv'd return:
'Twere small reward for all his pains
Both him and his to hang in chains;
T'entail a coat of velvet on
His family, from son to son;
And every day, if so he chuse,
To dine him well in Clearihue's;
And yet the mob, alas! alas!
Have try'd to put him off with grass,
Which would have render'd him still meaner
Than the unfortunate Conv---r.
—Shall we be so ungrateful?—No:
Come, let us send for Frank Lindo,
Or else the Knight of greater fame,
Who bears a Counsellor's high name;
And, than the life a little bigger,
Let him draw the great M'Gr---r;

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4

With cunning eye and air of State,
And seeming much to meditate
How to establish a poor's rate.
Next let the Painter duely range
Th' Infirmary and Royal 'Change,
That Herriot's work, these two between,
A noble ruin! may be seen:
Then let him represent Ar---le,
Receiving with a gracious smile
The C---cil prostrate on their knees,
(Such honours they can make with ease),
Intreating him, by way of Letter,
Than viva voce greatly better,
All differences to prevent,
To name a man to represent
The Good Town in the Parliament.