University of Virginia Library

EPIGRAMMATVM Centuria secunda.

EPIGRAM. 1. In lasciuos Poëtas.

Gather the refuse scraps of looser times:
Huddle them vp in your lasciuious rimes:
Let no lewd action scape, but if your wit
May frame eōceits thereon, then out with it.
Runne they that list with this the times abuse;
I scorne it I to prostitute my muse.

Epigram. 2. Ad Zoïlum.

I mought be better busied; I graunt so:
Could I be better idle? surely no.
Then hold your idle chat, for I professe,
These are the fruits but of my idlenesse.

Epigram. 3. Veritas in vino.

It is no truth, that truth's in wine: for why?
Drunkards, Ile stand too't, vse most for to lye.

Epigram. 4. In Chiromanticum quendam.

One by profession a Palmester,
That in his rare iudicials could not erre,
Would needsly cause me for to vnderstand,
My fortune by the looking in my hand.
Of which after he had a perfect view,
'Mongst many false, I scarce heard one thing true.
Then I, to quite me like a lusty lad,
Straight crau'd his hand to shew the skill I had.
And therein at the first sight did espie,
That he had beene arraign'd for fellonie.
Whereon I told him, if he did not mend,
Of his then shortly following crack-rope end.
Thy verdict, Reader: iudge indifferently,
Which had more skill, the Palmester, or I.

Epigram. 5. Vox Martyrum ad Tyrannos.

These liues you seeke, so brittle is our state,
N'ould we, we should at last resigne to fate.
What doe you then, by forcing vs to die,
But make a vertue of necessity.

Epigram. 6. Ad Illustriss. Walliæ Principem Henricum Fredericum.

Two Kings names giuen you so long agone
Shew'd you were borne to rule more Realmes then one.

Epigram. 7. Sunday.

Why doe we onely one day Sunday call,
Seing the Sunne distributes light to all?
Ist not because that then, in spight of spies,
That glorious Sunne of righteousnesse did rise?

Epigram. 8. Ad Nobilissimam Heroinam Dominam Hellenoram Marchionissam Northampton.

In Swethland borne, at length by Gods decree,
From thence to England-ward you crost the maine:
And so 'twixt both did share your dignity,
For what one land could so great worth containe?
They glory may with vs, and we with them,
By turnes to haue enioy'd so rare a Iemme.

Epigram. 9.

[Health is a iewell; true. VVhich when we buy]

Health is a iewell; true. VVhich when we buy,
Physitians value it accordingly.

Epigram. 10. In Beatricem præproperè defunctam.

In Beatrice did all perfections grow,
That shee could wish or nature could bestow.
VVhen death enamor'd with that excellence,
Straight grew in loue with her, and tooke her hence.

Epigram. 11. In quendam improbulom, qui semper contendebat, dari vacuum in cælo.

Thou beat'st on this, and still dost striue to proue,
That there is empty roome in heauen aboue.
God alone knowes whether't be so or no,
I list not argue it I, to or fro;
Yet thinke, except he send thee the more grace,
Thou'lt nere come there, to fill an empty place.

Epigram. 12. Ad Nobiliss. Doctissimumque Heroâ D. Henricum Howard Comitem Northampt. &c.

'Mongst schollers yours the first place is by due,
They should forget themselues, forgat they you.

Epigram. 13. Ad eundem.

Vnmatcht perhaps you haue so long stood forth
To finde a fit match answering to your worth.
If none but her that's worthy of your bed,
You n'ere will wed, you n'ere will any wed.

Epigram. 14. In Aluinum.

Some of Aluinus friends, met purposely
T'extoll his worth, did praise him for to bee
Well timber'd; and to giue him the more grace
One of them said he had a wainscot face.
Another, thinking sure to strike the stroke,
Reported, that he was all hart of Oke.
Commend they him this way the best they can,
Yet shall they make him but a woodden man.

Epigram. 15. In Martyrem & hæreticum eodem igne conflagrantes.

An Heretique, and Martyr doom'd to die,
Appointed were in the same fire to frie.
When loe, the flame, (which made all to admire)
Purg'd this, but th'other did infect the fire.

Epigram. 16. In Septimium.

The wisest sort in priuate, now and then,
Doe talke, and prate, and ieere like other men.
So they say Cato, turmoil'd all the day,
In state affaires, being Romes greatest stay
Yet at night time, after his bus'nesse done
Would vent his braines, and let his folly runne.
No sooner had Septimius heard of this,
(Scorning a wise mans property to misse)
But with his friends he, in a merry mood,
In his no small discretion thought it good,
To giue his folly raines, and to remit
Somewhat of that his ouer-plus of wit.
This he affected much with ill successe,
Then what he would be, being nothing lesse.
Not that he was wise, that will neuer be:
But farre lesse foolish, in his foolerie,
Then when he (silly foole) in his owne eyes
Did please himselfe, and seeme to be most wise.

Epigram. 17. Academia Oxoniensis ad D. Tho. Bodleium equitem.

My three crownes are your armes, which well I brooke,
And would, that with my crownes you gaue my booke.

Epigram. 18. In Chrysalum.

The miser Chrysalus will hardly spend
One crosse on his owne vse, much lesse will lend
Or giue ought to the poore of all his pelfe;
Blame him not, for he loues them as himselfe.

Epigram. 19. Ad D. Thomam Bilson Episc. Winton. filium libelli sui patronum.

Should I prescribe you rules (yet who am I
That should goe to prescribe rules vnto you?)
These they should be; t'adore the Deitie
And next to God, to giue the Prince his due.
VVill you haue yet a more compendious way?
Follow your fathers steps; you cannot stray.

Epigram. 20. In Quintum ad Academicos.

Vrge Quintus with a text of any waight,
This text answer's it selfe, he answer's straight.
If it doe so, t'is well; else all his wit
For ought I see, would hardly answere it.

Epigram. 21. In Montanum surdastrum.

Fat-gut Montanus that big-bellied Lout
Is nought else but a tympanie throughout
Why meruaile yee then that he nothing heares,
Who euer saw a belly that had eares?

Epigram. 22. In Iusti Lipsij virginem Hallensem.

For very shame I would not haue beene said
In mine olde age to dote so on a maid.

Epigram. 23. Ad D.Io. Harmar S. Theol. Doct. Collegij Winton. Custodem.

My pens slit tongue, but lately learn'd to creake,
Knowes not how of your many tongues to speake.

Epigram. 24. Ad M. Nicolaum Loue Scholæ Winton, informatorem, suum quondam præceptorem.

Riuers spring from the Sea, and runne againe
With stint-lesse source at length into the maine
I am a Riuer, you the Ocean are,
From whence with many more I tooke my share.
Giue this small riu'let then your leaue to runne
Into the Ocean whence it first begunne.

Epigram. 25. Heauen on earth.

Who make this earth their heauen whereon they dwell
Their heauen once past, must looke to finde an Hell.

Epigram. 26. In Rob. Parsons Iesuitam. Rob-ertus.

Epigram. 27. Ad D.Iacobum Cooke LL.Doctorem & Theologum.

Law and Diuinity met in your head,
As in Rebeccaes wombe the twins did lie,
Of Esau she was first deliuered,
And you of Law, before Diuinity:
Then Isaac-like, from whom you may not swerue,
Make Iacob rule the rost, and Esau serue.

Epigram. 28. Ad M.Robertum Pinck Nou. Coll.socium: Acad. Oxon.Procuratorem de Paracelso.

They say that Paracelsus by his skill
Could make one more immortal then the moone:
If it were so (as credite it who will)
Thinke you he would haue died himselfe so soone?

Epigram. 29. In Friscum.

Friscus feeling his purse-strings in good plight,
Would needs in all post hast be made a Knight.
And told his wife she should be Ladyfied,
To whom halfe moou'd, she snappishly replied,
I Madam? meaner titles will fit me,
Your Mistresse I, I'le not your Lady bee.
Next, will you buy your Knight-hood like a mome,
When you may gratis here be dub'd at home?

Epigram. 30. De ambitione ad Aulicos.

This is ambitions course first to get place
Next vnto those, which are then most in grace.
Then, for to labour still, and neuer rest,
Till it be parallell vnto the best.
This got, yet on she will, and take a fall,
But she will get to ouertop them all.
Which once atchieu'd, with good successe to friend,
Then grieues she, that she has atttain'd her end.

Epigram. 31. In pragmaticum quendam.

No matter can there be of ieopardy,
But you will vndertake it presently.
Beware of vndertaking things so fast,
Least you be ouertaken at the last.

Epigram. 32. Ad M.Iohannem Hoskins I.C.

The yonkers which of late did trot and praunce,
Frisking it nimbly in the morrice daunce.
Vpon a new aduenture now are bound,
The like not to be seene aboue the ground:
To warres forsooth: and whether mought it be?
To the low Countries, where they all agree,
Vnder the Graue, when time serues to stand too't,
And thence till doomes day not to moue a foot.

Epigram. 33. In Pythagoram.

When that same Samian went about to show
How mens soules stil frō men to beasts did passe
It's credible of all the beasts I know,
That's owne soule at that time liu'd in an Asse.

Epigram. 34. In obitum sanctissimi viri D. Iohannis Reynoldi S. Theol Doct. Oxoniensis.

Thy death it was hard for to be discried,
Liuing thou wert so dead, so mortified.

Epigram. 35. Ad auarum quendam.

The barrels into which the Belides
Did poure in water still with stint-lesse paine
Tooke all they brought, and to their little ease,
Held it not long, but let it out againe.
Thy gripple fist, not altogether so,
Takes all, but taking all, lets nothing goe.

Epigram. 36. In quendam omniscium.

All things you know: what all? if it be so
Then you know this too, that you nothing know.

Epigram. 37. Ad M. Guidonem Dobbins Coll. Winton. Socium, patris sui quondam familiarem.

Gvido, the patterne of vnfained zeale,
Vithin whose breast, as in his proper place
True loue takes vp his stand; whose very weale,
Is his friend's good; whose death his friend's disgrace,
It ioy's me for to thinke my Father was,
Yet grieues me more to thinke he is not now,
Ioyn'd to you with that chaine as strong as brasse,
Of friendships doubly intermutuall vow.
Long since his body bad his soule adieu,
And yet me thinkes I see him liue in you.

EPIGRAM. 38. Ad M. Brewer medicum Bathon.

This phrase, to drinke a health, is onely trew,
Of drinke which men of your profession brew.

Epigram. 39. In Momum.

Momus would act the fooles part in a play,
And 'cause he would be exquisite that way,
Hies me to London, where no day can passe,
But that some play-house still his presence has.
Now at the Globe with a iudicious eye,
Into the Vice's action doth he prie.
Next to the Fortune, where it is a chaunce,
But he mark's something worth his cognisance.
Then to the Curtaine, where, as at the rest,
He notes that action downe that likes him best.
Being full fraught, at length he gets him home,
And Momus now, know's how to play the Mome.
There want's nought but a fooles cap on his head,
As for the action tut, hee'le strike it dead.
When the time came, he comes me on the stage,
Rap't as it were with an vnwieldy rage,
Of a fantastique braine, and gables out
Some senselesse wordes, well fitting such a lout:
Then his vnsauory speech he enterlaces,
With wreathed mouths, and filthy antike faces.
Fie on this Mimick skill, it marres his part:
Nature would doe farre better without art.

Epigram. 40.

[Ovr common parents straight vpon their fall]

Ovr common parents straight vpon their fall
Made breeches for to hide their shame with all
And as we read, both alike wore them then
Now females weare the breeches more then men.

Epigram. 41. Ad Capitaneum Winter. iuxtà Capitaneum Wood Bathoniæ degentem.

I cannot but commend your choice for good,
In that you Winter it so neare to Wood.

Epigram. 42. In Cornutum.

Cornutus hearing some prankes of his wife
(How true God knowes) thence with a watchfull eye
Obseru'd her still; nor could shee for her life,
Steppe out, but he would track her presently,
Why what an Asse was this to labour so,
To know that which he would be loath to know.

Epigram. 43. Ad T. S. hospitem suum de hospitio.

Lodging some which in shew like men appeare,
You take in many an Angell in a yeare.

Epigram. 44. In Lalum.

Marke Lalus when he doth a tale begin,
And say whether, d'ye see, doe not come in:
See, or not see, all's one, what neede he feare?
'Twere better for him, if we did not heare.

EPIGRAM. 45. Ad cognatos suos, Henricum, Robertum, & Gulielimum, Stephanos.

Cozens, your name seemes to import a crowne,
And crowns your chests can witnes you haue store
If you respect your glory or renowne,
There is one crowne yet to be sought for more.
A crowne, not such a one as Kings doe weare
For that, you know is subiect to the rust:
A crowne it is which endlesse date shall beare
Reseru'd in heauen for none but the iust.
Let others then goe scrape for muckie gaine,
And, caitiues as they are, be Mammons slaues;
This greedy gulfe it will procure their paine,
VVhen they shall beare not one crosse to their graues.
But you as Pilgrims going a long way,
Carry nought but your needments at your backe;
As much as may your charges well defray;
Shunne superfluity, and rather lacke.
For he that is for such a iourney dight,
In my conceit, he cannot goe too light.

Epigram. 46. In itinerantium fabulas.

Among strange tales which trauellers doe tell,
They talke of Pigmey-brats, & where they dwell
The place which for their Countrey they assigne,
Is out beyond the Mauritanian mine.
VVhy say they not, that they are here hard by?
So mought men take them tripping in a lye.

Epigram. 47. Ad M. Rob. Chambers, de Creatione, & fine sæculi.

God he made all of nought before the fall,
Yet will not in the end make nought of all.

EPIGRAM. 48.

[Philip, and Franck, and such like names there bee]

Philip, and Franck, and such like names there bee
That alike to both sexes doe agree:
Will is a name to men alonely due,
VVomen so call'd as yet I neuer knew.
Yet mought they well, being for the most part still,
So aukward, and so giuen to their will.
Or else, that the confusion may be lesse,
Will, be a mans name: womans, wilfulnesse.

Epigram. 49. In fratrem suum nuper defunctum.

One brother had I whilst thou wer't aliue:
But one it is no number, as some say:
None had I then whil'st thou didst yet suruiue
What haue I now since thou art t'ane away?
If none before, then sure, since thou art gone,
It followes that I must haue lesse then none.

Epigram. 50. Ad M. Tho. Iamesium de libello suo cuititulus, Catalogus librorum Biblioth. publ. &c.

What so is in a thing that is contain'd,
Must needes be in that which containes that thing.
This axionte to be but forg'd and fain'd,
An instance shall euince, which now I bring.
Your booke my studies roome can well enfold:
But the bookes in your booke it cannot hold.

Epigram. 51. In Anginam.

The squinancy, a most tormenting paine,
Heates a mans iawes, and so enflames his braine,
Then with excessiue paine our sleepe doth breake:
And which is worst it will not let one speake.
If any Lawyer sicke of this doe lye,
Send him to me, I know a remedy.

Epigram. 52. In Parcum.

Parcus inuited me with many more
To take a supper with him such a day:
Welcome's your cheere, said he, looke for no store:
A short come off, but a bit and away.
I thought a while these wordes were complement,
Yet found at last he spoke but what he meant.
When we had emptied all his dishes cleane,
About which businesse long we did not dwell,
Parcus at last, as was his wonted meane,
At parting kindly bad vs all fare-well.
At home we did, and so by chaunce we sped,
Else mought we haue gone supperlesse to bed.

Epigram. 53. De seruo eligendo.

If e're I haue, I will haue, if I can,
A lustie, and a trustie seruing-man.

Epigram. 54. Ad D. Thomam Ryues, LL. Doct. nou. coll. socium.

The Law, they say giues eu'ry man his due;
VVere I a Lawyer, so would I giue you:
Since I professe me to be no such man,
Looke not for what I would, but what I can.

Epigram. 55. In proditores puluerarios.

If that most horrid, execrable deed
VVherein so many were design'd to bleed,
Had sped, then Puritans had forth-with bin,
Blazed for th' actors of that damned sinne.
And Puritans they were, I graunt it free:
But Papist-Puritans, as Iesuites bee.
Or otherwise thus: they were Puritans:
From the Greeke πυρ, to wit, Ignatians.
Iesuitæ, sic dicti ab Ignatio Loiolâ.

Epigram. 56. In Athum.

Athus his liuing Couze could ne're abide,
So like a naile he stucke in's vlcerous side.
When he was dead, and had left him behind,
Neuer man to a kinsman was more kind.
T'is strange to thinke how highly he him prais'd.
What lamentations and what moanes he rais'd.
VVhy, yet I see all kindnesse was not fled,
T'is loue, to loue one though for being dead.

Epigram. 57. Solæcismus Grammaticalis ad M. Antonium Geffreys.

How e're Grammarians do their speeches frame,
And to be lou'd, do a verbe Passiue name;
Try who so list, and he at length shall proue,
That they are most in passion, which do loue.

EPIGRAM. 58. Ad Crassum, de formâ corporeitatis.

If that it be at all, then certainly
Thou hast that forme of corporeitie.

EPIGRAM. 59. The vanitie of the eye. Ad M. Geo. Hakewill.

So rightly set you downe the vanities
Of those bewitching lights, I meane our eyes,
That I doe here confesse you make me doubt,
VVhether 'twere best or no to doe them out.
For as we see a seel'd Doue mounts vpright,
So would our thoughts free'd from the let of sight.

Epigram. 60. Aenigma; ad Lectorem.

What creature mought that be as you suppose,
That beares his eyes, no eyes, on's nose, no nose.

EPIGRAM. 61. De Peccato. Ad M. Guliel. Twisse Theolog.

By sinne from blisse our common parents fell,
And we with them incurr'd the paines of hell.
Yet this, which all mankind did so enthrall,
Some a priuation, and a nothing call.
VVith iustice selfe how could it then agree,
For nothing so to plague mortalitie?

Epigram. 62.

[Knowledge it puffeth vp: and yet I see]

Knowledge it puffeth vp: and yet I see,
No reason why our knowledge should do so:
Hauing it in so slender a degree,
As none need feare least it should ouer-flow.
All the perfection vnto which we come,
Is but to be lesse ignorant then some.

EPIGRAM. 63. Stoica, & Christiana resolutio: ad M. Ioan. Hoskins LL. Baccal. noui coll. Socium.

Tyrannvs. Stoicvs.
Ty.
Thy goods they shall be confiscate to me,

St.
I care not much for that; suppose they be.

Ty.
In dungeon darke thou shalt be vnder keepe.

St.
Is't darke? the better shall I see to sleepe.

Ty.
If all this will not serue, then looke to die:

St.
As though I thought to liue immortally.

Tyrannvs, Christianvs.
Ty.
I'le take from thee the goods thou had'st before:

Ch.
The God which gaue me those, can giue me more.

Ty.
Close pen't in prison shalt thou rottting lie.

Ch.
Thraldome for his sake is true libertie.

Ty.
Then last, I will thee vtterly destroy.

Ch.
VVelcome my death, an entrance into ioy.

EPIGRAM. 64. In Amorphum.

Amorphus steps not out of dores a nights,
For feare of meeting some mishapen sprights.
Whereas saw they his face so grisly grim,
The sprights they would be more afraid of him.

EPIGRAM. 65. In Fortunatum.

Don Fortunatus trauailing by night,
Mass'd of his way ith darke, as well he might
At length roaming a long time vp and downe,
He tooke a path, that led him to a Towne.
And there, as God would, lighted on his friend
Bed-rid, and as then drawing neere his end.
Who, of his presence being wondrous glad,
Possess'd him by his will of all he had.
And so, though Fortunatus went astray
He found, that it was nothing out of sway.

Epigram. 66. In Medonem.

Stand forth, and proue who dares, if so he can,
That Captaine Medon is no Gentleman.
Who when men fists about his eares did flie
Most gently put vp all without replie.

Epigram. 67. Ad amantissimos fratres Robertum & Richardum Adamos noui Collegij Socios.

Adam's first children, in the worlds first state,
Were iangling still, and still were at debate.
Till by that enuious, and bloud-thirstie Cain,
Abel, not able to resist, was slaine,
You Adams children, his first children bee,
Yet brother-like, nay friend-like both agree.

Epigram. 68. In Nasonem.

Naso had no tricke left to scape his foes
But to take couert vnder his huge nose.

EPIGRAM. 69.

[A Woman ouer-cloyd with great distresse]

A Woman ouer-cloyd with great distresse,
Came to me and bewail'd her wretchednesse.
Yet if I may coniecture by my sight,
Surely she was not such a wretched wight.
Full fac't, plum cheekt, her sides three inches thicke:
So clog'd with fat, that a snaile mou'd more quicke.
If likely then said I, that you should be
Subiect to such a deale of miserie,
And keepe your flesh so well; then straight she cries:
And after teares gaue leaue, thus she replies:
Grosse am I growne for want of due reliefe;
And, out alas, I am puft vp with griefe,

Epigram. 70. Ad medicos, de nouo genere medendi.

Christ heales our wounds, not as Physitians doe,
For he prescribes and takes the potion too.

Epigram. 71. In memoriam Charoli Hoskins nov. Coll. quondam Socij, & sui familiaris defuncti.

That thou wer't witty, if I tell thy name,
I know there's none will contradict the same.
Oh had thy body answer'd to thy minde.
Thou would'st (or els affection makes me blinde)
Haue beene one of the mirrours of our dayes,
Borne both thine owne, and countreyes name to raise.
Pitty it was (but that it was Gods will)
That so diuine a wit did dwell so ill.

Epigram. 72. In Pharaonem.

Pharaoh, for all his plagues yet still tooke hart,
Nor would he let Gods people to depart.
It had beene better for him and his race,
Had he t'ane lesse hart, and more hart of grace.

Epigram. 73. In Gallam.

Galla's as foule a wench, the truth to say,
As one shall light on in a summers day:
Yet Scylla faine would match her with his heyre
Shee's rich, and sickly, though she be not faire.

Epigram. 74. In Misum.

Misus hath great possessions in his hand,
Millions of money too, at his commaund.
His grounds they spread so, that a strong-wing'd Kite,
Can hardly flie about them at one flight.
And yet this Cribfist, this penurious chuffe
Still scrapes as though he nere should haue enough.
Seekes he but that which is sufficient?
Then halfe his goods would haue wrought his content.
Seekes he to glut his greedy gormandize?
Not twice ten thousand worlds will it suffice.

Epigram. 75. In Porcum.

Porcus that foule vnsociable hogge,
Grunts me out this still: Loue me, loue my dog.
And reason is there why we should so doe,
Since that his dog's the louelier of the two.

Epigram. 76. In Ariostum Orlandi furiosi autorem.

He that could so well expresse those frantike fits,
Shewes that himselfe was passing well in's wits.

Epigram. 77. In Hesperidum.

Riches crept on Hesperidus by stealth,
Yet can he not get manners to his wealth:
His holy-dayes face is to loure and pout,
His salutation not to bend, but lout.
His best of gestures is but like a clownes,
His laughter grinning, and his smiles are frownes.

Epigram. 78. In transubstantiatores.

The Cannibal's eate men with greedinesse:
And Transubstantiators doe no lesse:
No lesse? nay more; and that farre more by ods;
Those eate mans flesh, these rauine vpon Gods.

Epigram. 79. In Cinnam.

When Cinna saw, how that his spouse misse-led
Had not beene true vnto his nuptiall bed.
It irk't him, and his griefe did so abound,
That at the length he fell into a swound.
His neighbours sent-for came vnto his aide;
At length recouer'd, like one halfe dismaide,
He lifts me vp his dreary drouping eyes,
And then bespoke his friendes there in this wise.
Not being Cuckold makes me in this traunce,
Neighbours, alas, you know, a common chaunce!
Had any other woman seru'd me so,
It had not mou'd me halfe so much; but ô
This, this it is, that grieues me to the life,
That I should be made Cuckold by my wife.

Epigram. 80. Ad Rhemistas de translatione noui Testamenti ab illis editâ.

Depositum, supersubstantiall bread,
The transmigration, deflorished,
Impudicities, supererogate,
Exinanited, repropitiate,
The day Dominicall, ebrietie,
With commessations, superedifie,
And such like monstrous tearmes, that I may leaue,
To reckon vp the Pasch, and Parasceue:
Are these fit wordes for a translation
Pray in the language of what nation?

Epigram. 81. In Rufum.

Rvfus got's nose so full of fiery wheales,
By studying presently vpon his meales.
Credit you not this tale? I pray Sir, why?
It sounds not to my hearing like a lye.
For straight on meales still may you see the man
In a browne study at an Ale-house Can.

Epigram. 82.

[Those men whose minds on earthly things are pight]

Those men whose minds on earthly things are pight
Must needs worke works of darknes & the night.
For night it selfe, should we search out her birth,
VVhat is it but the shadow of the earth?

Epigram. 83. In vecordem quendam de patris virtute iactabundum.

Brag of thy Fathers valour as well knowne,
For sure I am thou canst not of thine owne.

Epigram. 84.

[Some men I graunt from wedlock may be free]

Some men I graunt from wedlock may be free,
But those men which are husbands, cannot bee.
Yet knew I one was both, which had no wife,
For he was neuer married in his life.

Epigram. 85.

[What man is there a tenaunt but at will]

What man is there a tenaunt but at will,
Knowing he may, as now, be turned out:
VVill, on no further hopes, be building still?
And decke his house, and garnish it about?
Yet we decke vp our corps, and make them gay,
Likely for ought we know, to die to day.

Epigram. 86. Ad cognatum quendam sui nominis.

Brotherhood lies low buried vnder ground,
And nought but couznage now is to be found.

Epigram. 87. In Christophorum fœneratorem.

You beare Christ (for your name was giuen thence)
VVhere trow? sure not within your conscience.
For he that inly bore Christ so, that man,
Would haue borne one day with a Christian.

Epigram. 88.

[The strowting Peacocke, hauing once descride]

The strowting Peacocke, hauing once descride
His ougly feete, then forthwith vailes his pride.
Should we looke on our feete as he, I feare
T'would rather make vs prowder then we were.

Epigram. 89. De Dijs gentium, ad Christianos.

What debosht creatures, worse then bad by ods,
Did not the Heathen vse t'enroll for Gods?
Ioue ouer all must haue the highest throne,
Although his wife, and Sister be all one.
Venus that tyr'd, and common hackney minion,
A Goddesse is at least in their opinion.
The swill-bowle Bacchus with his dropsie face,
In heauen, as his by due, may claime a place.
But these conceipts long since are banished,
And with their first inuentors now are dead.
Those vices, which we cannot well defie,
Yet at the least, let not vs deifie.

Epigram. 90. Iustitia vniuersalis.

An vniuersall, as such, in no case,
Is to be tied to tearmes of time or place.
Iustice is vniuersall, wherefore then,
Seeke we now for to finde it amongst men?

Epigram. 91. In Linum.

Linus, what e're it is disturb's his pate,
Is as they say growne out of's wits alate.
How can it be that he should now begin,
For to be out of that he ne're was in?

Epigram. 92. Tobacco.

We buy the driest wood that we can finde,
And willingly would leaue the smoke behinde.
But in Tobacco a thwart course we take,
Buying the hearb onely for the smokes sake.

Epigram. 93. Amor cæcus.

Loue through our eyes doth first an entrance finde,
How is it then they say that loue is blinde?
Know ye not how both these may well agree?
Though he be blinde, yet can his mother see.

Epigram. 94. In Atheum & Zatheum.

When Atheus swore, I wish'd him to forbeare:
This was the mēds: he swears he did not sweare
When Zatheus swore, I wish'd him to forbeare.
This was the mends; he sayes he will not sweare.
Which will you credit, take your choice of both,
This later's promise, or that Hell-hounds oath.

Epigram. 95. In quendam ægrè ferentem bestiarum nomina nobis accommodari.

Blame not those which beasts names to mē do giue,
Since men more like to beasts, then men, do liue.

Epigram. 96.

[Whilst it is yet new dayes, we frolick free]

Whilst it is yet new dayes, we frolick free,
Letting the raines to sinne at libertie.
Thus doe we liue to day, to morrow die.
And then say, where is all our iollitie?

Epigram. 97. In fœminas vultus suos pingentes.

Blush ye not, that you may looke graciously,
With ointments so your blushlesse cheeks to die?
That which is so bedaub'd, so plaistred o're,
Shal it be call'd a face, or else a sore?

Epigram. 98. In Porum.

Porus the onely slouen of our dayes,
Is (for I dare auouch it to his praise)
No punie scholler, wonderfully read,
As any of his time that beares a head.
Yet of all the Authors common here with vs,
It seemes he ne're heard of Go-clenius.

Epigram. 99. Ad Pontum, de Fusco.

Fvscus, you say has hit vpon of late
A comely proper woman for his mate.
Comely I graunt: but proper? ho there why?
Dare you assure him that? so doe not I.

EPIGRAM. 100. Ad Momum.

Let any riper iudgement reprehend
What he list in these lines, as slightly pend.
His iust doome, though condemn'd, I must aby,
And put it vp, although vnwillingly.
As for you Momus, if you carpe Sir, looke
To heare more from me in another booke.