University of Virginia Library

MUSINGS.

This is my birth-day! Twenty-five years old!
Methinks I stand midway between two deaths—
The one, which was before my birth—the other,
That which ere long will wrap me in its shades.
And standing thus, how many thoughts spring forth—
(Even as stars, watching the eclipsed moon,
Swarm out in heaven)—into the dark abyss
Which time has made my heart. It is not long
That I have walked the pathways of the world;
And yet the shadowy phantoms of dead hopes,
Withered affections and unnurtured love,
Throng round my path and in the memory—
(Even as glooms that throng around the stars,)
Making life dark, a lightless wilderness.
[OMITTED]
Alas for my unsandalled feet! They bleed,
Pierced by the thorns which strew the paths of life.
I rushed into my youth with burning hopes,
High aspirations after starry Fame.
The hopes which were the planets that did light
My life, are gone—for Time has hidden them
With the pale shadow of his stern eclipse.
And I have wandered many a day and long
Amid the world—and tried its friendship well;
And I have struggled with cold poverty,
And persecution, obloquy, and wrong,
Until my heart grew bitter. I have made
The desert, and the mountain snow, my bed—
Spoken strange tongues, and congregated with
The tameless savage of the wilderness,
Until I felt as tameless as himself.
The morning of my life has passed away,
And clouds and dimness rest upon its shapes
Of pain or pleasure. I am well content.
The golden stars that smile above my head—
The planet-peopled heaven—and the sea
Glorious in terror or in beauty—all
Of brilliant and magnificent on earth,
Have yet a charm for me—and more than all,
My quiet home;—and she who makes that home
A living paradise, will cheer me on—
And I will live, and sing my humble strain,
Although the cold world close its careless ears
Unto the quiet music of my song.