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THE LAWYER'S VALENTINE.

I'm notified, fair neighbor mine,
By one of our profession,
That this—the Term of Valentine—
Is Cupid's Special Session.
Permit me, therefore, to report
Myself, on this occasion,
Quite ready to proceed to Court,
And File my Declaration.
I've an Attachment for you, too;
A legal and a strong one;
Oh, yield unto the Process, do;
Nor let it be a long one!
No scowling bailiff lurks behind;
He 'd be a precious noddy,
Who, failing to Arrest the mind,
Should go and Take the Body!
For though a form like yours might throw
A sculptor in distraction;
I could n't serve a Capias,—no,
I 'd scorn so base an action!
Oh, do not tell me of your youth,
And turn away demurely;
For though you 're very young, in truth,
You 're not an Infant surely!
The Case is everything to me;
My heart is love's own tissue;
Don't plead a Dilatory Plea;
Let 's have the General Issue!
Or, since you've really no Defense,
Why not, this present Session,
Omitting all absurd pretense,
Give judgment by Confession?
So shall you be my lawful wife;
And I—your faithful lover—
Be Tenant of your heart for Life,
With no Remainder over!
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