 | Clever stories of many nations |  |
53
THE TARTAR WHO CAUGHT A TARTAR.
A HUNGARIAN LEGEND.
I.
There's trouble in Hungary, now, alas!There's trouble on every hand;
For that terrible man,
The Tartar Khan,
Is ravaging over the land!
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II.
He is riding forth with his ugly men,To rob and ravish and slay:
For deeds like those,
You may well suppose,
Are quite in the Tartar-way.
III.
And now he comes, that terrible chief,To a mansion grand and old:
And he peers about
Within and without,
And what do his eyes behold?
IV.
A thousand cattle in fold and field,And sheep all over the plain,
And noble steeds,
Or rarest breeds,
And beautiful crops of grain.
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V.
But finer still is the hoarded wealthThat his ravished eyes behold,
In silver plate
Of wondrous weight,
And jewels of pearl and gold!
VI.
A nobleman owns this fine estate:And when the robber he sees,
'Tis not very queer
He quakes with fear,
And trembles a bit in the knees!
VII.
He quakes in fear of his precious life,And scarce suppressing a groan,
“Good Tartar,” says he,
“Whatever you see
Be pleased to reckon your own!”
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VIII.
The Khan looked round in a leisurely wayAs one who is puzzled to choose;
When, cocking his ear,
He chanced to hear
The creak of feminine shoes!
IX.
The Tartar smiled a villanous smile,When, like a lily in bloom,
A lady fair
With golden hair
Came gliding into the room!
X.
The robber stared with amorous eyes;Was ever so winning a face?
And long he gazed
As one amazed
To see such beauty and grace!
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XI.
A moment more, and the lawless manHad seized his struggling prey,
Without remorse,
And—taking horse—
He bore the lady away!
XII.
“Now Heaven be praised!” the nobleman cried,“For many a mercy to me!
I bow me still
Unto His will.
God pity the Tartar!” said he.
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HO-HO OF THE GOLDEN BELT.
ONE OF THE “NINE STORIES OF CHINA.”
A beautiful maiden was little Min-Ne,
Eldest daughter of wise Wang-Ke;
Her skin had the color of saffron tea,
And her nose was flat as flat could be;
And never were seen such beautiful eyes,
Two almond-kernels in shape and size,
Eldest daughter of wise Wang-Ke;
Her skin had the color of saffron tea,
And her nose was flat as flat could be;
And never were seen such beautiful eyes,
Two almond-kernels in shape and size,
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Set in a couple of slanting gashes,
And not in the least disfigured by lashes;
And then such feet!
You'd scarcely meet
In the longest walk through the grandest street
(And you might go seeking
From Nanking to Peeking)
A pair so remarkably small and neat
And not in the least disfigured by lashes;
And then such feet!
You'd scarcely meet
In the longest walk through the grandest street
(And you might go seeking
From Nanking to Peeking)
A pair so remarkably small and neat
Two little stumps,
Mere pedal lumps,
That toddle along with the funniest thumps,
In China, you know, are reckoned trumps.
It seems a trifle, to make such a boast of it;
But how they will dress it,
And bandage and press it,
By making the least, to make the most of it!
Mere pedal lumps,
That toddle along with the funniest thumps,
In China, you know, are reckoned trumps.
It seems a trifle, to make such a boast of it;
But how they will dress it,
And bandage and press it,
By making the least, to make the most of it!
As you may suppose,
She had plenty of beaux
Bowing around her beautiful toes,
Praising her feet, and eyes, and nose
In rapturous verse and elegant prose!
She had plenty of beaux
Bowing around her beautiful toes,
Praising her feet, and eyes, and nose
In rapturous verse and elegant prose!
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She had lots of lovers, old and young;
There was lofty Long, and babbling Lung,
Opulent Tin, and eloquent Tung,
Musical Sing, and, the rest among,
Great Hang-Yu and Yu-be-Hung.
There was lofty Long, and babbling Lung,
Opulent Tin, and eloquent Tung,
Musical Sing, and, the rest among,
Great Hang-Yu and Yu-be-Hung.
But though they smiled and smirked and bowed,
None could please her of all the crowd;
Lung and Tung she thought too loud;
Opulent Tin was much too proud;
Lofty Long was quite too tall;
Musical Sing sung very small;
And, most remarkable freak of all,
Of great Hang-Yu the lady made game,
And Yu-be-Hung she mocked the same,
By echoing back his ugly name!
None could please her of all the crowd;
Lung and Tung she thought too loud;
Opulent Tin was much too proud;
Lofty Long was quite too tall;
Musical Sing sung very small;
And, most remarkable freak of all,
Of great Hang-Yu the lady made game,
And Yu-be-Hung she mocked the same,
By echoing back his ugly name!
But the hardest heart is doomed to melt;
Love is a passion that will be felt;
And just when scandal was making free
To hint “what a pretty old maid she'd be,”—
Little Min-Ne,
Who but she?
Love is a passion that will be felt;
And just when scandal was making free
To hint “what a pretty old maid she'd be,”—
Little Min-Ne,
Who but she?
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Married Ho—Ho of the Golden Belt!
A man, I must own, of bad reputation,
And low in purse, though high in station,—
A sort of Imperial poor—relation,
Who ranked as the Emperor's second cousin
Multiplied by a hundred dozen;
And, to mark the love the Emperor felt,
Had a pension clear
Of three pounds a year,
And the honor of wearing a Golden Belt!
A man, I must own, of bad reputation,
And low in purse, though high in station,—
A sort of Imperial poor—relation,
Who ranked as the Emperor's second cousin
Multiplied by a hundred dozen;
And, to mark the love the Emperor felt,
Had a pension clear
Of three pounds a year,
And the honor of wearing a Golden Belt!
And gallant Ho-Ho
Could really show
A handsome face, as faces go
In this Flowery Land, where, you must know,
The finest flowers of beauty grow.
He'd the very widest kind of jaws,
And his nails were like an eagle's claws,
And—though it may seem a wondrous tail—
(Truth is mighty and will prevail!)
He'd a queue as long as the deepest cause
Under the Emperor's chancery-laws!
Could really show
A handsome face, as faces go
In this Flowery Land, where, you must know,
The finest flowers of beauty grow.
He'd the very widest kind of jaws,
And his nails were like an eagle's claws,
And—though it may seem a wondrous tail—
(Truth is mighty and will prevail!)
He'd a queue as long as the deepest cause
Under the Emperor's chancery-laws!
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Yet how he managed to win Min—Ne
The men declared they could n't see;
But all the ladies, over their tea,
In this one point were known to agree:—
Four gifts were sent to aid his plea:
A smoking-pipe with a golden clog,
A box of tea, and a poodle dog,
And a painted heart that was all a-flame,
And bore, in blood, the lover's name.
The men declared they could n't see;
But all the ladies, over their tea,
In this one point were known to agree:—
Four gifts were sent to aid his plea:
A smoking-pipe with a golden clog,
A box of tea, and a poodle dog,
And a painted heart that was all a-flame,
And bore, in blood, the lover's name.
Ah! how could presents pretty as these
A delicate lady fail to please?
She smoked the pipe with the golden clog,
And drank the tea, and ate the dog,
And kept the heart,—and that 's the way
The match was made, the gossips say.
A delicate lady fail to please?
She smoked the pipe with the golden clog,
And drank the tea, and ate the dog,
And kept the heart,—and that 's the way
The match was made, the gossips say.
I can't describe the wedding day,
Which fell in the lovely month of May;
Nor stop to tell of the Honey-Moon,
And how it vanished all too soon;
Alas! that I the truth must speak,
And say that in the fourteenth week,
Soon as the wedding-guests were gone,
And their wedding-suits began to doff,
Min-Ne was weeping and “taking on,”
For he had been trying to “take her off!”
Which fell in the lovely month of May;
Nor stop to tell of the Honey-Moon,
And how it vanished all too soon;
Alas! that I the truth must speak,
And say that in the fourteenth week,
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And their wedding-suits began to doff,
Min-Ne was weeping and “taking on,”
For he had been trying to “take her off!”
Six wives before he had sent to Heaven,
And being partial to number “Seven,”
He wished to add his latest pet,
Just, perhaps, to make up the set!
Mayhap the rascal found a cause
Of discontent in a certain clause
In the Emperor's very liberal laws,
Which gives, when a Golden Belt is wed,
Six hundred pounds to furnish the bed;
And if in turn he marry a score,
With every wife six hundred more.
And being partial to number “Seven,”
He wished to add his latest pet,
Just, perhaps, to make up the set!
Mayhap the rascal found a cause
Of discontent in a certain clause
In the Emperor's very liberal laws,
Which gives, when a Golden Belt is wed,
Six hundred pounds to furnish the bed;
And if in turn he marry a score,
With every wife six hundred more.
First he tried to murder Min-Ne
With a special cup of poisoned tea;
But the lady, smelling a mortal foe,
Cried, “Ho-Ho!
I'm very fond of mild Souchong,
But you—my love—you make it too strong!”
With a special cup of poisoned tea;
But the lady, smelling a mortal foe,
Cried, “Ho-Ho!
I'm very fond of mild Souchong,
But you—my love—you make it too strong!”
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At last Ho-Ho, the treacherous man,
Contrived the most infernal plan
Invented since the world began:
He went and got him a savage dog,
Who 'd eat a woman as soon as a frog,
Kept him a day without any prog,
Then shut him up in an iron bin,
Slipped the bolt, and locked him in;
Then giving the key
To poor Min-Ne,
Said, “Love, there 's something you must n't see
In the chest beneath the orange-tree.”
[OMITTED]
Poor, mangled Min-Ne! with her latest breath,
She told her father the cause of her death;
And so it reached the Emperor's ear,
And his Highness said, “It is very clear,
Ho-Ho has committed a murder here!”
Contrived the most infernal plan
Invented since the world began:
He went and got him a savage dog,
Who 'd eat a woman as soon as a frog,
Kept him a day without any prog,
Then shut him up in an iron bin,
Slipped the bolt, and locked him in;
Then giving the key
To poor Min-Ne,
Said, “Love, there 's something you must n't see
In the chest beneath the orange-tree.”
[OMITTED]
Poor, mangled Min-Ne! with her latest breath,
She told her father the cause of her death;
And so it reached the Emperor's ear,
And his Highness said, “It is very clear,
Ho-Ho has committed a murder here!”
And he doomed Ho-Ho to end his life
By the terrible dog that killed his wife;
But in mercy (let his praise be sung!)
His thirteen brothers were merely hung,
And his slaves bambooed, in the mildest way,
For a calendar month, three times a day,
And that 's the way that Justice dealt
With wicked Ho-Ho of the Golden Belt!
By the terrible dog that killed his wife;
But in mercy (let his praise be sung!)
His thirteen brothers were merely hung,
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For a calendar month, three times a day,
And that 's the way that Justice dealt
With wicked Ho-Ho of the Golden Belt!
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