University of Virginia Library

LETTER XXIX.
ANNE TO ELENOR.

I WILL suppose you to have read the marquis's
letter, and am sure I need not expatiate on the
delight it conveyed to my mind. I became impatient
for the arrival of Sarah; moments appeared
hours, hours days, and days weeks. Think
then, by this mode of computation, what an immense
period a whole fortnight must have appeared;
for so long it was before I embraced my
friend; and when she did come, to pale, so
changed was she, that my heart bled as I contemplated
her depressed countenance. Frederic
Lewis could only deliver her in safety to me, and

set off the next morning to join his ship which
had arrived at Plymouth. When he left Dublin,
as mentioned by the marquis, in a state of suspence
concerning his sister, the anxiety of his
mind, joined to a cold which he took about that
time, brought on a fever; and he obtained leave
to return in a pilot boat which passed them the
second day after they were out. But on his
reaching land, his disorder became so violent as
to confine him to his bed for a very considerable
period; and left him so weak that it was much
longer before he was enabled to renew his inquiries,
and he had only discovered the place of
Sarah's residence the day previous to his encountering
lord H. He had in the course of his inquiries,
heard so many things to her disadvantage,
that even his faith in her virtue began to be
staggered, and he resolved to watch and ascertain
who visited her, and by what means she was
supported. Resolved, should he find her involved
in shame and guilt, to write to her, give her the
means of returning to England, but to see her no
more. He had placed himself in the long passage
for this purpose but a few minutes, when lord H—
entered, and he immediately concluded him to
have been the original seducer, and present supporter
of his sister; notwithstanding all his pretended
anxiety. Indeed, he said it had often,
during his illness occurred to him, that the
marquis knew where she was, and concealed her,
pretending she left him only to blind Ryan, who
considered her (it was plain) as an object of envy
and jealousy. You know how this rencountre
terminated. When Frederic found his sister
perfectly innocent, which was evinced by her pale
countenance, exhausted frame, and plain coarse
babiliments, he execrated the wretches who had
so inhumanly persecuted her. He conducted her
to another lodging, and thought of nothing but
hastening her departure from Ireland; but before
they had proceeded a day's journey, he perceived
it would he impossible to proceed in her present
weak state. He stopped at a pleasant village,
and having procured medical advice; having
satisfied himself that nothing but rest and peace
were necessary to restore her; he wrote to the
admiralty to lengthen his time of leave, and
quietly awaited for her strength to recruit. This
occasioned the delay which was to me so intolerable;
for as they knew I had heard from the
marquis of H— of her safety, and whose protection
she was under, they did not think it necessary
to write, daily hoping to recommence their
journey.

When Frederic took leave of his sister, he recommended
her not to take any steps to see
her husband; he even thought she ought to
oppose any advancement made by Darnley for
a re-union; and I was of his opinion. I will give
you her answer. “I will own to you, my brother,
that I never found any great portion of felicity in
my union with Mr. Darnley; yet when I entered
into marriage with him, I resolved, to the utmost
of my abilities, to perform the duties incumbent

on the sacred obligation. My separation from
him was enforced by necessity; but had I known
the misery of a state of separation, how forlorn,
how desolate, how totally unprotected a married
woman is, when separated from her husband;
how every one thinks he may insult her with
impunity, and no one will take the trouble to
defend her, but rather unite in aspersing and
depressing her, even to the very earth—I would
have never thrown myself into so deplorable a
situation. I will make no overtures towards a re-union;
but should he solicit me to pardon his
unkind neglect, and again share his fate, I shall
certainly do it; I apprehend that I have by no
means been free from blame in my conduct towards
him; I have been thoughtless in my expenditures.
I perhaps have not fulfilled his
expectations in respect to the tenderness of a
wife. Alas! it is hard to teach the countenance
or tongue to express what the heart does not
feel. Do not be angry, Frederic, but I am convinced
I shall never again appear respectable in
the eyes of the world, until I am again under my
husband's protection.”

Frederic would have combatted her opinion, but
it was useless; all he could obtain, was a promise
that she would no farther seek him, than to acquaint
him with her return, and then act as
circumstances should direct. She has accordingly
written a note, which to-morrow I shall dispatch
to him. I hardly know whether to censure
or applaud her resolution. She has suffered

greatly both with him, and from him; perhaps,
should any means of their living in some degree
of ease and plenty offer, they may taste more
happiness than has yet fallen to their portion.
He, so long abridged of the comforts of domestic
regularity, and the pleasures which must
arise from the society of a good humored, rational
companion, will, I should think, hear of
her return with delight, and invite her home
with the ardor of a lover long separated from
his mistress.

My dear Sarah has kept a regular journal, if
so it can be called, of every occurrence which
took place, from her quitting Mrs. Bellamy's to
the time of her meeting Frederic. It was addressed
to me, with a design should any event
have put a period to her existence, it might
have been transmitted to me, and have justified
her to her father, should he ever return, or her
brother, whom at that time she had but little
hope of seeing again so soon. I have obtained
leave to send it to you; it will explain many
circumstances which at present appear problematical,
and will, I think, greatly interest your
feelings. When you have perused, you will be
so good as to return it by the next post, as every
thing which bears the impression of Sarah's
hand is valuable to me. When any new circumstances
occur, I will inform you.